


One Of Us

by Tiredteengaer



Series: Dick Grayson is baby [4]
Category: Batman (Comics), DCU
Genre: Age Swap, Batfamily (DCU) Feels, Brotherly Love, Bruce Wayne is Batman, Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Cass is third, Cassandra Cain is Black Bat, Court of Owls, Damian Wayne is Robin, Damian is Fourth and Dick is the youngest., Dick Grayson Gets a Hug, Dick Grayson Needs a Hug, Dick Grayson Whump, Dick Grayson is a Talon, Dick Grayson-centric, Dick has wings, Hallucinations, Hurt Dick Grayson, Hurt/Comfort, Jason Todd is Red Hood, Jason is the oldest, Mute Dick Grayson, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Robin Dick Grayson, Protective Bruce Wayne, Protective Parent Bruce Wayne, Recovery, Tim Drake is Red Robin, Tim is second, We don't know her, What Canon?, at least for a while
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:00:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 22
Words: 120,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25882507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiredteengaer/pseuds/Tiredteengaer
Summary: Dick Grayson was first taken away from his home at the circus and then 2 years later, from his home at the Wayne Manor and forced into a shell of his own being by the Court of Owl's manipulation.50 days later, he's rescued and bought back, a half brain washed and supposably dangerous talon. But that doesn't mean his true self is gone for good. And fortunately for him, his family will do all they can to fully bring him back to them.ORA recovery fic as Dick learns to be loved again and makes a recovery journey back to his old self.
Relationships: Alfred Pennyworth & Bruce Wayne, Cassandra Cain & Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson & Jason Todd, Tim Drake & Dick Grayson
Series: Dick Grayson is baby [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1761397
Comments: 322
Kudos: 553





	1. Art therapy

**Author's Note:**

> **Bat Family from Oldest to youngest.**
> 
> -Alfred  
> -Bruce  
> -Jason (21)  
> -Tim (18)  
> -Cass (17)  
> -Damian (15)  
> -Dick (10)

Talon sat poised, back straight as a board, watching the lace curtains flap gently, gently breezing through the feathers of his wings. He liked this room. It was light and didn't feel as sinister as the rest of the Mansion. 

Wayne Manor. His house. His home apparently. 

Talon wasn't sure about the house. Or the people within it. It felt crowded and empty at the same time. Talon had become used to small spaces. He didn't like them. He hates them really. But it's all he could remember. He truly believed he'd spent his whole life like this. Trapped in fear and unable to free himself. Reserved and a prisoner.

They said that it wasn't true. The men in this house told him he'd only been....like this...for 50 days. The old man said they'd been running themselves ragged trying to find him. And they'd finally done so two weeks ago. They'd been thrilled to find him....

.....and then had been heartbroken when they realised that Talon didn't remember them. Every being in him had screamed to not trust them and to fight them off. But...Talon was scared. He knew better then to disobey orders and the man had told him to come with them. Everytime he'd disobeyed an order or fought back against Cobb, the grandmaster or superior talons, he'd been severely punished. So he'd stayed frozen as he'd been picked up and carried away from the underground Chambers. From the only 'home' He remembered belonging to. 

He'd fought them when they'd strapped him down on the table at yet another underground chamber. He wouldn't let himself be tormented again. He refused. But really, he had no chance. They were more in number and larger and his training hadn't been completed. He wasn't that good of a fighter. The next thing he'd known, he was knocked unconscious. 

He'd woken up eventually and had stiffened, waiting for the pain to strike or to notice any new differences in his modified body. There were no new scars or searing pain in his body. Instead, he'd woken up to concerned faces and gentle hugs. Dick couldn't remember the last time he was hugged or even physically touched without having harm bought on him. Talons didn't do gentle. The only physical touch allowed was for combat. 

He remembered flinching away. They'd looked strange when he'd done that. Talon wasn't that good at Reading emotions. But he knew they didn't look happy. And that wasn't good. If they weren't happy that meant they were angry. And angry leaders meant hurtful punishments. 

And yet, they'd surprised him again. They hadn't punished him. They'd promised they'd never do that to him. The skinny one- Tim, he remembered- claimed that they were family. And family didn't hurt each other. 

Talon hadn't known what to think of that. But they'd kept their promise. The only touches he received were head pats and comforting hugs and he knew it had at least been a few weeks since he'd been bought away from the court. 

The rest of his fellow warriors weren't here though. Talon wondered what had truly become of them, remembering those with wings like his and those who could almost pass off as just regular humans. Talon almost wished he was amongst them again. It wasn't like he liked them. Quite the opposite. They were harsh and mean and truly seemed to have no thoughts of their own (something which Dick had shamefully resented and envied them for) but at least they were alike him. With them, he didn't feel so confused. Or so much like an outsider. But.....the confusion was better then the fear. The people here were nice. Loving. 

They were amazing. He didn't shy away from them anymore, at least not in a rabid manner. They were gentle and....and nice. Warm and loving. Like a family. 

_Family._

Talon hadn't been sure what to make of that. He had thought for sure it was another cruel joke by the court of owls. He was a talon after all. An assassin. He was suppose to be a slave to the court. He couldn't have a family. But when they had finally manged to bring him back home and usher him upstairs from the safe confines of the cave, he'd found proof. Large portraits and pictures aligned the hallways and Talon had been unable to tear his eyes away from himself....or the older version of him. There were some of just him and the big man- Bruce. There was a portrait of the full family and sure enough he stood right next to Bruce, a huge grin on his face making him look almost unrecognisable. Talon couldn't remember the last time he'd smile like that. He couldn't even recognise himself or the life he'd seemed to have led before the court of owls. He hadn't even known he'd _had_ a life before the court of owls. 

A strong gust of wind bought his attention back to his surroundings and he tensed as the gust of air caused several of the objects in the room to shift around. A paint brush rolled off the drawing table and clattered onto the floor, the noise echoing in his ears. Panic gushed through him and he scrambled up to snag it from the floor, hurrying to prop it back in place. His masters and trainers at the the court _hated_ when things were out of their places. Everything and everyone had to be at in place and it didn't matter who had disobeyed, anyone caught on the site was punished. 

He hastened to place the brush back but froze as a knock reverted through the room. He stumbled back as the door swung open and dropped on the floor, eyes wide as he stared up at one of the bat boys. It was the oldest one, the one with the white streak in his hair and green eyes. He paused as his eyes raked over the younger boy, and he bit his lip as he hesitantly stepped inside the room. 

'Hey, kid.' He called, keeping his tone gentle as he shut the door behind him, trapping talon with him. Talon tried to hold his whimpers in like he'd been taught to do as he curled up on himself, the paintbrush still held taught in his hands. He didn't want to get punished, he'd been doing as he'd been told to do, but he wasn't even allowed to explain himself, he wasn't allowed to question their authority-

'I've been looking at you all over the house. What're you doing in here?' He questioned, looking unsure of himself. He fidgeted with his hands and messed with his hair, trying to smile kindly at the boy. Talon bit his lip, unsure of himself as he cautiously raised the hand clamped around the brush and showed it to the older ma- his eldest brother. So far everything had been so different here then from the court. Maybe he was allowed to explain himself? 

Jason raised a skeptical brow, looking around the room. 'You're painting? You're into that kind of stuff now?' 

_Was_ he suppose to be into this kind of stuff? They had made it clear that they wanted him to steer clear of all violent activities or anything he'd been expected to do at the court and _painting_ was the last thing they would want their assassins to take part in. But did that mean the Waynes wanted him to take part in it? He couldn't take any risks. There had been no beatings or any form of torture or abuse for almost two weeks and he wanted to keep it that way. And they were really nice to him. If he disobeyed them, maybe they'd stop being so nice to him and would turn cruel. He wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt but just in case-

He nodded hesitantly and Jason's eyes lit up. He moved to crouch in front of the boy, lowering himself to his eye level, 'That's great, Dick. Unexpected but great. Alfred and Damian will probably be really pleased.' 

Talon perked up at that. He'd like that. If it would make those around him happy with him, he'd do it. He shuffled to sit up properly and gripped the brush tighter, his knuckles whitening. Jason eyed the brush and looked around the room at where the third brother kept his supplies. 'I'll help you get some paper and paint. Come on.' He held out a large hand and Talon worked to stay put and not flinch away like he wanted to. A second passed and once he was sure Jason wasn't going to hurt him, he cautiously placed his own smaller one in it. The twenty year old's fingers enclosed around his and warmth spread through him, not the burning kind that would seep through his skin and burn him from within. Nor the suffocating and claustrophobic heat that always seemed to occupy the Chambers and his coffin. This warmth felt....nice. Safe. Secure. 

Jason pulled him to his feet and led him to the cabinet and Talon watched as he clicked it open, and began rummaging through the objects. He stepped back once he had picked out what he'd wanted and Talon observed he was carrying multiple colourful tubes and a few books. He followed the older man to the drawing table from where the brush had fallen from in the first place and watched as he let all the items drop, seeming to enjoy the loud clatters. Next, he dragged out the chair that has been pushed neatly in and gestured for Talon to sit. 

Talon gave him a dubious look but obeyed and perched on the almost uncomfortable wooden slack. Jason picked up one of the books and flipped through them, presumably finding the ones with instructions for his task. But when he placed it back down, all that stared back at him was a blank page. 

Talon blinked, confused. Was this some kind of test? Was he suppose to figure out a secret code? Or...had he already been given instructions for his task and the blank page was where he was suppose to start? Had he blanked out? How was that possible? He always made sure to pay attention to the orders and instructions given to him, he knew his masters didn't like it when they had to repeat. His wings caved around him cautiously, protecting him from any possible blows as he looked away from the blank page to look up dubiously at Jason, a hint of fear dancing in his eyes. 

Jason tilted his head, trying to decipher what the younger boy was trying to convey. It was difficult. Since being back from the court, Dick had been all but mute, safe for the few times he'd burst into loud tears or awoken with shilling screams from yet another terrifying nightmare. It was such a sharp contrast to the boy from before, who could chat anyone's ear off and would talk about the most minuscule events from his day in excruciating detail. Jason never had to sit and actually think about what Dick was trying to convey, at least not as much as he had to for the others. But now, with Dick being too afraid to speak his mind, he was usually left grasping in air for any answers. 

But Jason was a bat and if the bats were fluent in any language, it was body language. And currently, with Dick's wings curving around him protectively, his painfully tight grasp on the brush and the large sad eyes, he can deduce that today's not a good day for his little brother. Dick's scared, that much is clear. Of who and what is not and it's frustrating because he was doing so much better. He wasn't as loud and touchy and confident as he'd once been but at least he didn't flinch away from them. 

But the boy had his bad days too and it seemed like today was one of those days when he couldn't quite grasp that he was loved and cherished and _safe_ . And as frustrating as the lack of communication and progress could be, Jason had long ago learnt to be patient, especially when it came to the youngest bird. 

So, he pulled up a chair from behind him and plopped down on it. Leaning his elbows on his knees and he kept his voice low and soothing as he asked, 'What is it, little wing? Do you not like the paints I chose? Do you want to see for yourself?' 

Talon tilted his head in confusion, slowly shaking his head in a no. That was another thing that always threw him off. These people always..... _asked_ him what he wanted or how he felt. And it wasn't in the condescending or mocking manner the court did. They didn't give him a choice to punish him or to taunt him with possibilities he can't have. Instead they gave him choices and...respected them. It felt almost too good to be true. 

Which was why he was always too scared to really answer. But he was expected to give some form of reply so he settled in a shake of the head. No, it wasn't the colours. They were pretty and bright. So unlike everything else from the court. He quite liked them actually. 

Jason sighed and picked up a pencil, flicking it with his fingers as he spun it between his fingers. Talon observed the movement, fascinated. Perhaps this was what he was suppose to do? Had Jason done this before and he'd missed it? Maybe he was demonstrating again? He observed the way the digits danced and curved around each other as they balanced the thin wood between them, spinning and catching it, tuning out Jason's voice. He seemed to push the back of the pencil using his thumb and balanced it on his forefinger before shifting it to his middle and then his finger. The pinky supported the tip of the pencil and shifted around as it was passed from one finger to another in a smooth circular motion over and over again. He glanced down at the brush in his hand and then back at the pencil. They seemed roughly of the same size and weight, though his brush was thinner. If he reduced the amount of pressure being used, he could probably spin it successfully. 

With determination, he focused on the brush and spun it, eyes alighting with delight as the brush swept through his fingers in a motion alike to Jason's. He caught it nimbly between his thumb and forefinger, feeling oddly nostalgic at the action. He looked up at Jason for approval but shrunk back when he realised the man didn't look pleased. Not really. 

Jason on the other hand, was feeling widely uncomfortable and angry. Not at Dick of course, never at him. But at the stupid court. The son of bitches who had ruined his little brother, taken him away and torn him down before manifesting him into....a mindless weapon. Or at least had attempted to. They'd found Dick before his _training_ and _transformation_ had been complete. It was why Dick's eyes only had speck of yellow swirling in the blue and why his wings could only glide rather then fly. It was why his skin was not as pale as the others, why he still had common han needs and why he still understood human emotions, still felt. He had been conditioned to fear, to submit, to fight but not to stop feeling. 

He'd been wracking his mind for why Dick had looked so unsure of himself until the boy had done the little action with the paintbrush and it filled him with sadness as he understood. A mindless loyal weapon. That had been the court's conditioning for their victims and while Dick may not have fully fledged into a talon, he wasn't that far off. Unlike the others, he was capable of thinking for himself and making his own decisions but he chose not to out of fear, which was worse. He'd been waiting for instructions from Jason, just like the court had taught him to do. 

Of course, it could just be that the boy was awed by his big brother playing with the pencil and had wanted to try it out for himself but Jason highly doubted that. After all, Dick had been the one who'd taught him the trick, so why would he be awed by a stunt he himself had learnt years ago? But the again, it's not like Dick remembered anything from his life before the courts. He hadn't remembered his name, age, anything. He hadn't even remembered the death of his parents or being taken on by Batman. (He could later admit that there had been a vague familiarity of the vigilantes, just clear enough for him to let his guard down) . So maybe it was silly to think he'd remember something as juvenile as a pencil trick. 

Shaking himself away from his thoughts, Jason gave Dick the tiniest smile, doing his best to not frown like he wanted to. 'Buddy, are you waiting for instructions? Just....nod, if I'm right.'

Dick looked at him cautiously, calculating, always careful now, never trusting. Not anymore. 

'I won't be mad at you' Jason promised. 'I won't hurt you. I would never.'

Dick continued to stare at him before nervously nodding and Jason had to bite his cheek to stop himself from letting out a string of unforgiving curses. It was a small trick Alfred had taught him when Jason had managed to piss off some prissy snobs at Bruce's stupid galas a few too many times. Still worked wonders. 

'Dick, there's no instruction from this. Just....use any paints you like. Any colour. And use them on the paper. You can paint anything, you can even just paint the entire page pink for all I care. Nothing to worry about.'

He stared blankly at him. No instructions? Was this a test? 

At Dick's blank stare, Jason shifted forward and plucked the sketchbook from the table and straightened his pencil. He mulled over his options as he tried to explain. 'Okay, I guess I'm going too fast with the whole no instructions thing. Too soon. How about-' He drew a slightly squiggly circle on the page before handing it to Dick. 'Paint inside that circle. I mean....if you want to.'

Talon relaxed as he took the sketch ad back and placed it back to it's place. That was better. Much less confusing. He'd been given clear cut instructions. He just had to fill the circle with.....what exactly? Jason seemed to want him to choose himself. And they'd been encouraging him to do so for a while now. They'd been patient with his hesitancy and his confusion so far but he'd better get a grip before they snap. He reached for a red tube and held it up to Jason, silently asking for his approval,unable to truly give in and do what he wanted. 

'You can choose any colour you like. Whatever you want, I don't mind.' 

Talon internally sighed. Back to being confusing. 

But he suppose he might as well follow through. He unscrewed the cap and stared at the goop of smooth scarlet paint before he took a brush and swiped at it. He made sure to keep an eye on Jason's body language from the side of his eye to make sure he wasn't getting aggressive and to make sure he wasn't disapproving. But the man merely leant back in his chair and pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. He pulled one out and flicked on his lighter, holding it up to the mouth. Dick turned his attention back to the page and swiped the brush carefully around the edges, doing his best to stay within the lines. 

Jason pointed his chin at the roof as he blew out the smoke, glad the window was open so that Alfred wouldn't kill him. He'll make sure to spray some perfume or air freshener later. Dropping his head back, he observed Dick at work, feeling his heart clench a little. The fact that Dick followed instructions so.... _mindlessly_ , hurt. He had no doubt that if he'd told Dick to paint in the circle a few months ago, the kid would have painted everywhere _but_ in the circle, merely because he didn't like being told what to do. The only time he actually listened to instructions was when he was training with Bruce to be Robin. He'd never actually gotten to being a Robin, being taken away from them before Damian had passed on the mantle to him. He tilted his head as he observed the boy at work, watching the sunlight bounce off his wings. The red and bronze feathers weirdly complimented the boy but the glow the boy's skin had diminished. His wings had made it impossible for him to wear shirts but Jason would much rather eat his own tongue rather then let him wear the outfits the court had tailored for him. Alfred and Tim had burnt them as soon as they finished investigating them anyway. 

Dick had almost painted half the circle until Jason spoke up again. 'Hey, you know you can choose more colours, right?' "

Talon looked up at him quizzically until it clicked and he let an almost excited look cross over his features. He didn't have any personal mundane belongings back in the court (other then his coffin, his uniform and his mask). Why would he? He was just a weapon, one with supposedly no needs other that serving the court. 

But here, he had a whole room full of his personal belongings including variety of clothes, books and toys. He still didn't dare to touch any of them, despite the vigilantes assuring him that he had every right to go through them. 

But having something offered to him without any hidden agenda was....exciting. He turned back and flicked his eyes through his options before choosing a yellow and green paint tube. He held it up to Jason shyly, and the vigilante nodded approvingly. 'What ever you want.' He patiently repeated. 'This is like art therapy. Its suppose to help you a lot. Alfred and Bruce tried to get you into it when you first came to live here but it used to revolt you.' 

Talon was surprised by that. He didn't recall any of that. 

'You can use any colours you want. You can paint anything you want, however you want. You don't even have to stay in the lines.'

Talon looked back at him, surprised. Was that really allowed? Jason was basically telling him to _not_ be perfect. That was....odd to say the least. 

At his skeptical look, Jason laughed. It was odd to be holding a one sided conversation with _Dick_ of all people but he'd gotten somewhat used to it. And as moody and confusing Dick had become now, some of his old personality shined through sometimes and it was a delightful relief. It kept him hopeful that the older version of his little brother was still in there somewhere. 'I'm not joking, Kid. Just have some fun. I promise I won't be mad.' 

Talon shifted to sit straight and eagerly swiped at the yellow paint, watching with interest as the brush swept over the page, watching as the plain canvas was covered by the bright colour. He relaxed as he worked, zoning out as he got himself lost in the art. He couldn't bring himself to relax completely, making sure to not be _too_ messy. His wings, which he usually kept alert and prim, slowly relaxed and hung from his back. The warm summer air felt pleasant and for the first time in his life (at least that of which he could remember) he felt....relaxed. He couldn't really say happy, he didn't really know what that felt like. Mostly he felt scared or upset or confused. This was a new feeling. It was good. 

Jason leant his elbow against the wall and rested his head against it, continuing to inhale and exhale the smoke out as he silently watched his little brother work. Dick had never been an artistic child, detesting any quiet activity that required him to sit and focus for hours. It was why he'd found school so bothersome, whining to his brothers and his guardian about how he couldn't possibly be expected to sit in a stiff uniform and stare blankly at the board and tried his best to convince them to let him drop out. He'd been an extremely active child, never able to sit still, climbing anything he could find, (including his family members) chattering everyone's ear off and giggling and laughing as he messed around with pranks. 

He was a shell of his old persona now and while Jason missed the old kid, he was just glad to have him back, no matter what his new personal was. Jason hadn't realised how empty and dull the manor and family would be without Dick.

The ten year old was slowly growing lost in his task, his arm plastered against the wet paint as he clumsily filled the page with the three colours. He glanced longingly at the pretty gold paint tube but didn't dare touch it or use it. Jason had been kind enough to let him use the products he was currently using, he didn't went to overstep and piss him off. He squeezed some of the green paint on his brush and slowly dragged it down the page in a curvy stile, leaving broken zigzags on the mess of the art he'd made. 

The time passed pretty quickly, quicker then he was used to. His perception of time wasn't as good as it should be, having not seen anything other then the inside of the Chambers for 50 days, having gotten used to spending day and night in underground Chambers. But he knows quite a bit of time has passed because when he finally drops the brush, the shadows had grown in length, the sun was lower and he could hear soft chatter from downstairs, his now somewhat enhanced hearing able to pick up softer sounds then an average human. He furrowed his brow as he tried to decipher who was talking and he managed to conclude that they belonged to Bruce, which meant the slightly higher voice must be his second brother. If they were back from work, that means it was after six. Tim had said they would either be back at home from work at six Pm or at nine pm. Considering it was still pretty light outside, he supposed today had been an early day. 

'Aah shit.' Jason cursed, seeming to have picked up on their return too. He scrambled up and disappeared out of the room and Talon stared after him, wondering if he was suppose to follow or clean up first. Before he could come to a decision, Jason hurried back with a brightly coloured spray bottle and shook it before pressing down the nozzle. White mist hissed out and a few seconds later, the heavy smoke smell was replaced with a floral scent. Jason walked around the room and continued to air it out, glancing over his shoulder at the younger boy and smiling. 'You done pup?' 

Pup. That was him. It was one of the many names they'd assigned to him. Talon didn't really mind. They confused him but they weren't said with malicious intent so he could make his peace with it. He nodded and shifted, waiting for Jason to tell him to clean up. Or was that already implied? He wished they would come up with some concrete rules so he could stop being so unsure about everything. He didn't like not knowing what to do. 

'Did you have fun?'

Talon raised a brow, surprised by his question. But he quickly schooled his expression back to being blank. He didn't want to anger or offend the older man. Instead, he nodded because truly, it had been enjoyable. 

'Wanna try this again? Art therapy might be good for you. I'll go through videos which could help you- that you'd enjoy. What do you think, kid?'

Shock washed over him. Jason was encouraging an activity that was just for _fun?_ And he hadn't even done a good job-

-but he _would_ really like to do this again. It was fun. And pretty stress free. 

He nodded, wishing he could express his willingness and gratitude any other way but....he hadn't used his voice is so long other than for staring the court's official phrase before finishing an assignment. He wasn't ready to start speaking again. But his family said that was okay. That he could take as long as he wanted. 

Jason finished up freshening the room and placed the cap back on, grinning at the boy. 'Great. Let's mark that sketchbook so demon spawn knows it's reserved for you.' He stalked over to Dick and picked up an unused brush, flipping the sketchbook shut to the black cover page. He dipped the brush in thick red paint and handed it to the little bird. 'Why don't you write your name on the cover? Big letters.'

Talon blinked up at him. His name.... 

Putting all his concentration into the task, he dragged the brush from the top to the bottom of the cover, leaving behind a thick red line. Next, he drew a shorter horizontal line over it to draw a T. He was about to move on to the next letter when Jason placed his hand over his shoulder. 

'Your name starts with a D not a T.'

Talon frowned at that. He may not remember much but he knew how to spell talon. Maybe the man wanted him to write Grayson? But even that started with a G not a D-

He shook his head, trying to convey that Jason was wrong - 

His eyes widened. What was he doing, correcting a superior? God, he's such an idiot-

'Your name is Dick. Dick Grayson. Not-' his face contorted angrily but he quickly smoothened them back into the soft look he always gave him. 'Not Talon. Not Grayson. Or whatever else those bastards called you. You're Dick.' 

Talon continued staring up at him and Jason internally sighed. It seemed the boy still needed a tiny nudge. Situating himself behind Dick's chair and reached over him to wrap his fingers around Dick's hand which was in turn clutching the brush. Placing his free hand behind Dick's neck, he scratched the Base of his head as he carefully turned the T into a D. 

Moving on, the name slowly came to life as both Jason and Talon traced the letters one by one, until his name, his old persona was staring up at him. Jason carefully plucked the brush away and sat it away, smiling at his youngest brother and scratching his head. 'That's who you are. You're Dick. Dick Grayson Wayne. Say that?' 

Talon stared at the name and traced his forefinger down the I. The paint stuck to the pad of his finger. 

'Dick?'

Talon closed his eyes and squirmed a little. He pulled his finger away and nodded with distaste that it looked a little too much like blood. 

Jason sighed and ran a hand through his hair once. 'That's alright. You don't have to say it out loud. Just as long as you know who you are and what you are to us, it's good enough.' Talon looked up at him. 'Got that?' 

Talon- no no no, _Dick. < /i> He was Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne's ward, the youngest bat of the family, someone _with_ a family. Someone who had finally received the love and affection he'd been so deprived from and someone who would do anything to make others happy._

_'Dick.' He rasped, his voice croaky and coming out cracked, due to the lack of use. His throat burned as he managed to push the word out but it was worth it to see Jason's eyes light up. Dick couldn't help smile back at his joyous grin._

_Talon- Dick was healing. It was a slow journey but he was making progress and with his family, maybe....Just maybe one day he'd be okay. For now, he was content with being the reason Jason was smiling like that._


	2. Rumble of a thunder

Talon stared up at his ceiling, his body sinking further into the the too soft mattress with each flinch bought on by the loud cracks and rumbles of the storm brewing outside. With each deafening thunder, the glass in his windows rattled threateningly, leaving Talon with an unsettling paranoia creep through his skin. 

He didn't like it. Five weeks into living with the Wayne's, he'd began to let his guard down. Slowly but surely, the protective layers were being peeled away and it had been a while since he'd felt truly terrified. And now....well,he was forgetting what feeling _safe_ felt like. 

The calming green light illuminated from the night light was disturbed as lightening struck through the sky, lighting his belongings up for a split second before innocently retreating, but Talon's eyes widened in fear. He scrambled up, the blanket seeming to tangle and tighten around his body as he stared in terror at the corner. He saw him there, he _swears_ he'd seen the wretched man hunched in the corner-

Lightening struck again and this time, Talon allowed his eyes to dart to the window and he felt his heartbeat (what little of it which was left) all but stop.

_Talons_

_Talons everywhere_

They swooped through the sky, the hard rain barely slowing them down as their large bronze wings spread wide and, their tinted goggles all staring at him through the window. Heart in his throat, Talon blinked and a second later, he saw them. The grandmaster and his friends, dressed in fancy suits and expensive gowns and hidden behind the plain white masks as they somehow managed to stare scornfully at him, cold, brutal, _ruthless-_

The hair on the back of his neck stood up as their cruel laughs echoed in his ears and he began to struggle, rushing to free himself and run for cover. The more he tried to escape, the tighter the stupid blanket seemed to wound around him, trapping him, keeping him in place until the owls came to collect their claim, but he won't go back, _he refuses-_

His wings shot up and straightened out, the end of it managing to cut through the fabric of the blanket, leaving an escape through and Talon waved his arm free and _ripped_ the rest of the wretched cloth off him. Finally free, he jumped to his feet, willing himself to not look back at his captors and fellow owls because now was not the time, he had to _get out-_

His training and enhanced hearing allowed him to pick up the sound of feet approaching only a split second before the door was nudged open and Talon froze, scrambling to get away from the new comer. Somewhere in the back of his mind he heard an annoyingly familiar voice demanding him to fight, to attack but he hadn't fought anyone for a while and even when he used to sparr back in the court, he barely ever won. 

The stranger stepped into the room, his movement seeming controlled and hesitant. Were they preparing to attack? Analysing the best method? Talon should do the same, he _knew_ that but he was panicking too much-

'Dick?' the silhouette called, stepping into the room so that the calming green light. (which had transitioned to suffocating and dizzying in a span of few minutes for Talon) His arm was raised and reaching for the wall and a second later the room was flooded in light and Talon blinked as his eyes adjusted to the brightness. 

Tim Drake stared down at him, his brow wrinkling in what Talon could decipher as concern. 'Hey buddy...what's wrong? Why are you out of bed?' 

Talon stated up at him dumbly, before remembering what has freaked him out, and his head snapped to the corner where he had sworn he'd seen Cobb standing only to see-

Nothing. 

He turned to look at the window and had to crane his neck up to look out from his position on the floor (when had he sat on the floor?) and just like the corner, the Wayne Manor's gardens were empty and the only thing to see was the flowers and trees being attacked by the heavy droplets of rain and the dark sky lightening up every now and then with a bright strike of lightening. 

Talon's wings dropped from their defensive stance and instead drooped and wrapped around himself in shame. God, he was such a disappointment-

Another loud crack of thunder echoed through the manor and as if Talon couldn't get any more pathetic, he _flinched-_

'Dick.' The voice called again and Talon saw a hand reaching out for him and he shrank further into the wall, curling into himself and pulling his wings tighter around him. The hand paused and Talon swallowed nervously. He was mad. He had upset him. Talon was going to get punished and Tim was waiting for him to get into position as he awaited his punishment. He should do it soon, maybe the man would be more merciful then the court-

The hand retreated and Talon froze, waiting for a command, a lash, _something-_

Nothing came. 

Confused, Talon cautiously unfurled his wings, peeking over them. Maybe Tim had left to collect an implement of sort? The court never beat him with just their hands, considering him too low in the ranks to so much as be _touched._

But no, Tim was right there. He was situated about two meters away, sitting on his heels, hands folded in his lap. At catching his eye, a tiny hesitant smile pulled at his lips, eyes soft as he watched his baby brother. 'It's okay, Dick. It's just me.'

Talon stared at him, heart still beating faster then it had in a long time as the storm continued to rage on. Vaguely, he wished Bruce was home. The thought startled him. He didn't know why, but there was an unclear and hazy yearning to be held by Bruce, having a feeling it was something that had been practiced before during these kind of situation. 

The thought was pushed to the back of his mind as the cracking thunder continued, recalling the court and the loud bangs of the fighting ring doors slamming, of electricity zapping and crackling through his bones, of booming voices mocking him and taunting him-

Fear ran like cold ice through his veins and it must have shown on his face because Tim looked distraught as he watched him. 'There's no need to be scared. You're safe here. The storm can't hurt you.'

Talon's eyes zeroed in on Tim and he summoned all the energy he had to speak up and crack out a warning 'Owl...'

Tim's eyes widened before narrowing. His body tensed and Talon pulled his feet closer, watching him cautiously. Tense body usually meant that the owner was not happy, but Tim didn't look angry, at least not at him. 

'Owls? Do you mean Talons?' 

Too exhausted to try and make his point clearer, he simply nodded. 

'Where?' his tone had shifted from soft to sharp, eyes narrowed and shoulders tensed in a defensive stance. 

Talon paused. They hadn't been real. He knew that now. He didn't know how to explain that to Tim without speaking though. 

Trying to get his message through, he pointed at his head. 

Tim's body uncoiled as he relaxed, settling back down. 'Oh. Nightmare?' 

Talon tilted his head. It hadn't been a nightmare. He hadn't slept at all, not since Bruce had tucked him in before leaving with almost all his siblings for parole. If it wasn't a nightmare.....could they have been real? He licked his lips nervously and glanced back at the areas he'd spotted them. But no, he'd imagined them before. There had been times when he'd been convinced that he'd seen some of his old inhabitants of the court around the manor (he'd once even thought that Tim was a talon) only to be proven wrong and reassured of his safety. 

It was too confusing and overwhelming to explain though. Talon had a feeling that if he was able to feel something as subliminal as headaches, his head would be pounding now. So instead of trying to clarify, he just nodded. 

Tim stared at him in a calculating manner, before nodding slowly. 'Do you want to try to sleep? I'll stay with you.'

Talon nervously shook his head. While he didn't need to sleep as much as an average human, the bats had been trying to coax him back into the habit of resting every night, despite the fact that he only needed to sleep a day or two a week. But he didn't think he could stand another minute of staring up at the ceiling no feeling jumpy with the shadows in his room. He hoped Tim would accept that.

It seemed he did. The older boy nodded and sat back, leaning his body weight on his arms. 'Alright, we don't have to sleep. But we can do something else. Sometimes when I feel unsettled, I listen to music. We could do something like that to pass the time?' 

Talon perked up at that. As much as he was still wary around his new family, he did love when they spent time with him. And while everyone was very nice to him, something about Tim pulled taken to him. The older boy was just as authoritative as the rest, just as fiery and string but he was more....approachable. He didn't seem as threatening or as....awkward as the others did. With Tim, opening up and bonding felt easier. 

But as much as he would love company, he knew Tim had more work to do then sit and entertain a half brainwashed 10 year old assassin. If he was home and awake, that meant that not only had he been left to watch over Talon but to also monitor the comms of the rest of the family as they went on parole around the city. 

At receiving no understandable response from the Talon, Tim's slight hopeful expression fell. 'We don't have to do anything if you don't want to...no pressure, little wing.'

Talon frowned. His hesitancy and incompetence had made his big brother think he didn't want to spend time with him and had hurt him. As Tim made to get up, Talon panicked and scurried up to his feet, reaching forward to latch on to Tim's hoodie sleeve to keep him close. Two seconds after his fingers had curled around his arm, Talon jerked it away as if he was burned, eyes wide and reproachful. 

Tim, on the other hand, continued staring at his sleeve which had just been held by his brother. His heart was twisting oddly, going from ecstatic to sad. He had been taken aback but overjoyed by that momentary skin ship, proud of the fact that the boy had initiated it. Ever since the court, Dick had gone from a clingy koala to a touch starved but distant figure, not trusting anyone enough to allow proper skin ship which stretched further than someone petting his hair or squeezing his shoulder. The tiny movement had felt like a huge leap, but the rug was pulled from beneath him as Dick immediately pulled away, still unsure, still _distant._

Not for the first time, Tim felt a bitter loathing for the court, wishing he'd hurt those monsters more for taking his little brother away and breaking him to the point that the chatterbox of the family had been reduced to barely being able to push out a word or two in a day. 

The lack of speech left yet another barrier for Tim to cross. Dick was....almost a puppet. He had no real opinions or suggestions, only being comfortable enough to converse with body functions. Tim had no clue as to what the boy really wanted and while he was good at reading body language, no amount of training could help you understand the true depth of the human mind. He didn't know what Dick truly _wanted._ He'd assumed that the boy hadn't wanted his company bit when he'd made to leave, the ten year old had rushed to keep him there. Clearly, there was something the boy wanted and it was too complicated to explain without words. 

Looks like it was up to him to decipher what he wanted. 

'Do you want me to leave? Just shake or nod your head, I won't be offended.'

Slowly, Dick shook his head, looking doubtful. Tim chose to ignore that. He smiled reassuringly, shoulders relaxing as he ran a hand through his hair. 'Alright, I'll stay. Do you want to listen to music with me? Or do something else?' 

Dick tilted his head, nose scrunching unintentionally as it always used to when ever he was confused. Tim's heart ached at the familiar sight and he had to consciously stop himself from reaching up and booping his nose. 

'Sorry, two questions at once is hard to answer. Nod or shake. Do you want to listen to music?'

Dick was motionless for a while, seeming to mull over his options. And then, a shake of the head before wide eyes turned back to look at him reproach fully, almost as if he was trying to convey an apology for refusing Tim. 

That wouldn't do. Tim nodded approvingly, trying to show Dick that his opinion was appreciated (something they'd been trying to do for a while). 'That's fine. I would take you outside in the garden and play around for a while but the rain is too harsh to do anything.' He paused and looked around Dick's room to try and find an activity they could partake in and his eyes zeroed in on the book shelf. He hesitated, remembering how much Dick had disliked reading books before but a lot had changed. If Dick had taken a liking to _painting,_ maybe he'd take a liking to reading books now? He seemed to enjoy quieter, less strenuous activities since he'd been back, which made sense as anything truly physical (like trapeze or sparring) seemed to remind him of the court. Reading a bed time story was the furthest thing a talon would be allowed to do, and definitely something a 10 year old should experience so....it wouldn't hurt to ask. 'We could read a book? I'll read to you, I know English is hard for you.' 

Had it been? He couldn't remember. He understood it well, so maybe Tim was confused? But if Tim thinks he needs to improve, who was he to argue? He followed Tim's eyes to one of the large bookshelves in his room before looking back at his brother. He nodded and couldn't help the pride that swelled up as he saw Tim light up at his agreement. 

'Great! Why don't you pick a book we can read?' Tim suggested, moving to stand in front of the shelf with his hands on his hips, eyes skimming over the cover of the books. Talon trailed behind him, coming to a stop a little way behind him. He couldn't stand next to a superior. It was unheard of. 

Tim looked over his shoulder and smiled at him, though this one seemed more sad then reassuring. 'I know you have sharp eyes but don't you think it's better to not strain them? Why don't you come look at them from here?' He gestured to his left and Talon stared at him in disbelief. Was this a trick? Talon held his ground, eyes darting from Tim's face to his hand. 

The Elder's gaze turned sad, seeming to somehow understand what was going through the child's mind. 'I'm not going to hurt you Dick. I promise, I'm not like anyone in the court. None of us are. We just wat to see you happy.' He nodded at the book case and held his arm out for the boy, his fingers a breath away from touched his chin. 'And choosing a book isn't some sort of test. Nothing to worry about.'

Talon's eyes raked over the other, trying to depict any lie but came up short. Tim looked genuine and besides, they'd kept their promise so far. He really had no reason to doubt them now. 

So, he raised his hand and slid it awkwardly into Tim's, allowing the older to pull him to his side without any further fuss. He curved his large wings and tucked them close so as to avoid having them brush against Tim's body, and craned his neck up to stare at the mountains of books piled up in front of him. He watched Tim's finger stroke the bindings of the books, reading the titles out loud to him as he pondered over the choices. 

'This ones about a wizarding world. It's not really my style but Jason sure loves it. But then again, he's a pretty big nerd so maybe we shouldn't depend on his choices. Let's see..... Uh, this one is about a baby sitting club. Not really my style but I don't mind reading it. Why do you have this one? Oh, it's probably Steph's, she loves this kinda soft stuff- Hey, what you got there?' Tim's rambling was cut off as he finally snapped his attention back to his brother, who was currently entranced by the shiny red book clutched in his hands. Tim crooked his head and smiled, watching Dick's eyes widen in awe as the light hit the book just right and the glittery cover lit up, sparkling brightly. Enchanted, Dick ran a hand over the smooth cover, pulling it away to observe the skin as if to check if any of the glitter had latched on to it. His brow furrowed at the lack of sparkles and he rubbed his palm over it again, seeming to all but forget about the presence of his older brother. 

Cute. 

Unable to stop himself, Tim ran a hand through Dick's hair, eyes soft as the boy startled and looked up at him, mimicking a deer caught in the headlights. When he realised Tim didn't seem to be mad for being ignored, he relaxed and shyly held the book up at him, silently asking him to read it. 

'That's not a reading book pup. It's a picture album.' He explained. When Dick continued to look confused, he reached forward and flipped it open, landing on a picture of Jason and Talon. 'See? It's an album. Not much to read there except the date.'

Once again, Tim's words were lost on Talon as he stared at the picture. That was....him. A wingless form of him. Talon lowered himself to the ground, entranced. He traced his finger over his frozen self, noting the sharp blueness of his eyes, the darker skin, the easy grin. In the first photo, he was sprawled over Jason, the older man's face twisted in what Talon could identify as annoyance as his left hand was curled into the back of the kid's green sweater, clearly trying to pull him off. Talon wondered if the man had truly been annoyed and if so, why hadn't Talon left him alone? He never liked being a burden on anyone. 

He glanced at the next photo and paused. While it had clearly been taken on the same day, probably in a span of few hours, there was a stark difference in the atmosphere in the second photo. For starters, the two boys were further from the camera and slightly tilted, as if the photographer hadn't wanted them to know of their presence. And instead of the playful grin, picture him was curled up next to Jason and clearly fast asleep, his cheek squished against the other's shoulder. Jason in turn, had his arm wrapped around him, gaze soft and a tiny smile on his face as he stared at his phone, seemingly un-bothered by the clinginess of his younger brother which had seemed to be an annoyance in the first photo. 

Talon was entranced. He....he knew that was him. He believed the bats when they told him he'd lived with them for almost two years before becoming a talon and that he'd had another life, a happy life, a _normal_ one. But actually seeing the older version of him was a whole other experience. The photos of him decorating the hallways and public rooms were too formal. The straight back, slicked hair and the black suit uniform he sported in every photo was too prim for him to actually decipher what he was like. It felt as if he was looking at just another blank uniform version of him. One with no real personality other than just following the masses. 

But this....this was personal. This...it showed something, something close and _colourful._ He wondered what the story was behind these events. 

'It was your first Christmas here.' a voice startled him out of his trance and he glanced up to see Tim seated on the floor as well, back resting uncomfortably against the shelf. He was watching him calculatingly, but his eyes danced and his tone was amused as he explained. '7 months or so since you started living with us. Jason hadn't been home for the holidays since he'd...come back but somehow you not only manged to convince him to drop by, but to also get you a gift. It kinda got him the reputation for being a softie and you and I teased him relentlessly.' He smiled softly as a wistful look took over his features. 'You woke everyone up at 4 am and no amount of bribes could get you back in bed, you were too excited for Christmas but you tired yourself enough to take a nap for a while.' He gestured to the second photo, deciding to withhold the memories of Dick's breakdown after dinner when he'd mourned his parents death. It had been an overall happy day and despite the tears at the end of the night, it was one of Tim's fondest memories. 

Talon nodded along to the information, continuing to run his fingers over the glossy photo before fluttering to the edge of the page and hold it, curious to see the rest but unsure if it was acceptable. He looked up at Tim for permission who looked confused for a second or two before he understood what the boy was asking. 'It's your photo album. You don't have to ask for permission to go through it.' leaning forward, he turned the page over before leaning back, observing the photo. 'Huh. I'm not sure when this was taken but judging from Cass's clothing and sweat, it's after one of her dance recitals.' Talon quirked his head, taking in his older sister's brilliant smile and the pretty flowers she seemed to be taking from Dick. He could only see some part of his face, but it was brimming with happiness and pride, the same bright grin he had sported in the previous photo. The only difference was that instead of his hair laying in a floppy manner over his face, it was gelled and brushed back into a stylish quiff. It sweet photo and he wondered where he'd gotten the flowers from. 

The next page didn't hold a proper photo but rather what looked like a magazine cutout and Talon poked at it, causing it to shift behind the plastic cover. Tim leaned forward to get a better look at it and laughed. 'Huh. Demon span always did have a soft spot for you. That's you two walking back from school, you always hated the uniform.' He tapped the photo with his knuckles. 'Demon spawn used to worry that you'd end up getting hit by a car while crossing the road, you were too excitable. Pretty much always held your hand whenever you had to cross roads. I don't remember what magazine this article was from but I remember it being something about brotherly bonding or some of that crap.'

Talon stared at the picture a little longer before excitedly flipping to the next page, eager to see the rest, to catch a glimpse into his old memories. He wished he could remember how these had made him feel. Were these pictures precious memories to him? Did he know all these back stories that Tim was providing him? Did he sit and collect these photos himself or did he have help? He wish he could recall. 

The next photo had him sitting back excitedly and pointing at Tim and the older laughed, a true genuine laugh, heart melting at Dick's child like excitement and familiar joy. 'Yeah bud, that's you and me.' He confirmed, tugging the album closer to him so as to observe the photo. It was a photo of the two of them dressed in suits, Tim holding a sleeping Dick in his arms, clearly immersed in a conversation. 'This was like your fourth gala. You didn't leave with Cass and Damian when they left for patrol because you wanted to wait for desert but....well, let's just say you ended up climbing into Bruce's arms and falling asleep ten minutes later.'

Talon looked confused and pointed at the Tim in the photo as if to say, _that's not Bruce._ 'Yeah, he gave you to me when he got too swamped with....billionaire problems.' 

Talon looked back at the photo, eyes shining as he took in the endearing photo. He began skimming through the pages faster, eager to go through more. There were some solo photos of him as well, one of him holding a giant trophy, one of him standing on what he recognised as one of the staircases in the manor, another of him looking grumpy in a suit. There was a photo of Jason giving him a piggy back ride, another of Tim watching him in the pool, another of Cass, Damian and him sprawled over the dinner table and pouring over numerous books. There were two photos of Alfred wearing a rather ridiculous looking hat, looking disgruntled as Dick watched him with a mischievous grin and another of the butler looking up at him as he hung from the chandelier. It was only until he flipped to the very end of the book did he finally come across photos of Bruce. There was a photo of Bruce wearing a superman shirt and looking down at it grumpiness, a cutout of Dick gripping the older man's hair as he balanced himself on his shoulders. There was also a a lightly blurry photo of Dick curled up in Bruce's side on his bed, both its occupants fast asleep, followed by a Polaroid of them dressed smartly in tux, Bruce's hand on his shoulder. 

Tim provided short explanation for each photo but eventually trailed off into silence, realising dick was now more interested at taking in the photos than the back story, so he chose to sit back and just watch the boy at work, watching how his eyes lit up at each new photo, tracing the jaws and backs of the figures in the picture. It was almost a replica of the old Dick and while Tim had accepted this new version of him, and loved him just as much as he used to, it was always nice to see a shadow of the older him. 

Dick had paused at the last photo of him and Bruce, biting his lip as he went over the photo. He tapped at the face before licking his lips as if to prepare himself and suddenly said, _'Dad....'_

Tim froze, mouth closing and opening as he tried to form words, but shock seemed to take over his speaking abilities. 'Yeah....yeah that's....that's dad. Bruce. Dad.' 

Tim was pretty sure if Bruce was here, he would have gotten that stupid constipated look on his face he always did when he was happy or emotional. Tim wasn't emotionally constipated enough to deny that Bruce was definitely like a father to him, and Tim would sometimes slip and call him dad. He was one of the kids to do it the most often, followed by Cassandra. Tim knew Jason used to call Bruce 'dad' before his death, and now he would sometimes call him that in a sarcastic manner and Damian obviously referred to him as father. But Dick had only called Bruce 'dad' thrice in the past 2 years. The first time had been when he'd been dosed with fear gas for the first time and had been terrified out of his mind. The second time, had been when he's been officially adopted and the third had been yet another life threatening event which had left Dick attached to Bruce's side for quite a while. Of course since coming back, he'd been pretty much mute except for sparing one or two words here and there but he hadn't addressed anyone of them by their names. The fact that he'd chosen _Bruce_ as the first person to address and had actually called him dad was.....a pretty big deal. 

Feeling a twinge of jealousy, he spread out on his stomach and gently plucked the book from Dick's hands and placed it on the floor, the child letting it go without a complain. He flicked back to a previously unseen picture of Jason fast asleep in the cave with a tiara perched on his hair. 'Can you say Jason?' He urged and Talon shifted uncomfortably. Tim knew he shouldn't be pushing the boy but....they couldn't encourage Dick and pull him out of his she'll if they didn't push just a little. 'Come on buddy, it's simple. Ja-s-on.'

Talon hesitated for a split second, considering refusing. But seeing Tim's wide and eager blue eyes made something in him want to try harder. So, bracing himself, he forced his unused vocal box to whisper a small, 'Jay-son.'

It was tougher than he'd expected but the way Tim's eyes lit up made it all worth it. His grin was contagious and Talon felt his own face break into a smile. Tim hastily flipped through the pages till he opened one of Damian on a roller coaster, his eyes wide, hair askew, and mouth open in a scream (though he denied it). 'How about him? You know him right?' 

It was a rhetorical question, of course Talon knew who he was. But that wasn't what Tim was asking so he tried again. 'Damian...'

'Yes! Good job!' he'd forever deny how high his voice got with excitement (Stephanie would never let him live with himself). He flipped to a picture of Cassandra and vocalised her name but at her's, Dick paused. After a minute of contemplation, he settled on 'Cass'. 

Tim will take it. He'll take anything he can get. Flipping to the photo of Alfred in the hat, he waited till Dick managed to pronounce his name before finally pointing at himself, heart pounding loudly in his ears. 'And me?' 

Dick observed him before enunciatiating a small, 'Tim.'

The grin Tim gave him was big enough to cut through his face, and the vigilante had to resist the urge to pull the youngest into a tight hug, knowing that Dick wouldn't like that, at least not yet. Getting the boy to speak out their name was a huge progress in itself. Bruce would be thrilled. 

Now just one last thing to do.

'And you? What's your name?'

The ten year old frowned at him, logically knowing what answer the teen wanted to hear but...it was hard. 'Talo-' 

'Nope.' Tim interrupted, shaking his head. 'No, I know you know the name I'm referring to. You're not Talon or Grayson. So why don't you tell me your real name like you told me the rest of the family's?'

The ten year old shifted and looked down at the floor, voice dropping in a low whisper so that it was barely auditable. 'Dick.'

Tim sighed and reached forward, cradling Dick's cheek in his hand. 'I'm proud of you. You did a good job. And one day, you'll be able to say your name loudly and proudly without feeling any shame or fear.' Tal- Dick stared back at him with wide eyes and despite all his precautions, he leant into the comforting touch. 'And we'll be by your side till that occurs. But for now, it's three AM, and way past your bed time, so let's get you tucked back in, yeah?'

He startled and looked around, realising with a startle that the storm had slowed down and he hadn't even noticed. He slowly got to his feet, noting with a start that his legs were asleep but in a matter of mere seconds, the aches were gone, his enhanced body being too advanced to succumb to such mere pain for long. Tim was already pulling the blankets back and was gesturing for him to come over. Talon clambered in, looking nervously around his room as Tim gently pushed at his shoulder to make him lie down. Running a hand through his hair lovingly. 'Night, Dickie.'

Tim took to leaving but stopped when thin fingers wrapped around his sleeve again. Looking back over his shoulder, he was taken aback by Dick's big sad eyes. No transition could take away the power of Richard Grayson's legendary puppy eyes. He perched on the edge of the bed, rubbing the kid's shoulder. 'What's wrong?' 

Dick's eyes darted around the room, reproachful and wide eyed. 'Do you want me to stay?' 

Dick's responding look could only be described as a non verbal request of, _would you?_

Tim smiled and leant back, resting his head on his hand. 'Or course I will. Bruce and the others should be back soon, but you should try to go to sleep before they do.' He reached up with his left hand to ruffle Dick's hair resisting the urge to leave his hand there. 'Don't worry, I'll stay till you fall asleep. No one's going to hurt you again, not on my watch.'

Dick relaxed into the pillow and- deciding to push himself more then he'd done in the past hour- and shuffled down so that his head was under Tim's hand. The hand tensed just long enough to make Talon panic but a second later, it began running softly through his hair, fingers twisting in his hair and nails scratching gently at the scalp until, despite himself, he slipped into a somewhat deep slumber, feeling....feeling....

_Feeling safe._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to be clear, Dick was experiencing hallucinations and talons were not really there. 
> 
> Thank you for the support you showed at the last chapter. It genuinely means so much :-) And it really motivates me to work on the next chapter. 
> 
> I don't know how I'm doing really, I've never written the bat family siblings or read much about them. But I think I kinda got Tim? I think I may have made him a little too soft but they're suppose to be soft at least for now? I'd love some feedback on if I git his character somewhat right?


	3. Relapse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: anxiety attack

The taps of tall heels and the clinking of champagne glasses mixed pleasantly with the low hum of conversation and the melodic music drifting from the band in the corner. Pearls and expensive diamonds shined in the bright chandelier light as important men and women exchanged pleasantries, well hidden jabs, and flirteous jokes. 

High society galas were always the same. 

Except in this one, Talon was not running around between them. No, he was safely tucked up upstairs, hidden from prying and hurtful eyes. Bruce had tucked him into bed earlier than usual with a promise to check up on him as soon as the gala had finished. 

Talon had tried to go to sleep, he really had. But he felt too energetic and the soft lull of music was attracting him like a moth to a flame. So after some hesitancy, he'd climbed out of bed and shrugged on some soft slippers to muffle his foot steps. He tucked his wings behind him and flattened them against his back as he pulled on a thin night robe, leaving it open as tying it up would only cause his wings to cut into his back uncomfortably. 

Talon pulled his bedroom door open and crept outside, tiptoeing down the hall towards the music and the chatter. He stopped at the banister and walked over to one of the chairs and climbing into it so that he could peek over the banister without being too close to it, not wanting anyone to look up and spot him. His family had made it clear that he should not be anywhere near the guests for his own safety. He was slowly growing more comfortable with testing their boundaries, thus the sneaking out of bed, but he didn't want to push it. 

Sitting on his knees, he looked down at the gala and froze. There were so many....people. Since coming back from the court, he'd only been in the company of his family and a handful of their allies and friends. He still wasn't comfortable enough around all of them and this...this was definitely pushing it. He was a whole floor above then and well hidden in the shadows, yet he was already feeling smothered. 

Maybe he should go back to his room. He didn't want to get in trouble and staying here was just making him anxious.

But he couldn't make himself move. 

He watched the guests slink around each other and....suddenly he was back in the court. Terrifying images flashed before him, of his first two weeks in the court, scared out of his wits and being stared down by an army of oppressors, dressed in expensive tuxes and beautiful dresses, face hidden behind the blank owl masks. Suddenly, he was chained down and screaming in pain, calling for his family as pain lashed though him, cold laughter echoing in his ears and mingling with his screams. 

A chorus of loud laughs bounced through the walls and Talon felt his feet grow cold. 

_Not again. He couldn't go back. Never again._

His wings struggled to free themselves of the robe, his terrified mind mistaking it as the bounds they had grown so accustomed to in the court. He hurried to chuck it off and squirmed until he'd freed themselves, his wings shooting out straight and knocking against one of the expensive lamps. It tipped off the decorative table and clattered to the floor loudly, the _crash_ causing his breath to catch in his throat. 

No no no. The court _hated_ loud noises and oh god oh god - 

He shot to his feet and took off running down the hall, making sure to stick to the shadows as he'd been taught by the court. His frazzled mind humoured at the irony, using the court's own teachings against them. 

Terror gripped him tighter as he picked up the sound of thundering feet following him.

_Chasing him._

_They're trying to take me back._

He had to shake them off. There was no way they knew the pathway of this Manor as well as he did. He could still lose them. 

That is if his 'family' hadn't betrayed him and given them a helping hand. Hurt twinged at him as he rushed through the halls, fighting the urge to look back and check how close they were. How could they do this to him? He hadn't seen any of them downstairs. Had they gotten sick of him and given his location away to get him out of the way? He'd finally started trusting them, started opening himself up to them, started indulging the idea of even _loving them_ and they'd-

Hands grabbed him and jerked him out of his thoughts and Talon's eyes widened as he was lifted up and entrapped. No, no no-

He threw his head back against the shoulder of his captor and _screamed,_ scratching desperately at the clothed arms wrapped around his stomach. He could hear his captor yelling above his shrill screams but in his haze of panic and fear, he couldn't make anything out. It didn't matter anyway, they were probably calling out orders to the other Talons and owls-

More hands grabbed at him and his wrists were caught and tightly held and all logic and preservative of calm flew out the window. He kicked his legs in the air, pulling his arm back and lunged it forward, knocking his fist against something strong and hard. He heard a yelp of pain and something wet hitting his knuckles but he didn't have time to ponder on what as he jerked his head back and knocked against his jailer's head. The grip on him loosened and he felt his heart lift as he dug his nails into the arms, wings struggling to puff out to their full length. 

As soon as they'd loosened, they grew firm again and he heard quick orders and yells and then he was being dragged into a spare guest room he'd never been in, or at least one he couldn't remember being in. 

No, no, no it was happening again. He could almost smell the metallic smell of blood that had accompanied the labyrinth where he'd been trapped in back at the court-

But instead of being strapped on to the cot, he was sat on someone's lap but the arms didn't loosen at all. That confused Talon. What was their plan now? Was this a new tactic to break him down? Offer him comfort and touches before snatching it all away and mocking him with what he couldn't have? Wouldn't be the first time they did it. 

He wouldn't give in to it this time. He wouldn't break. He threw his head back and continued screaming, his shrill pain filled screams slowly dissolving in to desperate sobs as he worked to fruitlessly free himself. 

'N-n-no! No-'

'Ssh Kid. It's okay, you're okay. You're safe, no one's going to hurt you.'

Talon shook his head and continued to scream, scratching desperately at the shoulders and neck of whoever's holding him. 

His struggling was cut short by a hand on the back of his head and it was pulled into the safe concave of someone's neck and shoulders. Some part of him realised that he was being rocked and that there were three hands in him instead of the regular two, which confused him. Had the court developed a new type of horror with three hands during the time he'd been away?

'It's alright Dickie. I'm here.' 

And like a fog being lifted, the voice finally clicked in his head as he registered who his 'captor' was. 

_Jason._

A wave of emotions crashed over him, so strong that he didn't know which one to focus on. He was still scared, still shaken up but he was happy, cold, he was-

He was _relieved._

Slowly relaxing his tense shoulders, he clasped the expensive suit jacket in his fits and burrowed his face in his older brother's shoulders as he broke down, sobbing harder than he could ever recall himself doing so. A gentle hand entangled it self in his hair as another rubbed his back, the soft rocking and warmth from Jason's body bringing him down from his terrified haze.

He didn't know how long he sat there, crying his heart out into his brother's chest, feeling the gentle sweeps through his hair and the reassuring pats on his bare back. His wings slowly drooped to his side, relaxing as his mind finally recognised the safety he was engulfed in. It occurred to him that he hadn't...cried like this since he'd been bought back to the manor. He'd cried hysterically after their evaluation but had been too uncomfortable to succumb to tears since then, unsure if they'd be received with the same kindness they had been before. Certainly, the court had never indulged his tears, receiving them with repulse and dishing out severe punishments for them. 

Talon suppose he should have held himself back, he had just attacked them-

Oh god. 

Oh god oh god oh god-

He'd attacked his brothers. 

A different kind of panic gripped him now, one that grew from numb to overwhelmingly horrible, his breaths growing shorter and shorter till he couldn't think straight, water rushing to his ears until he couldn't hear anything else, just the cold tentacles of-

The shushes and reassurances fell on deaf ears and the young talon was starting to feel a little faint when he felt a sudden pinch to his arm. He pulled his head away to get in some more air and he looks down at his arm, narrowing down on the syringe injecting some form of drug into him. He blinked hazily and looked away from it to the owner of the hand, coming face to face with Damian. His third brother didn't meet his eye as he continued to inject the drug and Dick's hearing seemed to become blocked with cotton as his vision grew black. The next thing he knew, he was lilting forward and slipping into unconsciousness, cheek resting against his oldest brother's shoulder. 

Jason watched in relief as the boy curled up against him and fell asleep. He hadn't thought Talons were capable of a panic attack and seeing Dick growing dizzy from lack of oxygen had been terrifying. 

He unconsciously tugged the boy close as he looked up at his second youngest brother. 'What you give him?' 

'High dosage of Zaleplon.' He reported, eyes trained on Dick as he wiped the blood from his mouth where the Talon had punched him in his fit of panic. 

'You just....carry that around with you?'

'Tt. This is hardly the time to punish us with your idiotic questions. Drake bought it with him.'

'Drake?' Jason blinked in surprise. He startled slightly as Tim hurried back, his hair dishevelled and his tie askew. 'Tim? When the fuck did you get here?' 

'Saw you and demon running upstairs after the crash. And you caused a racket when you were trying to subdue him so I figured I'd bring some reinforcements. Plus, the guests were getting curious so I told them that it was probably some animal that broke in and needed our help.' He paused and looked over at his brothers. 'Kid really did a number on you huh? Did he break any bones?' 

'Nah. It was a blunt hit but the bone's intact- wait, did you say you gave him Zaleplon? That's not suitable for him, he's ten!'

'His body and metabolism is too fast for a regular sleeping drug. Even this one won't keep him under influence for long, he'll probably wake up in two hours or so.' 

'How can you be sure? We can't just trust your words, Drake.'

'Oh? And why not?'

'With your lack of skills and emotional intelligence, I do not think it's appropriate to put Richard's health in your hands.'

'What the hell does emotional intelligence have anything to do with this?'

'Not much but it is worth mentioning.'

'You're one to speak about emotional intelligence, you little booger.'

'Childish name calling. Tt, you just proved my poin-'

'Okay, you shrimps continue this, I'm going to go tuck him back in bed. Once you're done being idiots, tell Bruce everything's okay, that I'm staying with Dick and that I _told_ him that having a gala two and a half months since having him back was a bad idea.'

'Excuse me, why do you get to stay with him?' Damian demands, angrily flushing. 

'Because I didn't want to come to this stupid gala anyway and he's already sleeping on top of me so why not?'

'Okay, no. That's not happening. You are not leaving me downstairs to deal with those old dustbags by myself, they'll smolder me.' Tim argued. 'Here's what's going to happen. You're going to set Dick back in bed and Damian will stay with him-'

'For once, you have used your intelligence and come up with a passable plan-' 

'Save it, you little twerp. Jason, you're going to clean up and change into a new clean shirt and come back downstairs with me-'

'-Woah woah, what's with the favouritism Timbers?'

'-because what the hell am I suppose to tell the guests? My 21 year old brother isn't coming downstairs, he has a strict bed time? No one's going to believe that and besides, it's not going to be enough to keep your army of female admirers away-'

'-Todd has female admirers? Why?'

'Maybe because I'm over five feet tall and don't sound like a high chipmunk, brat.'

'No, you just sound like a dead bullfrog.'

'You little-'

'Anyway! Not many people will question Damian having a bed time. He's like twelve.'

'I am fifteen, you imbecile!' 

'And I'm eighteen. Its more applicable to you than to us.' He nodded at Jason and sighed, running his fingers through his long hair. 

'Tt. You fall asleep anywhere you sit down and have already dozed off twice tonight. If anyone is applicable to a bed time, it is you.'

'Yeah well, I'm choosing you for a bed time. And it's not like I'm actually forcing you to bed, you just have to hang around with Dick. So suck it up and quit arguing, will Ya?'

Damian opened his mouth to do just what Tim had asked not to do, but was cut off by Jason's sigh. 'As much as I hate to agree with you, you make solid arguments. Demon, go clean up. I'm going to go tuck him in bed and change.'

Damian threw Tim a look of dislike before sighing. 'Fine.' He huffed and stomped off. Tim watched him leave and then followed Jason out of the room, separating from him to go into Bruce's room. He pulled out a spare white shirt and checked it at the older as Jason pulled the blanket over Dick's tiny form. He chucked it at him along with a box of tissues, the oldest catching it easily and wiping his nose on several papers of tissue. He winced as he dabbed at it. 'Dammit, the kid's strong.'

'Maybe you're just a delicate little flower.'

'I'll slam your face into the ground.'

'That kinda talk doesn't suit you, flower boy.' Tim deadpanned before grunting as he was elbowed out of the way, Damian stalking into the room in clean pyjamas and three juice boxes. He planted himself gingerly on the edge of Dick's bed, brushing the feathers of his wings as he did so. 'Do you have no manners?' 

'Not for low lives like you.'

'Woah, hey that's no way to talk to someone of Tim's intelligence.' Jason interrupted, as he pulled his shirt off and the clean one on. 'Did you thank him for his kind compliment, Timbers?' 

Tim shared a devilish grin with his older brother as Damian scrunched his nose at them. 'What are you idiots talking about?' 

'It's alright, little Damian. Can't say I was totally surprised.'

'What on _earth_ are you talking about? I never called you intelligent.' Damian argued back haughtily. 

'You said I used my intelligence only a few minutes ago. That directly implies that you think I am, in fact, intelligent.'

Damian's face fell into what could only be described as horror. 'I....I did not! What I meant was-' 

'Aww, it's okay Demon. We know you look up to us.' Jason teased, giving a lopsided grin as his brother flushed a deep pink. 

_'Look up?_ To you? Never! I-' 

'Oh come on Jay, you're embarrassing the poor kid. Don't make him cry.'

'I will slice your neck open!'

'Save that thought. We should get back before people get too suspicious.' Jason interrupted, shrugging his coat back on. 'Come get one of us if he freaks out again.'

With that, the eldest brothers left the room, closing the door softly behind him, falling into quick whispers over what could _possibly_ have set the kid off so badly. Damian listened to your footsteps go and sighed as he pulled his feet off the ground to cross them, back straight as he punched the straw into the juice box and began to drink it. He sipped the apple juice as he watched over his brother, the moonlight bouncing off the bronze feathers of the boy's wings. 

Damian let his mind wander, thinking of anything random he could as the the time passed by and was actually getting pretty sleepy by the time Dick started shuffling around. He sat up straight and decked the empty juice box into the trash can, smirking as it plopped into the bin. His aim was definitely getting better and he could make Drake eat his words the next time they practiced.

Damian waited till Dick's yellow eyes had fluttered open before saying, 'Richard? Are you awake?' 

The ten year old blinked slowly as he came to bearing with his surroundings. Damian continued watching him carefully and as he had suspected, the more aware he became, the more panicked he grew. Dick slowly sat up and his hear shrivelled from side to side, clearly looking for a way to escape but that couldn't happen. So Damian reached forward to grasp the boy's knee, staring back passively when he flinched at the touch. 

'How are you feeling, Richard?'

The boy didn't answer. He had stopped shuffling around but he didn't look any more lax, remaining stiff as a board. 

'Why did you leave your bed? I thought Father tucked you in so that you wouldn't be unnerved by the hoards of guests.'

Though his words had not been spoken with the intention of telling the boy off, Richard still shrunk away, eyes wide and so terrified as his wings curled up around him, something the family had long since picked up as an anxious trait. Damian's frown deepened as he watched the Talon grew visibly more distressed. 

'I am not upset with you. I am merely curious and confused.' when his words didn't seem to dull any of his fears, he tried again, repeating the words that they'd all but drilled into the boy. 'It is alright, Richard. You're safe. Do you remember what happened? I would like to know what had you shaken up so bad.'

Again, Richard merely stared at him before shrugging his hand off and pulling his legs close to his chest. He ducked his head behind his knees so that only his eyes were peeking out at Damian, his tousled hair flopping lazily over his eyes. 

Damian half heartedly pulled his hand away. He couldn't recall the last time he'd been the one who had initiated skin ship, especially with the youngest bat. Before his capture, Damian had become accustomed to sudden bear hugs and a tiny body leaping onto his back, Richard demanding for attention and touches every chance he got. He'd quite started to enjoy trying to shake the boy off, even as he held his nose up high as he refused to give into the boy's hugs. He'd never thought there would be a time where he would actually miss it. 

Damian took in the taught body and the way his younger brother tried to curl in on himself and he hates the fact that he could relate. He knew what the boy was going through. At least partly. 

Perhaps....perhaps Richard would come out of his shell if he could connect with someone who had even a pinch of understanding of his mindset, rather then empty reassurances. 

He internally grimaced. God damn it, he hated being so vulnerable. 

But it's okay. It was for Richard. His little brother. If there was anyone Damian was soft for, it was him. 

'I do not know if you remember this....but I was raised by the league of assassins. And they were....not very affectionate. Their methods mirrored those of the court. But the court was more brutal.' He grimaced as he admitted that. His mother and grandfather may have been harsh and abusive (something which had taken him a long time to accept) but at least they had never modified his body or done something as cruel as _setting him on fire_ . They had burnt some part of his body as punishments but he didn't think mentioning that to the younger boy would do him much good. 

Talon perked his head up a little, tilting it to the side. There was a.... _distant_ memory in his head. He had a feeling he _had_ known that. But the memory, much like all the others, was vivid and foggy and made this information feel....new.

The silence stretched a bit before Damian decided to continue. 'The league....they had impossible standards. I was trained from birth to kill, trained to be the perfect assassin and the sharpest weapon.' 

Talon grimaced at that. _Sounds familiar._ He didn't dare to say that out loud though. 

'Their methods were not....humane. Their training was intense and brutal and their punishments were unfair and harsh. And for the longest time....I didn't question it. I truly believed their methods as progressive and normal. They brain washed me into believing that every punishment was meritorious and their teachings were the way of a balanced life. And it wasn't till I was sent here that I realised how....wrong they were.'

Damian paused, averting his eyes from his brother to punch into his next juice box. He had never liked appearing so vulnerable in front of his family and even after years of living with them, it didn't get easier. 

'At first, I was confused too. By the change of atmosphere. I suspected every small action was a test, like the unlimited food I was offered, the supposedly innocent time passing gadgets. I assumed they wanted me to act as my mother did, as a good soldier, born to fight and lead. I was....wary of messing up. Whenever I did, I awaited a punishment and was confused when all I received was a berating and something as measly as a grounding. I couldn't bring myself to believe that it was going to be that easy.' He paused and looked at his brother thoughtfully. 'I know you can understand that.' 

Talon's shoulders tensed at the words but it didn't seem like a jab. Damian spoke in quite a monotone way but it just didn't seem as if he had said it with malicious intent. He continues to listen attentively, heart twisting in sympathy as he listened to his brother. 

'It never crossed my mind that Father and his strays had no hidden agenda. Not for a long time. No matter how many times they assured me that I was not being tested or in danger, I couldn't bring myself to believe them. Until.... I did. It took time. Quite a number of months. I am....not sure at what point I started to believe them and trust them but I finally accepted that they were not....like the people who I had been raised with. I finally accepted that I did not have to fight to earn my place in the family and that the principles and morals I had been raised on were not correct. At least not one a hero should be following.' 

Talon listened carefully, confused as to why the older boy was sharing this with him. 

'After that, I began to indulge in actions that I had previously seen as below me. I took to hobbies and friends and having personal preferences in mundane things, such as food and music. I became less cautious of sharing opinions on subjects not connected to fighting and missions. I became more comfortable and realised that I didn't have to be an emotionless weapon raised to be the perfect heir. That it was okay to be....myself.' He had to bite down on his tongue to stop himself from shuddering. God, emotions are difficult. 

When he looked back at his brother, Dick had straightened slightly and his body was not as coiled as before. Good, his body language suggested that he was opening up a little. He bit the inside of his cheek and forced himself to continue, glad that his words were actually getting through to the boy. He decided to extend another branch and held out the last juice box to the younger boy who coiled away as Damian approached but the fifteen year old didn't pull away, keeping his arm extended until Dick eventually reached forward and grasped it. He seemed taken aback by the weight of the tiny box as his hand dropped down and he tilted his head, turning the box in all directions. He swiped a thumb over the logo, sweeping the drops of condensation away as well. 

'You can drink it. I bought it for you. You....you were always fond of mango juice. I thought you might like to try it again.' Damian nodded at the straw poking out from the box. 'You take a sip from that and....just try it.'

Talon looked over at him skeptically, but he instead skipped over his brother to the box he was holding. If Damian had been drinking from the juice box, there was no way his own was poisoned right? 

He lifted the straw to his mouth and wrapped his lips around it and sipped, his body remembering the mechanical action. Immediacy, yellow liquid spurred up as his eyes widened as the falsely sweetened fluid burst into his mouth and he couldn't stop himself from letting out a happy noise as he eagerly swallowed it and continued to gulp, enjoying the flavour. He let out a surprised noise as the box started to shrivel up and his brows furrowed as the juice stopped flowing. He pulled it away and shook it slightly, disappointed and confused. 

'It's finished.' Damian called and Talon startled, having forgotten for a split second that he had not been alone. He must have looked quite sad because Damian's brows raised and he held his own box out to him. 'You can drink mine if you want but you were never particularly liked the flavour of grape.' Even before he finished, Talon was shaking his head. He couldn't take Damian's possession. He'd already taken one of it and a part of him was already beginning to regret it. 

Silence fell over them again until Damian finally continued. 'I....do not want to alarm you with all this information. It is just to reassure you that you are not alone. I might not truly understand what you went through but I do understand your way of thinking. And so does Cain. She is one of the only practical sibling we share and she is sensible. But she started out like you. I was not present when she first started living with father but she was not as comfortable as she is now. She, like myself, learnt to accept this new way of ''family'' and to accept that Father had no hidden agendas and that he was not going to suddenly lash out and flip into having a harsher persona.I just want you to realise that when we say that you are safe and that your opinions and words are valid and important....we mean it.'

Talon....knew that. Some part of him, deep down, was aware of that. In the three months he'd been home, his family had been nothing but genuinely kind with him. They'd reassured him time after time that he was safe, to the point that he'd managed to break out of his shell a little. He'd stopped hiding away in his room, stopped flinching away from gentle head rubs and pats, stopped questioning every object he'd been offered, had even started voicing his thoughts aloud. He still hadn't reached the point of speaking properly and having full in length conversations with them but he could share his thoughts in broken sentences and short words. But then something like _this_ always happened. Something miniscule and _ordinary_ that sent him into a wave of panic and ten steps back in his progress. 

It was frustrating. Especially when his family had to sit and repeat the same phrases and reassurances again and again. 

He thought about what his brother had said. That Cassandra and him had come from a horrible back ground too. He hasn't mentioned Jason or Tim, so does that mean his oldest brothers came from a happy background? But if they did, why were they living with Bruce? No one in the family came from an easy life. He wondered what their story was. Can he ask Damian? Or was that too imposing? 

He decided not to do so. Perhaps the older vigilantes did not want their stories shared with Talon. He should respect that. After all, they had respected his boundaries from the start. He should return the favour. 

But....they all seemed okay now. Not perfect. Talon couldn't really give examples what a normal happy being would act like but they were not as strange as Talon. They usually got along, they had strong opinions and most of all, they were good people who didn't shrink away from everything. 

They were not....freaks. Not like him. 

He opened his mouth to share that thought. To tell his brother that he thought he was brave to not let his trauma take over him, to move on. But all that came out was, 'I....not.'

Damian scrunched his nose, confused. 'Not?' 

Talon struggled with his words, wondering what was the best way to word what he felt. But....he wasn't sure what he felt. And stating that required the usage of a lot more words then he was comfortable with saying. So he shrugged again and repeated, 'Not.'

Damian closed his eyes but was careful to not sigh or give away any indication that might make Dick conclude that he was annoyed. He wasn't. He was....upset. Just upset. He wished he could help the boy more than just repeating overused phrases. Wish he could help him back to the older version of Dick who would laugh loudly, would blurt his opinions and feelings out with no shame, who would attack anyone he could with a tight hug. Damian would almost always know what his brother was thinking and now.... 

Now all he had to go on was a simple word. And unfortunately, he was not good at deciphering emotions. So he sighed softly and nodded. 'Okay.' He whispered softly, heart sinking at Dick's shoulders dropped. 

_At least he's not scared now._

Damian still didn't know _why_ Richard had freaked out less than three hours ago. He opened his mouth to question the boy again but was interrupted by the door opening and he raised a brow as his father stepped in. Next to him, Dick tensed just a bit but not enough to call the attention of the two vigilantes. 

'Father.' He greeted, pressing the straw of his forgotten juice bow to the side of his lips. 'How did the gala go?' 

'Ordinary.' the man replied, loosening his bow tie as he stepped into the room. Damian noted that he was no longer wearing his stiff black suit jacket. His attention shifted from his son to the youngest boy, who was watching him carefully. Clearing his throat, he pulled an empty chair next to Dick's bed and sitting down. 'You should go get ready for patrol. Tim and Cassandra are going to leave soon.'

Damian nodded, perking up. After the exhausting night of having to listen to stiff old hags talk about trash gossip and elderly woman cooing over how handsome and tall he'd gotten, punching the crap out of bad guys seemed like a good stress relief. He squeezed Dick's knee gently before pulling away, squaring his shoulders back and nodding at his father. 'Will you be joining us?' 

The man turned to observe his youngest, who stared at his hands nervously. 'It depends on how this goes. I trust you and your siblings can handle the situation without me.'

Damian nodded, smirking at his father. 'I shall inform Drake and Cain that I shall be driving the bat mobile.'

'You shall do no such thing. Let your brother drive.'

'Tt. Unfortunately father you shall not be there to observe us.' He turned on his heel and strutted out of the room. 'And I know you are aware that I am a better driver then the rest of these wannabes.'

'Do not call them that.' Bruce grumbled, even as his lips pulled upwards into a small amused smile. 

'Pennyworth always told us that honesty is the best policy.'

'So is respect.'

'I shall respect Drake when he comes up with a less laughable costume.'

'Hmm. And Cassandra?' Bruce asked, knowing the boy would not dare to insult his older sister. Like he'd suspected Damian paused and gave him a blank look over his shoulder. 'She's acceptable.' With that compliment, the door was shut, leaving father and son alone. 

Bruce sighed and turned back to his youngest, who was staring down at his hands, looking small and ashamed. He noticed the shrivelled juice box clutched in the boy's hands and raised a brow. Dick didn't need to eat as much as a normal ten year old but it was important for him to have at least some nutrients, eat a few times a week and drink some amount of water. But junk food was not something Dick had indulged in since being back. Despite recalling how aghast Alfred had been at the boy's eating habits, he couldn't help but be glad that he had yielded back to his old style. It was somewhat....normal. 

What was not normal was the panic attack the boy had had merely a few hours ago. 

Bruce broke the silence first. 'How are you feeling?' 

Instead of answering, Dick shifted and peeked up at him, yellow eyes looking timid and fearful rather then the viciousness they were suppose to represent. 

Talon shrugged and licked his lip, gathering courage to say, '..sorry...' 

Bruce raised his brow, knowing what the boy was apologising for. But that was not what he had come in here for. 'Thank you for apologising. But I am more concerned with your actions.' At the boy's frightened look, he hastened to add, 'I am not upset with you. Just worried. I just want to know why you were out of bed in the first place.'

Dick licked his lips, shoulders drooped and pinching the end of his left wing. He shrugged. He truly could not recall why he had thought that leaving the safe hallow of his bed had been a good idea. All he could remember was that he was not sleepy. 

Bruce however, seemed to already have the answer, or at least one part of it. 'I assume it was relevant to your bed time. I usually put you to bed by ten thirty but I tucked you in at seven thirty today. I suppose it was idiotic to think that you would have tired yourself to the point of falling asleep so early.'

Talon nodded quietly. He found it hard to sleep on normal days anyway and the only reason he dutifully went to bed was because of how insistent his family was of reinforcing a proper sleeping schedule in him. That, and because bed time was usually accompanied by Bruce tucking him in. It was really one of the only form of interaction the two had. Bruce was.....a busy man. With his highlander duties as well as civilian duties, he was barely home and when he was, he was swamped with guests and his other children. There weren't many words shared amongst them but Talon didn't really mind. He was....warm. That was the best way he could describe his guardian. The man made him feel safe and his gentle touches, though rare, were always so loving and tender. Talon felt safe around him, protected even. There was another form of closeness he shared with the dark Knight, one that he was still trying to gain access back to. But even if he wasn't glued to his side 24/7, Bruce still seemed to know what Dick was thinking without having to question him about it. 

'The only reason I ushered you to bed so early was so that you could avoid the crowd. I had a feeling that you would not react kindly to them.' He observed Dick for a moment and his silence seemed to to verbally say, _I was right,_ If Talons could flush, he'd be Bright red right now. 'Jason was adamant that we push this gala further until you were more comfortable. He was pretty happy about the fact that he had been right.' the man grumbled, his words lacking much heat. 

At his older brother's name, Dick's eyes widened as he suddenly remembered the injuries he'd dished while in his fit of panic. Damian had looked alright and he had all but forgotten but he hadn't seen the oldest bat since his panic attack. What if the man was badly hurt? 

'...Jason?'

'Left for his own apartment a while before the gala happened. He's fine, so don't worry about it.' He reassured and rolled his shoulder back. Silence fell over them and Bruce looked like he was expecting Dick to drift back off. But Talon was too preoccupied with mulling over Damian's tale. 'Damian.....hurt.' He recounted, wanting his guardian to be aware of Damian's pain, to confirm that Damian was alright and that his claims were correct. That eventually, the fear and panic would slide away and he'd finally be comfortable, be _normal._

'Damian's hurt? You hit him too?' At Dick's shameful head duck, he hastened to add, 'I....I didn't mean to chastise you. I'm just worried, he shouldn't be going on patrol if he's injured.'

'No. Before.' 

Bruce was growing slightly frustrated but he couldn't let that be shown, so he leant back in his chair and pondered over his words. Before? What before? He knew the whole family had tried their utmost best to not show up on front of Dick when they were battered up and injured, Damian most of all. So what 'before' could Dick have been talking about? Could he be referring to the time when Damian had been with the league? It seemed like the only possible option. 

'Are you referring to when he was in the leagues?' He cautiously asked and blinked in surprise when the boy nodded. 'How on earth do you know about that?' They had realised Dick didn't remember much of their back story, only aware of their vigilante activities without knowing the reason why they'd pushed themselves to become one. 

Dick shrugged and pointed to the closed door and then to the juice box in his hand. 'Oh....he told you?' 

Talon nodded before asking, 'Okay?' 

'Is it okay that he told you?'

He shook his head in disapproval, before trying to explain with his limited vocabulary. 'Okay- Talon.'

'Dick.' the older corrected firmly, shaking his head. 'Do not call yourself Talon.' He waited till the boy gave him a hesitant nod before letting himself ponder over his question. He wasn't....a hundred percent sure what the boy was asking so he decided to answer from all aspects of it. 

'Damian wasn't okay. Nome of us really were. And it took time but everyone's in a happier place now. And you will be too one day.' He promised, leaning forward to tweak the empty box from Dick's hand and placing it on the bedside table. 'I know you're going to relapse sometimes. You're going to have bad days and good days. Today was just a bad day. It wasn't easy but you got through it and I'm not surprised. You're one of the strongest kid I know.'

Talon felt his heart squeeze in pride, not exactly knowing why the words caused him to feel so uplifted and happy. His family made it a point to only speak kind and supportive words to him but he had a feeling that words expressing his father's pride didn't come easy even before the court. He gave the older a shy smile which was replicated by his guardian. 

'Don't feel bad about today. I.....apologise for not being more cautious of your reaction to the large crowd but that won't be a problem anymore. You can take as much time as you want. We.....we shall be here to get you through the tough days.'

'Why?' He questioned, unable to help himself. He couldn't understand this....unlimited love and support. Going back on progress in the court was unheard of and if Talon had to be told twice of something, it was accompanied with brash words and harsh schemes, ones that messed with him physically and emotionally. Nothing came without a price. Yet here.... 

'Because....we're your family Dick. That's what families do. No matter what clashes or fights happen or how many setbacks we have, we don't give up on each other. That's just how it works.'

Dick stared at him blankly and Bruce really did let out an upset sigh now. He suppose it was too much to hope for Dick to accept his words without any doubts. He ran a hand through his hair and stood up, reaching forward to squeeze his shoulder before he left. 'It's okay, we don't have to delve into that now. Go to sleep chum, I'll see you in the morning.'

He had barely lifted his foot before he startled, years of training being the only thing that helped him reign in a shocked yelp. Thin but surprisingly strong arms wrapped around his stomach and he looked down in surprise, only to see his youngest leaning forward in his bed and nuzzling his head against the vigilante's stomach, curled up into a hug. For a second, his brain short circuited, (he could almost hear Jason's jabbing comment on how this wasn't new) but slowly, he raised his arms to circle them around his son, hugging him back, reminiscing the times his boy would throw himself into his arms at random moments, looking for any excuse for a hug. This was far from the violent and sudden surprise hugs he usually indulged in but god, it was a huge step forward for this new version of Dick. And if his eyes stung slightly with tears of relief, he didn't let them fall. 

Bruce rubbed a hand through Dick's raven hair, fingers twisting in the dark locks. For the umpteenth time he wondered what he'd done to get so lucky to be blessed with such wonderful children. Dick was the last of his kids (he'd sworn up and down that he was done after him) but that didn't make him any less special. He had a connection with the boy, one that he shared with no one else, both having lost their parents in a tragic manner (not that Dick could really remember it) and despite the horrible circumstances, it created an unbreakable bond. He loved all his kids equally, no matter what his kids said. But there was no denying he had a soft spot for Dick, something the kid had taken full advantage of before his transformation. He had thought that he couldn't love the child more then he already did. 

Turns out he was wrong. Because in this very instant, Dick Grayson had warmed his way deeper into Bruce's heart and had jammed himself tightly in there. And it seemed he was never leaving. 

That was fine. That was more then fine. If Bruce had it his way, (and he was going to God damn make sure he did) he'd make sure that Dick never left the safe walls of the manor again. As far as he was concerned, no one would lay another hand on his boy ever again for ad long as he lived. 

And Dick was more then okay with staying with this family. This family of wonderfully confusing people, who spoke kindly and offered unlimited forgiveness. 

Who loved him unconditionally. 

Who swore to always love him unconditionally. 

Dick....Dick would like to see them honour they promise, so he didn't mind sticking around with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise if this chapter wasn't as focused on Damian as I would like. He's a difficult character for me to write and I only became accustomed with him a month or so ago. Still getting the hang of his personality (the real one, not the shitty crap the writers keep making up) 
> 
> Thank you for all your kind comments. They're truly so motivating and encouraging and I look forward to them. Do tell me what you think of this chapter too. 
> 
> Next chapter will be up soon hopefully.


	4. Flicker of a light

Dick's breath fogged the glass as his eyes followed the several thick droplets racing down the window, watching how they meshed together at the bottom of the panel. His eyes darted back up to the sky, the view growing more and more blurry as the water plastered itself to the glass. His toes curled into the carpet in quiet excitement as the rain thickened just a bit and his wings shivered behind him as his fingers pressed against the clean glass, definitely leaving smudges on it. He paused and observed the drizzle carefully, relieved to see the lack of thunder and lightening. 

His eyes were drawn to the trees whose leaves fluttered delicately at the light wind and Dick felt his heart squeeze with an urge he couldn't _quite_ explain. Watching the rain drizzle down and coat the outside in refreshingly cold water made him feel _trapped_ in an uncommon way. It wasn't like the confinement he had faced in the court when he'd been locked in his coffin or in the labyrinth or like the times he'd been restrained. It was much lighter then that but he felt a deep itch underneath his skin to _get out_ and _experience_ it. It felt foolish to stay inside all warm and dry when he could be outside, soaked under the heavenly rain. 

Transfixed, he reached up and undid the latch and gently pushed the window open, a small grin tugging at his lips as a cold and pleasant breeze ruffled his hair and blew small droplets on his face. Drawn to the outside, he chambered on to the ledge and balanced on his heels before making a small leap so as to land on the grass rather then on the bushes which lay right beneath the window. He let out a soft 'Oh' when he was out in the open, the droplets now hitting his bare shoulders and arms, running down his face and slowly soaking the feathers on his wings. Turning to the window, he flapped his wings aggressively, sending droplets everywhere as he managed to pull himself off the ground by a few inches. He quickly shut the window so as not to let the water get into the house. He had a feeling the nice elderly man that took care of them wouldn't approve of that and Dick didn't want to take advantage of his niceness. 

Once he was sure the opening was tightly sealed, he dropped back into the grass, keening happily as his abrupt landing caused the wet grass to squelch against his toes. He perked his wings up so that they would not dip into the muddy ground as he wandered around the huge gardens, something he hadn't indulged in much since his return to the manor. He'd learnt quite quickly that his family was a huge deal and had people out to _hurt_ them or get dirt on them for their own gains and it meant that he was an easy target to catch and manipulate, as he was the youngest. Dick had been hidden from the public since he'd returned and had learnt that they'd been told a partial truth. The media believed that the youngest heir had been kidnapped and tortured brutally for 31 days (in contrast to the actual 50 days) and was recovering in the manor and recieving help. No one knew that he was a Talon now, that the destroying of the wretched court had been inspired by his disappearance. And it was important to keep up the pretence which was why he was only allowed in the back gardens which had no way for nosy paparazzi or neighbours to peep over the wall or the gates and spot him. Dick didn't mind. He wasn't overly eager to see people either. Besides, he knew Bruce was worried that Dick would be attacked or taken away from the Waynes if his actual situation was revealed and he had no intentions of being swept away from his home again. 

So he stuck to the back gardens which, in his opinion, were better then the front ones. They were larger and stretched for miles, one side leading to the small forest at the end and the other side leading to the lake.The young Talon hadn't been inside the forest yet but Bruce had taken him to the lake one early morning when he'd found the boy wide awake and curled into a tight ball. His mind wandered as he aimlessly walked around, enjoying the light rain and musing over the memory. His first thought had been a terrifying assumption that the older man was going to hurt him, shove him into he deep body of water or force his head under the water until he couldn't breath, just as the court had done. 

Two minutes with the man had gotten rid of all those fears. When Talon had faltered at approaching the lake and had refused to go further, the man had merely plopped down on the grass, patting the area next to him. When Dick had sat down next to him cautiously, the man had merely nodded in approval before turning to look out at the lake in silence, The ten year old had sat silently next to him, fidgeting as he followed his gaze and eventually, his racing heart had calmed at the sight of the soothing lapse of the water before finally plucking the courage to ask, _'Why here?'_

He hadn't received an answer for a while and Talon had wondered if he had overstepped to question the man before he spoke up, his voice low and soothing, the quiet rumble calming his left over nerves. 'When I first bought you to the manor and you got comfortable, there were two places I always found you whenever you disappeared. You were either on the trapeze in the gym or you were here. You came here no matter what you were feeling and I had to drag you back to the house and sit you in front of the fire more times then I care to count.' A fond smile grazed his lips and he looked at Dick with a strange look in his eyes. 

_Wistful._

'You loved dipping your toes in it and jumping in randomly to give me a heart attack. You would beg me to compete with you in skipping rocks over the lakes and drag Tim into doing idiotic stunts in it. Alfred half demanded for it to be sealed up because he was worried that you'd get yourself permanently sick.' He went quiet again before adding, 'It always calmed you down after a nightmare or a flashback. I thought you'd like to visit it again.' He didn't mention the fact that Dick didn't remember that time but it hung in the air. 

Talon, on the other hand, had felt his heart soar. A part of him disliked hearing about the older vision of him, feeling as if it was an impossible image he would never be able to reach and something his family desperately wanted. But another _larger_ part of him loved to hear it, loved to go over what he was like, what his hobbies and traits were like before they were all sliced away. He knew he wast expected to conform to those traits but they provided a new thing for him to try, a new thing for him to experience all over again. 

And he wanted to experience that again. 

'Dip?' he'd asked and made a gesture as in to get up. Bruce turned to him with a surprised look (or at least as surprised as can appear to be) and sat straighter. 'You want to dip your toes in the water? Really?' 

'Can I?'

'Of course you can, chum. Don't go too far in the water though.'

At that, Dick had given him a questioning look. 'You're...you not coming?' He hadn't meant to but he must have looked or sounded sad because without another moment of hesitance, he'd nodded and gotten to his feet, brushing the stray grass and dirt off his arms and legs before reaching a large hand out to his youngest. 'Of course I'll come.' He said gently and Dick had smiled widely, no longer buried in his previous fears. 

A particularly strong breeze pulled him out of his thoughts and Dick blinked in surprise, not realising how deeply he'd been lost in his thoughts. He looked around in surprise, realising he was in the third or so garden and was now properly soaked. If he craned his neck enough, he could spot the lake he'd been so fondly reminiscing about. He briefly wondered what the lake would look like in the rain but his attention was drawn away and instead focused on the lone swing hanging from one of the trees. His feet carried him to the swing before his mind caught up with it and his fingers stroked the wet rope holding it up. It was only when he'd plopped down on the wooden board and began to swing lightly when he realised in slight shock how easily he'd let his mind wander from one topic to another. Usually, his thoughts were organised and straight cut, focusing on one piece of information or one situation rather then being all over the place, exactly as the court had taught him to. 

He had been so....free with his thoughts just now. 

Dick wasn't delusional enough to think that he was completely recovered from the torture and abuse of the court but he suppose he could take it in a good way that he could see how... _wrong_ it was that his captors had terrified him of _thinking_ in his own manner, to think about anything and everything he wanted rather then just focus obsessively on the orders he'd received. 

The ropes slightly dug into his palms as he lightly kicked his feet against the ground, staring up at the canopy of leaves above him as the swing swayed lightly with his kicks and the wind. The movement caused the branch the swing was tied to shake and several raindrops slipped from the leaves on to his nose and brows and one landed on his tongue. He closed his mouth and licked his lips, shaking his head like a dog as more water fell from the tree, mesmerised by the motion. A giggle slipped through him before he could stop himself and he kicked the ground harder to make the swing sway more, the branch shaking harder, weakened leaves and stray drops falling delicately atop him-

'You laughed.' a voice startled him out of his play and he jumped, his head snapped down to see Cassandra standing to his left. 

Talon hadn't even noticed her approaching. That was bad. That was dangerous. What if she'd been coming to attack him-

He shook his head to get rid of the thought. _Stop it._ he scolded himself sharply. _This is Cass. Sister. Family. Not enemy. Not court. Family._

Still, he couldn't help his wariness as he slowly dragged himself to a stop and stiffened his shoulders before politely asking. 'Bad?' 

She immediately shook her head, her short black hair sticking to her face and framing it prettily. She smiled and Dick was struck by what a kind smile she had. Out of his entire family, Cassandra had the kindest features. Or was that Alfred? No, Alfred usually looked prim and strict. To be fair, he was prim and strict but he was also kind and fair and gentle-

A hand brushed over his cheek and Talon flinched, cursing himself when he realised he'd let his thoughts run off again and zone out. He looked up at his sister through his lashes to gauge her expression but she didn't look angry or annoyed. Her brows were furrowed and her mouth was drawn into a thin line which quickly turned back into a smile as her brother caught her eye. 'Are you okay?' she asked and Dick was surprised but nodded. He cocked his head in a way to ask, _why wouldn't I be?_

She sighed and leant against the trunk, her shoulders slightly hunched to hint that she was cold. 'Worried. You disappeared.' 

Dick looked down at his feet and pressed it into the ground, watching the mud squelch between his toes. The thought of informing Alfred or any of his available siblings that he was going out had crossed his mind but he'd disregarded it in his anticipation. A slight moment of purposeful carelessness had occurred and Dick felt a small twinge of guilt. He'd known that he wouldn't be punished or beaten for his overlook but he shouldn't have taken advantage of their kindness. He poked at a particularly muddy patch with his left big toe and shamefully mumbled, 'Sorry.'

Cass's thin fingers brushed over his shoulders in a reassuring touch to draw his attention to her, smiling kindly at him to show that they weren't upset. She tugged the ends of her long sleeves over her hands and rubbed them together in a way to warm herself up. Dick watched her sleeves flop around and grinned as a dirty leaf fell from the branch above and curled itself into the older girl's short hair. He made a gesture as to remove it but thought better of it and retreated his hand back into his lap. He might have opened up more and Cass was probably the sweetest person he'd met despite also being pretty intimidating (but not in a bad way. In a way that made him feel protected) but he still wasn't completely comfortable with reaching out with physical touches himself. So instead of brushing the leaf out of her hair, he leant slightly against the ropes to stare at the chuffed wood of the bark rather then looking his sister in the eyes. 'Bruce back?' 

'No. He'll be late.' she answered shortly as she finally seemed to notice the leaf and plucked it off, tossing it to the side. 'So will Tim.'

Dick nodded, frowning. He hoped they wouldn't be too late. He never liked it when his family was away for longer than necessary. Which reminded him.... 

'Jason?' 

Her face remained blank but Talon had been trained well enough to decipher body language and he saw her tense just a bit at the mention of their oldest brother. She sighed and shook her head, eyes saddening as Dick's shoulders fell disheartedly. She knew how attached the youngest was to his older brother and vice versa and Dick's presence had smoothed Jason's relationship with the rest of his family but....that wasn't enough to sooth both Bruce's and Jason's hot tempers and clashing ideologies. Her oldest brother had been spending a lot more time at the manor since Dick's return but the fight that had occurred four days ago had been a bad one and Cass knew it would typically take at least a few weeks before Jason could be urged to come back to the manor to spend time with the family outside vigilante activities. Although, he did have a soft spot for the young Talon and if he got to know how upset the boy was at his absence, he might rush back sooner. 

Worth a shot. She'd try it later. For now, she could cheer the boy up in her own way. 

She wrapped her fingers around the rope and used her grip to sway the swing slightly, deciding the safest option was to change the subject. 'Kick at the ground.' she advised and quickly grabbed Dick's hands when he started to do so without holding the ropes. She tugged his left hand up to the rope and gestured for him to do the same with his other. She placed her hand between his shoulder blades and pushed slightly, ducking her arm awkwardly below his wings. 'Go on.'

Dick stared ahead, slightly lost. He....somewhat knew what he was being asked to do. Despite not really remembering ever being in the swing, he could almost feel the phantom movement of his feet kicking against the dirt, the rope cutting into his palms and most of all, the wind in his hair and eyes as he flew higher and higher-

He carefully leant forward and urged the swing forward and kicked the ground with more force then he'd used before. Once the swing moved forward, he straightened his legs s they were pointing out straight, stray droplets hitting his feet now that they were no longer guarded by the canopy of leaves above him. He began to swing back and remembered at the last moment to curl his legs backwards but it was a little too late because the swing wobbled awkwardly instead of going back and forth smoothly. He frowned and dragged his heels against the ground and pouted before trying again, feeling Cass's fingers slightly digging in the skin between his wings as she continued to gently nudge him forward. 

He tried again but his movements weren't coordinated well enough and the swing swayed from side to side in an aggravated manner and he groaned, glaring angrily at his feet as he childishly stomped his foot before freezing when he realised what he'd done. His head snapped to his sister, eyes wide and reproachful as he realised his bratty action. What must she think of him? Throwing a tantrum because he couldn't nail the simple action of coordinating his legs and balance. 

But the ex- assassin didn't seem offended or judgemental but rather, just looked amused. 'You can do it.' She encouraged and let her hand fall from his back. She walked over to the other side of the swing so that she was now standing under the open sky rather then being sheltered by the tree. 'I'll guide.' she offered and Talon sighed but decided to try. He grabbed the ropes firmly and pushed himself back so rather then sitting comfortably on the wooden plank, he was perched on it as he stretched his legs in front of him with his toes holding him up. Cassandra nodded approvingly and gave him a thumbs up. 'Go.'

He took a deep breath and let go and he managed to swing forward, again facing the dilemma of exactly when to curl his legs. But it seemed he didn't have to worry because as he began to fall back, Cassandra called out, 'Fold.'

He folded his legs and to his delight, he swung back smoothly, unfolding his legs and holding them straight up in front of him and pointing with his toes towards the sky when she called out, 'Straight.'

He straightened his legs and swung forward smoothly, going further then he had before. As he swung back, he gave another kick at the ground so as to go faster and he loomed over the ground. From the corner of his eyes, he could see the older girl smiling at him as she continued to shield her eyes from the now thickening rain. 

The blissful sways ended with an abrupt halt as he once again uncoordinated kick and the swing jerked side to side and disrupted the smooth movement yet again. This time, he did growl in frustration and dragged his feet to bring himself to a halt, slouching down and crossing his arms in displeasure. Why couldn't he get it right? Everytime he started having fun, the stupid thing would mess up the tempo and it was just-

'Bad.' He grumbled, slapping the rope petulantly. 'Don't want.' He added, making to stand up but stopped when Cassandra shook her head, slightly disapproving. 

'Don't give up.' she advised, reaching a hand forward to brush it through his damp hair. 'You'll enjoy...' 

'I'm not...' He sulked, he didn't know what had come over him. He didn't know why he was acting so....childish. He'd never dared to whine or complain before. 

'You used to.' she offered as an explanation. 'Try again?' her tone made it clear that she was suggesting it, not ordering it. It made it clear that the young Talon had the option of declining the offer and giving up like he wanted to. But he thought about those few moments when he'd actually been up in the air and the bliss that came with it, the feeling of being _free._ Even if the swing was an annoyance, he did enjoy it. Plus it was one of the few physical activities he'd indulged in since being back and he wasn't ready to go back inside, which he expected would happen if he got up. 

So bracing himself, he dug his feet into the ground and kicked off, listening carefully to Cass's calls of 'Fold' and 'Straight' and moving his legs so, interrupting the pattern to give the ground a strong kick now and then. 

Again, he jostled. 

He growled. 

He started up again. 

He went on for quite a bit of time before losing balance now. But instead of feeling frustrated, he felt determined. He could do it linger, he knew he could. 

He started up again, focusing on his legs, on how the mud squelched as his heel contacted with it, how specks of mud had attached themselves to his skin, how the rain would go from a light to heavy as he swung from the shelter of the tree to outwards and became vulnerable to the open sky. 

It was on his fifth attempt that he realised that he could no longer hear Cass. 

Surprised, he quickly glanced over his shoulder as the swing arched forward, wondering if she'd left. But no, there she stood, hand still protecting her eyes, rain still running down her face and soaking her clothes and a proud smile as her head followed the movements of the swing. She caught his eyes and the smile melted into a grin as she gave him a thumbs up with her other hand and Talon.... 

Talon felt amazing. His own face cracked into a smile as he swung his legs to and fro, angling the swing to go higher and higher, to zoom by faster and faster. 

He had pushed it to its peak velocity when he let go of the ropes with his hands and pointed his feet forward as he _flew_ through the air, his wings sprouting from their curled up manner to spread widely on either side of him as he began to descend towards the ground. His feet hit the grass and his knees crumbled as he curled himself into a ball and rolled forward before springing up to his feet, an uncharacteristically huge grin in his face. Spinning on his feet, he rushed back to his sister who seemed to be frozen in step, the now unoccupied swing oscillating back to a stop. 

'I did it! I did it!' He cheered, too happy to ponder on what _exactly_ he'd done and why he was so proud of it. All he knew that swinging from the swing and flying through the air completely unsupported before landing perfectly had filled him with a sense of pride and nostalgia. He didn't understand why he felt like that, maybe it was something his older self had been unable to accomplish? Or maybe he'd been fond of doing that particular stunt? But at this point, he didn't _care_ why he cared. 

He just knew he'd _never_ felt as good as he felt right now. 

This was the most alive he'd felt...in ever. 

Cassandra was grinning from ear to ear, eyes shining at the youngest's unapologetic happiness. She nodded proudly and praised, 'Good job.' And as the ten year old preened at her compliment, she could _see_ the old Dick peeking out from behind the masks this Talon wore so carefully. If she ignored the humongous and drenched wings and the slight swirl of yellow in Dick's otherwise sharp blue eyes, she could pretend that the whole court of Owls thing never happened. 

But it _had_ happened. Dick _had_ changed. Which made his current childish excitement and happiness so the more heartwarming. He was _laughing_. He was _proud._

He was _healing._

She ruffled his hair before nodding towards the manor. 'Go back?' She would stay if Dick wanted to but she was really hoping he didn't. She'd never particularly been fond of the rain, having spent too many nights lying under the cold and unforgiving rain after a bad beating and shivering as the drops would lap at her wounds, inflicted from enemies and her father. And though she knew she didn't have to worry about that now, that she could go and change into warm clothes immediately, it still didn't ease her general dislike of the weather. 

To her relief, the younger boy nodded, a small smile still playing on his lips. The two fell into step and silently made their way back to the house and as they grew closer and closer, Cassandra thought about how....good things had been with Dick lately. Since the gala more then a month ago, the boy had steadily improved more and more. He slept more soundly, he talked a bit more, he smiled more openly. He'd even started eating a bit now, and Cass had swore she'd seen tears in Alfred's eyes when Dick had tentatively eaten a small piece of buttered bread. But today was the first time she'd seen him so....Happy. Excited. Relaxed even. 

Today was the first time she'd heard Dick Grayson laugh in months. 

And as they stepped into the warm interior of the manor and she shivered gratefully, she couldn't help but think how.... _dark_ and _miserably empty_ the home had felt since Dick's disappearance. Even after his return, it felt as if he was just another shadow, sticking to the dark and shying away from them all. But now, as she watched him wave merrily at a surprised Bruce and Alfred, it felt warmer and brighter then it had seemed in a long time. 

'Oh dear, you're soaked.' Alfred sighed, ushering a large towel over the boy's thin shoulders and drooped wings, but his eyes were soft as he took in the _gleam_ in the child's eyes. 'Let's get you dried and in clean pants. Into the guest bedroom, come along. I shall not have musty leaves and dirt following you all the way up to your room.' He held out a spare towel to Cassandra who took it and thanked him politely. 'You too, young miss. Please do not loiter around in those wet clothes, you'll get yourself sick.' With that, he hurried the young boy to the door on the left, pausing only for Bruce to reach forward and ruffle Dick's hair fondly as he passed by. Cassandra wrapped the towel around her shoulders as she toed off her wet flip-flops with a relieved sigh, smiling at her father who looked happier then she'd seen him. 

Bruce went back to taking hie tie off, moving on to undoing the cuffs of his suit jacket, clearly having just gotten back from the office. 'He looks happy.' He comments off handedly, and Cassandra wonders if she's imagining the bewildered happy look on his face. Nevertheless, she nodded in agreement and added. 'He's....feeling.'

Bruce raised his brow, slightly confused. Cassandra internally sighed. While she may have arrived at the manor as a feral mute child, she'd eventually groomed herself and had even picked up the English language quite well, much to Bruce's pride. She'd started of speaking like Dick spoke now, broken sentences and with incorrect grammer but now, she knew the language pretty well. But she still chose to speak in short sentences rather than long ones and use short simple words rather then complex ones. But sometimes, the situation called for her to do just that. 

'He's expressing well. Emotions.' she explained and Bruce relaxed, having worried that something was wrong. He nodded absently, wandering towards the guest door where Dick had disappeared behind. 'He was happy. Annoyed. Curious. He was....a lot.'

Bruce's eyes seem to light up at that, at the fact that Dick was no longer hiding his emotions. He was feeling. He was opening up. He was.... 

'He's getting better.' He commented and Cassandra nodded happily, walking over to her mentor and squeezing his large hand in her tinier ones, relishing in the warmth his large rough hands provided. 'He's returning.' she commented before letting her hand drop and trudging towards the bathroom in the spare guest room, letting her words hang in the air. She didn't have to voice it clearly for Bruce to understand what she meant. 

Dick had been the light of the Waynes family. And the court had taken that light and crushes it without a second thought, dimmed it so that it was almost non-existent. 

But now, weeks and weeks of gentle words and reassuring touches and support were giving them a much awaited result. The light that Dick had always carried with him was flickering now, weak and inconsistent but it was there. 

Their light was returning to them. And as Bruce pushed the door open to the bedroom Dick had disappeared into, he realised just how _much_ he'd missed it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this transitions seems abrupt. I really tried to make it transition smoothly from Dick only seeing himself as a mindless weapon and warm of everything to slowly opening up. Here, Dick has accepted himself as a person and as a part of the family but yes not completely there yet, this the sudden sprouses of referencing himself as Talon. 
> 
> Also Damian isn't forgotten. He's at home that's why I didn't bring him up. 
> 
> Anyway, I really like this chapter. I love swimming and I love the rain and I kinda pushed all my loves for it on to Dick. I'll probably end up writing a chapter in swimming and cycling soon, so stay tuned. 
> 
> ANYWAY NEED YOUR HELP:
> 
> Next chapter can be up to you. Just give me any happy scenario or activity you want Dick to indulge in but it can't be with Jason.
> 
> Other then that, thank you for your support on this story. It means so much and it really really motivates me to write.


	5. Scooby Doo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There were a lot of requests for Bruce and Dick's bonding time so I decided to do the request that asked for him to fall Bruce dad again and to watch Madagascar with them. Though I changed it to Scooby doo because I feel like Dick would love the cartoon as much as me. 
> 
> I loved alot of other requests too and I'm going to work it in in future chapters so don't worry. 
> 
> Thank you to all who gave requests :-)

Pain. That was all he saw, all he heard, all he _felt._ It licked at every bone in his body, overwhelming his senses until nothing made sense except for the excruciating agony that thrummed through his very blood. His mouth was left hanging open in a silent scream, throat burning and voice gone from the _hours_ he'd spent begging for mercy and forgiveness. 

He knew better then that now. Talons don't beg. Talons only obey and endure. 

Through the rushing of his own blood rushing through his ears, he heard the grandmaster lazily order, 'Again.' 

More gashes were left on his skin, cutting it open so as to let the blood ooze out freely. The shackles clanged against the wall as he struggled and squirmed but his movement was weak and sluggish, pain numbing his fight and flight instincts. Again and again, the whip ruthlessly slapped his body in an unforgiving manner and leaving behind an agonising burn. Tears and sweat became one as they dripped from his chin on to the cold barren floor, his melted wings hanging limply behind him but tensing with each hit. 

Talon wished for death to take him. He did not want to survive anymore. He did not want to serve. But he knew it was a wistful crave. 

The torture would never stop. He was a Talon. He may not be fully transformed yet, but he was a Talon and could no longer be considered human. Humans don't have wings. Humans don't have unnatural yellow eyes. 

Humans don't heal. 

He would heal. Every lash he received, every cut ingrained into his skin would eventually heal and fade away without so much as a scar. His renegading abilities may not be top notch or as advanced as the other Talons but in a week or so, his burnt and melted wings would be good as new and in a matter of a few hours, the whipped gashes would seal and smoothen out. 

Talon hated it. He wished he wouldn't heal. He wish he wouldn't survive. He didn't want to leave this bunker alive. But he knew the court was not that merciful. Talon was to be played with, to be broken down, to be injured beyond belief but never to be killed. 

Break him. Not kill him. Make him into the perfect weapon. That was their goal. 

A hand roughly worked through his hair and Talon was still screaming, overly sensitive, could still feel the burns and aches and the _pain-_

'Have you learnt your lesson, Grayson?'

Had he learnt to not think for himself? Had he learnt that he was just a powerless wretch? Talon....talon still couldn't bring himself to give in to them. It would be easier if he did. They'd complete his transition, turn him into a mindless follower. He would never truly feel anything ever again. 

But something always held him back. Feelings he couldn't explain. 

_Faith_

_Pride_

_Loyalty_

Faith that he would be saved. Pride that he would not give in to these monsters. Loyalty to those who'd save him, who he didn't know, who he couldn't recall-

A vicious slap to his face. 'Grayson. Shall we continue?'

No. He couldn't bear this anymore. Pleas slipped through his lips before he could stop them, fear overpowering any logicality he had before-

He heard the hisses and the shush of conversation start up again. Hazily, he could make out his tormentor, stepping up again, a lighter flickering a small fire and he twisted in his restraints, 

'No! No, no, no, no-'

The voices grew louder and his tormentor stepped closer. He felt something slimy crawling down his body and oh god, they'd covered his entire body with gasoline now, they were going to burn him whole now-

The voice was still there. The hand running through his hair was still there. But the grandmaster was not. His body shook with powerful tremors but something didn't feel right-

'Dick-'

Dick? That....that was his name, right? Dick....Grayson-

 _Talon._ He was Talon. A weapon of the court of owls. Talon was-

'Dickie....nightmare- open....eyes.'

The court owned him. They did what they pleased to him. Talon was at their disposal-

'Shush. Ssh, no more crying. Wake up, chum.'

_Chum_

Bruce-

His eyes snapped open abruptly and his vision swam as the dark cold bunker dissolved into the cool blue that was his room. His limbs worked on their own accord as he struggle against whatever was holding and binding him down, too panicked to keep a cool head. With a blood curdling scream, he _wretched_ the blanket away from him, barely registering the loud _rip_ that sounded through the room, scrambling to his feet and only being able to vaguely register the large silhouette before he dropped to his knees and retched loudly, bile gushing last his lips and splattering on the carpet. 

Over his own retches and sobs, he heard a sad and familiar voice whisper, 'Oh pup', before a hand ducked beneath his wings to rub between them, the weight warm and comforting. Talon curled his fingers into the carpet as he continued gagging, his stomach cramping painfully and his throat burning until nothing else came up. 

There he sat, shuddering pathetically and sweat dripping from his chin on to the caper, sucking in short breaths through his teeth and blinking furiously to get rid of the images from his nightmare. He could still smell the gasoline and blood, could still hear the whip cracking-

'Dick?' 

_Dick. He was Dick. Not Talon. Not Grayson. Dick._

The court didn't address him as Dick. Only his family did. 

He raised his head to meet kind blue eyes and a comfortingly familiar face pulled into a a frown which immediately dropped in a surprised 'oomph' as the ten year old suddenly launched himself at the man, wrapping his knobby and trembling limbs around his shoulders. Dick shuddered against Bruce's chest, basking in the warmth his body provided and an unsolicited whimper cut through the air as his father hugged him back, one arm wrapped around his lower back and the other raking large fingers so gently through his hair. 

'It's okay Dick. You're okay. Just a nightmare.' Bruce promised, holding his child close and cursing the watched court for the umpteenth time. Four months after his escape, four months of healing and progress and the court still haunted the poor boy. The nightmares had grown less in frequency over the months and Dick no longer fought back viciously when he was woken. Internally, he'd accepted that he was finally away from the court and that no one in this house would ever so much as touch a hair on his head with malicious intent but the nightmares still left him in shambles, transformed him back to the terrified and unsure being he'd been when he first came back. 

Bruce would be damned before he let Dick succumb to that. Not again. Not now when Dick had come so far. He squeezed his boy closer and shuffled away from the puddle of foul bile drying up from where Dick had thrown up. He hummed softly before gently reassuring, 'I've got you. No one's going to hurt you.' 

He thought Dick wouldn't respond. He never did when he awoke from nightmares and night terrors. Mostly, he'd just remained curled into a ball, refusing to be touched or to let anyone get close as he sobbed into his arms and rocked back and forth. It was a testament of how far Dick had come that not only was he letting Bruce hold him, he actually acknowledged him with a shaky, 'D-dad-' 

The dark Knight froze, pausing abruptly in his gentle rocking and back pats, eyes comically wide and mouth dry, brain seeming to malfunction as it absorbed what Dick had just uttered in his fear driven state. 

_Dad._

In all his years of being a foster parent, Bruce had- well, he had been referred to as Dad by his kids before but the shock and the happiness that filled him whenever he heard that title addressed to him never wavered. It still caused his heart to jump into his throat and filled hon with too many emotions to decipher but one overpowered the others. 

_Love._

After the brutal murder of his parents, he had grown up accepting that he would be alone for the rest of his life, that he would never feel that sentiment ever again. And then Jason had come in his life. He'd been his first child and Bruce had understood what _love_ felt like, had experienced an overwhelming surge of it towards the boy. Jason had been his first dosage of familial love. 

Tim had been his second. Cassandra his third. Damian his fourth. And finally, Dick. 

Bruce loved all his children. He loved them in their best moments and he continued loving them in their worst. He loved them despite their uncountable fights and disagreements. The urge to love, care and protect them was something that always thrummed through him. He'd always love his kids. He'd always want to protect them. 

But with Dick...he was more protective. He'd never had a child come into his care this young, or a child this traumatised. Dick had been through so much in his young life and all Bruce wanted to do was keep him wrapped up in a safety blanket and keep him close. He couldn't bear the thought of Dick hurting anymore, this wonderful child whom he loved so much that it scared him. Bruce loved him more then anything else in the world. He was his son in everything but blood. 

And....Bruce was his Dad. Despite the numerous times he'd heard it directed at him, it never failed to send him into a whirlpool of emotions and past memories-

A small hitch in Dick's breathing snapped him from his early induced shock and he looked down at the child still curled into a terrified ball in his lap. 

Right. He had to focus on the task at hand, not spiral into his emotions. 

He gently peeled Dick's face away from his neck. The child's eyes were still unclear, as if he was still lost, still so scared and vulnerable. Rubbing his thumb over the wet cheek, he smiled softly as Dick's wandering eyes found his and he gathered the child fully in his arms before standing up. 'I'm here.' He whispered in a hushed manner, heart squeezing painfully as Dick's grip on his shirt tightened and his lips soundlessly mouthed 'Dad' again. He hefted the child on to his hip securely and moved to sit on the bed but stopped when Dick shook his head and twisted his hands so tightly into the fabric of his shirt that Bruce was sure that he'd tear the garment apart. 'Not sleeping.'

'Chum, it's late. You need your rest.'

'No!' Dick's brow furrowed into a frown and more tears slipped from his chin on to his shirt. 'I'm not sleeping!' 

Bruce suppressed an exasperated sigh and nodded reluctantly. He would have usually not indulged such kind of demands but a lot has changed in the past few months. Maybe he could try to bargain? 

'What if I stay with you till you fall asleep?'

Dick shook his head stubbornly. 'No.'

'You can sleep in my bed.'

'No.' The word was dragged out dramatically as Dick slumped against Bruce's hold. The billionaire had to hold in an amused smirk as he gently rubbed his ward's slightly sweaty back. He glanced outside the window and rolled his eyes at the darkening clouds. Damn Gotham and it's persistent rains. He couldn't even take Dick to the lake like he used to. He was pretty much out of options now. 

'Leave room.'

'Hmm?'

'I...' Dick struggled with his words, frustrated with himself for not remembering how to phrase the particular sentence he wanted to say. He might be getting better in his vocalisation, but he was shaken up to make his brain function properly. 'Me. You. Leave. Hate here.'

'Do you want to leave your room?' Dick nodded, relieved that his guardian had understood his request. 'And go where?' 

Duck shrugged, twisting his fingers in the thick cloth of his sweatpants. He hadn't thought that far, still too accustomed to having decisions made for him. Bruce nodded and stood up, carefully tugging Dick up with him and situating him in the crook of his elbow. Dick's wings nudged his thigh as the young boy lowered them as far as he could so as to not obscure Bruce's vision. 

'Let's go downstairs. Maybe some warm milk will help settle you down.'

Dick pursed his lips and scrunched his nose, nestling his face into his guardian's shoulder so as to not give away his distaste. He hated milk. Alfred made him drink a cup of warm milk at least four times a week regularly but he didn't really know how to get out of it without getting in trouble or offending the Elders.

He was carried down the dark hallways and down the stairs, eyes hazy as the windows passed him by. Bruce splayed his large hand on the small of Dick's back, patting a soothing rhythm as they walked to the kitchen. Dick yawned loudly as they approached the main living room attached to the kitchen, turning his head to rub his nose against Bruce's soft sweater. He heard the older man chuckle fondly and then he was suddenly being lowered. The ten year old blinked in confusion as he shifted on the soft pillows of the couch, shuffling to his knees to grip the back of the couch and looking up at his father. 'Kitchen?' 

'You stay here. I'll get you some milk and clean the bile a bit.' He leaned over to pick the TV remote and switched it on, handing it back to the confused Talon after lowering the tone to an appropriate volume so as not to disturb the remaining sleeping occupants of the house. Tim was staying over with the Titans and Damian was spending the night with Jon. Jason was still avoiding him and thus, avoiding the manor like the plague. The only people in the house was Cassandra and Alfred, neither of whom were heavy sleepers and he didn't want either of them to be disturbed if he could help it. But he knew from experience that Dick despised silence and being left alone normally, especially after nightmares. 'You can choose something to watch while I do that. If you want.'

Dick's eyes lit up and he nodded eagerly, turning around to flop lazily on the couch, tucking his wings behind him carefully. He flipped through the channels, wrinkling his nose as he surfed through the boring ones featuring pasty white dudes in stiff looking suits and ties, delivering boring facts in a monotone way and bleak images until he finally stumbled across an animated movie. The cheerful music and bright colours grabbed his attention and he tilted his head in interest, watching in delight as the animated lion and zebra twisted around each other in a comical fantasy, their cartoonist face were twisted in bright grins. He gripped his crossed ankles and leant closer to the screen, eyes bright as a hippo and giraffe appeared on the screen next, their hooves connected in what he assumed was a mockery of human hand holding. Behind the singing animals, bright fireworks and lights erupting all over the screen. The music grew louder, the singing voices harmonising together as they moved towards what he suppose was the ending notes of the songs. He hoped it was not the end of the movie and just the end of the song. 

To his disappointment, the screen went black and the credits for the movie began to flitter by. He leant back against the couch and pouted, glancing up at the door as Bruce stepped back in, nursing a rather large cup of steaming milk. His brows furrowed in amusement as he debated whether he should tell the man that Alfred usually gave him the smallest cup in their collection, the one with cartoon superman sprawled on it. He decided against it and took the cup gratefully, thanking him politely as he clutched it with both his hands, frowning at the plain white liquid that looked back at him. He forced himself to take a small sip, his training and self restrain being the only thing that kept him from pulling a face in disgust. 

God, he really hated milk. Maybe one day, he'll actually work up the courage to tell his caretakers that he really despised it. 

The couch dipped as Bruce took a seat next to him and rubbing the sleep from his eyes, stifling a yawn as he gazed at the screen in bemusement. 'When I said you can watch anything you wanted, I didn't think you'd choose to watch some random movies ending credits.'

Dick took another sip and pouted at him. 'It ended.' he explained and carefully perched the cup on the coffee table and aimed the remote at the TV, pressing the button that changed the channel. The screen went blank for a millisecond before flickering back to life to show yet another colourful cartoon. Nostalgia tugged at him and he scrambled up as he recognised the characters on the screen and before he realised he was doing, he was happily calling out, 'Scooby Doo!' 

Bruce startled and glanced at him, his usually carefully blank face contorted in surprise. 'You recognise it?' 

Dick nodded, unsure of how exactly he did. He knew for certain he hadn't watched this particular cartoon since his return which was really all the time he could remember but seeing those characters had sparked a flicker of recognition deep within him, something he hadn't even known he remembered. It just....spilled out of him. 

He lifted one hand to point at the screen as the other fisted his eyes sleepily. 'Freddie.' He recalled, growing excited as he recalled the names of the characters. He waited till the frame shifted to the dog and the green shirted fellow and he smiled, 'Scooby and Shaggy.' He paused as he observed the lanky character before adding, 'Shaggy looks like Tim.'

Bruce grunted a small laugh, shaking his head. His heart twisted in his chest in an odd combination of both happiness and grief. A _joke._ Dick had just made a _joke._ Months after his return, Dick had not once even attempted to make a joke, even when his family had provided home with a clear opportunity. It was such a small thing but it was such a huge step forward. He wanted to keep it going so he asked, 'How so?' 

Dick was silent for a while, simply observing the characters run around the muddy patch before gesturing towards his head. 'Long hair.'

'You know your hair is almost as long as Tim's, right?' 

Dick shook his head and wove his fingers through his hair to make it stand up. 'Curly. And not that long.'

'Alfred disagrees. He's been pestering me to get you and Tim to cut your hair.'

Dick let his hair flop back over his eyes and shook his head. 'No scissors please.' He said quietly and turned his attention back to the screen, eager to avoid delving into that scenario. A red head was currently yelling at Freddie and he frowned as he tried to recall her name. 'Dinah?' 

'Daphne.' Bruce corrected and groaned in annoyance at Dick's shocked startle. 'I used to watch it with you before....everything. You insisted that it reminded us of our family seeing as there were five of them.'

'Five siblings.'

Bruce hummed, too tired to argue that again. He'd indulged Dick in those amiable debates too many times. Dick rubbed his eyes again as the screen grew dark, the change of scenario appearing more sinister and ominous. Normally, the cartoonist appearance wouldn't have bothered him but tonight, he was immediately taken back to his dream of torture, of being alone and left in the hands of his merciless torturers-

A shudder ran through his body and he hugged himself tightly, rubbing his palm over his bare arms, trying to sooth the goosebumps that arose on his skin. He pulled his knees to his chest and tucked his face into them. 

'Dickie? What's wrong?' Bruce asked in concern, taken aback by the sudden change in the boy's personality. Though he suppose that he shouldn't be too surprised. Dick had become prone to swift mood changes in the past few weeks. He glanced at the screen and then back at his youngest, suddenly connecting the dots and shaking his head. He had completely forgotten how tactile Dick was after a horrible nightmare and he'd been left alone while he was still somewhat unsettled. Through the glare of the TV, he could see the dried streaks of tears on Dick's face that had dried and caked themselves to his skin. Shaking himself from his frozen state, he reached his arm up to wrap around his boy's shoulder. Dick startled at the unexpected touch before he leant into it, lifting his arms so that he could be pulled close. The man didn't hesitate to hoist the boy up and into his lap, tangling his fingers in Dick's long curls again, rubbing his palm over his scalp. Dick relaxed from his tense posture, snuggling against Bruce's chest, letting safety wash over him. Already, he could feel his jitters slip away, because his dad had him, his father would keep him safe. Just like he'd been protecting Dick from the start. 

Bruce kicked his legs on the couch, leaning far back so that he could rest his head on the arm rest of the couch. He lay back comfortably, situating Dick to lay on his chest, ruffling his hair and holding him as close as he could. He rubbed Dick's shoulders, arm curving over the wings and pinning them to Talon's back, his tuft of black hair tickling his chin. Dick tucked his cold feet under Bruce's leg as his hands fisted his father's shirt, nestling as close as he could. Squishing his cheek against Bruce's broad chest as he focused back on the TV and his guardian's comfortingly warm embrace, rather then the nightmarish memories and his crazed heart. 

A short girl dressed in an orange sweater and red skirt crouched down and ran her finger over a dusty shelf covered in a suspicious sticky purple substance and raise it to eye level, observing it carefully. He let go of Bruce's shirt to point at her and said, 'Velma's a detective.'

'Mhm. Technically, they're all detectives.'

'Like you.'

Bruce paused, taken aback. He'd never thought about it like that, never even sat and realised that these children in ludicrous adventures were _actually_ detectives. He didn't know how he felt being compared to them though. 

'I suppose so.' He agreed gruffly before adding, 'Though I would like to assume that I'm a bit more...dignified then these rowdy youngsters.'

'Okay. They're like the others.'

'That.... I can see.'

'They should dress up like that too.'

'Sloppily?' 

'Not Daphne and Fred.'

'They're wearing scarves.'

'Stylish.'

'Really? Should we get you some scarves?'

Dick pulled a face before he could stop himself and Bruce laughed, moving his hand from Dick's waist to his face to gently tap his nose, making the young boy grin happily. He went back to sweeping his hand through Dick's hair, trapping his other hand beneath his head to provide a more comfortable support. One glance to the window showed the sky growing lighter and the lightest of drizzle spraying over the glass window. He sighed internally. He had to be up for work in a few hours and he had desperately wanted to catch up on some sleep after his patrol but it seemed he would be working through the day on an unhealthy amount of coffee. 

'I think the band leader did it.'

Bruce paused, unsure of how to reply. He hadn't exactly been following the movie but he did recall two opposing bands of different genders. 'Which one?' 

'The Vamps.'

'The female ones?'

'No, they're the Hex girls.'

'......Okay. So the male ones?'

'Yeah.'

'Why do you think that?'

'Too helpful.'

Huh. Had his paranoia already leaked into Dick? He'd been trying his best to stay 'normal' in front of him. He hoped Jason would keep his snarky comments about this to himself. 

He heavily doubted that would happen though. It seemed as if his oldest son _thrived_ on passing upsetting taunts to get under his skin. 

'What about you?'

'Me? I think it's the manager.'

'Oh. Which one?'

'The one in the red shirt.'

'The black one?'

Bruce grimaced and squeezed Dick. 'Yes. Him.'

'Why?'

'Same reason as yours. Too kind and helpful. The band leader is just a diversion.'

'He's....helping him?' 

'I don't think so. I assumed the directors and writers of the movie just wanted him to appear as suspicious so as to not make them skeptical of the real villain.'

'Bet?'

Bruce paused and looked down to try and catch Dick's face, wanting to see if he'd said that on purpose. But all he could see was a large head of fluffy black curls. 

_'Wanna bet a penny?'_

_'I don't bet.'_

_'My mom and...my dad used to do that. Bet a...penny.'_

_'Oh._

_'It was kind of, like....fun.'_

_'Hmm.....Just a penny.'_

It was a long shot that Dick would remember that particular activity but it still made his heart thrum like a drum. He swallowed thickly, his mouth feeling uncomfortably dry as he nodded, perching his chin on Dick's head. 

'I'll bet you a penny.'

'The big one?'

'There is only one type of penny, chum.'

'Nah-uh. Cave penny.'

'You want the large penny in the cave?' He asked, amused. 'What would you do with it?' 

'In my room.'

'And how would you get it up?'

'Jason and Cass. They're strong.'

'And you see no flaw with that plan?'

Dick shrugged, the movie all but forgotten as he nudged Bruce's hand with his head so that he could presume the head rubs. His eyes were growing heavy again and with Bruce's warm presence next to him, the prospect of falling dead to the world didn't seen as terrifying as before. He could just close his eyes and relax and just go to sleep right here, right now-

-except there was this one pricking insecurity that just wouldn't back off. 

He could voice his concern to Bruce. The man had been his rock for _months_ and had been a solid comfort for weeks and he had no doubts that he could rid all his fears if he just talked to him. His family had been encouraging him to talk and share his thoughts with them so he knew they wouldn't be taken aback by his sudden chattiness but still he wasn't sure if they would appreciate being ra-

'Hey.' Bruce snapped his fingers gently in front of his face, causing Dick to startle and crane his neck up to lock his eyes with his father. The man had pushed himself up in a somewhat semi sitting position and was looking at him with a hard to read expression. It took him a moment or two to decipher the emotion swirling in his eyes to be concern. 'Everything okay? You zoned out on me.'

'I...I-' He stuttered, struggling to get his words out. God, why was this so hard? He wanted to talk to Bruce, shouldn't that be enough for his stupid mind?

'Dickie.' A hand gently cupped his cheek, the thumb swiping over the soft skin. 'Talk to me.' 

The ten year old hesitated, staring up at his father, searching his eyes for any signs of deceit or anger. He came up short. Bruce looked at him like he always did. With genuine care and parental love. 

Screw it. He's gonna try his luck. 

'If....' He bit down on his lip hard as he pondered over how to word his concerns. A thumb gently pulled it away from his teeth and Bruce flicking his chin in a chiding manner. 'Don't bite down on your lip, kiddo. You'll make yourself bleed.'

'I'll heal.'

'Doesn't mean you should hurt yourself on purpose.' Bruce grunted gruffly. Now why don't you tell me what's bothering you?'

'Okay...you're not going to- to leave me?'

'Leave you? Why would I....?'

'If I mess up. Would you....'

'-get rid of you?' He finished and had to tighten his jaw as Dick give a bodily flinch. 'Oh chum. We've been over this countless times.'

Dick shrugged, rubbing the tip of one of his wings between his thumb and forefinger nervously. He didn't know what direction Bruce was going in. Was he mad? Exasperated? He wished his heart would calm down long enough for him to focus on something else. 

'Dickie, I will never ever _ever_ get rid of you. It wasn't a possibility when you first started loving with me three years ago and it's not a possibility now or anywhere in the near future. You're my kid. I-' He swallowed, his tongue suddenly feeling heavier then lead. _Suck it up, Wayne. You've been through much worse then telling a ten year old that you love him._ '.... I love you, pup.' the words felt sticky and heavy on his tongue but so _true._ He loved his kid and it was important Dick knew that. 

The child, in turn, startled, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open. 'L-love?' 

Bruce forced himself to nod, despite the embarrassment that swelled in him at Dick's unexpectedly shaky response. 'Yes.' He added instead, time firm.

Dick, in turn, felt his eyes tear up for a completely different reason. He knew....he knew he was loved. Actions did speak louder then words and his family's protectiveness and coddling spoke for itself. He knew they loved him. And he loved them. But....this was the first time he'd heard it directed at him. And it... 

It felt amazing. 

He smiled wobbly, leaning forward to bury his face in his father's neck, shoulders slumping in relief as Bruce immediately hugged him back. He rubbed his temple against Bruce's stubby chin before mumbling, 'Love you too, B.'

Bruce's tensed figure slackened in relief at the words and he scratched Dick's scalp, feeling just as astounded and content as the youngest at hearing those words uttered but they were long overdue. 

So much had happened in the past few months. Dick had been through so much. He'd all but forgotten what love and affection felt like, been so used to being neglected and abused. 

But....here he was. The former slave of the court of owl was snuggled against him, had improved his speech so much and had just told him he loved him. He'd improved so much. He'd come so far. Bruce couldn't be prouder of the boy but he had no doubt that tomorrow would bring him more pride over the boy's resilience and growth. He held him closer and pressed his cheek to Dick's head, closing his eyes as he let all his worries slip away, only focusing on his boy. 

Dick allowed himself to relax fully now, finally closing his eyes and allowing the claws of drowsiness grab him and drag him into unconsciousness. He was safe. If Bruce said he was safe and would always be safe, he believed him. As long as he had his father, everything would be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _The italic parts is taken from the coming batman and Robin 2016 issue #54. I love that comic, it's so soft and focuses on the bond between Bruce and Dick and it's just so cute and sad at the same time._
> 
> I'm sorry for the late reply. Life's been hard as usual. You'd think I would have gotten used to it by now. 
> 
> Thank you so so much for all the more and supportive comments in the last chapter. They genuinely make me feel better and motivate me to work on this story. 
> 
> Hope you like this chapter! 
> 
> Next chapter will be focused on Alfred and Dick and also Bruce and Dick for a while and eventually Jason.


	6. Not ready to be left alone

Bruce grimaced, a hand running through Dick's hair as the boy's cries echoed in the kitchen. At the island, Alfred's back was turned as he assembled more toasts, his shoulders tense in a way the billionaire knew meant he was conveying the message, 'I told you so.'

It seemed his surrogate father had been disappointed enough times in his life to now be able to convey it in other ways than his eyes and words.

Couldn't focus on that now. He had a ten year old's arms wound around his hips and a tearful stain growing on his shirt where his son had hidden his face in his stomach.

'Ssh Chum.' He soothed, fingers twisting in the soft curls. 'It's not a big deal. We'll be back by Sunday. Only seven days.'

'N-no.'

'Alfred, Damian and Cassandra will be here with you.' 

_Maybe Jason might drop by too._ He didn't word that out loud though. Dick had been moping about Jason's absence for more than a month now (so had Bruce) and he didn't want to give him false hope. Maybe his eldest might actually drop by now that Bruce wasn't home, which would definitely cheer Dick up.

'No!' Dick pulled his face away from from Bruce's stomach to stare up at him with puffy tearful eyes and wobbling lips. 'You stay too!'

'Believe me, I wish I could. But I've been putting this trip off for months now and I can't do it anymore.' It was true. Since Dick's return, he'd put off and refused every trip that would take more than a day, whether it was a league trip or work trip. However, Lucius and Tim had done as much as they could without him but as the CEO, he had the power and intimidation the others just did not and he really needed to get this deal sealed for the company. 'Tim and I won't be long.'

'Please.' he begged, twisting his fists in Bruce's white shirt. 'Please don't leave me!' 

Oh god. He'd never been able to say no to Dick normally and when he'd administer puppy eyes, he pretty much lost hope. He wrapped one arm around Dick's shaky shoulders and rubbed his arm, trying not to focus on how thin it was. He used the other hand to wipe the tears streaking down the boy's pale cheeks and rubbed his knuckle over the soft skin. 

He tried again. 'I'm not leaving you, kiddo. I'll be back soon.'

'You're leaving now.' he complained.

'For 7 days. That's it. Then I'll be back.' 

Dick made an indecipherable sound and pulled away from Bruce's gentle touch to hide his face in his stomach again. 'Dad....'

......Maybe he could put off the trip a little longer. At least till Dick was in a better place-

'Nope.' a voice called as Tim walked in to the kitchen, fixing his tie and eyes hard and averted from Dick. 'Don't go down that rabbit hole again. We've been putting this off for weeks now and if we don't go now, it'll keep hanging over our head. Better to get it over with.'

Bruce grunted in answer, rubbing tiny circles on Dick's back as his wings shook along with his sobs. He was usually one who was able to keep his mind clear and set in their goals and not let his emotions come in the way. He didn't know how he felt that Tim was the logical one right now.

Tim leant his hip against the counter as he picked up a cup full of steaming coffee, nodding at Alfred in gratitude. He reached forward and gently pinched Dick's red ear and fondled it gently as a way to get his attention. 'Why are you even up this early? You don't usually wake up till 10 and it's not even 9 yet.'

Dick's arms tightened around Bruce as he pulled a face. 'Heard you last night. Making plans for today.'

Tim hummed and out of the corner of his eyes, Bruce swore he saw Alfred's lips quirk into a triumphant smile. He rolled his eyes subtly in response.

What was with his family today and their _told you so_ attitude?

Tim took a few more heavy gulps before setting the mug down firmly and crouching down on one knee, tugging the Talon towards him. Dick yelped at the sudden force as he was pulled away from Bruce but at the last moment,he swiped out and snagged the edge of his shirt, which had come untucked from his insistent tucking. Now, the boy stood in front of his older brother, head ducked as tears slipped from his chin on to his shirt.

Tim smiled softly and rubbed Dick's arms, squeezing the biceps comfortingly as he spoke in the gentlest tone he could muster, 'I'm sorry we have to leave kiddo. And unfortunately, we _are_ going to leave.' When Dick looked ready to protest, he quickly shushed him as a way to continue, 'But that's only because we don't want to be away from you for too long. If we put this off longer, the trip could extend to three weeks or even a month. And none of us want that, do we?'

Dick glowered at the floor petulantly, even as his fingers squeezed the fabric of his family members shirts tightly, keeping them both in place. '7 days is too long...' Bruce but his lip at that, gently covering Dick's small hand with his and squeezing it. He didn't know if this was Dick's wavered perception of time speaking or his abandonment issues. As usual, Dick had exceeded expectations and had made remarkable progress, better then any other child or really anyone could have been expected to do so and it was this improvement that had let him be so lax with his emotions. The Talon from three or so months ago would never have dared to look them in the eye, let alone voice his thoughts out or allow himself to feel so _strongly._ And here he was, openly expressing his sadness, clinging to them in a physical contact that would have probably put him in shock at the start and openly showing vulnerability to them. It was a long progress from where he'd started from and Bruce was grateful for it even if this new fear of abandonment and his overly clinginess was a new and slightly daunting challenge.

It was still better then the boy who had just barely existed.

'It is.' Tim agreed mournfully, the smallest of smiles tugging at his lips. 'But it's better than a month right? I know you want to keep us close but nothing bad is going to happen. We'll come back. I promise.'

Dick didn't say anything back and Bruce could really only see the back of his head but he assumed some kind of non verbal interaction had taken place because Tim next asked, 'Have we ever broken a promise to you? No, right? We don't plan on starting now. I promise, time will fly by faster then you realise and we'll be back and present before you know it.'

Dick's head, if possible, ducked even lower then before before he muttered something, the words muffled and small. Bruce didn't catch any of it but he did notice how Tim's eyes grew even _softer_ as he shook his head and said, 'Come here kiddo, give me a hug.' With that, Dick's hand slipped from Bruce's shirt as he was enveloped into a tight hug by his older brother, body curved and wings tucked down so as to get as close as possible. 

Tim hugged him tightly and as Dick snuggled in, he could see his second oldest's resolve melting, and the two shared a look. Because dear god, Bruce could always be counted to keep a clear head and put his foot down when necessary but that resolve all but disappeared when it came to Dick, because it was just plain _impossible_ for him to refuse the boy of anything.

Like many times, he found himself counting on Tim to remain steady headed and help him out because if Dick managed to sway his brother too, there was absolutely no way in hell they were getting on that plane.

It seemed Bruce might as well go ahead and start unpacking, judging on the slow growing tensity of Tim's shoulder and how harried his reassurances had become.

It was then that Alfred, _good, kind, sweet old Alfred,_ decided to step in with an incredulous shake of the head as he placed a rugged hand atop the clinging boy's head. 'Come along, sirs. You should be on your way by now, we wouldn't want you to have gone through this whole ordeal and then slouch back here due to a missed flight.' Bruce watched silently as Alfred gently but firmly separated the two and picked his youngest up, settling him in his arms, surprising the billionaire. Alfred had refrained from picking up any of Bruce's children, and the last he could remember him doing so was to himself when he was a newly orphaned child. His children had mostly entered his life at the very end of their childhood years and were either overly determined to prove their toughness and independence or scared/repulsed by touchiness so the old gentleman never really had a chance but he'd never even did that with Dick before his abduction. Vividly, Bruce wondered if the man had secretly always wanted to and refrained so as not to upset any of them or if this was just a one time thing.

A shoulder bumped into his and Bruce blinked down to see Tim holding out his briefcase with a grimace, eyes trained on his youngest brother with what Bruce could decipher as guilt. He understood. He felt it too. In a daze, he took the briefcase with a polite, 'thank you' and stepped towards his Butler and charge, lifting a hand to weave through Dick's black hair, gaze frozen on his face, which was screwed up in misery as he cried. To his surprise, Alfred stepped back, his arm winding around the squeamish child so as to keep him still. 'We shall see you, sirs, on the 24th of October and not a day later or sooner. Now, I strongly advice you both to be on your way or else we shall be caught up here all day.'

Tim sighed miserably and nodded. Alfred was right. If they indulged anymore tears or so much as reached out to offer the child a reassuring pat, he'd latch on and refuse to let them go. Already, he was struggling unhappily in the old butler's arms, limiting his movements so as not to hurt him but aggravating them enough to get the point through. The teen straightener his tie and called out, 'See you soon Dickie', before exiting the kitchen. Bruce licked his lips and forced himself to turn away, ignoring how the strings of his heart tugged painfully as Dick began to openly sob again, his cries loud and heartbreaking. 'Cassandra and Damian shall be back from school by 3, Alfred. We'll call you by then.' as a good bye before hurrying out, forcing his feet not to stop as Dick wailed.

 _He'll be fine. He has Alfred. Trust Alfred to take care of him._ And he did. Alfred had taken care of all his boys and his daughter too, and had done a remarkable job of knowing just what is right to do at what moment. Dick was in safe hands and was going to be okay, even if neither of them believed in that now. He grimaced as he slid into the back seat of the company car next to Tim. He hoped this week goes by fast. He was already looking forward to his return.

But he couldn't return if he never went. So, he lifted his chin and politely asked the driver to take them to the airport, forcing himself not to look back as they drove away from the manor, away from his shaken up youngest.

It would be okay. Dick would he well taken care of.

*****************************************************

Dick stared at his feet, curling his toes miserably as he zoned out, lost in his thoughts. Once Alfred had decided that there was no longer a risk that Dick would break away and rush after his father and brother, he'd sat him down on the counter with a soothing pat on his head and a gentle, 'settle down lad'. He'd went back to bustling around the kitchen, leaving the child to his own thoughts for a while.

And all his thoughts were negative.

He didn't understand what had happened. He'd been getting better. He'd thought he'd healed. And now that Tim and Bruce had left, insecurities and fears had gripped him and had sunk their claws deep within him. He wasn't sure exactly what fear was more overpowering. 

For one, he was worried. What if they got attacked? What if someone attacked his family and he wasn't there to protect them? Granted, they'd been the ones protecting him so far but Dick had been prepared to jump in in case of an emergency or an attack. He wouldn't be able to do that now. He didn't even know where they'd gone to.

But then there was another fear bothering him. The one which he hadn't seen come to light yet. What if they didn't come back for him? What if they had left as a way to get away from him? He'd probably pushed them further away by his overly clinginess and gross tears. They'd all but toppled over each other to get away from him when Alfred had pulled him away.

A hand touched his chin and Dick startled as his eyes shot up to see Alfred's kind one. The man gently pulled his lip away from his teeth and squeezed his shoulder.

'I am aware that you are....preoccupied with the current situations but I was wondering if you would like a distraction?' 

Despite just freeing his bottom lip, it was caught between his teeth again as he gnawed on it and mumbled, 'Like what?'

'Well, I've had a few requests for my cookies in the past week or so by your siblings but I have found myself occupied with work. But I do not like putting off such tasks so would you mind helping me make a batch or so? I'm afraid I am not as zestful as I used to be.'

The refusal which had had been dancing on his tongue died away in an instance at the last sentence and Dick found himself nodding mutely. Alfred was asking his help and he had learnt from both observing and from tales from his family that the man was more stubborn than all his siblings combined when it came to requesting assistance. How could he possibly turn him down?

The smile he received in response was small but genuine, lifting the dark cloud hanging on him just a bit and he hopped off the counter to land on the balls of his feet, wrapping his arms around himself as he looked up his psuedo Grandfather, waiting for instructions.

Talon knew a lot of things but how to make delightful sugary treats was definitely not on the list.

It was weird. Since his rescue, he'd realised he didn't know a lot of things that his family deemed important. He knew how to knot ropes in the most impenetrable bonds but he didn't know how to tie shoe laces. He knew what parts of a body to attack first so as to weaken his opponent but he didn't know what 'ice cream' had been until Cassandra had snuck him some his first month here. He knew every possible weapon that could be used on him but he didn't know exactly what was the function of the immobile stuffed creatures on his shelf were suppose to do. Tim had said that they were toys. Just something people liked to hold because they were soft and comforting. Talon had tried it. But he had still been confused and unsure and eventually, he'd just put them away, not liking not knowing how to handle something.

He hated not knowing what to do. His family wouldn't hurt him for his failures but the court had. And those memories and the pain they had inflicted on him still lived fresh in his mind, creeping up on him when he least expected it.

Alfred had seemed to finally catch on to the discomfort the boy was in but instead of directly confronting him, he took to distracting him. After months of living with the child, he had realised that regressions and bad days were to be expected and today was clearly one of those days. It would not do so to force the boy to reflect on his inner turmoil when chances are that those feelings were just as confusing to him as they are to others. Instead, he took to the method he had used before as well, when Dick had anxiously been awaiting the return of his family from parole and would need to be distracted so as not to fall into a spiral. 

Unconsciously, this altered version of their youngest still had some of his old characteristics that his loved ones were so fond of.

'Master Dick, would you be so kind so as to grab the sugar from the top shelf? I am not particularly fond of the stool. It makes me feel rather tiny when I use it.'

Dick nodded, grateful to have something to do. He stalked over to where Alfred had pointed and craned his head up to stare up the columns of shelves until he spotted the red container with the label _sugar_ sprawled in neat cursive writing. Taking a few steps back, he ran at the shelf before springing up to his toes, spreading his wings as he soared up just enough for him to grab the container before he dropped down, his incomplete mutation barely allowing him the ability of flight. Still, it got the job somewhat done and he stalked back over to Alfred, clutching it to his chest with both hands so as not to drop it. He placed it carefully next to the bowl and whisk Alfred was currently sanitizing and smiled shyly as he recieved qa 'thank you'.

'Now would you get the butter and about 4 eggs from the fridge as well as a slack of butter. Be careful not to drop them please, I'm quite proud of how spotless I've managed to make the kitchen floor.' 

It was how the next few minutes went by, with Alfred politely requesting him to fetch ingredients from various positions in the kitchen and him feeling a tiny almost unearned feeling of accomplishment at each thanks and upturn of the lips.

When he had bought the final ingredient which was three bars of chocolate, Alfred beckoned him to stand in front of him as he handed him an egg. Dick's brows furrowed as he carefully pinched him in his fingers delicately so as not to shatter it. Gentle and calloused hands wrapped around his smaller ones and guided them towards the large bowls and Dick stood on his toes so as to be able to peek into the bowl and he spotted three cracked eggs already in the bowl. 'Gently crack the egg against the brim of the bowl. Gently now, we don't want to get any shells in.'

Dick pursed his lips as he allowed Alfred's hands to guide him to the bowl and gently tapped it against the bowl. He startled slightly as the white cover of the egg cracked and egg white began to drip from it. Alfred nudged his hands towards the bowl and tapped his fingers with his. 'Dig your fingers into the shell just a little bit. Just a bit and gently crack the egg's shell away.' 

'Uh...'

'It's alright, lad. Don't worry to much about it.' 

He focused intently back on the egg and did as he was told, a victorious grin splitting his face as it separated it and egg white and yolk dropped from it into the bowl. But he may have gotten a little carried away as a few tiny specks of the shell managed to slip past him and splatter in the bowl. His grin slipped away as he drew his hands back, hunching his shoulders and drawing his wings around him, peeking up at Alfred through his fringe. 'I'm sorry....'

'It's quite alright, Master Dick. Easily fixable.' he watched as Alfred fiddled around with a fork and skillfully extracted the lone pieces from the mix. 'No need to worry about it. Why don't you break those chocolates into tiny pieces and fill them in a bowl as I get the dough ready? Shouldn't take long and then we can move on to the more entertaing part.'

He'd messed up. God, why did he ruin everything? Not wanting to mess up even further, he slipped towards the side of the counter where the colourful bars of chocolates were scattered around. He was extra careful as he peeled the wrapper away to reveal smooth milk chocolate and he carefully pinched the edge of it and pressed down it gently, enough to make it _snap._

They worked in harmonical silence as they worked, the only sound accompanying the kitchen would be the _splat_ of the spatula and the snaps of the chocolate bar as they did their respectful task. 

When he was done, the pads of his fingers was covered in the sticky chocolate and he absentmindedly stuck it in his mouth, eyes widening as the sweetness and smoothness surged over his tongue. He let out a startled noise of appreciation as he stuck his thumb in next to lick the chocolate off that.

'You can have some pieces of chocolates. We have enough to go around.'

Dick looked at him in surprise and back at the bowl which had now turned into a sticky brown mop of something he couldn't understand. 'Aren't they for the cookies?'

'We have enough to go around. Go on, it was quite a tradition for you to snack on them whenever you used to help me in the kitchen.'

Had he? Was he as clueless as he felt now? If he was, he didn't see how he could have been much help.

'It was the thought that counted, sir.' Alfred replied, and Dick startled as he realised that he'd said his thoughts out loud. That was...new. 'I was rather fond of your company and chatter.'

'Oh...'

Silence enveloped them again until Alfred cleared his throat and nudged the bowl of chocolates towards him. 'Take some lad. But please, do refrain from telling your siblings about this snack. I'm afraid I do not let the family indulge their sweet tooth often and they would feel as if favouritusm has come into ploy if they got to know you had chocolate.'

Dick nodded solemnly before plucking some jarred pieces out and sticking them greedily in his mouth, watching as Alfred tipped the chocolates into the mixture and began rolling the dough around it so as to spread them evenly. It looked as if it was taking him quite some of his strength to do so as he rolled the heavy mixture around and Dick shyly stepped up to offer his help.

'Can I?'

'Of course, my dear boy. Do be careful so as not to splatter. I shall go and fetch us some gloves for the next task.' 

Dick rotated the dough with the spatula, surprised to find that it took more strength then he'd initially thought it would do to do so. He stood on his tiptoes as he wrapped the dough around the chocolate until all the little bits were evenly spread out. The result that looked back at him actually looked quite appetizing then he'd expect. He looked over his shoulder to make sure Alfred wasn't back and quickly snagged a piece of the gooey dough and snuck it in his mouth, delighted by the burst of sugar and gooey mixture of chocolate melted in his mouth. 

'Master Dick, would you put these plastic gloves on your hands? I don't want the dough to get stuck in your nails, it's difficult to get it out later.'

Dick turned around and stuck the bit of dough left to the side of his cheek, making himself look as innocent as he could make himself appear. He took the gloves and with some difficulty as he stretched the slippery material over his hands.

'And you have a bit of dough on your chin. You might want to wipe it off.' Dick startled and shuffled his feet but Alfred didn't look mad. On the contrary, he looked fond.

'Come stand with me here now. What we're going to do now is scoop some dough and mould it into a neat round ball.' Dick took his place next to him and observed Alfred's movements closely. The two fell into a rythm as they scooped and moulded and Dick felt some of the darkness looking over him slipping away. If he ignored the events of the morning, this was actually a good setting. In the warm and sunny kitchen, he was standing shoulder to....well, arm, with his surrogate grandfather and molding a gooey mixture of egg, chocolate and flour into clean round spheres. It was nice. 

It was pleasant.

So why couldn't he shake how gloomy he felt? He didn't like feeling like this. For the past few weeks he'd been doing _good._ He'd been happy!

Why couldn't he go back to that?

The cookie balls slowly stacked up on the baking tray, his squiggly ones contrasting with Alfred's smooth ones. His movements were slower than the older man, both because Dick was lost in thought and also because Alfred had much more practice then him.

He was so lost in thought that he didn't even hear the sound of the front door opening or the footsteps approaching him, overly lost in his thoughts. It wasn't until someone covered his eyes did he startled and turned around sharply, wings puffing out so as to protect Alfred from any possible harm as the darkness that had obscured his vision fell away to reveal-

'Jason!' Dough forgotten, he jumped at his older brother, winding his arms and legs around the man's torso and shoulders. Jason yelped as Dick's oily and messy gloved hands slid over his jackets but he hugged him back, one hand patting his little brother's head.

'Hey there kiddo. You really missed me, huh?'

'Mhm.' he hummed into Bruce's shoulder, soaking in the warmth and safety his older brother gave him. 'Alot.'

There was silence before Jason turned his head to bury his nose in Dick's hair and murmured, 'I missed you too, bud.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> JASON'S BACK!! I missed writing him
> 
> Also, kudos to Tim for being a logical big boy.
> 
> Fulfilled another request. Next chapter's gonna focus on Damian, Jason and Dick.
> 
> And I'm afraid our Talon is going to have a tough week till his family is back together with him so get ready for hurt and some what comfort. Depends on my muse and mood.
> 
> Again, thanks for the support as usual. Means so so so so much.


	7. A shaky road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: body horror, self harm. PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU'RE UNCOMFORTABLE

It was early. Much too early. Talon was aware that the butler awoke as soon as the sun rose but today, he could hear no noise that indicated the man was up and bustling. Though, that may be due to the static in his head, blocking his hearing sense as it forced a tunnel like concentration on his own thoughts.

His wings- _stupid, humongous freak of a wings-_ stuck out and nudged into his arms, the pinian dropped, as if sending their owner's misery.

Good, they should be as miserable as he was. They had done this to him. They'd made him a freak, an outsider.

They were the reason he was here when Talon's guardian was miles away.

He'd overheard them. He'd overheard the siblings talking amongst themselves when the oldest one had tucked him into bed last night. About how his wings were interfering in his life, recounting the times when he'd be taken along for trips if he seemed upset enough at their departure. He'd wondered why his guardian hadn't taken up that option when he'd left four days ago. As he continued to eavesdrop, he'd found out why.

His wings.

These worthless lumps that served no function other then to serve as a reminder of what had been done to him, about how the court had succeeded in making sure he was always a prisoner to them.

It was a sobering realisation. Physically, he was free. The court was demolished, their practices erased and therir victims free. Talon no longer awoke to stabbing pain somewhere in his body that hadn't quite healed up from his last fight or punishment. He no longer shied away from touch and no longer associated smiles with cruelty. He laughed, he ate, he slept comfortably and he loved. 

Talon was getting better. On his way to being normal. Like his family.

But that wasn't the purpose of him, was it? The court planned everything and the very basis they practiced their crimes on was imprisonment. To trap their servants in their state, to make sure that they would forever be reminded of who they were, _what_ they were.

They trapped some by freezing them in a state of unconsciousness, letting decades slip by without so much a flutter of an eye. They trapped other through the means of fear, inflicting pain upon them and their cherished ones till they broke. 

For him.... they'd trapped him in his own body.

It had been....quite a few months since his return. Almost six if he wasn't mistaken. And yet, he'd never left the safety of the manor, had never as so much as peeked above the high walls that guarded the house to see what was on the outside. The only time he had a glimpse of the rest of the world were the two or three charity galas that had been held in the ballrooms and guest rooms, while Talon was safely hidden away in his room.

There was a part of him that was perfectly content with this lifestyle, with having only his family and their trusted friends as company, with being shielded from the cruelties that might await him outside and being cocooned in a safe net by his family's protectiveness.

Another part of him longed for the outside. Sometimes, he found himself watching enviously as the other inhabitants of the manor flitter in and out as they please, pausing only to shrug on warm coverings and call him a goodbye and he longed to be one of them. To be able to walk out of those gates without any fears of never returning. His family went in and out as they pleased.

He....could not.

He had been told to stay within the walls of the manor, safe from the outside's world's watchful eyes and prying hands, within his first month. It had been one of the few rules he had to follow and he had more then happily indulged them. 

He'd thought his family kept him within these walls to protect him. Now, he wondered if it was to protect themselves instead.

He didn't fit in. How would they explain a child with huge red and bronze wings? How would they handle him in public situations when at any given time, he could malfunction and break down over something minuscle or worse, _attack_ someone? He had to be watched twenty four seven, his family constantly taking shifts to keep an eye on him and the only time he was left truly alone and away from earshot was when he was put to sleep and even then, he knew the family checked up on him the entire night. He was not to be trusted.

He could never have a normal life. He could never go to school like Damian and Cassandra did, he could never go out for trips and lunches with Bruce like Tim did, he couldn't go out for simple errands like Alfred did and he could never make friends and spend time with them like Jason did. Hell, he couldn't even wear a _shirt_ like _normal_ people. Like an animal, he was to remain caged and bare.

He was a freak. He would always be a freak. He would never be _normal._

All because of these _stupid wings._

He hated them. He hated them almost as much as he hated the court. He'd used to be scared of them, too terrified and traumatised to so much as to think of them with any other negative emotion. But his PTSD had transitioned him from fear to anger now and he hated hated hated _hated_ them. 

He grabbed a tuft of feathers and _yanked_ them off. Prickling pain burst through his wings and ran from his bones to his body and tears pricked his eyes as tiny specks of blood began to ooze from the follicles. Good, he deserved pain. The court had inflicted pain on him so much, it had began a normal part of his life, a routine, something he'd become so used to that in a way, he'd found comfort in it. And then he had come here, where there was no harm or pain bought to him and he did wonder if that had played a hand to his confusion and spiralling as he tried to get back on his feet and rediscover himself. 

Talon didn't like pain. He didn't. It made him miserable. But there had been a point during his beatings and tortures where he'd go numb. When despite the lashes splitting his skin, the acid and fire licking at his body and the coldness and blackness that greeted him when they'd used water torture on him, somewhere near the middle, he'd go numb and feel nothing. The pain didn't seem as bad because his mind was blank. His mind was quiet.

He wanted that again. He wanted his thoughts to _leave him alone._

He grabbed more Tufts and clumps of feathers from his wings and continued to pull them out, tears dripping down his cheeks and on to his bare stomach as he continued to _rip_ his wings apart. 

He wished he could pull his wings out but he'd....done it when he'd first woken up in the court with wings. He remembered thinking that it was a mistake, just his imaginations running wild or hoping against hope that they were just stick ons. (Back before he relaised the court had rid all his memories of his previous life, he'd assumed that he'd just acted out like that out of rebelliousbess. The grandmaster had always said he was troubk and sometimes they had wodmereed if he was truly worth it).He remembered losing himself and going crazed as he had scratched and clawed at them until eventually, he'd ripped them off his body. Which had been a huge mistake. They were a part of his body, had veins and muscles and bones connecting them to the rest of his body and he'd bled out as the other laughed at him and until he passed out from the pain. Within a month, his stupid renegading properties had restored them to their full glory.

It was pain like he'd never felt before.

And he didn't think he cared about it anymore. 

He scratched at the bare skin showing up from beneath the feathers, his nails spreading the blood _everywhere._ The sensitive skin ripped apart into deep cuts as he ferociously scratched at his wings and left behind wounds that, to his anger, would heal within a few days.

He hated it. He hated his wings. He hated his renegading abilities. He hated the yellow specks in his eyes. He hated the black veins peeking over his cheeks and neck and arms. He hated himself.

He wished he'd died. He wished he'd never been saved. He wished he wasn't such a disappointment and a freak.

He didn't know how long he worked on decapitating his wings but by the time his minds caught up with his actions, his nails and fingers were caked with blood and the carpet had splatters of it. He was reaching it, he could feel it. Soon the pain would take the back seat and he would be left numb and his thoughts would _shut up._

Maybe he was more far gone then he realised because he didn't hear the sound of light chatter and clatters that meant the rest of the family was waking up. He didn't hear the approaching footsteps and didn't even notice Damian stepping into his room until he bellowed, 'RICHARD!'

Dick gasped in shock and jumped to his feet, wincing as his bloodied and tarted wings bumped against the wall and hung limply against his side. The pain and sudden jolt of surprise took over him before he realised because suddenly, a wave of panic had gripped him and he growled as unwanted hands touched him. Snarling, he jumped back and kicked his foot out, relieved when it thrusted against something soft. He heard an oomph and a loud thud but he couldn't decipher where it had come from. His wings were limp and a torn fragment of it was obscuring his view. He saw nothing except for blood and torn skin and _red_ and felt nothing except for anger and fear. He thrashed around, slipping past hands that tried to grab him again and snarling as he viewed his opponent, to gone to register him as his brother.

Behind him, a loud bang echoed through the room, followed by a string of loud swears and curses and now there were _two_ pairs of hands grabbing at him, trying to restrain him. He buckled and thrashed in their hold, shrieking angrily as his wings weakly beated behind him.

'Fuck, fuck, Dick! What the hell did you do?!?' 

He didn't know. He didn't know what they were angry about. He didn't really know who they were. But he knew _he_ was angry and that meant enough for him now. He wanted to fight. He wanted to let the numbness take over. Why wouldn't they let the numbness take over him?

'Shit- Dick stop!'

'Richard, it's us!'

_'Stop thrashing.'_

'Umph!'

'This isn't working- Damian, get a syringe!' 

Syringe? What syringe? He momentarily stopped thrashing and twisting but it seemed that had been all his opponent needed because suddenly, he was pinned to the floor, his cheek rubbing roughly against the carpet and an uncomfortable weight pressing in to his back. He screeched loudly, beating his legs against the carpet and trying to angle his foot to slam it into his captor so as to free themselves.

'Oof- I don't want to fight you, kiddo. Just- _argh-_ calm down.'

Talon balled his hands into fists and tried to free his wrists from the hold of his enemy. He wanted to fight. He wasn't going down so easily.

'Fuck, Damian quick! In his neck?'

'His neck?!?'

'You got a better idea brat?!? I can't free his arm, he's already tried to claw my eyes out.'

'But-'

'Do it!'

Talon's head was pulled up by his hair, the grip somewhat tight as he began to furiously shake his head, trying to free it before his chin was gripped tigher and his movements ceased. His eyes darted around wildly, unseeing and cold as he continued to bare his teeth at the enemies until he felt a prick in his neck and something cold sliding in.

A moment later, his senses began to dull. His thrashing grew weaker as his body grew heavy and his lids fluttered. The restraining hands slipped away and were instead replaced with gentle touches and words as Talon began to slip in to the darkness that had began to creep in, welcoming the numbness that followed.

'It's okay, Dickie..... I've got you now-'

He could vaguely feel himself being craddled, could feel the soft irregular bumps as he was carried, the comfortable support, the cold snap of something on his wrists but none of that seemed as pressing as the darkness.

He let himself go.

_Numb_

~~~~

Dick came around slowly, cheek pressed against something soft. He snuggled against it, breathing in the comforting smell of it. He furrowed his brows as he tried to pin what exactly it was.

Aah. Alfred's fabric softner. That's what it was.

Good. That meant he was home. Safe. Even if his body felt as if it had been beaten with a baseball bat and as if someone was driving a bulldozer around his brain and jamming it into his skull.

He wondered what had happened to him as he rubbed his cheek against the scratchy cover. What had bought this on-

Oh.

Oh god.

_What had he done?_

He'd attacked his brothers. _Again._

He had to fix this.

Opening his eyes, he braced himself to sit up and for the pain it was sure to bring. He moved to lift his arms so as to lift his upper body only to realise-

-he can't.

He blinked in surprise and jingled his wrists, eyes widening as he realised he was _handcuffed_ to his bed.

He bit his lip as panic began to stir deep in his stomach and his mind ran a thousand miles a minute. He'd never been restrained by his family before with actual bounds. Everytime he'd accidentally lost control or acted out, they'd held him down with their own hands, restricting but gentle.

These handcuffs were nothing like them. They were cold. They made him feel alone. Like a criminal.

Had they given up on him? Had he gone too far? Should he-

'Hey.' a voice wavered over to him and he tensed his shoulders as he lifted himself as much as the handcuffs would allow to crane his head over his shoulder to catch a glimpse of who had walked in. He knew that if he struggled hard enough, he could free himself but he didn't want to anger his brothers. At least not more than he seemingly already had. 'You're awake.'

'Jay?' he startled at how strained and choked up his voice was. Jesus, how hard had he screamed to make his voice sit so bad? He must have been asleep for a while and the fact his renegation hadn't restored his voice box to top notch yet. The fact he couldn't see Jason and read his body language and it was making him more nervous then he thought it would. Unconsciously, he began to struggle again, his jaw tight with tension as he jangled his handcuffed wrists. 'Jason-'

'It's okay pup. Relax and I'll take these cuffs off, okay?'

'Why- I don't....'

'I had to.' the bed dipped as a warm weight settled near his stomach and a gentle hand settled on his lower back. Dick felt his shoulders tense just a bit as the gentle touch sent uncomfortable spikes of pain to his shoulders. 'You wouldn't calm down and for a tiny kid, you know how to pack a punch.'

'I- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Jay-'

'I'm not mad. At least not about the jabs. We'll talk about the rest after we're done patching your wings up.' 

'We?' a snotty voice called from the doorway and he heard Jason groan.

'Ugh, can you not be condescending for one minute Damian?'

'Can you not be incompetent for one minute, Todd?'

'My wings-?' Dick interrupted, squirming in his bounds. 'I'll heal.'

'We're well aware.' Jason cut him off, his voice just a bit icy. 'But you messed yourself up bad and I'm not waiting around for days until you heal. Alfred already stitched your torn tendrils up. Just have to put some salve on your cuts and some gel.'

'And bandages. Tt, you continue to shock me with your inco-'

'Say the word _incompetence_ and I swear I'll hang you from your ankles from this window.'

'....I would use more advanced words but I was worried your tiny brain would not be able to comprehand them.'

'You're one to talk about tiny, midget.'

Dick had come to enjoy his brothers bickering but he was getting sick of lying on his stomach and not being actually able to see his family so to subtly catch their attention, he jangled his wrists again to make the cuffs clang. Their bickering immediately cut off and Jason patted his back, 'Alright kid, I'm going to unlock the cuffs, okay? I don't know what exactly took over you in the morning but I can't have you attacking yourself or anyone so if you're jumpy, communicate. And....if you get violent again, I'll have to restrain you and I really don't want it to come to that?'

Dick pursed his lips at Jason's hard voice as he nodded. Yup, he'd definitely messed up.

Keys slipped into the cuffs and a second later, they came lose and Jason pulled them off before making his way to the other side of the bed and undoing the other pair and then threw both of them to the side. Dick gratefully bought his hands up to the side of his head and pushed himself up into a sitting position. Gingerly, he bought his wings to his side so as to take in their state over his shoulders and his eyes widened as he took them in. He.... hadn't realised how badly he'd effed them up. 

Someone rubbed his shoulder as Jason sat in front of him and Damian took a seat behind him. Dick guiltily eyed the bruises and the cuts on his face. 'Did I-?'

'Nope, don't worry about it. This is all from parole last night. The only harm you bought on me is interrupting my sleep. I only went to bed at 5 and your meltdown happened not even two hours later.'

'To be fair, you have a fully functional apartment and there was no real need for you to grace us with your unwanted company.' Damian sniffed and Dick heard the _pop_ of a lid being removed.

'You know exactly why I'm staying over brat. Shut it. Get to work.' 

'Do not order me around.' the third brother grumbled but he gently took the end of Dick's left wing and the ten year old jumped as a cool burning substance was rubbed on to what he assumed was a deep cut. He tensed his shoulders and fluttered his wings, fidgeting at the pain. He leant to the side, trying to get away from the mixture of salve and gel being rubbed on his wings but Jason gripped his arms and shook his head at him disapprovingly. 'No running away.'

' I don't need this.' he complained softly and played with his sweatpants. 'I'll heal. Not necessary and...this hurts '

'Well, if we leave them unattended, they'll burn till that day and I do not want your feathers to regrow in a crooked manner or have one of your follicles blocked up completely.'

'Not possible.' he informed Damian and whimpered as Damian moved from his lower part of the wing to the upper part. 'Ow....'

'Dick, no struggling. We're getting you patched up.' Jason ordered sternly, even as he ruffled his hair kindly. 'If you need to, you can hold on to me.'

'Hurts...'

'Sorry kiddo. Gotta patch you up for your own sake and for the others. Cass and Alfred were pretty shaken up seeing you like this.' Jason lifted one arm and beckoned Dick to lean against him, which the child eagerly did so. 'And I think we need to talk about what happened.'

Dick felt his grimace deepen and he hung his head. 'I don't know.'

'Richard, please do not lie to us. This morning has been trying enough as it is.' 

Wow, guilt could plunge into your heart deeper then a steak knife. 

'We want to help you. We don't like seeing you hurt. If something had upset you to the point of inflicting harm upon yourself, it should be discussed.'

'For once, I agree with Demon spawn- oh no, shush come here.' his snarky comment was interrupted by the drop of his voice in to a soothing rumble as he pulled Dick completely in his lap at the child's insistent beating of his feet as Damian cleaned a particularly bad wound. He shared a look with Damian over the kid's head as he patted his shoulder, grimacing at the torn and limp way his wings still hung. Jason had seen much worse wounds, had gotten much worse injuries but seeing his youngest brother hurt didn't sit right with him. 'Look, I know this is hard but if there's something bothering you, we can help you or at least try to make it a little better. You've been doing so good lately, what bought this episode on?'

'I didn't mean to. I'm sorry.'

'We're not chastising you, Richard.' Damian added, his voice kinder then Dick had ever heard. 'You do not need to keep apologising. But please talk to us. It might take your mind off the pain too.'

'I....bad.'

'I bad? What do you mean kiddo? You're not bad. Granted, you went a little crazy and all ninja on us but that doesn't make you bad.'

'I'm...' Dick gripped Jason's shirt tighter as he tried to think of how to phrase his words correctly so as to get his thoughts through. 'I'm not right...Urgh!' 

'Ssh, ssh. Keep talking? How are you not right?'

'Because- because I was good! I felt good! But then I feel bad...I keep messing up and hurting. What's....wrong with me?'

He received no reply for a while, the feeling of bandages wrapping around some parts of his wings slightly distracting him from the silence. It was finally broken by Damian saying, 'Though that was confusing....I assume that you are referring to the journey of recovery.'

'Poetic much?'

'Shut up Todd.' the younger grunted, in a way that was akin to his father. 'As I was saying.... Richard, it is not as easy as you may think. It is normal to relapse and have bad days and bad thoughts.'

'Proof of how Demon spawn is soft for you. If it was any of us, we'd be getting snob remarks of being weak. But.... he's right, kiddo. Recovering isn't a straight line. It's all....jumbled and messy. You would think you'd transition from bad, less bad, neutral, good, great, perfect. But it's just not like that. Life's not as easy as we would like so this relapse you're so worried about is kinda....normal. You're not bad. You're just recovering. You're normal.'

Dick's hopes had lifted with Jason's speech but now he felt sour again. He pressed his eyes into Jason's shoulders as he mumbled. 'I'm not normal.'

'Dick, this whole thing is perfectly expected.'

'No, I'm not.... I'm not like you. I'm a-a freak.'

'Richard!' Dick jumped at his brother's appalled and stern voice and Jason's arms tightened around him. 'That is not true. Whatever bought this on?'

'Look at me!' Dick snapped and to emphasis his point, he lifted his wings a little, gritting his teeth as the bones ached. 'I have wings! I'm not allowed to leave the house! I can't go anywhere or- or do anything I should be able to! I'm not- I'm not normal.' 

There it was. The self hatred and depression that he'd been desperately trying to juggle was all out in the open now and this surge was even stronger then last time. ' I don't belong. Everyone knows that. That's why I'm hidden away.'

'No, that is absolutely not true.' Damian admonished firmly, shaking his head furiously as he forced his hands to remain gentle and steady so as not to aggravate the child even more. In front of him, he saw Jason's jaw clench as the oldest of the siblings internally groaned at the realisation that he would have to talk to Bruce about how their protectiveness was causing a toll on Dick's emotional being to the point of physical harm. 

God damnit, just when he thought he could go around avoiding the man for at least a few months more. He'd been planning on getting up and leaving as soon as the replacement and the old man returned because while Red hood and Batman may have gone back to working together since their last big fight, Jason was not ready to be on speaking terms with his guardian yet. 

Seems like that was what was going to happen though. Damn his younger siblings for always getting themselves in some kind of situation that required his intervention. Sometimes, he honestly wondered if Bruce had bought them in their lives so that Jason's protective tendencies would come into play and they'd be forced to smoothen their relationship for the sake of the kids.

'Richard, I do not know how we managed to convey that we were keeping you hidden away due to....embarrassment, but that theory is simply incorrect. We assumed, perhaps wrongfully so, that you would not be comfortable being out in public yet but we only sheltered you so as to not hurt you. That being said, we do not...plan to keep you cooped up here forever. I do not know what's our plan but we shall come up with a solution that allows you to join the rest of the world when you're ready.'

'I....ready?'

'No, not yet.' Jason refused, shaking his head firmly when Dick turned back to him in surprise. It was rare for him to be refused something, especially by Jason, of all people. 'I'm sorry kid, I know it's frustrating when other people tell you what seems right for you but in your case, I know for a fact that you're not ready. If you feel cooped up, I can take you with me to the park or something at night time-'

'-night time?!? This is _Gotham,_ Todd-'

'Thanks for the clarification, Gremlin. I'll obviously be there. People don't expect me to act like a helpless little rich kid, I'm from Crime alley. And it's safer to take him at night. Less people to bother us. Dick's been hidden from the public for too long and the press is going to go crazy if they spot him now. They're coming up with pretty wild theories as to why he's not been seen yet.'

'I thought Father issued a statement that Richard had been through a trying ordeal and was recovering with his family?'

'He did. But it's been months now and I'd be surprised if they weren't coming up with theories and they're pretty much starving for a glimpse of him.'

'So it's a dangerous idea to take him out.'

'Nah, it'll be okay. I'll be on watch and scare them off and if I spot a pap not backing down, I'll chuck a rock at them.'

'While unprovoked violence and childish reactions are what I expect from you, father will never allow it.'

'I don't think it'll shock you when I say that I don't exactly live on Bruce's approval and permissions.' Which was true. Jason was proud to admit that sometimes, he just did shit because he knew it would irk Bruce even if he himself disliked it.

'His wings-'

'We'll find a way.' Jason said firmly and then rubbed the back of Dick's head when his body spasmed in pain as Damian worked on a particularly messy wound. 'Hey hey deep breaths. Almost done, kiddo.'

'I don't like m' wings....ruin everything.'

'Richard, when I walked in to see you harming yourself....was it because of these- er, _thoughts?'_

In response, Dick shrugged. Now that he was actually being confronted about it, he could feel himself closing in and retreating into his walls, unwilling to admit his weakness.

Above him, Jason and Damian shared uncomfortable looks. They hated that the younger was feeling like that but what could they say? That his body was fine? That society would accept him back with open arms with his deformed body? It was a false hope he didn't want to give the child and it was a straight up lie. Whenever Dick joined the society back, he would definitely have to hide parts of himself. Saying that aloud to the kid now though would just send him deeper in his self hatred turmoil. But they didn't really have a full set plan yet that could reassure the boy. Removing the wings was not an option, that had been the first thing they'd looked into. The court hadn't just attached them like some clip ons, they'd modified his body and had added extra bones, vessels, tissues and muscles to accommodate the wings and amputating them meant they'd be putting him in serious risk. And there was always the risk that he would just eventually grow them back due to his renegading abilities, even though they weren't sure if limbs _could_ be regrown by Talons. Bruce was constantly in contact with members of the Justice league that might be able to help such as Zatarra, Hawkman, Green lantern etc. So far Hawkman had been helpful for the salve and Gel he'd provided and Zatarra had come in handy in regulating Dick's internal body so as to prevent the wings from taking up to much of his energy and limiting any risks of death due to his body not having enough resources and fluids to accommodate the extra body parts.

But none had given them any idea or hope for how to help Dick hide his wings or just remove them.

But that...was a problem for another day. For now, it was important to establish to the boy that what he'd done today was dangerous and-

'That's why you were harming your wings when I found you. You were..... trying to be normal.' Damian realised, a heavy weight dropping in his stomach when Dick nodded miserably.

'I wanna be normal....'

Jason, though feeling as horrified as Damian, allowed a small snort to slip past him. 'Buddy, this is the bat family. I don't think we categorise under normal. I mean, I'm basically an intelligent zombie-'

'-intelligent might be a bit of a stretch-'

' _Damian_ is an unusually amount of a prat and he's diabolically short-'

'-I am at an appropriate height for my age! You're the one who has freakish height!'

'....and on top of those downputters, he and Cass are child assassin's. Tim is messed up in way too many spectrums for me to list and Bruce un-ironicaly dresses as a bat every night and has a strange addictions to adopting orphans and neglected kids. None of us can really fit under the narrow line of _normal._ Except Alfred maybe but he raised Bruce so I don't know what that says about him.'

'That's not the same.' Dick mumbled into Jason's shoulder, wings trembling as Damian wrapped a bandage around his left one now. 'You're still human. I'm....not.'

'Honestly, I always said Tim was more of a pet than a brother.' Jason deadpanned, smoldering a victorious grin when Damian huffed out a reluctant laugh. 'And so what if you're not technically all human? Neither is Superman. Or Wonder woman. Or the Green Lanterns. But they're some of the most loved individuals in the world. And.....they do have to hide them selves but that's for their own safety as civilian. As heroes, they're praised and looked up to for their individuality and differences.'

'I'm not a hero....'

Jason could already feel the surge of embarrassment as he prepared to say the next few words. Dammit, he wished Demon spawn wasn't here. He'd never hear the end of this....

'You are in our eyes. You're brave and kind and gentle and that's really the characteristics the whole league falls under. Different doesn't mean bad kiddo. And it definitely doesn't mean you can go all werewolf on yourself.'

Dick looked taken aback but grateful. Damian looked a mix between constipated and as if his face was going to split from the huge grin on his face.

Dammit, sometimes he misses being an only child. No sacrificing your pride to comfort your little brother in front of your other brother who would definitely team up with your _other_ brother and torture you for the rest of your second life.

He needed to establish himself again. He took enough shit as the oldest brother as it was.

'That being said, if you ever do something like this again, I will make you cut very single blade of grass individually from the bajillions of gardens this place has until all the lawns have the same perfect sized grass. Understood?'

Dick gaped at him in shock before his mouth snapped shut and he nodded nervously, though a small smile crept up his lips. The cloud that had seemed to hang over him since Bruce's and Tim's departure was still there, hanging in the back of his mind with his insecurities but for now, they had taken a back seat and he was feeling....lighter then he had in days. 

'Or he could just scrub the bat cave's floor clean.'

'Nope. That's your punishment, Demon. And you better get to it too, Bruce is going to be back in three days.'

'You know, it'll probably anger father if you did it instead of me...'

'Trying to use my stubbornness and determination to piss your father off to get me to do chores? Good tactic, wrong idea. I might like pissing Bruce off but I like seeing you in misery equally.'

'When will you leave?' Damian complained as he finally finished up the wings and patted Dick's back as a signal. As a thank you, Dick instead buried his face into the crook of Jason's neck as the eldest arms wrapped around his waist and whispered into his ear, 'He missed you. He likes having you back.'

He couldn't see Jason's face but he _could hear_ his chesire like grin as Jason drawled, 'Oh, did he....?'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I missed writing Jason. More glad then I thought I would be.
> 
> Not much else to talk about. Pretty quick update because I was hit by sudden determination and wanted to get everything done at once. 
> 
> Hope you guys like it!!


	8. Circus brat

Dick sat on the side of the tub as he waited for it to fill up, twiddling his toes in the warm water as he waited for it to fill up. Behind him, Tim was tying his wings up behind him so as to prevent them from getting too wet. Since his and Bruce's return from their trip three days ago, Dick had been attached to them by the hip, refusing to be separated them for more then an hour, hence why Tim was the one helping him, or rather _forcing_ him to take a bath today. 

Plus, he'd gotten his ear chewed out by his father and brother for what he'd done to himself and he had a feeling Tim didn't trust his enough to leave him alone with sharp objects, which were plenty in the bathroom. 

'You okay? Not planning on jumping over me and running off to hide again, are you?'

Dick pouted and grumbled, 'I only did that once. A long time ago.'

'That was two weeks ago, kid. You did that with Alfred, and Cass and I searched for you for three hours before we finally found you curled up atop one of the Chandeliers. It was very impressive.' 

Dick shrugged and his lips twisted into a small smile. He began to swing his legs, bored as he waited for the tub to fill up and his wings to be properly covered so that he could get on with his bath. He gripped the edge of the porcelain tub tightly as he tilted back and forth, causing Tim to tut as the band that he used to tie his wings loosened. He reached forward to grip the boy's shoulder to stop his swinging.

'Dick.' he chastised gently before going back to his task. Dick sighed and craned his neck back to stare upside down at his brother. 

'Bored.' he moaned and swung his legs wildly so that some water splashed away from the tub and on the wall. Tim hid a smile and tried to remain stern. All he got back was a mischievous smile.

Little brat.

'Alright, alright. Stop fidgeting.' he let go off Dick's wings and walked out the bathroom, returning a few seconds later with his phone clutched in his hands. Pressing the power button to turn the screen on, he tapped in his password and selected the YouTube app, waiting until the 'For you' page loaded before handing the device to the boy.

'Watch something on there till I'm done.' 

'Anything?'

'Sure. Nothing PG13 though. You're too young.'

Dick rolled his eyes and turned his attention to the small screen, focusing on the previews of the videos and the colourful thunbnail as he tried to choose a video to watch. He scrawled past many videos of cute animals, videos of unsolved mysteries, random tiktok compilation. None really grabbed his attention.

By the time Tim had finished tying his wings together, he still hasn't chosen what to watch and was growing slightly frustrated. The teenager ruffled his hair as he left the bathroom again, calling out that he'd be back with the plastic wraps that would go over his wings to protect them from getting too wet and Dick hummed in reply, to lost in his own world to try and find something that actually interested him.

Irritated, he swiped downwards much quicker then before, deciding to randomly choose whatever video the screen stopped on. The blurry videos passing by finally stopped at what he realised was a lyric video for an old song that he had never heard but his attention was drawn to the video below whose thumbnail was both much brighter and granier then the one he'd landed on. Scrolling down, he frowned as he slowly formulated the English letters to words in his head until he could read the title aloud;

_The Flying Grayson's; Haly Circus, Dallas_

Grayson's....

That was....him, right? Dick Grayson. That was his name.

So that meant this was...

...his family.

He knew that he wasn't Bruce's biological son. He knew that all his siblings except Damian were adopted and he knew that he'd come from the circus, that he'd been adopted after the murder of his parents, aunt and cousin. He knew what his birth family looked like, seeing as there were two posters of them hanging in his room, one that just showered their silhouettes and another which showed a grainy picture of their faces. He'd even found a few photographs stashed away in his cupboard in a nice fancy box along with other objects he'd assumed he'd taken along with him from the circus, including a worm out elephant plushie, some colourful bangals and baby shoes.

He knew where he came from. He knew about his other family, the one that had welcomed him into this world. But that was the extent of it. The court had erased all of his early life memories and when he'd been rescued by Bruce and his siblings, he'd been too overwhelmed and confused to seek answers about his past. And then, when he'd grown comfortable..... he hadn't wanted to delve into it. He was happy. He didn't want to submerge to grief and sorrow by feeling nostalgic for people he would never get to meet again. He didn't want to get confused between his two families and _stop_ being happy.

Bruce was his father. Jason, Tim and Damian were his brothers. Cassandra was his sister. Alfred was his grandfather. He was content with that.

But....he was curious about his old family. He knew they were loving people. Or at least that's what Bruce had said the rare times they'd been bought up. He'd admitted that some people from the circus had been involved in his abduction and torture the court inflicted on them though Dick had refused to focus on them. He knew they were in jail. His family had made sure they were convicted for their part in the court.

Lost in thought, he tapped on the video, watching the screen going black as it loaded and then a second later, the video came to life. It was a shaky and blurry video, the owner clearly more distracted by the performance rather then getting the perfect video. He watched as the owner of the video zoomed in on the tiny figured who were stood on the ledge and he watched in amazement as two figures jumped from the ledge with the ease and confidence of someone who was well experienced and had done so millions of times. They grabbed on to the trapeze and swung around, their bodies folding and curling in to themselves as they grabbed each other and swung them to the next implement to grab.

The figures increased as more and more people jumped from the ledges, flying through the air and grabbing each other as the crowd cheered and the spotlights flickered magically. There were two figures that were smaller then the rest and he assumed that one of those two were him and the other was his cousin. He couldn't see any of the adults faces well, unable to make out who was his parents and who was his aunt and uncle.

At a particularly complicated twist in the air, his attention was pulled away from the video as he heard a surprised splutter. Glancing over his shoulder, he spotted Tim watching him with his mouth agape, clutching four large bags of plastic. He straightened up as Dick's eyes met his and he stepped closer to him, crouching down on one knee and placing the bags and spare bands on the floor.

'Ho-how did you find that video?'

'It just....popped up.' he paused, hesitant. Was Tim mad? He said he could watch anything but the family and him barely talked about his biological family. He'd assumed that it was because he himself never really bought them up but maybe his family didn't like talking about them either? 'Is that....okay?'

Tim shook himself out of his shock and smiled at him, though it didn't really reach his eyes. 'Yeah. Yeah of course. I don't mind. I just.....I wasn't expecting it.' he cleared his throat and hastily stood up, grabbing a plastic bag and pulling it over the wings before pulling another. 'You can continue watching if you want. I didn't mean to startled you.' 

'I don't.... really want to.' he hadn't realised it but now that he said it, he knew it was true. He didn't want to continue. Everything felt weird watching it. He felt guilty for not remembering them and bad for putting it off for so long. He wanted to know more but it hurt knowing he would never meet them again and he didn't _understand_ it because he couldn't even remember ever meeting them even though they'd played such a big role in his life and it was just so confusing-

A hand nudged his shoulder as Tim urged him into the tub, his wings confined in plastic and held together by bands. 'In you go, buddy.' 

He silently lowered himself into the water, to lost in his thoughts and overwhelmed with the bajillions of emotions rushing through him to whine or squirm like he usually would. He remembered to put the phone down on the floor before he slipped into the warm water. Tim perched on the edge of the tub as he grabbed the little bucket hanging on the edge and filled it up, lifting it up and pouring it over the boy's right shoulder to get it wet.

The two sat in silence, Dick mulling over his thoughts as Tim watched him warily. 'Hey.' he called gently, finally having enough of the silence. 'Are you okay? I didn't mean to upset you, I just got startled.'

'No, it's okay. I just-' he struggled with his words, wondering how to voice his thoughts out loud without offending his brother. '-I don't know how I feel.' 

'Okay.....why?'

'I don't remember them but....I want to.' He shrugged miserably, lifting his wings up and perching them on the edge. 'They were my family....I should remember them.'

'But you don't. And that upsets you.' Tim finished for him and Dick nodded, as he ran his hand through the water to cause small waves to be formed. 'I get that. I'm sorry you don't remember them. If it helps....I can tell you about them.'

'Really?' Dick perked up, shuffling in the water and only stopping when Tim squeezed his shoulder. 'You met them?'

'Well, no. But _you_ talked about them a lot to us and I remember alot of them. So....I can tell you about them if you stay still and let me clean your hair.' 

'Okay.' he chirped immediately, turning around to lean his back against the tub so Tim could wash his hair without having to strain his arms too much. He placed his feet on either side of Dick's body and sunk his sudded fingers into Dick's murky hair, beginning to massage the shampoo over his dirty scalp and gently untangling the tangles that had formed in his hair as he mulled over where to start. Dick sat silently but his body was tense in a way that suggested he was slowly growing impatient and Tim liked how calm he was and he really didn't want to deal with a fussy ten year old.

Dick poked at a scab forming on Tim's ankle as he waited, growing antsy and deciding to prod again until Tim suddenly started talking. 'Your mom's name was Mary Grayson. Your dad was John grayson.' Dick stopped his fidgeting and instead let his hand drop into the water, staring at it as his brother continued. 'You were part of a six person's act including your Uncle Rick and Aunt Carla and your cousin John.'

His shoulders were tense, so tense that he was afraid that they would snap like a twig. He'd wanted to know. He'd asked Tim himself to tell him about his birth family but now those mixed emotions were growing stronger and was forming an uncomfortable knot in his stomach, being overpowered by the guilt tugging at his heart. 

He didn't even remember their names properly. What kind of son was he?

He kind of wanted Tim to stop. But he couldn't. So he bit his tongue and stared at his pruny fingers.

'I....never met them. But you told me _alot_ about them. Like how your mom used to sing lullabies to you whenever you were sick. And that you really liked the smell of cinnamon because when you were three, your uncle and dad tried to make cinnamon buns for you and John and ended up dropping a jar on the floor and the carpet soaked the smell up so that it lingered for a long time. And....oh, there was an elephant that you really loved. Zitka. You used to play with her and help her caretaker clean her but you always complained about how smelly her faeces were because your dad made you help clean up whenever you acted out.'

'Zitka....' he repeated the name slowly, wracking his brain as he tried to recall why it was so familiar. He frowned and scratched at his chin irritatedly, knowing this nugget would bother him until he figured it out from where he knew it. 'Zitka?'

'She's your stuffed elephant. That's what you named her when you got it. Your mom made it for you when you for your   
fifth birthday.'

'Oh...' he hadn't known that. He barely used it now, more attached to the the weirdly shaped stuffed bear then the roughed up and dirty elephant. He felt his heart pang painfully at the realisation that it wasn't another random artefact in his room, but rather had been woven for him with love by his deceased mother and that he'd completely discarded it, only chancing it a glance before leaving it sitting on his shelf.

He'd start using that again. He'd make sure of it. It was the least he could do for the women who has loved him with her heart and soul.

'What...what else?'

'You used to get antsy when your circus was on the move, so your Uncle Ric used to play hide and seek with you in the carriages. When you weren't able to do that, he'd indulge you in hand standing competitions and when that didn't work, he'd sit and tell you stories. And he'd sneak you and John candies and biscuits and chips that he'd he'd get from random stops.'

Blood rushed through his ear, his heart pounding a mile a minute but this was a good one.....it felt good hearing these memories. It made him feel warm and fuzzy from the inside, like when Bruce would hug him or Jason would pick him up, when Tim would lay in bed next to him and talk to him till he fell asleep. It was the same feeling he got whenever Damian would slide abundance amount of food in his plate and watch cartoons with him despite finding them stupid or when Cassandra would brush her fingers through his hair to help him relax whenever he was worked up and when Alfred would call him, 'My dear boy'. 

The guilt was still there for not remembering them. The pain was there for never being able to see them again. The confusion was still there for loving people he didn't remember. But so was nostalgia. The good kind.

He wracked his brains to see if he could remember any of the stuff Tim had mentioned but he couldn't. And while that made him sad, he could tell from Tim's stories that he had been happy with them, had been loved. He was startled out of his thoughts when Tim's fingers disappeared from his hair and was replaced by a gush of warm water hitting his hair. He closed his eyes to prevent the shampoo from leaking into his eyes and asked, 'What about John? And my aunt?'

Silence before, 'Your aunt was the one who taught you how to somersault. When you were four or five. It was one of the only tricks you couldn't nail perfectly. She used to sit with you and make you hot chocolate on nights you couldn't sleep and your parents were out in a date. And she and your mom used to take you and John out for trick and treating after your shows and that was the only night you could stay up late even though you used to beg your mom to let you stay up every night for the bonfires on winter nights.'

'My mom and aunt were close?'

'From your stories, they seemed close. As close as you and John.'

'Were we the same age?'

'Two to three years older then you. You didn't talk about him enough....'

'I thought you said we were close?'

'You were, you were. It was just....hard for you to talk about him. But you told me some stuff. About how he _loved_ pineapple pizza and it drove you crazy. And that he would try to get a hold of R rated movies to watch with you at night and that you never told him but some of them really freaked you out. You told me he had as crush on Rena, the daughter of one of the clowns.'

'Oh...' his hair was clean now and he shuddered lightly as Tim pulled him out of the water and sat him on the seat so that the water only submerged his knee. Dick curled and uncurled his fingers as Tim took a pink washcloth and poured liquid soap onto it, kneading the cloth to form suds and then took Dick's wrist to rub it on his arm. 'Can you.....tell me more about my dad?'

Tim smiled at him, though it looked sad but he continued nonetheless, his voice soft as he spoke over the soft slush of the water. 'He cleaned up a lot of your wounds whenever you got injured on the trapeze. And he used to make you cheese sandwiches and carry you on his shoulders whenever you were tired. And he used to play the guitar.'

'Really?'

'That's what you told me. You used to wake up sometimes in the middle of night and hear the strums of whatever song he was playing to your mom.' 

'Mom....'

'Wanna hear more about your mom? You were really close to her.'

'Please.' he asked politely, taking the washcloth and rubbing his chest and stomach as Tim moved to his back. 

'Your mom used to make her own jewelery and you learnt how to make beaded bracelets with her. She taught you how to play board and card games from all over the world. You once got sperated from her during one of your visits in town and when she found you, she carried you all the way back home because she was so freaked out. And you told us while you were training to be Robin, you said you wanted to use a brighter red because your mom loved the colour.' 

It was a lot of information. A lot of memories. A lot of feelings. Dick only barely remembered to thank his brother before getting lost in his thoughts, mulling over his birth family. He'd seen photos of them. He knew what they look liked. But he wanted to know more, things he was sure Tim wouldn't know. He wanted to know what their laughs sounded like, what their tics were and what their habits were He wanted to know all their favourite colours and their favourite food. He wanted to know what their hugs felt like.

He wanted to know what their love had felt like. What it had felt to be Richard Grayson and not Richard Grayson-Wayne.

Because they had loved him right? The stories seem to make it clear. Tim had told him stories that he himself had shared with his older brother and the way he'd worded it seemed to make it clear that he had been very close to his family.

He had loved them. He still loved them even though he didn't remember them well. 

But....had they really loved him? He'd heard stuff. He'd heard how members of the Haly Circus had been involved with the court of owl, had basically sold him out. He'd heard how angry Jason had been, how they had had the nerve to lay eyes on him everyday, to bond with him, to get him to care for them when they had played such a big hand in his torment and transformation. He had been too far lost in his shell to question his family more, and hadn't wanted to anger his caretakers by being caught eavesdropping so he'd stayed hidden. The last thing he'd caught was that those who had been in kahoots with the court had been caught and imprisoned, courtesy of the bats.

His family had been dead more then two years before he was taken. What if they had actually been involved with the court? He didn't want to start caring for them again only to realise that they had never truly cared about him.

A towel was draped over his dripping form and Dick gripped the sides, winding it around his body. He stood up, letting Tim help him out the tub before he shrugged his brother off and walked to the dressing, waiting till the older teenager had left the room before he shed off his wet shorts that he'd worn in the bath and bundled them up to throw in the hamper. He grabbed a new clean pair of sweats and dragged them on, fumbling with the leg holes, too lost in thought to focus.

Once he'd pulled the waist band securely over his hips, he dragged his feet into his room and sat in front of Tim, lifting his wings so that his brother could unwind the bands and pull off the plastic coverings. Tim seem to pick up on Dick's weird mood but he didn't make any comments, seemingly deciding to leave him be.

He listened to the rustles of the bag being removed before he finally decided to build the courage to ask what was bothering him. 

'Tim?'

'Hmm?'

'Was my family involved?'

'Involved? In what, pup?'

'Were they involved with... _them?'_

He'd thought Tim would ask him to elaborate but his brother froze, the plastic wraps only halfway off. When he spoke next, his voice was carefully controlled, purposely not letting any of the shock or wariness he felt into his voice. 'Why would you ask that?'

Dick debated on lying and pretending it was a random question but eventually decided that he might as well be afront with it. He needed answers and he trusted his adopted family to not loathe him for his curiosity. 'I....heard Jason. And Bruce. Discussing it.' 

Tim groaned and he heard him mutter, 'Shit.' 

Dick waited for an answer but when none came other then his wings finally being free and having the salve that Hawkmen had provided them being rubbed on them, he began to fear the worst. 'Did they??'

'No kiddo. They didn't.'

'Really?' he asked doubtfully. Tim seemed unsure. Why had he seemed unsure?

'I swear. Those who were, we caught and put them behind bars. Your family wasn't one of them.'

'How would you know?' he interrupted, feeling a warm heat surge through his chest, uncomfortably stiffling and hot. 'You  
....they were gone before all this happened. You didn't investigate them.' 

A hand squeezed his shoulder and turned him around, and a gentle hand nudged his chin so that he could meet his brother's eyes, which were kinder then he had ever seen them. 

'I never met them. But I've heard your stories. And Bruce and I investigated everyone in the curcus properly and interrogated anyone who might have been involved. They all assured us your family had no idea about the existence of the court.'

'But what if-'

'-I wouldn't lie to you kiddo. I swear your family loved you with all their heart and that they weren't faking with you.' 

Dick looked at his feet as he nodded. There was still a twinkle if doubt but he decided to not obsess over it. Instead, he asked him something else that had been bothering him.

'If they didn't hate me before, do- do you think they....hate me now?'

'What? No, kid of course not. Why would they hate you?'

'I don't remember them. And I...I was- am happy, and didn't try too hard to remember them. I got a new family. I replaced them.'

'I know you can't remember but we've had this convo before. They loved you kiddo. They loved you and they would have wanted you to he happy, no matter what the circumstances. They'd probably want to kick in the teeth's of those who hurt you, something a lot of us can relate to. But they would just be happy you're okay and safe and, I hope happy.' 

'How do you know that?'

'Because.... that's what parents do. They might not like decisions or paths followed by their children but at the end of the day, all they want is for them to be happy and safe.'

'But I didn't remember them. A-and I'm still not ready to remember them completely. There's too much..... _feelings._ And they confuse me. And scare me. And-' To his frustration, his vision grew blurry as his eyes pooled with tears and he blinked slowly to keep them at bay.

Tim squeezed his shoulder, smile strained but still genuine. ' You've been through a lot, Dick. Way more then any grown ass man, let alone a ten year old, can say. And the fact that you're still willing to wake up everyday and move forward says a lot about how strong you are. So there's no shame in taking your time. If you feel like remembering the past is too painful, and that you're not yet ready to recall it, so be it. There's no shame in that.' He quickly swiped a thumb under Dick's eye, rubbing the tear away before it could drop, letting his hand stay there when the child leant into the touch. 'So you take your time, okay? And when you're ready....we can talk more about them. Who knows, maybe you'll feel up to visiting them again. They're buried close and in a private cemetery so you don't have to worry about too many people being there.'

'And if I don't?'

'Then.... we'll work something out, okay? But you're not a bad person and no one's going to hate you for wanting to take your time.'

'But what about Bruce?'

'What about him?'

'I call him...dad sometimes. And I already had a dad. Doesn't- I mean-' he sighed and pulled away from his brother, scrubbing at his eyes and wrinkling his nose at the stinging odor of the salve that had been rubbed on his wings. He toes at some rolled up socks, making a note to put some on later. It was getting cold. '-Selfish.'

'Oh. Oh, you feel bad that you consider and look up to someone else as a father when you already had one.' Tim could understand that. Very well. After all, he'd already started seeing Bruce as his father when his parents had been _alive,_ having been starved for parental affection and attention from his own parents. He remembered the conflicting emotions that had gripped him then and then the eventual death of his parents that had sent him into a mad spiral of emotions. He remembered the grief, the irrational anger at Bruce for having replaced them and having taken all his attention even when his parents had been alive, the confusion of wanting to be close to the man and be held at him and to stay as far away so as not to get hurt again. It had been an exhausting period and he'd seen Dick go through the same as him not even two years later. He'd helped him through that and Dick had been doing _good._

God, Tim hated the court with a new kind of passion every single day.

'Kiddo, there is nothing wrong with moving on. You'd get nothing being stuck on the past and moving on does not mean you've forgotten them. Being happy after something horrible happened doesn't undervalue your love for your past family.'

Dick shrugged, still not completely convinced. 'Okay....' 

Tim sighed and stood up, nudging Dick out if the door. 'You don't have to believe me now. But I'm being genuine and straight with you. You can take your time and it's not wrong to consider other people your family. You're not replacing them or disrespecting their memories. You're a kid, you need a family.'

'You're my family.' 

Tim ruffled his hair as they walked down the hallway, chancing a glance at the wings to make sure no the salve was drying properly. 'Yeah, kiddo. We are. We're a messed up, overly dramatic, sleep deprived, emotionally constipated family. Now let's go and see if Alfred has thrown out the pizza we ordered last night or not.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had this written out for more then a week now but I started another story and as usual, I'm divided between the two and my head feels burnt out. So I'm sorry if the updates get slower but I try to update every week, whether it's this story or my other one.
> 
> Thank you for reading :-) I think Tim and Dick are my favourite duo to write, their chemistry feels so easy.
> 
> Next chapter will hopefully be up soon and will finally feature Barbara and Stephanie. Stick around till then :-)))))
> 
> Thank you for reading babies. And I really love and appreciate all the nice comments you guys leave, can't tell you how happy they make me.
> 
> Till next time


	9. Bat nails

'Pleaaaase.'

'Fuck off.'

'You don't even have to move! I can do it right here!'

'I don't care. Stay away from me.'

'What are you afraid of? Your _masculinity_ being damaged? Grow up!' Stephanie waved the brush in an aggravated manner, causing a splosh of jade green nail polish to fly away and splattering on Jason's pants. The older cursed and leant over to pull a tissue paper out of the box on the bedside table and dabbing at it. Next to him, Dick shifted and pressed his knees against the oldest's stomach, his focus on the Gameboy he was currently playing Pokemon on. Jason grunted in annoyance and nudged his knees away, eventually deciding to just sit up when the kid continued to stubbornly push his knees into his stomach. He picked up his book and closed it, slumping back against the headboard of his bed in defeat and glaring at the three girls seated on his arm chairs, Cassandra's left toe in Stephanie's lap as the former coloured her nails. 'Why are you all in here anyway? This is a huge ass place, go sit in one of the spare bedrooms or something. Or better yet, go to your own home.'

'This is my home.' Cassandra answered him shortly, delicately tapping at the dried nail polish on her left hand and smiling at Barbara when she snorted. At Jason's glare, she rolled her eyes and passively stared back. 'It's your fault we're in here, you know.'

_'How?'_

'You had the kid. I wanted to see him.' 

'Take him.' Jason complained, nudging Dick's chest with his foot but pulling it away as it was batted at, Dick groaning as the momantry distraction caused his character to fumble and die. He started the game again and sent a glare at his brother as he muttered, 'Annoying' before focusing back on his game, ignoring Jason's offended gaping.

'Did you just call me annoying?' he asked, plucking the earplugs out of Dick's ear when he received no answer. 'You imposed in _my_ room, invaded _my_ bed, kept kicking _me_ with your knees, use _my_ Gameboy and _I'm_ the annoying one?'

Dick sighed tiredly, as if _Jason_ was being infuriating and paused his game only to look at the older man and say, 'My Gameboy.'

Jason resisted the urge to childishly push Dick off the bed. He wasn't the child here. Though his younger siblings liked to disrespect him as if they were _decades_ older then him.

Fucking brats. Why couldn't he have stayed an only child?

A brush swiped near his nose and he jolted back, grabbing Stephanie's flailing wrists and shoving her back. 'Stephanie, I said no! Back off before I shoot you.'

Stephanie snorted, not at all put off by the threat. It was an empty one and they all (sadly) knew it, 'You won't shoot me. One, Bruce would rather smile then let you bring in guns into the manor-'

'-I have my ways. Test me further and I'll pull one out-'

'-and two.' Stephanie continued cheerfully, bulldozing over Jason's words. '-you're too soft now.'

At that, the oldest bat narrowed his eyes, wishing Dick wasn't in the way so that he could karate kick the girl's head off. 

'I'm no-'

'Oh please.' Barbara laughed, pressing the button on her wheel chair absentmindedly. 'A year ago, you would have screamed bloody murder and tried to throw us out the window if we looked at you too long. And you definitely wouldn't have standed Dick taking over your space like that without putting up a _bit_ of a fight. You're soft now. Cut the crap Jason.'

'Language.' Cassandra warned softly, mimicking Alfred's words from before as she pulled herself to her feet, wiggling her colourful toes as she padded out the room. 'Dick's here.'

'Wait, where are you going?' Stephanie cried, momentarily distracted from tormenting jason as she turned to her best friend. Jason feverishly wondered if he should just jump out the window now and escape their unwanted company or whether that would be _too_ dramatic. 'We still have sparkles left!'

'No.' Cassandra denied firmly, ignoring her fellow vigilante's raised whines as she walked out of the room. 'Bye.' 

'Just a few sparkles! On one toe!'

She received no answer back. Groaning in dismay, she slumped back to the arm chair she'd discarded and turned puppy eyes at Barbara, who raised an unimpressed brow. Jason watched the silent stare off, one hand absentmindedly stroking Dick's hair. Finally, Stephanie broke the silence and let out a string of pleas; 

'Please, please, please-'

'No.'

'Oh come on! Do it for me! You can take it off as soon as I put it on.'

'Steph, the _only_ reason I let you put nail polish on me is _for_ you. I never like it and I never have time to take it off and you keep painting over the old chipped nails.' As proof, she raised her left hand and Jason could see that some part of the yellow nail polish had weird coloured spots and blemishes here and there. Truth be told, they looked like the nails on those cheap zombie movie's Roy liked so much.

He kept that opinion to himself though. Barbara might be physically disabled but she could still beat his ass. She was scary.

Stephanie was grumbling now as she gloomily placed the jade green nail polish down and looked sadly at the assortment of untouched bottles left. 'All these beautiful colours going to waste.'

'You shouldn't have bought so many.' Jason shrugged, glancing at Dick when the boy sighed in a defeat and jammed the buttons aggressively. 'Why did you bring so many?'

'They're not mine. They're Cassandra's.'

At that, Dick's attention finally seemed to be pulled away from his Gameboy as he paused it and looked at the blond in surprise. 'Cassie's?'

'Mhm.' 

Jason could understand Dick's astonishment, seeing as he himself was shocked. Sure, Cassandra wasn't a full blown out tomboy but she got that more then girly. She might like dancing and jewelery and cooking every now and then but makeup had never really seemed to interest her. He found it hard to imagine his little sister sitting on a window sill at midnight, painting her nails a shiny pink like all those girls in chick flicks.

Not that he ever watched any....in public.

Come to think of it, he couldn't really imagine any of the girls like that. They'd always had more of a 'boyish' persona to them which was why Stephanie's love for nail polish felt so off putting. He hadn't spent as much time with the blond as he had with Barbara and Cass but he knew from Tim and from first hand experience that she was more slam a pie in your face, choke slam you in the couch for stealing the remote and cheeky blunt type. Same with Barbara. She may be more laid back and in control then Stephanie, but she'd leaned more towards being a tomboy then the rest. Even as kids, she'd never shown interest in makeup except for putting an occasional lipstick and mascara, something the snobs at their school had turned their nose up against.

It was odd for them to take a liking to sitting patiently and colouring their nails. He said so now, 'I didn't think Cass was the nail polish hoarder type. Hell, I didn't think you three were really the makeup type....'

As soon as said it, he wished he could take it back. Both Barbara and Stephanie paused and stared and him until a slow smirk spread over their lips before the bombarding questions and accusations began.

'What are you trying to imply Jason?'

'We can't have 'feminine' interests? Is that it?'

'What, we're only allowed to be either tomboyish or girly? We can't like activities from both?'

'And what's with the disgusted tone? Do you have anything against makeup? Do you think it's too feminine?'

'Do you think guys can't-'

'Jesus Christ, you two know what I meant!' he snapped, holding his hands up before he could receive any more jabs. Stephanie didn't seem pleased with that though and raised an unimpressed brow, continuing to plough on. 'You didn't answer any of our questions. Do you think makeup is too feminine for us? Do you think makeup is only for girly girls?'

'Really? We're going to do this here?' he asked and rolled his eyes as the two simply stated back. 'No Stephanie, makeup is not just for girly girls or just for girls for that matter. Stop shoving words in my mouth-'

'Wait till I tweet this. Jason Todd will get cancelled so fast-'

'Oh for fuck's sake, I just meant I didn't know you guys were interested in makeup so much, especially Cass-'

'-are you saying-'

'-because I've never seen her buy any! Lay off me, woman.' he snapped indignantly, ignoring how Dick's wing was tickling his chin. Stephanie giggled and began to sort out the colours on the table, ordering them from darkest to lightest. 

'You're right, Cass isn't the type to buy nail polish. These are all mine, I just stashed them here so I can put them on in the cave and annoy Bruce.' she answered, smirking at Jason's approving laugh. 'And for your information, you have no idea how badass it feels to punch a crook in the nose with sparkly purple flowers painted on your nails.'

'Huh....' he didn't really know what to say to that.

'Now just imagine how badass you'll feel weilding your guns with badass black nailpoli-'

'The answer is still no.' he interrupted flatly, gently pushing Dick's wings away from his chin with a finger and glaring at Stephanie. The younger didn't seem affronted by his refusal thought and shrugged with a coy smile.

Uh oh.

'Well, desperate times call for desperate measures.'she said cheerfully, standing on her feet and stretching. 'If you don't let me put nail polish on you willingly, I'll just have to force you.'

Jason snorted in amusement, sitting up straighter on the bed and smirking at her. 'What are you going to do? Physically restrain me? Fight me? You know I can beat you in my sleep.'

Exaggeration but not really. He was a good fighter. One of the best ones actually. He wasn't afraid to play dirty. Neither was Steph but she had too much of a big ass moral compass.

Fortunately, his moral compass was pocket sized.

Instead of rising to the bait like he thought she would, she just smiled innocently and shared a look with Barbara. 'What can I possibly do to him, Babs?'

'Well.' she pretended to mull over the question, though Jason was already growing wary of the glint in her eye. He knew that glint. It was the same one he saw before she would shove him into the pool, or throw a dodge ball at him in school with all her force or make a snark comment. 'You could tell Alfred about how he regularly smokes in the art room in front of Dick.'

Jason was a trained vigilante, trained by some of the best and ruthless mentors and fighters. He'd been trained to control his body language and not react to the enemy and give himself away. Yet now, he forgot all about those lessons and the need to self control as his shoulders tensed and his mouth dropped open.

'You wouldn't....' 

Stephanie raised a brow, an infuriating smile still plastered on her lips. 'Wouldn't I?' At Jason's continued silence and suspicious glare, she glanced over her shoulder at the door and sing songed, _'Allllfreeeed....'_

Jason scrambled up and snatched her away from the door, slapping a hand over her mouth. He groaned as he dragged her away, resisting the urge to body slam her in to the floor. He'd never hear the end of it and while he may be taller stringer and broader, Stephanie was a good fighter and would no doubt get a few kicks at his testicular area in revenge.

'Fucking blackmailers.' he growled, depositing her in the arm chair. 'Who even told you?'

'Who do you think?'

He turned to glare at his little brother who gave him a shrug. When his brother kept glaring, he sat up defiantly and whined,'They're really good at getting secrets out.'

'Oh, are they?' he asked sarcastically, jumping slightly when Stephanie called out to Alfred again. He turned and kicked her ankle to make her shut her up and glared at her. 'Three fingers. That's it.'

'A full hand and I won't add any glitters or bat symbols.'

'I hate you.'

'I couldn't care less.' came the cheeky reply before she gestured at the opposing chair. 'Take a seat please.'

Jason sighed in defeat and flopped down, reluctantly letting his left hand be grabbed by Stephanie and subtly giving Barbara the bird, hiding his finger away before she could grab it and break it. Wouldn't be the first time. 

Dick unwound his legs and pattered over to stand next to them, watching Stephanie cover Jason's nails with black nail polish with an odd look on his face. He thought it was the smell that bothered him until Dick asked, 'You're putting on nail polish?'

'That's what it looks like.' he answered, twitching his fingers and glaring at Stephanie when she slapped his hand to keep him still.

Dick looked upon the nails with a conflicted expression. 'Guys can do makeup?'

Jason coughed, surprised by the question. After all, Dick had used to have light makeup applied on him by his parents for shows and he'd never had a problem with it but of course he didn't remember that now.

Yet another reminder of the court's work.

'Of course guys can put on makeup.' Barbara answered, saving Jason from answering. 'Anyone can do makeup.'

Dick cocked his head, watching in fascination as Stephanie finished painting Jason's middle finger and moved to his ring finger, gliding the brush in an effortlessly smooth manner and not letting any of the paint latch on to the skin. 'But I've never seen any men with makeup....'

Aah. Now who was going to explain to the child that he lived in probably the prissiest and judgemental city in America and that their high class status demanded gender norms to be enforced much more strictly then others? Jason shrugged one shoulder, biting in a yelp at another stinging slap delivered to his knuckles by Stephanie. He was going to trip her over and accidentally make her fall over some sharp rocks during patrol, mark his words-

'Some men don't like makeup, just like some girls dont. But anyone who does can put it on. Unfortunately, this city isn't really ready for that. Most people look down on men who wear makeup and consider it girly.' Stephanie explained easily as she finished painting Jason's pinky and the older watched in dismay as she grabbed the white nail polish and a very thin brush he knew was used for designs. 

'No bats.' he reminded sharply, only receiving an eye roll and an innocent smile in return. Dick frowned and reached out to touch the wet polish, only to have his wrist grabbed and gently put away by the blonde. 'It's still wet. Wait till it's dry and then you can look at his nails closely. And you.' she turned to Jason and waved the brush menacingly. 'You don't move or I'll draw hearts instead of what I've planned.'

'What _have_ you planned?'

'You'll see.' 

'I'm not doi-'

'Does Bruce mind?' Dick interrupted their bickering, eyes focused intently on the assortment of bottles, his voice betraying his vulnerability. Jason paused, confused.

'Mind what?'

'....makeup.'

Jason blinked, taken aback. Bruce was an asshole who couldn't mind his business in a lot of things. He minded when Jason swore or smoked or used a gun or-

-actually, Jason was pretty sure he minded his whole existence. Oh well.

But he was not sexist. He was one of the only high class people who didn't have opinions on _every single thing._

Gotta give the old man that.

Though he really wasn't comfortable talking about Bruce in such a good light. He might throw up. Or die. Both seemed plausible.

Thankfully, Barbara came to his rescue. 'No he doesn't. I would have kicked him in the head if he did.' she gestured to Jason who was squinting at his pinky which had a 'F' sprawled on it in white nail polish. 'Jason's putting nail polish on isn't he?'

Dick gave the redhead a _very_ unimpressed look. 'Jason does everything he can to make him mad.'

'Yup.' the older vigilante agreed, grinning at his little brother. 'Now you're getting the family dynamics, kiddo. That's just how it works. But to be fair, I don't have to try that hard to make him mad.'

'Yes, you just have a natural gift.' Barbara said sarcastically before smiling at the child again, reaching forward to squeeze his hand. 'Do you wanna try putting nail polish on?'

Stephanie's eyes lit up in excitement and she bounced up to sit straighter, grinning wildly. 'Yes please!! I can experiment with so many colours on you!'

Dick looked intrigued but hesitant before he finally asked, 'Sure Bruce won't mind?'

'Only one way to find out.' Japan said dismissively, standing up and hooking an arm around Dick's waist to pick him up, ignoring his surprised yelp as he dropped him in the chair he'd just vacated. He wiggled his fingers, secretly grinning at the bold **FUCK U** sprawled over the black nail polish in white.

Spoiler knew him well. He couldn't tell Steph that though, he'd never hear the end of it. He sat on the floor, resting his back against his bed as he watched the trio in front of him. Barbara had turned her wheelchair to peer over Dick's shoulders as Dick picked up different bottles and debated on what colours. Stephanie was not so subtly pushing forward the brighter colours that no one in the family let her use on them. When Dick looked over them, she piped up eagerly, 'You know bright pink is a very pretty colour.'

The ten year old raised a brow and nudged it away with his finger. 'No.'

'Okay, how about neon?'

'Nope.'

'Orange?'

'Hmm.....no.'

'Ugh. Yellow?'

'N-' Dick paused, narrowing his eyes as he glared at the tiny harmless bottle as if it was going to spring up and attack him. '....maybe.'

'Yay!' Stephanie cheered as she snatched the bottle up before Dick could change his mind. 'Put your hand down.'

'But I'm not sure-'

'Deciding time is over, now it's painting time.'

'What? That's not fair!'

'True. We can discuss how unfair it is while I paint your nails.'

Dick stared at her in astonishment and looked at Jason incredulously. 'Is she serious?'

'Don't look at me buddy, you chose your sides when you ratted me out to them.' 

Dick gave him a betrayed look before extending his hand out to be grabbed by Stephanie, letting his fingers be spread and biting his lip as he watched her unscrew the bottle. Before he could stop himself, he blurted out 'It doesn't hurt, does it?'

Jason paused, his lips twisting in anger. Barbara and Stephanie grimaced too before Stephanie immediately smoothened her face into a neutral expression and gently said, 'No honey, it won't hurt at all. It just has a really strong smell so that might sting a bit.'

Dick gave a relief nod, his cheeks reddening slightly from what Jason could assume was embarrassment at the pitying stares from the other. Jason swallowed the bitter taste in his mouth and looked away and Barbara followed suit, pressing the buttons on her wheelchair to approach Jason instead of hovering behind the duo. Jason leant his head back against the mattress and resting his painted nails on a raised knee to look up at her, striking up an easy conversation as Stephanie busied herself with painting Dick's nails, having to take small swipes as Dick's nails were smaller then she was used to. In the last year or so, Barbara was the easiest person to have a conversation with after Tim (surprisingly).

A second later, Stephanie held Dick's painted nails up to her mouth and blew on them to help them dry faster, grinning at Dick's giggles.

'You look like a fish.'

'Watch it kid, I have an assorment of potential weapons to use on you here on this table.'

'....nail polishes?'

'Yup. One jab of this brush in your eye, you'll be sobbing in pain.' she smiled viciously, tightening her hold on his wrist when he tried to pull his hand away. 'Now stay still, I'm waiting for your nails to dry so that I can finish up.'

'What's left?'

'You'll see.' 

'Um....Jason?'

He turned away from Barbara to smirk at the kid. 'You're on your own.' 

'Oh relax, will you? I'm not going to cut your fingers off.' Steph rolled her eyes and let his hand drop as she unscrewed the cap of the black nail polish and opened a box and pulled out tiny cut up sheets with little hats on it. She plastered it over his dried nails before picking the brush and painting black nail polish over it. Dick made a surprised sound as she painted over his thumb. He waited till she was done with all five of his fingers before reaching for the sticky tab still sticking out so he could pull it off but stephanie nudged it away.

'Wait for it to dry. It'll mess the little bats up otherwise.'

'Oh....Kay.' he tapped his fingers impatiently and his cheeks puffed out adorably as he blew on his nails, missing Stephanie's dramatic coo, startling when she reached forward to pinch his cheek. He pulled as face at her, his nose, cheeks and mouth squished thanks to her grip on him. 'Umph. Le'go.'

'But you're so cute!'

He glared at her and Jason grinned as he turned his head and snapped his teeth near her hand, smiling victoriously when she immediately drew her hand away. 'And vicious.' 

'My weapon.' 

'Spunky.' she hummed as she picked up a tweezer and gripped the sticky tab of the bat sheet, pulling it off one by one to reveal two bat symbols painted on each nail. Dick held his hand up to his face to examine it, smiling at his hand. 'Thanks Stephanie.'

'You like it?'

'Yeah.' he answered truthfully, eyed trained on his thumb. 'Cool.'

'At least someone in this family appreciates my dedication and talent.' Stephanie sniffed, sending a half hearted glare at the other two who calmly stared back. 'Now, come on kid. We have work to do.'

'What work?'

'We have to combine our efforts of you being effortlessly adorable-'

'-hey-'

'-and my persistently annoying nagging to convince my stubborn annoyance of a boyfriend to let me paint his nails.'

Dick shrugged and followed after Stephanie out the door but froze when Bruce passed by and paused at the duo. He raised a suspicious brow and looked them up and down. 'What are you two up to?'

'Absolutely nothing.' Stephanie answers immediately, not noticing as Dick stepped behind her slightly, looking nervous. Jason watched him from the room, knowing what was going on in the kid's mind. He tightened his shoulders as he watched the interaction, ready to step in if necessary though he knew deep down that there would be no need.

Bruce may be an emotionally constipated asshole but he wasn't a bitch. At least not in that perspective. 

Bruce continued to stare at Stephanie suspiciously though Jason couldn't blame him. Stephanie's innocent act was almost always a masquerade for something mischievous. She'd caused more broken vases then any of the boys and they actually _live_ here.

Stephanie rolled her eyes and held her hand up to his face. 'I was just making your kids hands pretty by painting their nails. Nothing sinister big guy, take a breath.'

Bruce raised a brow, though he already looked a bit distracted, seemingly relaxed now that he no longer feared his house being blown apart. He rubbed the bandage that was wound around his chest. 'That's it?'

'Jesus, yes. The only new thing I did was paint Dick's nails.' she said and nudged the kid hiding behind her, who hesitantly held his painted hand out for Bruce to see, his body tense in a way that Jason had known to associate with fear.

Bruce, however, in all his glory of the distracted father of a hundred children who had too much on his plate, glanced at it distractedly and patted Dick's head as he walked away. 'It looks nice, kiddo.'

Dick watched him go but instead of looking discouraged or upset, he was grinning widely. Jason sighed and shared a pleased look with Barbara as Dick hopped after Stephanie down the hallway. Bruce's calm reaction and barely paying attention to the fact his ten year old son having his nails painted was...nice. It was as if he was reacting to something common, nothing out of the blue. 

As he should. As everyone should 

'He's doing much better then last time.' Barbara commented quietly as Dick's giggles bounced off the walls, mingling pleasently with Stephanie's chatter.

Jason nodded, letting a small smile pull at his lips, 'Yeah, he is.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My man may be traumatised and in desperate need for of therapy but he ain't no backward minded sexist asshole, and that's that.
> 
> Also I love seeing men wearing nail polish. I don't even know why, it's just so hot. And eye liner. 
> 
> Now imagine Jason with eyeliner.
> 
> You're welcome :-)
> 
> Anyway thanks for reading. Quick update because I'm looking forward to ending this story and also because I have a SAT in a bit over twenty days so I don't know when I'll update next :-(
> 
> On the other hand, I need some requests for the next chapter. Like this chapter, it's going to be more focused on other people's evaluation of Dick rather then Dick himself. You can request it with any of the siblings, Bruce is gonna be a little occupied.


	10. Paper balls and puzzles

The tip of the pen pressed against the paper and Dick sighed in annoyance as it tore it through. He ripped the page off the notebook and curled it into a ball, letting it drop on the floor next to him. Picking up the pen again, he went back to aimlessly skittering it over the page, aimlessly continuing to draw circles after circles without lifting the pen, keeping an ear out for any of his family. He knew they didn't like it when he disappeared on them but he needed space. He needed to feel safe without them.

The attic had become a favourable place of refuge for him. The added height and the stuffiness that came from the hundreds of boxes and dusty old toys was soothing to him. Height meant safety and being difficult to spot. Boxes and dusty old toys filled with remnants of many of his family members past meant that it was a reminder that he was safe. That he wasn't locked in some dingy cell back in the court, but rather choosing to hide away in his home, surrounded by artefacts that had been loved and woven by the people he loved.

The aimless drawings was just another way to ground himself. Jason had taught him that it didn't have to be pretty or perfectly drawn. Just anything that could calm his nerves and stop his hands from shaking and silence his mind.

He took in a shaky breath as he imagined his oldest brother here with him, rubbing tiny shapes on his back as he tried to help him regulate his breathing. 

_Two breaths in, one out,_ he would say as he wiped his tears, _That's it kiddo. Feel the carpet below you? You're in the living room. You're safe. Tell me five things you can see, come on pup-_

A stairway creaked and Dick's head shot up, snarling angrily as the floor door to the attic was opened and Damian's head popped up as he climbed up the attic stairs. 'Richard.' he greeted as he climbed into the attic fully. The two brothers stared at each other for a while until Dick picked up one of the discarded paper balls and threw it at him petulantly. Damian caught it easily and climbed up the stairs so that he was fully in the attic. 'Richard, stop that.' 

Dick glared at him before picking up another ball and throwing it at his older brother, hitting him on the chest when the other didn't move to grab it now. Damian sighed, sitting cross legged in front of the opening he'd come from and staring at the youngest Wayne passively. 'Why don't you tell me why you're upset? It would help you more then tossing measly paper balls at me.'

Another paper ball. He thought the message was pretty clear. _Leave me alone._

Damian caught this one and dropped it on his lap. 'I shall not leave, Richard. No matter how many of these you throw at me.'

In retaliation, Dick threw three at him this time, feeling an odd type of vindication when one hit his nose.

'Did you have a nightmare?'

No. He hadn't. He had learnt to handle those and he usually sought his family out himself when he did. But he didn't know how to explain without _talking_ that he'd had a panic attack and was embarrassed. Panic attacks were scarier. They made him feel even less in control of himself then usual and the fact that he'd had a full blown attack from something as measly as seeing Tim being injected was pathetic. That shouldn't remind him of the court. Not anymore. He knew his brothers said that recovery had many twist and turns and that he'd fall back into old old ways many times but this was just annoying. He hated succumbing to his trauma. He hated that he would be laughing and joking around one day and then screaming and crying another. He hated that he couldn't form any words right now, no matter how much he wanted to.

He hadn't been mute for a long time. A long long long time. He liked talking. He liked laughing. He liked being in bright places, not dusty attics. Yet here he was.

He ripped a page from his notebook and didn't even curl it into a ball before throwing it at his brother. Damian grunted in annoyance as he batted it away. 'Would you....like a hug? Todd says that it tends to make you feel safe.'

This time, he shook his head before throwing the paper to show his distate for the idea. He didn't want to be touched. He didn't. He wanted to be left alone. Maybe.

It seemed that Damian seemed to have finally gotten the hint because he gave a defeated sigh and turned around to begin descending the stairs, not noticing Dick's eyes widening in fear.

Okay, maybe he didn't want to be left _completely_ alone. He scrambled for a way to communicate that with his brother without actually talking but he came up blank. If he threw another paper, Damian might think he was just getting in one last shot before he disappeared. If he called his name- he thinks he can summon the energy to do that at least- he might stay but he would probably expect an explanation but he didn't have the energy for that. He could-

Damian had almost completely disappeared when Dick finally burst into tears, loud confusing tears which dripped down his cheeks and dropped off his chin on to the open notebook still in his lap.

The spiky black hair that had been slowly descending from the attic paused before a face appeared as Damian peeked over the floorboards, eyes widening at the tears. He scrambled back up, pulling himself into the attic and watching the crying ten year old warily. 'Richard?'

Dick bit his lip as he pushed his notebook away, slouching against one of the dirty boxes as he tried to stiffle his tears. He felt exhausted, but not enough to go to sleep. He wanted to be alone but not completely alone. He wanted someone there but not verbally communicate with them. He wanted to do something to take his mind off the embarrassment and stress the attack had bought but he was too exhausted to do something strenuous or something that needed too much of his focus but he also needed something that was difficult enough to grasp some of his attention.

He didn't know what to do. Art therapy was suppose to be just that, something light enough that he won't feel too stressed but profound enough that his mind was somewhat busy. But it wasn't doing its job today. It was boring him and allowing his mind to wander too far.

He needed a new activity. Something that ticked all the boxes. And he wanted Damian to stay close by but he couldn't exactly expect his brother to just lazily sit around in a dusty attic till Dick felt better. 

'Would you like me to keep you company?' Damian asked suddenly and Dick sighed in relief. He nodded as he finally managed to wipe his face clean and watched as his brother settled somewhat uncomfortably against the hoard of boxes, tucking his elbows into his lap so as not to touch any of the dirt. Dick felt slightly guilty, knowing his brother definitely had better things to do then sit in a crusty old attic. Plus, he knew Damian was slightly claustrophobic even if he didn't like to admit it. 

He didn't want to leave the peace of the attic. But maybe they could move to somewhere better. Somewhere dingy and quiet and secluded in the manor. 

'Do you recall this?' Damian asked suddenly and Dick glanced over at him to see him holding large dusty box. He rattled the box, causing the objects within it to tumble around loudly. Dick pushed the notebook off his lap and moved to his knees, peeking over the cover as Damian blew the dust away. From his distance, he saw a picture of a skyline divided in 500 puzzle pieces. 'We never finished it....'

He used to like puzzles? Who would have known. He shook his head distractedly, reaching ahead to trace the picture with his finger. Might as well try.

An emotion that Dick couldn't quite place flickered over his face but in a blink of an eye, it was gone. Instead, Damian gave him one of his rare smiles and jangled the box again. 'Well, would you like to try it now? I assume it would entertain you more then those aimless doodles there.'

He shrugged in response, already closing the notebook and pen and placed it on one of the dusty boxes.

'But I do not think we can lay it out here. This room is too clustered.' he wrinkled his nose at the dust that seemed to crawl in the air and gingerly picked up a discarded rag and wiped the box. Dick's shoulders sagged and Damian quickly said, 'We can find something else? I am sure Father and Pennyworth stored some of Todd's and Drake's abundance of toys in here-' He paused at Dick's insistent shake of the head. 'No? You want to do the puzzle?'

A nod. 'But we can't play here. Are you comfortable with leaving?'

Dick pondered over that. The pounding and buzzing in his head had calmed down since Damian had appeared. Maybe he needed company more then some mundane activity. He gingerly nodded, trying to quell the unexpected anxiety that surged in him.

It was okay. He was home. Not at the court. Not with his tormentors and his masters. He was with his family. His family who loved him and would never hurt him.

'Alright. Do you wish to venture to one of our rooms?'

No. That was not what he wanted. Not at all. He shook his head firmly, and shook it again when Damian suggested, 'Father's room?'

It went like this for a while, with Damian listing the many rooms of the manor and Dick refusing all the options. No place brought comfort to him.

'Pup, we are running out of options now.... All that's left is the pantry and the cave-'

Dick perked up and Damian narrowed his eyes.'....the cave?'

An enthusiastic nod. The cave was perfect. It was secluded and dark in a way that was comforting to him right now, in a way that was familiar enough to the court but different and warm enough that it reminded him of his family. As horrible as it was, Dick knew himself best as a Talon. Ignoring the pain and trauma they inflicted on him, their memory wiping and brainwashing had been effective enough that he really only knew one version of himself and while he liked the version that he was with his family, sometimes it tilted more towards pretending rather then actually being. Sometimes, he found himself acting a certain way to appease his family members, despite knowing there would be no unnecessary consequences for not doing as they say. And while he definitely liked himself a lot better as Dick Grayson, the youngest Wayne, it didn't erase Talon, a slave to the court of owls. It was why he had taken refuge in the attic instead of his own room. It was barren and lifeless and high enough that it could remind him of his times he'd spent perched on high places in the court (where no one had been able to touch him or see him or even hear him) but it was familiar. The cave wouldn't be that different. He hadn't been down there since he'd been rescued but he had no doubt that another one of his sibling would probably be down there too.

Was he actually allowed to go in the cave though? Bruce had never really said he could but _technically_ he hadn't said he couldn't either.

'Alright, let's go.' Damian announced purposefully, standing up and pushing the attic door open again, making the stairs flop down. He stood to the side and waited until Dick had dusted himself and walked out before he followed. Placing a warm hand on the boy's shoulder, (wow, he hadn't even realised he was cold) he gently urged him down the winding hallways to the grandfather clock in the back room, turning the hands of the clock to two and five to reveal the stone stairs leading to the cave. The darkness of it stunted him a little and he reached back to grab his older brother's hand, which spasmed for a second before relaxing. Damian took charge again and led him down the stairs

He could hear the sound of feet pattering and grunts and as they turned the corner, Jason and Tim came into view, their bodies twisting and turning around each other as they threw well practiced kicks and punches at each other. Cassandra sat on the Batchair, her knees pulled to her chest as she worked on a crossword puzzle, glancing up every now and then to watch her brothers spar. All three of them paused in their activities though as Damian and Dick stepped in to the room. Tim straightened from his crouched position, wiping the sweat beads gathering on his forehead with the back of his hand as he stared at the duo in bewilderment.

'Dick? What are you doing here?'

He shrugged, gripping Damian's hand tighter and stepping closer to him and pointing at the puzzle box clutched in the elder's hands. Damian saved him from having to talk though and raised his chin importantly. 'We decided to spend our time solving this puzzle piece we found in the attic.'

'Uh....here?'

'I would assume so Drake as I am currently standing here.'

'Don't be a bitch, I was ju- ouch!' a smack resonated around the cave as Jason thwacked him on the head with a staff he had pulled up. 'Jason! What the fuck! We were on a break!'

'I didn't hear the refree say we could take a break. All I saw was you being distracted.' he shrugged and to Dick's amusement, he swept the shaft on the floor, knocking Tim off his feet. 'You snooze, you loose- umph!' the staff was dropped as Jason hopped away, holding his knee that Tim had just kicked. 'Fucker.'

'Bitch boy.'

Dick saw Cassandra roll her eyes as Jason pounced on Tim, their advanced fighting methods all but forgotten as they kicked and slapped at each other. Next to him, Damian tutted as he led Dick away from the 'blubbering apes' to a more secluded corner of the cave, far away that they could have some form of privacy but close enough that he could still hear his siblings fooling around. 'I do not know how Father can trust those two imbeciles to assist him in our mission.' he sniffed, somewhat haughtily as he sat cross legged and opened up the box to toss all the puzzle pieces on the floor. As they began to straighten the pieces to the colourful side, a loud yelp and the sound of multiple equipments clattering to the floor could be heard, followed by an indignant, 'Tim!'

'You pushed me!'

'I did not!'

'Yes you did! Cass, he pushed me right?'

'I wasn't watching.'

'Why the hell not, you're suppose to be our spotter-ow! You pinched me!'

'Did not.'

'What the fu-'

Damian sighed irritably, narrowing his eyes in the direction his siblings voices were coming from. His fingers and shoulders twitched as if to spring up into action. Dick watched him in amusement before reaching forward to nudge him. When his brother finally met his eye, he jerked his head where the voices were coming from.

'You want me to leave?'

Not really, but clearly Damian wanted to join his siblings. He didn't mind doing the puzzle alone, it didn't seem that difficult of a task. He shrugged his shoulders and nodded, trying to get his thoughts through without actually talking.

'I don't mind staying with you Richard. You're much more tolerable then those idiots.' he answered truthfully and Dick smiled at him. Jason was right, Damian definitely had a soft spot for him. He'd never say something like that to any of their other siblings. But he knew Damian would much rather spar and train with the others then sit quietly and solve puzzles. He didn't mind it though. As long as he was near his siblings, he was okay. Plus, it would probably be more simulating if he was to solve the puzzle alone without any help.

Damian didn't move though, continuing to watch him inquiringly until he finally made his decision and stood up, dusting imaginary dust from his knees. 'You can come get us anytime you want, alright?' With a pat on his head, he stalked towards the direction from where the angry yells had now turned to distant muffled voices. A second later, he heard Damian let out a loud war cry followed by even more yells. Rolling his eyes at his siblings shenanigans, he turned back to the puzzle and began to shift the pieces that seemed would go in one piece, joining a few here and there as they started to form a disjoint picture.

The time slipped by slowly as his mind grew preoccupied with the puzzle and the fights and banter his siblings were getting into in the background. The anxieties and the insistent buzzing had died down as the time passed, and his body slowly relaxed as he calmed down. The picture in front of him was slowly forming to a pretty image of a skyline and his head was quiet and he felt....almost serene. He could almost pretend the morning hadn't happened-

A hand touched the back of his head and he jumped violently, accidentally sending three puzzle pieces flying to the other side of the cave. He looked over his shoulder and tensed, surprised he hadn't heard them approach but relaxed when he saw it was just Bruce. The man smiled at him gently, dressed in the bat suit rather then his usual sweaters or button ups. He glanced around in surprise, wondering if it was late enough for his father to be on route for his parole but the cave had no windows or clocks, so he couldn't tell how much time had passed. He did notice now that the cave was silent and was no longer filled with his siblings yells and laughs. He looked back at his father and held his arm up to his chest, tapping a finger on his wrist where a watch would typically be strapped on.

'Time?' the elder asked, crouching down to sit next to the boy and giving his hair another gentle ruffle. 'It's a bit past seven.'

He nodded, dropping the puzzle piece he'd been holding to climb into his father's lap, his bottom cold from the cave floor. Bruce settled more comfortably on the floor, wrapping a muscled arm around his stomach and raising a brow at the boy's slightly off behaviour. But he didn't prod further so Dick could probably assume that he'd been informed of the breakdown that occured in the afternoon. 

On the down side, he didn't like his father knowing about his weak moments. But on the bright side, one less person to communicate with non verbally and explain his off behaviour.

He tapped the bat on Bruce's chest and nodded in the direction the batmobile was parked in, asking if he was about to leave soon. It was truly a miracle that the man understood him with so little to go on.

'Not yet. I'll leave after you go to bed. Now.' he reached forward and plucked a corner piece up and held it to eye level. 'Since when are you interested in puzzles?'

He shrugged and swiped the piece away, placing it back where it had been. He'd been mapping the entire thing out for a while and had been determined to finish it but now, he was more content with just sticking close to his father's side. 

'Don't you want to finish?'

He shrugged again and turned into his father's hold, his wings raised so that he could still be held. 'Well if you're done, I'd like you to eat something. Alfred said you ate very little-' his words were cut off with a loud clang and raised voices came again. Bruce sighed in frustration, dragging a hand down his face. 'Oh for the love of god- boys! Enough! Those gadgets aren't exactly cheap!' 

When the yells didn't stop, he sighed in an aggravated manner and stood up, bringing Dick along with him and holding him securely in his arms as he walked over to the noise, his voice reverting off the cave walls and mixing with the others as he yelled over his sons and despite the shouts, he felt comfortable. It was an odd moment to feel relaxed in, seeing as his father was currently yelling at his two older brothers to quit acting like unruly children and his brothers were in turn yelling back about each other's faults, it didn't scare him. From the side of his eye, he could see Jason watching them with an amused smirk as he tapped away on his phone and Cassandra smiling as she leant against his arm. If he listened hard enough, he could hear Alfred's polished shoes tapping on the cave floor as he dusted the dinosaur.

This was good. This was how it was suppose to be. Surrounded by his family, at his best and worst moments. He remembered the time they'd used to tiptoe around him, hiding their anger and sadness in front of him and only showing him their good side. He had appreciated it but he'd also known that he wouldn't feel truly as a part of the family if he only saw one side of them. The good and the ugly.

He tucked his face securely in to Bruce's shoulder as his father continued scolding Tim and Damian, managing to subdue their arguments.

He was safe. He felt safe with them. He's still on his way to feeling safe _without_ them. For now, this was okay. He'd get there eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a filled chapter, I don't even know where it came from. It's just a load of garbage and it's kinda all over the place but the ideas cute.
> 
> Next chapter will actually help the story progress I promise.
> 
> Thanks for reading my garbage. Much appreciated my dudes


	11. What's to come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing to see here, just two bros having a convo about their families and being best friends and not enemies like DC so wants them to be.

'You know, it's wrong to spy on people.' Clark jokes as he stepped into the dining room, approaching his friend who was staring out the large windows where Tim was rolling up a large ball of snow for Dick. Bruce glanced over his shoulder at him and rolled his eyes, turning back to the window as Clark came to stand next to him.

'I'm not spying on them. They're my children.'

'If they don't know you're watching their every move, it's spying. Doesn't matter what your relation to them is.' Clark teased, nudging the second cup of tea he'd bought to Bruce, who accepted it with a nod. 'Why are you hovering over them? Worried about Dick?'

'No, not really. He's with his siblings and he's in clear sight. Not much to worry about.'

Clark paused, his mug still liftef to his mouth but he lowered it as he narrowed his eyes suspiciously. _'You're_ being logical and not letting your anxieties and suspicions take over your normal people's brain? Are you sure you're not sick?' he reached a hand out to press the back of his knuckle against Bruce's temple, pulling it away with a grin when it was slapped away. In front of him, Dick had dropped to his knees and was working with Tim to smoothen the large ball of snow he'd just collected. 

'Drink your tea.' Bruce ordered, turning back to the window to watch his children playing around in the snow. As he watched, Dick give a tiny shiver, pulling the large coat draped over him tighter, causing the bulge of his wings that were folded and hidden beneath to draw a clear outline on the fabric. As they watched, Cassandra reached out to stroked his back and smoothened the wings down, patting his head before turning back to her own snowman. 'Why tea though?'

'Why not tea?'

'Coffee is better.'

'I've watched you go four days without sleep and function purely on coffee before you crashed down the stairs from hallucinations and headaches.'

'It was a stressful time. And I didn't fall down the stairs.'

'Your right. You slid down it and fell into a heap at the bottom.'

'Hmph.' 

'Yeah that's what I thought. Drink your tea, I'm not taking any chances with you when Alfred's not here to keep you in line.'

'I'm not 10.' The billionaire snapped but did as he was told so anyway, lifting the mug to his lips and gulping down the warm liquid. 'Do we have some left over? Dick will probably need some after he comes back.'

'Plenty. All of them can have a cup of it.' he took a sip to hide his snort as Cassandra leant forward to discreetly slid a handful of snow down Tim's jacket as his enhanced hearing allowed him to hear the loud _yeep_ he let out as he jumped around and flapped his jacket. 'Assuming Jason and Damian don't finish the pot.'

'They're in the kitchen? Together? I don't hear yelling.'

'Well Jason was. Damian went in when I was leaving. Maybe Jason jumped out the window.'

'It's plausible. Would explain why I don't hear war music.' Bruce hummed and spared a wary glance over his shoulder, as if worrying he'd see a pool of blood trailing into the room. 'Things have been too good lately.'

'So they're bound to go bad?'

'That's how it works.'

'You're just a bundle of holiday joy, aren't you? Quit being so morbid and just accept that your kids are getting along.' he joked, watching as Dick started on rolling up a smaller ball of snow for the upper part of the snowman. 'Though I am surprised that Dick's out playing in the snow. Isn't his kind against the cold? I thought you told me that when the first cold breeze came along, he freaked out and had multiple panic attacks.' 

Bruce sighed, closing his eyes at the memory. He remembered the panic and how he'd burst into tears, tearful and scared of the cold just as he had been in the court. It had been a challenge to get clothes that could fit over the child's wings because unfortunately, he got cold much more easier then the rest of them and he couldn't walk around shirtless anymore. But as the months had passed, the bitter cold winds had started accompanying snow and the more the temperature dropped, the more nervous he got. Damian and him had done their research and they'd learnt that Dick couldn't be frozen in a cognitive state unless he was locked in a small space and with the temperature dropped much lower ( due to incomplete transformation) something which didn't happen in Gotham. Dick still hadn't been completely okay though, jittery and anxious despite the entire manor's temperature being risen and the multiple fireplaces always being lit. 'He needs to get used to the cold. Jason and Tim have been bundling him up and urging him out to play in the snow every now and then.'

'He seems to be doing good.' Clark observed, staring at the faraway figures of Tim helping Dick pick up the rolled up snow and plop it into the bigger one. 'No signs of panic or anxiety.' He tilted his head to listen to the trio's heartbeat, recognising the weakest one as the Talon's, seeing as his normal heartbeat was much slower then an average human being's. He couldn't tell how the kid was feeling, not used to the slow heartbeat. 'Heart sounds as normal as it can? Does it ever speed up or slow down?'

'Sometimes. It's hard to tell, to be honest.'

'Well, it sounds normal right now. At least for him. That's good, right? Progress?'

'In a way. He's going to get twitchy and panicky when he comes inside though, always does. After a while, he'll stop having fun and will be preoccupied with how cold he feels and how his clothes are wet and sticking to him. It takes him longer to get warm after that, and he gets anxiousbtyay he just....won't warm up.'

'Then why make him go outside and play around? Wouldn't it be easier to just avoid the panic and fear altogether and let him hide away?'

'Easier, yes. Functional, no. Gotham spends five of it's months in Winter and Dick can't stay hidden away from it for almost half a year for the rest of his life. It's hard now but he'll benefit from it in the future.'

'That's...fair. Harsh but fair.' He was all too well equipped with lessons that might sting at first, but helped him evolve and grow in the long run. After all, training to be Superman and having some of the worst of mankind as his enemies hadn't exactly came easily to him. 'Speaking of the future....what's your plan?'

'For?'

'For him. What's in store for him in the future?'

'Well, after he finishes playing outside, he's going to take a warm bath and then a nap. Clearly, he's a very busy boy.'

'Funny. You know what I'm talking about, Bruce. He's getting better every day and with all these things you're doing, it seems as if you're preparing him to- you know, go out in the real world.'

'Hmm. His world needs to expand, he can't just stay cooped up in the house forever.' Bruce sighed, tilting his head back and downing the rest of the tea before turning on his feet and walking away. Behind his back, Tim had Cassandra locked in a headlock and was trying to pull her scarf off to presumably put on the snowman. Clark saw Jason approaching the trio and lifting Dick from behind who had been crouched over the path and collecting different sized pebbles before turning to follow his friend downstairs. 'He's getting better and I know he wants to start living a normal life again. I don't see any reason to prolong it.'

'Do the others agree with that?' 

'All of them except Damian. He doesn't think it's safe for him to leave the house and get away from our supervision.'

'He's not ready to let him go yet?'

'No. Not that I can blame him. I'm not that crazy over him leaving the house for hours upon a time with no one watching over him either.' 

'You want to keep him locked up in the house forever?'

'Honestly, yes. But-' he added quickly, glaring at Clark when he opened his mouth to tell him off, '-I know that's not right and it's selfish to want to keep him close because of my own fears. I'm not going to cut him off from the world but I don't have to be overly happy about him being out there either.'

'You think that's hard, wait till he goes off to college.' 

'Mm. Not happening for at least 9 years. Let's just wait for him to finish elementary school.' 

'You're going to enroll him in a proper school?'

'Re-enroll. Stone academy.'

'His old school? Won't that be hard for him?'

'I'll ask him if he wants to go there or try some where new.'

'What do his teachers think happened to him?'

'Same as the rest of Gotham. Kidnapped and recovering from the trauma.'

'They don't know the court had him?'

'Absolutely not. There'll be too much trouble in the future, they won't understand and I don't want to risk them taking him away and demanding him to be put with the other Talons.'

'In the centre? Or...the other one?'

'If the public was to fight me to have Dick taken away from me, I would fight them tooth and nail if they demanded he was to be put in arkham.'

'Did you ever consider it? Not putting him in Arkham but in the centre you formed for Talons that still had some....humanity left in them.'

'For about two minutes. In his third week back home when he attacked Alfred and later had a panic attack when the generator started up suddenly.' he sighed and let his head rest against the arm chair he'd come to rest on. 'It was shot down quickly though and for good reason. The centre is for people who have no family left and have no one who can look after them. Not for Dick.'

'Hmm. I think you guys helped him more then any of the physicians there. He's getting his light back and I'm guessing his bad days are growing sparse?'

'He still has them. They're more frequent then I'd like but I don't really think they'll ever just go away completely. They rarely do.'

'Balance of life I guess. Good days and bad days. Can't just have one.'

'You can't.' he agreed, hand twitching as if to reach for the mug but remembering it was empty. 'But I'd like him to have more good days then bad days.'

'I think you're limiting the chances of that if you're sending him to school. I've raised two kids who both fought with the worst of the worst and yet high school was what really traumatised them.'

Despite himself, Bruce snorted. 'Damian's not a big fan either. Even Dick didn't like it much before everything. But he needs to go to school if he wants to make friends and get a job and everything.' 

If you want him to make friends why don't you introduce him to some of the league's protege's his age? Especially Barry's nephew-'

'Absolutely not.' Bruce declined flatly, shaking his head as he kept a ear out for any of his boys returning, 'He doesn't need that.'

'....I thought you said you wanted him to make friends?'

'Yes. Normal friends. Friends that are not putting themselves constantly in danger and who won't encourage him to follow in their footsteps.'

'Because they'll be a bad influence on him?'

'Yes.'

'You do realise these kids are being trained and raised by members of the Justice league, right?'

'I don't want them getting into Dick's head and making him want to become one of them.'

'A hero?'

'Yes.'

'Bruce- you don't want Dick to follow in your footsteps? To follow in his siblings steps?'

'I didn't want any of my kids to become child heroes. And especially not after Jason. I wasn't even on board with Dick when he was training to be my protege and he doesn't remember any of his dedication to becoming Robin now. This is my chance to direct him away from it. I should have never given in to it in the first place.'

'I...does- does he even want to become Robin again? Has he said anything?'

'No, and he's not going to get the chance.'

'Bruce, you can't just make this decision for him.'

'Yes, I absolutely can. I'm his guardian. And the one that would potentially train him. I tell him no as his guardian and as his would be mentor, he can't be Robin.' He stood up and picked both his and Clark's mugs and walking towards the kitchen. Clark sighed in frustration and got to his feet to follow him. He'd always hated Bruce's habit of just getting up and leaving when he didn't like how a conversation was going. 'Why are you upset with my decision, anyway? You were against Robin to begin with.'

'Yeah, I was. I have also changed my mind after seeing how stubborn all your children are. I honestly don't think he'd be okay with this decision being made for him and I don't really think you can stop him...'

'I don't think so either. But it's not happening. He's been through enough pain in his life, he doesn't need the added horror from facing psychopaths and heartless thugs who wouldn't bat a single eye before hurting him.'

'If you won't train him, he'll find someone else. Or worse, he'll go out alone and without any protection which if I ha e to remind you, was what he threatened to do before. Bruce-'

'Clark, I want him to have a normal life. You don't understand how....how terrifying it was when he was gone. And when I finally found the court and broke in, I had no gurantee that he was even alive. I was prepared for him to be changed and broken, and he _was_ but I could handle that. I can't- I can't handle losing another kid. He barely survived, I'm not putting him in any unnecessary situation which could endanger him. I want him to have a normal and healthy life, have normal friends and a normal upbringing and a normal hobby. The only danger I want him to be involved in is catfishing and insurance fraud.'

'A normal li- Bruce, his whole family is full of vigilantes and if you look away from the hero side, he's the son of a billionaire. His life is going to be _far_ from normal.' 

'What's your point?'

'My point is-'

'-B?' Clark's mouth shut with an audible snap as a shivering ten year old stepped into the dining room, his wet coat sliding off his shaking arms as he pulled it off. Snow clung to his beanie and some of his hair that was peeking out as he rubbed his bare arms and shoulders. 'I'm cold.'

The tense atmosphere of the room flipped completely as both adults turned to the child, Bruce raising one arm to allow his son to burrow into his stomach. He wrapped a large hand around Dick's shoulders and wings, rubbing the skin to warm him up. 'Done playing in the snow?' 

He didn't answer, his wings trembling with theremainalsnof snow in his hair falling on to his shoulder. Instead, he lifted his arms up to be picked up and wrapped his arms and legs around his father when he did so. 'I'm really cold, dad.' 

'It's okay.' Bruce sighed, rubbing his back. 'A hot bath and tea will warm you up.' He squeezed the ten year old comfortingly before looking at Clark. 'Did you bring the...supplies I asked you to?'

Clark grimaced, having completely forgotten the actual reason he'd come over. 'Yes...they're in the cave. But Bruce, are you sure it's the right thing to do? Or the right time?'

Bruce watched him with an unreadable expression before he moved his hand to Dick's wings, gently running a palm over the feathers and then to the bone of the carpel edge. Getting the hint, Clark's eyes glowed red as he activated his x-ray vision and took in the inner state of Dick's wings. Like Bruce had said, the bones were brittle and the veins were clustered and thin. He grimaced as his eyes went back to their normal blue and scrubbed a hand over his face. 'It's all down there in the cave. And it's tested and it's safe. But it's going to hurt.'

'I-'

'What are you guys talking about?' Dick asked, pulling his face away from Bruce's neck to stare at them, causing both their words to get stuck in their throats. Behind him, his wing shook slightly, the warmth from Bruce's hand irritating the cold organ. Over his head, Bruce bit his lip as he silently ordered him to not say anything, to inform of the boy of what was in store for him.

_About your wings. About how the incomplete transformation means that your body doesn't have enough fluids and energy to accommodate your wings. That we went behind your back and interrogated your tormentors to find out how to prevent those damn things from killing you._

He swallowed thickly, the lie tasting bitter in his tongue as he quickly answered, 'League buisness, kiddo.'

'Oh...can you do it later? Because I'm really really cold.' he turned to his father and pulled at his sweater insistently, who smiled softly in retaliation. 'I'm freezing!'

'Alright, alright. I get it.' He glanced over his shoulder as he let Dick burrow back into his arms. 'Give me half an hour.'

'Clark!' a voice rung out through the kitchen as Tim stepped in. 'When did you get here?' 

Plastering a smile over his face, he turned to talk to the second eldest child as Bruce carried Dick out of the kitchen, his conversation with Bruce running in the back of his mind. He knew the rest of the family was in on the 'medical treatment' that was going to happen and none of them were crazy about it. But despite not wanting Dick to fall back on his progress (which was a given) they were still going to go forth with it. It had to happen. But he wasn't looking forward to his best friend and his family growing miserable again.

'Hey.' Tim called, breaking Clark from his thoughts. 'Are you okay?'

'I just....I bought the serums and solutions for Dick's treatment. And it's just.... it's kinda _heartbreaking_ to know what's in store for him. Are you not worried?'

'I...I am. I'm just trying not to think about how upset he'll be and focusing on how his health would improve.'

'Maybe put it off?' even as he said it, he knew it wasn't feasible. They'd tested Dick's tissue cells and blood and the longer they prevailed the treatment, the more danger they put him in. He knew that but he still didn't like it. Even now, his heart twisted with guilt as he picked up Dick's chatter and giggles from the bathroom and Bruce's calm replies. Focusing harder, he listened to his friend's heartbeat, noting how fast it was going. He was anxious. Just like everyone else in the house. 

'You know we can't.'

'Yes.' he sighed, walking over to the teapot and pouring Tim a hot cup of coffee. 'Well...I'm here to help. Whenever you decide to go through with it.' 

Tim discarded his wet clothes and hopped on to the counter, taking the extended cup with a grateful smile. 'I think the most you can do is bring him lots of maltese balls as a peace offering.'

'Sure. Um....what are Maltese balls?'

'....Never mind.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two updates? In a week? I'm feeling very generous despite having a SAT in 10 days.
> 
> Oh well.
> 
> I'm sorry for the small chapter though but if it makes you feel better the next two should be much longer


	12. Treatment (pt.1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIIIIG CHAPTER!! HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY THE ANGST!

Something was wrong with his family.

Dick didn't know what it was or why he thought something was wrong. He couldn't really pinpoint a valid reason or action that was making him suspicious. He just _knew_ that something was wrong.

It had started after new year's Eve, and the three weeks since then, he'd only grown more and more suspicious. Despite their encouragements at the start of winter to go outside and play, his hours spent outside had slowly grew sparse and limited. They'd almost jumped out of their skin when he'd started coughing randomly because his throat had tickled and he'd been bombarded with questions about his health and the possibility of various symptoms. He'd noticed that he was strategically being kept away from the cave again and the one time he'd went down there unannounced, Tim had seemed harried and anxious and had pulled a curtain around something too quickly for Dick to see. And these were just the big signs that had tipped him off that they were up to something.

Their behaviour had changed too, in a way he couldn't really explain. He wasn't sure if he was being paranoid or if it was actually happening but it felt as if they were _observing_ him. They were touchier, though they were more wary of his wings and he'd started noticing how they would sometimes abruptly stop talking when he walked into the room, looking like deers caught in headlights for all of two seconds before they smoothened their expression into a blank one. Sometimes, in the quiet of the house, he could pick up his name being whispered in faraway rooms between his siblings, in conversations that made no real sense to him.

He didn't know what was going on but he knew _something_ was wrong. And the secrecy was making his skin crawl to the point where he felt himself shying away from his family and seeking solitude rather than their company, something which hadn't happened in a while. But that didn't seem plausible, because everytime he turned around, his family was there, refusing to leave him alone or let him hide away. Alone time with so many siblings was rare but it hadn't been impossible but now it felt as if they were too scared to let him be alone for more then a few seconds. 

It felt as if they were waiting for something to happen to him. 

He'd tried to convince himself that he was just overthinking. They were still _normal-ish_ with him. Jason still picked him up and tossed him in the air before ruffling his hair affectionately. Bruce still tucked him in every night and made sure he ate on alternate days. Tim still came up with new movies and cartoons for them to watch together. Cassandra still bought in stray cats for him to play with. Damian still begrudgingly let him hug him every now and then. Alfred still sat with him and tutored him on various subjects that Bruce had insisted he'd learn. In a way, things still felt normal.

But they weren't. They really weren't. Because admist those moments, there would be times when they'd just sit back and look at him with expressions full of sadness and guilt. Those two emotions seemed to flair up at the randomest moments and Dick was sure they hadn't realised he noticed them. And maybe a few months ago he wouldn't have. But he'd gotten better at reading emotions, specifically of those he spent hours upon hours with. And guilt combined with their strange behavior could only mean one thing.

They were hiding something. But he had no clue what. His only hope was that it was something small or insignificant that they were making a big deal of. 

Wistful thinking really.

They'd been stranger today. He'd heard them last night, the angry shouts that had richoeted off the manor walls and had awoken him from his slumber. His hearing hadn't managed to depict where exactly they were but it had picked on their upset tones. The words had been too jumbled and muffled for him to understand and he'd been too sleepy to concentrate harder. Instead he'd fallen asleep and had awoken to a tense atmosphere and the absence of Bruce and Tim. Cassandra had quietly told him that they were down in the cave, working on something major and they weren't to be disturbed so Dick had stuck with Damian for the morning, curling up against his brother's side as he played on Jason's Gameboy and tried to ignore the weird energy surrounding them. Jason was sprawled on one of the arm chairs in the study, and had already worked through half of his cigarettes carton, his eyes trained on him though he looked away whenever Dick looked up. 

If he needed any more proof that something was off about his family, it was this right here. Jason, openly smoking in the company of his siblings and Alfred and not receiving so much as a half hearted glare. Even Damian didn't say anything to him today, his eyes trained on the book he was gripping. 

Maybe it was from the fight last night? He hadn't really heard Jason but he could recall Damian yelling. Maybe his third brother was still upset with his family and they were walking on eggshells so as not to upset him? Wouldn't exactly be the first time, Damian did have a fiery temper.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by the bright _ping_ that came from Jason's phone and he looked up in surprise. Jason barely ever kept his ringer open. To his surprise, Jason seemed to have paled slightly as he stared at his screen and Dick startled when his head snapped up to meet Dick's eye. A smile crept over his lip as Jason pocketed the broken device and cleared his throat, standing up. 'Kiddo, come here.'

Next to him, Damian tensed. Dick sat up a little straight and looked between them suspiciously even as he slowly rose to his feet. Before he could take a step forward though, Damian suddenly shot up and straightened his shoulder, glaring angrily at their oldest brother. He opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by a tired Jason. 'I'm not doing this again with you, Damian. So either shut up or leave. Don't make this harder then it already is.' 

When Damian didn't seem out off by the concealed plea, Jason's eyes grew sharper and his eyes darted momentarily to Dick before returning to Damian and added, 'For any one of us.'

The younger gritted his teeth and looked between Jason and Dick, before promptly turning on his feet and stomping out of the study. Dick stared after him in surprise, turning back to Jason as the man let out a long suffering sigh and a gentle, 'Come on, kiddo. We need to go.' 

'Go where?' he asked even as he stepped into Jason's extended arm and let it curl around his shoulders, pinning his wings to his back. 'Why is Damian angry?'

'Damian's always angry.' Jason answered shortly, leading the child out of the study and down the large stairs. At Dick's expecting stare, he paused and added, 'It's...complicated. He'll be okay though. No need to worry.' He gave him another smile but this too, didn't reach his eyes. 

They walked into the living room and Dick paused when he realised Jason was taking him to the cave. 'Cass said they shouldn't be disturbed...'

His brother spared him a glance as he swung the hands to position, 'They're expecting us, don't worry.'

'Us? Both of us?'

'Mmm.' his hand tightened on his shoulder and Dick gave him a puzzled look as the clock shifted from its place to reveal the passage. Jason led him down the staircase, and Dick was taken aback by the quietness that greeted him. Even the bats seemed to be quiet today.

He wasn't used to any parts of the house being _this_ silent.

It made him nervous and his steps faltered and to his surprise, Jason's grip on his shoulder tightened, as if he was worried that he'd bolt. He loosened it hastily when Dick looked up at him in surprise and avoided his eye as he continued down the stairs. 

If Dick wasn't alarmed before, he definitely was now when he saw that the cave was not, in fact, empty. Tim and Bruce were just sitting there, a table behind that was covered by a white cloth. Tim avoided his eye and he spotted Cassandra on the side, lounging in front one of the exits. Jason's hand slipped from his shoulder after nudging him forward and Dick found himself missing the warm contact. Bruce was the only one who actually met his eye, his gaze hard and stern, though it softened as he took in how nervous the ten year old was.

'B? What's going on?'

'Come here, chum.' he called, holding his hand out which the child hesitantly took. The man dragged him towards him, so that Dick was standing between his legs and he dropped his hand to squeeze his arms reassuringly. He has the same smile as Jason. It was starting to creep him out. 'I- we have to talk.'

Dick nodded and waited for Bruce to continue but nothing came. 

'.....okay?' 

Bruce opened and closed his mouth several times, his hold on Dick never loosening. It was rare to see his family like this. Usually, Bruce was blunt and straight to the point but there were rare times he floundered. That was usually when he had bad news and he didn't know how to get it across without upsetting the other too much.

'Bruce....?'

'I don't want you to panic-'

'-panic-?'

'-ssh, let me finish. I- we had- okay. Dick, your wings are not....okay.' somewhere behind him, he heard an annoyed guffaw but he was too focused on Bruce to check who it was. 'Your wings are in a bad state. Your incomplete transformation meant that your body doesn't have all the resources it needs to support your new parts.'

'I- how do you know that?'

'We...well, we tested you. Blood samples and x-rays.'

'X-rays? When did you get x-rays of my wings?' His heart began to speed up (though his fastest heartbeat would probably be the normal beat of a human) and his voice was raising in volume and he vaguely felt someone's hand rubbing his back. 

He didn't know why that struck the wrong chord. But it bothered him that he'd had tests and _x-rays_ done on him without his consent. He couldn't even remember it. 

It reminded him of a place he didn't like thinking about anymore.

Panic was slowly starting to settle in his stomach, he knew something had been wrong, he'd _known_ his family had been hiding something, they'd been performing tests on him without his consent -

'About three months ago. I- you were knocked out and we took X-rays because your wings were much more different then the few other fully turned talons. And we found inadequate tissues and muscles and narrow clustered veins. It's not enough to support your wings and it's eating away at your health. And we need to take action as quickly as we can.'

'Ac-action? What type of action? Like.... exercises?' even as he said it, he knew it wasn't what they meant. His eyes darted to the covered table and then to where his siblings had dispersed around the cave. It was only now that he realised that they were covering the exits. All the exits.

The realisation that they were probably situated like that just in case he tried to make a run for it was not a pleasant one.

Suddenly he was finding it very hard to breath and Bruce's hold on him went from warm to caging. He pulled his arms away and stepped away from his father but he barely got three steps away before his arm was grabbed by Tim. Bruce's eyes followed him sadly before he forced himself to continue. 'No....no, more like....medicine. Kiddo, we need to do this.'

'What type of medicines?'

'Serums. And solutions. You need them injected thrice a day so that they can take effect in a month-'

_Injection? Needles?_

He didn't like needles. For a lot of reasons, he really didn't like needles. Needles meant pain and cruel eyes and restraints and more pain-

He yanked his arm away from Tim and stomped over to the table and pulled the cloth off to reveal multiple needles containing white and red serum. He stepped away and let the cloth fall to the ground, his face paling as images flashed before his eyes, memories of pain and being strapped to the chair, to seeing stranger's lean over him and the large needles with the very same red serum that was lying in front of him.

They'd promised that they would keep him safe. The court had been put behind him, his family had _promised_ him but yet here they were-

They were going to hurt him. 'You're- you- the court-'

'No, no, Dick it's not the same serum the court used. That had multiple purposes but this one is just for your wings-'

'So what?' From the corner of his eyes, he saw Jason cringe at his shrill tone but he was too upset to care to lower his voice. 'Don't you get how it's multifunctional? It's not going to just affect my wings, it will affect all of me! It will affect my heart! Don't you get it? It'll stop it and then-' he struggled with his words, not really wanting to word the fear that was eating him alive from imside. 'You're trying to turn me into a full blown Talon! The serum-'

'It won't! Kiddo, we'd never let that happen. I swear it won't. It's just going to help your wings function better, make them stronger so that they can actually support you-'

'No! No, I don't want to be like them! I'm not a Talon! I'm not! I don't want to be like them! I don't want any enhances that will make more like them-'

'Dick, If we don't do something now, it'll kill you!' Tim interrupted the boy's yelling, stepping in for Bruce. 'I'm sorry, I know this is scary but we have to do this, we _have_ to...' he spoke gently, his tone almost pleading for Dick to understand.

Screw that. Screw that.

'I don't want to be like them. I don't want to have any changes done to me that makes me less human and more- more of a _monster._ If you have to do something to them, just cut them off!'

'No, we can't do that. It's too risky.'

'And this isn't?!?'

'We've tested it, it's safe. It's not going to hur- it's not going to transform you. It'll just reduce all health risks involved with your current state.' Jason sighed, stiffening when Dick edged towards where he was standing guard.

'Who did you test it on?'

'That... doesn't really matter kiddo. But I promise you that it's safe. There will be side effects and you...you will feel sick but nothing more then that.'

Dick's face paled as another realisation crossed his mind. This had all been planned. It was too well thought out and they were too well prepared for all his questions. 'How long have you guys been planning this?' 

He recieved no answers. Instead, all his family did was share guilty looks with each other. To his horror, tears pooled his eyes and he flinched away when Cassandra reached for him from where he had backed away. 'Dick-'

'Just tell me. Please.'

He didn't think he'd get an answer until Tim guiltily admitted, 'Two months.'

He didn't know how to digest that. He'd known something had been off. He should have acted. He shouldn't have gotten so trusting-

'Chum...' Bruce began, rising from his chair to presumably approach him but stopped when Dick stepped back with a tearful glare. 'I swear we wouldn't even have considered this if it wasn't absolutely vital. We wouldn't do anything to purposely hurt you. Ever.'

'I- no, I don't want to do this. Please, I don't-' 

'Hey, hey...' Cassandra cooed softly, moving forward to envelop him into a hug. 'It's okay. You're safe.' 

'No- no it's just like the court and you're going to experiment on me and-' 

'Dad.' Cassandra called pointedly as she gently stroked Dick's hair and wiped his face. Her call seemed to snap Bruce out of his frozen shock and he strode over to the duo, crouching down and craddling his son's wet cheek. Dick stared back at him, his blue eyes piercing. 'I don't want to do this. I don't want to go down that hole again.'

'I know this is hard for you. Believe me, I don't want this anymore than you. But I do want you to be healthy and safe. I promise you, we'll be here for you. No matter what, I promise it won't be the same as the court.' he silently cursed himself when Dick flinched at the last sentence. Probably shouldn't have bought it up, he thought grimly, as he reached up to wipe his tears. 'It'll be okay, kiddo. We'll monitor any changes that arise and if there's even a hint of a problem, we'll stop.' 

Dick looked away from his earnest face and at his siblings, all of whom had gathered around the table and was watching him with a mixture of sadness and hope. He thought about how they'd planned this, how they were still being so secretive and the paranoid side of him told him to refuse, to fight and escape. But then, Bruce thumbed at a tear that had slipped down his cheek and his touch was so soft and gentle and-

-and nothing like the court. His family was nothing like the court. They had spent months protecting him and caring for him and loving him and-'

-he believed them. He had to believe that they wouldn't suggest this or enforce it if it wasn't necessary, because then, he'd have to accept that his family was just as manipulative and problematic as the court and he just...he just couldn't accept that. He bit down on his lip and lifted his hand to scrub at his cheek. 'Okay...'

A collective sigh of relief rung through the cave and Tim and Cassandra began to clean up as Jason picked up two syringes. Dick's eyes widened and he clung to Bruce's sweater, fighting the urge to break free and run away. 'Now?!?'

Bruce grimaced at him as he stood up to his full length, drawing Dick up with him and resting him on his hip. 'I know it's out of the blue. But the sooner we start the better.' he tried setting the boy down on the table but Dick clung to him tightly. Bruce paused before changing tactics, sitting down on the table instead, and placing his boy on his knee. 'I've got you.' he soothed, brushing his fingers through his hair, sharing a look with Tim who had pulled latex gloves on and was gently stroking Dick's wings to make them relax and open up from where he'd tucked them tightly against his back. 'Come on, Dickie. Let's get this over with.' His older brother urged, stepping away so Jason could take a hold of one of them and gently spread them to their full length. Bruce's arm tightened around him when he registered Dick's nervous shaking. Cassandra hopped up to sit on the table and squeezed his shoulder. 'We got you chocolate milkshake.' she said as a way of distraction, rightening her hold when Dick gasped as the first needle was pushed into his wing. 'You can have it later.'

Dick threw her a dirty look, a clear way of saying that it wasn't enough before it slipped away into a pained whine when Tim injected the next needle. As a reflex, he pulled his wings tightly against his back, hiding his face in his father's shoulder and ignored as all four of them attempts to coax him into straightening his wings for the last two shots.

He hated this. He hated this so much. He knew they hadn't told him everything, but he wasn't dumb. If these serums were going to alter his body to accommodate his wings, it was bound to hurt. 

Just like it had in the court.

_Not the court.... It's not the court-'_

The coaxes died away and he heard resigned sighs as his brothers forced his wings to open up and diligantly administrated the remaining shots. He whimpered and clung to his father tightly, trying to relax as he rubbed his back. He felt multiple hands squeezing his shoulders or ruffling his hair as a way to comfort him as they dispersed around the cave, no longer crowding him. Bruce didn't though. He stayed put and continued hugging his child, waiting for the side effects to take place that Dick didn't know about.

Dick was the first one to break the silence, 'I don't like this....'

He got a sigh and a quick kiss atop his forehead. 'Me neither kiddo. But-'

'-it has to be done.' Dick finished with a defeated sigh.

Bruce smiled at him sadly and gently tossled his hair. 'It'll be okay, kiddo.' 

'If you say so....'

~

Damian's eyes was fixed on the curled up figures in one of the see through med room, Dick's wings curled tightly against his back and his figure shaking a little. His arm twitched in Tim's hold, but he forced himself to stay still so that his brother could finish wrapping his bloody wrist up, knowing he wouldn't be allowed to stay with Dick in peace if he didn't receive proper medical attention.

A whimper cut through the tense silence in the cave and both of them froze as they glanced at the child. Damian's feet shuffled below him but he stayed in place when Tim gripped his arm tighter, sparing a glare at his older brother. 'Drake-'

'You know the rules, demon brat. You get medically checked and cleared before you can go ahead with your day.'

'He's upset.'

Tim paused and glanced at the child before swallowing and looking away. 'He's hungry.'

Made sense. His appetite had grown since the treatment, to the point where he almost had an average child's hunger. 

It didn't help that they now had to implement partial fast.

'How long till he can eat again?' 

'An hour and 54 minutes. Try to distract him till then.'

'Why can't you do that?'

'I've been with him all night while you guys were on parole. He doesn't like me very much now, especially when I'm the one who registers his shots.' 

That was sad enough and it clearly bothered his brother enough that Damian didn't even feel like passing a snide remark at his undesirable company. He bit his lip worryingly and sighed tiredly. 'Is Todd not here?'

'With the outsiders. He'll be back by tomorrow afternoon.'

'Is that his shift to look after him?'

'Mm. Cass is going to take over in three hours. In time for me to go to work.' Damian frowned at his older brother, taking in the dark circles and the exhaustion etched in his face. Tim looked dead on his feet, more then usual. He'd taken up the most shifts in looking after Dick during his treatment, seeing as he was benched himself due to his injuries. But being benched from parole didn't make his schedule any less hectic and Damian doubted he'd spent any of his free time relaxing like he should be.

'I will take over for you. Provided that you spend this hour sleeping and not working on any cases or files.' 

Tim straightened up in surprise, looking pleased yet suspicious. 'Really? Are you joking?'

'I do not joke.' he snapped at his brother coldly, glaring at his cocky smile. 'Take it or leave it.'

'No, no, I'll take it.' the other added quickly, jumping up once he was done bandaging Damian up. 'I'll sleep here. Wake me up when it's time for his shots.'

Damian nodded and got to his feet, taking silent steps to where Dick was curled up and placing a warm hand on his quivering shoulder and passing him a tight smile when the other glanced up at him over his shoulder. 'Richard? Are you alright?'

He didn't receive a coherent answer other then a small whimper and Dick's arm tightened around his stomach. He bit his lip, unsure of how to move ahead with this. It seemed he didn't have to though, as Richard slowly rose into a sitting position and leant forward to rest his forehead against his brother's shoulder. 'I'm really hungry, Dami....'

'Tt. Has Pennyworth not left fruit down here? I can prepare you a small fruit bowl-'

-those don't help....I'm- they help for a while but then the make me feel even more hungry.... Can't I just eat??' Damian felt his heart twist painfully at the _desperation_ in the boy's voice and it took everything he had to harden his heart and shake his head. 

Dick slumped back against his chest and Damian forced himself to remain stoic and not go back on his word. Feeling as if he needed to justify his decision, he spoke in a low tone as he reasoned, 'You know that the serum requires you to fast for 8 hours before you get injected so as to take affect. So far, it has only been six hours.'

'But-'

'-i realise this must be difficult. But we have already assessed that the serum requires you to not have eaten anything particularly filling before it.'

Dick's miserable sigh made him try again, 'Some fru-'

'No fruit.' 

'Have a banana.'

'It doesn't help. I-' a deep growl from his stomach cut him off and he winced as he pressed his fingers into his stomach, his eyes flashing in anger. 'This is not fair! I didn't even need to eat that much when I first got here and you guys got me into the habit of doing it regularly and now you won't let me eat!'

'Richard, that is not fair.' he protested weakly, running a hand through his sweaty mangled hair. 'We're not doing this to be cruel or for a way to _hurt_ you. We're trying to help you!'

'That might be true....but all this is reminding me of is my- my earliest days at the court.' At Damian's confused furrow, he quietly explained, 'Before they started their experiments to make my appetite disappear, they would leave me hungry for days.'

Damian felt as if a bucket of ice water had been dumped over him and he fiercely shook his head as he pulled Dick to his feet, angrily denying, 'This is not- we're not...this is _nothing_ like that! Richard, we would never do that to you-'

'I know.' Dick interrupted lowly, running a hand through his hair and Damian noticed the bags under his eyes had grown much more prominent then he could remember. 'It's hard not to think about it though.'

'You need a distraction.' Damian declared, repeating Drake's words from earlier. At Dick's wary look, he softened his tone and tried to explain, 'Lying around and waiting for the hours to pass will only make the day seem longer. You need a distraction.'

'Like what?' Dick asked dully, wrapping his arms around himself. 'I'm too tired to play or exercise and my head hurts too much to study....'

'If you're tired, you should try sleeping.'

'I can't....I'm too hungry.' Dick sighed and hopped back onto the cot he had just vacated. 'Any other ideas?'

Damian really didn't. Whenever he needed distraction, he would train or spar but Dick wasn't allowed to indulge in any form of fighting, something Damian had been a hundred percent on board with. But with that out the window and all of Dick's usual hobbeies out of the question, he was pulling up short. It wasn't as if he could give any other ideas, he didn't really have any childlike hobbies or interests. He never did. The most normal hobby he had was art and playing with animals but there was no animals to play with in the house, unless you counted his older brother and the bats.

Wait, that gave him an idea. Tim was one of his only siblings to actually have various of hobbies that would not be described as overly _disturbing_ or _violent._ In his opinion, it was mostly trash but Dick seemed to enjoy those activities too so who was he to judge?

'Wait here.' he ordered gently, squeezing his brothers shoulder before leaving the medbay room and to walk to the other room in which Tim was lounging on the bed, _not_ sleeping. Damian tutted as he stepped in and purposely let the door slam behind him to announce his appearance, though he knew Tim was probably aware that he was there.

'You are not sleeping.'

'Can't. Feel lousy.' At Damian's glaring silence, he sighed in annoyance and let his phone drop on his chest. 'I'm not working on any cases or files so I'm keeping our deal. Did you just come here to tell me off?'

'While it is preferable to stand here and point out your _many_ flaws I actually have a task for you.'

'I'm busy.'

'It is for Richard.' like he'd expected, Tim's sneer fell away in an instant and sat up immediately, alert and attentive. 'What's wrong? Is he okay?'

'Not particularly, he is absolutely miserable from this forceful treatment and ravenous from the fast and not being able to consume anything that will actually fill him. He needs a distraction, something that doesn't require him to think too much or move. Unfortunately, I myself, cannot come up with any activity which would tick all those boxes.'

Tim listened carefully before he nodded understandingly, getting to his feet and stretching. Damian hid a wince at the various loud _pops_ that rung through the cave as his brother returned to his normal stance and stopped impersonating a cat. 'Your body is messed up.'

'At least it's not squashed into a four foot compress.'

'I am not four foot, you imbe-'

'Yeah yeah, I'm an imbecile and you're a _perfectly average height, same as father was when he was my age.'_ Damian shut his mouth and his scowl deepened at the pathetic impression. 'You and I can go on for hours but then no work will be done and Bruce has threatened to kick us both out and make us live in the stables if he comes back to us arguing again. So, let's call it a truce.'

'I do not accept. If you start a war, at least have the decency and pride to stand firm on it.'

'Damian....'

'.....I accept the truce.'

'Good. Go get the kid and bring him to the computer.'

'Father said-'

'Bruce would turn a blind eye if Dick blew the whole house up. He's not going to say shit to him for using the computer, don't worry.' 

That was true, his father definitely had the softest spot for Richard. Especially now, when the boy was so utterly miserable and in pain 24/7 and the rest of the family was plagued with guilt for causing it.

He turned on his feet to collect his little brother, letting him lean on his arm as he helped him to where Tim was bent over the keyboard of the Batcomputer, typing away busily. Damian ushered him into the chair but froze when Dick yelped in pain as his wings knocked against the back of it. Tim paused and glanced over his shoulder as Dick kept whimpering.

'Dick?'

'Sorry....just hurts.'

'Your wings?'

'Everything.' came the miserable reply as Dick massaged his side. ' The aches are getting worse.'

'Try sitting straight.'

'It's not helping.' he whined and before Damian really registered what he was doing, he was lifting Dick up and sitting down in his place before placing the other on his knee. He ignored Tim's raised brows and smirk as he adjusted Dick so that his wings were hanging from the side of the chair rather then digging into it. 

Damian tried to ignore how cold Dick felt as he snuggled into his side, instead choosing to focus on being glad that he was at least not being sullenly pushed away.

'Done.' Tim called out triumphantly and Damian watched as the numerous files that were opened up on the screen disappeared to instead show a selection of animated shows and movies. 'What do you wanna watch Dick?'

Dick sat a little straighter and Damian was glad to see a small going in his eye as they spared over the choices before he finally said, 'Johnny West?'

'Test.' Tim corrected gently but chose what had to be the most obnoxious looking show Damian had ever seen. He internally groaned, wondering if it was too late to take his deal back with Tim and make _him_ watch this unrealistic bright disgrace of a show.

He couldn't switch without hurting Dick though. So he pursed his lips, glared at Tim's barely concealed glee and determinedly stared at the screen as loud pop music echoed off the cave wall. 

'Call me if you need anything.' Tim called as he habitually ruffled Dick's hair and left the duo alone and Dick cuddled against him. 

Half an hour in, his head was thrumming with a headache and his eye twitched anytime the odd looking characters pulled off yet another dubious stunt. It was a miracle he hadn't passes any snide comments or jumped in front of the batmobile when Cassandra and father had returned. Though, he would admit that a big part of that was that Richard actually looked....not happy, but not as miserable as he had before either.

He closed his eyes, needing a break from the bright colours but they opened on their own accord when Dick's stomach growled loudly, followed by an annoyed whine asking, 'How much longer?'

Damian glanced at the corner of the screen, where a small digital clock was still glowing and grimaced. Not having the heart to upset the boy again, he muttered, 'Not long now. Just a little longer Richard.' 

Dick groaned and hid his face in his brother's shoulder as his stomach growled again. 'I hate this.'

Not knowing what to say, Damian merely squeezed his knee and held his brother closer, wishing time went faster.

~~

Cassandra watched her brother cautiously, tensing her body in preparation when she noticed the hazy panicked look in Dick's eyes. The last time Dick had gotten into that haze, he'd attacked Bruce and actually succeeded in breaking his wrist. Though, part of the reason he'd gotten so far was because their father was reluctant to actually fight back and had mostly served as a punching bag rather then an opponent.

That was still fine. Bruce had shrugged it off and put on a brace without a bat of an eye. It had been the first incident that had put the family on the edge, what had made them decide to keep Dick in the cave rather then roam around the manor. The first time Dick had gone into the haze of his mind and lost his touch with reality, he'd almost escaped the manor grounds and had succeeded in brutally attacking Alfred and giving him a rather severe injury. To his credit, Alfred had held his own ground with his old military training and had fought the boy off well enough, despite not being able to get away scott free. 

It had been enough for them to realise that Dick couldn't be trusted. Not for now at least, when the serum was messing with him mentally and physically. 

His episodes had unfortunately grown more frequent but none of them was really his fault. Sometimes, the pain and the whole _situation_ and atmosphere pushed him to a breaking point, where he slipped back into the defensive and terrified talon he had been at the start. Sometimes, anxiety and trauma took over and he saw his family as nothing more then enemies.

It was never pleasant to have Dick snarl at them, to fight viciously and mercilessly and to be so lost in his fearful mind that he became almost rabid. It was worse when you knew that underneath the hard jabs and kicks and angry growls, he was frightened and confused. 

She glanced behind her to see Jason was watching them warily from afar, his eyes skittering from the shaking boy to the room where the restraints were stored. They'd had to use it on Dick twice in the last three and a half weeks and none of the times had been particularly enjoyable. Dick usually didn't need them but when he did, he came down from his crazed high while he's strapped in and then it was just awful, because he was scared and apologetic and begged them to let him go. 

They'd made the mistake of taking the restraints off the first time Dick had started crying and it had resulted in quite a few black eyes, the boy slipping back into the trance and attacking them as soon as he had the chance. They'd learnt since then. Now, no matter how much Dick cried or begged, the restraints didn't come off for at least four hours.

She really hoped they wouldn't have to use it today. Bruce and Tim and Damian weren't there and while she and Jason could definitely handle a feral ten year old if they really wanted to, none of them were particularly eager to use their skills on their baby brother. What they couldn't handle, was the tears and pleas. Jason had too much of a soft spot for Dick to ignore him so he usually ended up leaving, something which upset the boy even more. Cassandra had to leave every now and then so as to not let her resolve crumble and give in and her temporary absence was always followed by apologies and sobs. 

The others were better at this. They could tune out the cries and harden their hearts to sit calmly next to the boy, offering a comfort in their presence but not giving in and freeing him. Even Bruce didn't let his resolve crumble.

She rolled her shoulders back and glanced at the tray that held the next few shots. She was suppose to administer them in an hour or so and she really didn't want on shoved into her eye by Dick as he attempted another escape. Covertly sliding the tray to the corner, she shared a grim look with Jason. She saw him give an inaudible groan before he got up and moved to hover near the door, blocking the entrance.

They didn't like this. But if need be, they would restrain Dick and keep him put. They couldn't risk him attacking anyone or harming himself or worse, escaping.

God, she hated herself for thinking of Dick like a _prisoner._ She hated playing a hand in all this.

She couldn't wait till things went back to normal.

On the bolted in chair, Dick shivered and buried his face in his hands, breathing harsh and uncontrolled. She frowned, surprised by his behavior. He didn't seem as if he was slipping into that haze. He didn't even look threatening or pumped up.

He looked like he was in pain.

Near the door, Jason slipped a hand into his pocket and pulled out a new syringe, the one they'd use when they wanted to knock him out for a while. He moved away from the door and edged towards Dick curled up form but stopped when Cassandra shook her head at him. Looking puzzled, he stepped back but didn't put the syringe back, instead opting to hide it behind his back.

Hoping her luck would serve her a favour and treat her nicely, she slowly walked towards Dick and stopped a few steps away, ignoring Jason's warning hisses and head shakes. She swallowed and crouched down on one knee so that she was looking up at Dick rather then down at him. It was a risk really. If this was an act to get them to lower their guards, Dick had a clean shot at her and could easily attack her face, which was the most vulnerable part. She'd be down without much of a fight and he could escape before they caught him.

But if it was something else, she hoped the change of positions made him feel less intimated and less likely to lash out at her. That was really the best she could hope for.

'Dick?'

No answer. He didn't acknowledge her other then shift and she felt rather then saw Jason twitch fearfully. She signalled behind her back for him to not intervene.

'What's wrong?'

She didn't receive an audible answer, at least not at first. Instead, Dick shivered again and her heart tore as he began to sob. She bit her lip nervously, wondering if this was big of an emergency to call her father home from work. But no....no, she didn't want Dick to think they were calling in reinforcement or something....

'Di-'

'I'm cold.'

She blinked, taken aback. That had not been what she expected.

'Want a blanket?'

No answer. She furrowed her brows and shuffled closer, making sure to not reach out and touch him though. She still wasn't sure if this was a setup. 'If not a blanket, then a jacket?'

'It won't help.'

'Er-'

'Kiddo, you can have soup or tea in a while. That will warm you up good but till then, just take my jacket.' Jason turned to retrieve his jacket from the chair he had occupied but froze when Dick asked in a small voice, 'Are you punishing me?'

Cassandra felt her own mouth go dry and she didn't even have to look at her oldest brother to know he was as horrified as her. 'No. Never.' she denied, her ferocity making up for the short denial. 'Why would you think that?'

Dick slowly lifted his head and Cassandra had to bite her lip to stop from wincing at the pale skin and bloodshot eyes. 'When the court got mad, they made it really cold.'

'This isn't the court. We would never do that, Dick.' Jason answered for her and she nodded along with that. She couldn't believe that Dick would even-

'I'm freezing.'

'I- we didn't do anything to-' she waved her hand, frustrated that she was unable to really word her thoughts. When she got too nervous, too shaken up, her language skills deteriorated, despite her being almost fluent in English now. It was an old habit that had never died and right now, it was building a barrier between her and her little brother. 'Not done by us.'

'I feel colder. Just like _them.'_ The last word was laced with venom and you didn't have to be a genius to know who he was referring to. Talons. 

'It's not us. I promise.' 

Dick stared at her and Cassandra, for some reason, found it hard to stare back. She wasn't lying. She really wasn't. Yet, she felt guilty.

She kept his gaze though. She'd grown up as a lier, she knew how to sell confidence even when she didn't have it.

'It's the serum, isn't it?' It wasn't a question. It might be phrased as one, but Dick's tone and accusing glare made it clear he already knew the answer. 

That was why she felt guilty. 

She raised her chin a little and answered as smoothly as she could manage. 'You're body's changing. It makes you weak. When weakness happens....you feel cold.' 

Dick gave a dry chuckle which held no real mirth. It was probably the worst thing she'd ever heard. 

'That's fun.' his eyes wandered away from her to Jason and they hardened as he snapped, 'I'm not going to attack you! You can put that away.'

Curt silence. She was almost afraid Jason would snap back, he tended to do that when he wanted to avoid emotional guilt or feelings. To her relief, she saw Jason pocket the syringe and mournfully say, 'I'm sorry, kiddo. I just-' we had to...' he sighed, seeming to realise that nothing could be said without angering or hurting the boy. 'I'll get you a jacket.'

'Don't bother.' 

'Dick-'

'I can't wear it.'

'My jacket's big, it will cover your wings easily.'

'Not that. Back and wings are too sensitive.'

Jason faltered and Cassandra finally allowed herself to gaze at Dick's wings, which had Tufts of feathers missing and the skin stretched over the bones. The wings laid lamely on his side, though they were tense just enough for them to see that he was in pain. The serums were doing their jobs but as it turned out, growing tissues and cells and stronger bones was painful and came with a loads of body aches and they just seemed to grow worse as time went on. The burden of it fell on to his back and wings, which took the brunt of the effects of the serum seeing as they were going through the most change.

Pity wrung her heart but she pushed it away, determined to try and make the kid feel less lousy. 'Heaters. Portable ones. We'll get those.' 

'I'll get them.' Jason interrupted, looking relieved. 'You stay here with him.'

Dick pulled his knees up on to the chair and perched his chin on them, staring sadly after Jason's retreating back. 'I don't need a watch guard.' he told her, eyes still trained on the now vacant door. She remained standing, knowing that running up to cover it would upset the boy but not willing to completely relax.

'I'm not guarding you. You....are not a prisoner.' 

Dick didn't bother with a reply. His look said it all.

He didn't believe that. At least not fully.

'You are family.' 

He looked up at that and something strange flickered over his face before it was gone, his face a blank canvas. She thought he'd turn away from her but instead, he seemed to be struggling with something, struggling with his inner thoughts. As she watched, a few more tears slipped down his cheeks and she moved without a second thought, reaching forward to cup his cheeks and wipe them away. When his eyes fluttered up to meet hers, she smiled gently, willing all her positive emotions to be passed through it. 'We...do not want- we hate this. We don't want this. But-'

'-you have to.' the younger finished for her dully. He pulled away from her and she found her self missing the warmth, though she restrained from reaching for him again. He hugged himself tightly, his posture defensive and weak at the same time. 'I just want the pain to stop.' 

She wanted that too. More then anything. She wanted that too. 

'Soon.' she tried to reassure but Dick didn't seem impressed. He turned away from her to stare out the window at the rest of the cave, seemingly searching for his oldest brother. 'You can't promise that.'

And she found that she really couldn't.

~~~

Dick could hear them yelling in the cave. 

He turned in the cot, staring at his collection of toys and books scattered on the shelf that Damian and Alfred had installed for him. He let his eyes wander to the colourful book covers as the yells grew louder, his family seemingly forgotten that he was hidden away in his 'room'. 

Or maybe they just assumed he was sleeping. He usually did near this time and after his third shot of the day, he was usually exhausted.

He wished he was asleep. He didn't want to hear this. Today had been horrible enough as it was. More horrible then usual. 

'He is already upset with us, if we introduce him to this one, he'll never forgive us!'

'Damian, for the last time we're not _trying_ to hurt him with this, it's to help him!'

'But he'll _hate_ us!'

'Screw it if he hates us! How many times have you been around when he goes rabid and attacks one of us? He's getting out of control-'

'-because of us!'

 _'Because_ of the serum.'

'He's miserable!'

'Damian, none of that matters if he's _dead.'_

He couldn't help the flinch and blinked away the tears began to build up in his eyes. He didn't want to know what they were planning for him but he didn't think he'd like it any more if it was forced on him with no warning. That was how they'd started doing things lately, with more and more changes and treatments and god knows what else being added without his consent.

Apparently, the whole 'talking things through and telling each other anything new' was only applicable to _him_ and his life choices.

He didn't want to go through this anymore. He hated that he'd been moved into the medbay and that it was forcibly being changed to mimick his room upstairs. He hated that he barely saw Alfred anymore other then for a few minutes a day. He hated that he was constantly in pain and that he was always cold and that his feathers kept shedding and dropping everywhere. He hated that his wrists and ankles were always stained with marks from the restraints that barely faded away before they were back because he'd had another episode.

He hated how much everything had changed.

He hated how his family didn't trust him anymore. Despite constantly being surrounded by them, he had never felt lonelier or more isolated from them. He hated how his family didn't trust him anymore. Despite constantly being surrounded by them, he had never felt lonelier or more isolated from them. Any time he spent with them was constantly plagued with the knowledge that they were keeping guard over him in case he needed to be trapped again. 

They weren't really there or hanging out with him because they wanted to, that had stopped since the treatment started almost a month ago. 

Or maybe they had never actually wanted to hang out with him. Maybe they'd just been keeping an eye on him from the start out of obligation, not care.

Maybe the past 8 months had been nothing but a lie. Maybe he'd been nothing more then a danger that needed to be contained and observed from the start.

'What did I tell you boys?!?' a new voice rung out and Dick internally cringed at the decibel his father's voice was at. He sounded heated, more then normally. That couldn't be good. 

'Father, Todd insists-'

'The brat can't quit being a little-'

Their yells overlapped over one another and he couldn't understand anything anymore and his head was thrumming and now Bruce was yelling with them and god, couldn't his family _speak_ in a normal range??

His lips curled into a bitter smile as his head pounded from their raging screams. He'd wanted this, hadn't he? He hadn't liked being excluded from this part of his family's life, never seeing their negative emotions or their vulnerable moments. They always took great care to not show that side of theirs to him and they'd usually succeeded, but now, when he was in the cave 24/7, it had become harder and harder to hide from him. He'd witnessed his family in horrible states, bleeding out and wounded beyond belief and had heard the worst arguments, heated and uncontrolled.

He'd seen the ugly side of theirs. And it wouldn't have bothered him so much if everything hadn't been so shitty too.

Could he believe that a month ago, he'd been running around the snowy gardens with his siblings, engrossed in a snowball fight and had been content and _happy?_ That he had still full heartedly trusted his family, had looked up to them and believed everything they'd said without even a second thought?

He couldn't believe how much things had changed in one shitty month. He'd gone from the doted youngest child to an unpredictability dangerous prisoner.

But that wasn't even the worst of it. Not really. He could handle the pain, the isolation and the fights. 

The worst was no longer feeling safe.

He wanted to leave. He wanted to escape the needles and the constant empty _we have to's_ and he wanted to escape the yelling-

He didn't know what made him sadder. The fact that he wanted to escape from his family or the fact that he knew he couldn't.

He curled tighter into himself and gripped the blanket tighter, closing his eyes and trying his best to block out the yells and to just go to sleep.

A clatter rung through the cave, followed by even more yells (what were they even yelling about now?) and the sound of fists colliding with skin and his eyes shot open.

He stared at the blurry shapes of his toys and belongings to keep himself grounded, fearing that if he closed his eyes, he'd hallucinate the court again. 

After all, angry yells, bangs and grunts of pain and anger had been pretty much all he heard or witnessed in the court. If he closed his eyes and focused hard enough, he could almost hear Cobb's sleezy voice.

_'Are you going to keep fighting, Grayson? Or are you going to give in?'_

He shivered at the goosebumps that arose on his skin and the tears that had been blurring his vision finally slipped down his cheek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay quick idk what they're called my brain has stopped working. Quick points:
> 
> -No, the family is not trying to hurt him. But they are hiding and lying to him about what kind of pain or symptom he'll experience from the serum which is why they're acting so guilty.
> 
> -No, Dick does not hate them and he's not scared of them, not really. He's scared of the treatment and he doesn't like his family very much right now but he doesn't hate them. He won't reach the point of hate. Greatly hurt, that will be his highest point.
> 
> I hope this flowed somewhat well, I didn't want it to seem that he just jumped from trust to wariness but yeah. Here we go! Dick's in for a world of pain poor guy 
> 
> I promise I love him. He's going to get a happy ending soon, just a few more chapters before he's happy.
> 
> I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THE LONG CHAPTER AND FINGERS CROSSED THAT THE NEXT ONE WILL BE UP SOON! though it might take time, it's going to be as long as this one and have our favourite talon even more sad and hurt.
> 
> Till next time babies! Let me know what you guys think of this chapter!


	13. Treatment (pt.2)

~~~~

Squeeze. Relax. Squeeze. Relax.

He wanted to throw it at something, throw it as hard as he could to express his frustration but he knew if he did, it would catch the attention of his wondering family. He could hear them searching for him upstairs, the worried yells of his name and pounding of multiple shoes telling him that they were getting anxious.

He paused as he heard the _whir_ of the grapple wire being shot and a second later, it sounded more urgently as whoever was on the other end was dragged up into the cave cavern. He paused and crouched down on the floor, crooking his head to try and catch a glimpse of upstairs and noting the thick black boots just as they disappeared out of view. 

Jason was back huh?

Goody.

He squeezed the ball harder, gritting his teeth as the now familiar anger curled in his stomach. It wouldn't be long before they realised he'd changed his usual hiding spot in the caves and would come lower searching for him. After all, there weren't many places he could hide here, at least not from his family. They were the bats. They could sniff out anyone anywhere, and hiding in their turf was pretty much a suicide mission.

He usually did hide in higher altitudes, squeezing himself into tight spots between the rocks and walls to get a few minutes of peace and alone time away from them. It didn't work for long though, they usually managed to extract him from his hiding spots in twenty minutes or less and drag him back to his 'room'.

The ball popped in his hands, foam and cotton squeezing out and the sound echoing loudly in the cave. Dick groaned as silence fell above, his position obviously given away. He threw the ruined toy on the floor, turning on his heel to hop up on the cold bench attached to the stone wall. He wondered if he could get more time if he slammed the cell door shut but it was a hopeless action really, seeing as Bruce had designed the cells and they could be opened with a code. The most he could get was twenty more seconds and a lengthened scolding and punishment.

He could try to make a run for it. Who knows, he might actually succeed in getting to one of the cave exists and if he survived that, he might build up some energy to swim through the humongous lake that surrounded the manor.

Fat chance. He doubted he could outswim his family on a good day, seeing as how out of shape he was. Now, with his pathetic tattered wings and the constant aches and pains in various parts of his body, he'd be lucky if he managed to make it three steps out of the cell.

'Dick.' he looked up from the ball and crooked his head, staring coldly at his father who was now covering the entrance, successfully blocking him in. Huh, he would have thought Damian or Jason would have come to collect him. Bruce wasn't really that good at the whole coaxing him back to his 'room', deflecting his dry jabs and what not. 'What are you doing down here?' 

He tilted his hand and let the ruined remains of the ball fall to the stone floor, innocently stomping on it and shrugging. 'Upper cell. Lower cell. What's the difference?'

Bruce didn't indulge his snide remarks, instead taking a step closer. 'Come back upstairs.' 

Dick stared back defiantly at his guardian, lifting himself to his toes and ignoring the annoying pain that arose in his legs everytime he used them too long. Keeping his gaze locked with Bruce, he hopped backwards, biting his tongue to surpress a groan of pain as he landed on the smooth bench behind him. At least now he was at almost the same height as the man.

Bruce had tensed as he'd launched backwards, no doubt expecting another feral attack or attempted escape. He didn't know why they always got so worried whenever he disappeared, especially after they'd set up so many alarms and safety measures. It was near impossible to hide or escape. 

He pushed the hurt down as he scratched agitatedly at his neck, his finger grazing over the pinched skin where he'd received multiple shots. Some were new, the most recent from a few hours ago. Some were old, needle pinches from the court that had never healed.

He wondered if his family knew that. He had to suppose they did, they were some of the greatest detectives in the world. It would be a pretty big overview. 

He blinked and suddenly, he was not squaring up against his father, but was paralysed in fear and blurry images of covered scientists and blank masks waved around him and he could feel those dreaded needles again, _he could feel them-_

'-should go back upstairs.' Bruce's low voice bought him back and he took in a shaky breath, rolling his eyes as he noticed Bruce momentarily tensing. Jesus, he couldn't raise his arm without them preparing to take him down.

It grated on his nerves more then he could say. 'I don't want to.' he childishly replied instead. 

'You need your shots. You were suppose to get them ten minutes ago.'

'No.' 

Bruce narrowed his eyes, the lack of cowl letting Dick clearly see the lines and wrinkles that appeared on his forehead when he did so. He didn't really see his father a lot now adays, and the few times he was around, he was dressed in his vigilante attire.

It was odd. Batman and Bruce wayne were the same person, no matter how he was dressed. But batman was a mask, one that hardened concretely in the past few weeks, enough that Dick could no longer recognise his father beneath it. After a while, it was just another mask, just another tormenter, another jailer.

He avoided batman, his last few interactions only being when Bruce had physically restrained him or injected his dosage of serum. And now, faced with the cowl-less face of the man, he found himself just as lost and wary as he'd been when he'd been freed from the court the first time.

The man in front of him might as well be a stranger. At this point, Dick might have actually trusted a stranger more then he did the dark knight. He could pretend the stranger was a nice person, someone who would show little to no interest in his and would generally leave him alone. 

Bruce was a different case now. Dick felt cheated by the man and the rest of the family. They'd gotten his guard down, gotten him to trust them and love them and then....had hurt him.

The court would be proud. 

'You can come up yourself or we can take you.'

The _by force_ hung unsaid in the air but the message was pretty clear. 

_'We can do this the easy way, Richard, or the hard way. Whatever you choose. Though, looking at your past guardian, I don't think you have ever chosen the easy way.'_

'So what's it going to be?' he asked, a mirthless smile creeping over his face, half lost in his hallucination. He blinked and Bruce's face was now a sneering image of Cobb and the Grandmaster.

He held back a shiver and shook his head lightly and Bruce was back, staring at him passively, with a hint of confusion. 'What do you mean?'

'I mean _what's_ it going to be? Drugging me? Restraining me? Knocking me out with a hit on the head or knock out gas?'

Bruce's lips twisted in discontent but he didn't let his stern facade drop. 'Why would we do that?'

_'Please, leave me alone. Please, stop, please, ple-'_

Dick had to actually squeeze his eyes shut to block out the noises. He didn't know what was worse, the fact that he could remember his own pleas and could also remember the cries of the other victims of the court.

That might be the worst part of the treatment, he guessed. Not the pain or the constant itch under his skin to get up and _run_ or the mistrust that had been instilled in him in regards to his family.

The worst part was that it had unlocked old repressed memories, ones he didn't even remember having, from before he had been brain washed by his captors. The restraints, the needles, the ultimatums-

All so familiar now.

And he hated that his family had triggered it. They should be the one protecting him from it, not causing them.

'Why would we do that?'

'The court did.' 

Multiple emotions flashed across Bruce's face, before finally settling on what could only be described as upset. 'We're not the court, Dick.'

_He stared in horror at himself, the reflection that stared back at him forming a terrifying image. He looked thinner, paler then he could remember being. His hair was wispy and his eyes were bloodshot red. But that was the least of his worries, as his eyes were drawn to the wispy and bloody limbs that hung on his back and he tipped closer to the water to get a better look, hoping against hope that he was hallucinating. He'd prayed that the extra limbs on his back had been him being paranoid but the court had finally gotten sick of his self denial and had shoved him in front of the lake. Even now, he could see the reflections of the older talons standing behind him, watching his breakdown in amusement._

_Wings. There were wings growing on his back, accommodating the horrible knife like pain his back he'd been in for god knows how long now. They were flimsy and bloody and only had a few clumps of feathers here and there but they were there._

_He had wings._

_His scream and sobs echoed loudly in the underground cave, ignored by his captors as he was dragged away._

He glanced at his wings from the corner of his eyes, grimacing at the unwelcome familiar sight. They were bloody, flimsy and had only a few clumps of feathers left on them. 

Hit a little too close to home. 

'No.' he replied to his father quietly, spreading his wings weakly before letting them drop pathetically. 'I think you're closer to being like them than you think.'

Bruce didn't respond. He looked like he'd sucked on an overly sour lemon.

The pinched look made him more uneasy then he'd like to admit and he found himself lowering his shoulders in submission.

He wasn't an idiot. He learnt from past mistakes. Defiance and refusals were only put up with for so long.

He didn't want his family turning completely in to the court. He didn't think he could deal with that mentally. Because as much as he hated them, and feared them slightly due to their unpredictability, he still loved them. So much 

He hopped down from the bench and shrugged tiredly as he pushed past his father. 'I don't want to see how far you'll go. I'll come.' 

He didn't see the pained look on Bruce's face, his back turned to the man and him already being half way up the stairs. 

~~~~~

'Let me go!'

'Two minutes, kiddo-'

'Let me go!' he smacked his fists weakly at his brother's muscled arms, scowling deeply as Jason tightened his hold on his already throbbing wing. Tim groaned behind him as Dick's head thwacked his mouth. Damian stood to the side, already sporting a bloody nose but still on the ready to jump in, in case Dick actually managed to escape them. 

'Dick, we've done this a million times!' Tim spat out, swinging his legs atop Dick's to keep him pinned longer. 'The quicker we get this over with, the quicker you can go back to doing your thing.'

That was true. Now adays, he would usually just sit and take the shots without much persuasion or restraints. 

He supposed he had still held on to some faith though. He'd hoped his family would at least respect him enough to, _for once,_ listen to him and not force him into doing something he didn't want to.

That hadn't worked out that great, had he?

Maybe if he fought harder, they'd back off. If they didn't back off, even after all he did to fight, then he would _really_ lose all faith in them. 

He arched his back again to try and get away but froze as his chin was grabbed and held taught.

_Fingers pressed into his cheek, no doubt leaving behind bruises from the doctor's nails. He stared at the cold eyes of the man keeping him still, the expression emotionless and almost cruel as the other doctor leant over him and pressed the needle-_

-in to his neck.

He went slack in Tim's hold, eyes wide as saucers as Tim sighed in relief as he pulled the needle out of his neck and let it clatter to the floor. Dick unwillingly leant against Tim's chest, his body paralysed and his heart _breaking._

Too many parallels. Too many parallels to be comfortable with.

Tears welled up in his eyes and he turned his head away from Tim, staring glass eyed as Jason finally injected his third shot of the day into his wings. He felt the familiar chill and he gave up, sagging completely in his brother's hold and closing his eyes to block everything and everyone out. 

He heard them moving around and gathering around him, even felt their pacifying pats but he refused to look at them, keeping his head ducked and eyes closed as he sobbed.

He suppose they still had some care for him left in them, seeing as Tim's hold went from restricting to slightly comforting. He shifted his tiny body in his arms and Dick felt himself being lowered into a horizontal position, the cold metal pressed against his heaving chest and stomach. His cheek, however, was pressed against what he could assume was a jean clad thigh, his tears causing a small wet patch. Rough fingers worked through his greasy hair, Tim's nail scratching at his scalp as he worked through the tangles.

'I'm sorry, pup. I know you hate being para- hate when we use this particular drug on you. I just-'

Dick made an angry noise, that was really all he could do with how utterly exhausted he felt from the injection. He might be helpless to actually sit up and storm off, but that didn't mean he had to sit and listen to false platitudes. 

He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to twitch his fingers to see if he got the feelings back to his body, so that he could get up and out of the room.

~~~~~~

Tim tried his best to concentrate on the jubious animated movie running on the bat computer, reaching forward to turn the volume even higher so as to drown out the chaos coming from the medbay. He glanced to the side as the doors swished open and a bloody Stephanie hurried out from the room, followed by a yelling Damian. He quickly smoothened a hand down Dick's head as the boy lifted his head up from from his leg from where he had curled up. 

He glanced back at the frosted window of the medbay, silently praying one of his fellow vigilantes took pity on him and told them how Cass was. It was always jarring when she got hurt on parole, she barely ever did.

He'd been given the task of distracting Dick while the whole family fussed over Cassandra, with the assistance of Leslie and Spoiler. 

Dick glanced at him through his eyelashes, face furrowed. He managed to glimpse Bruce bent over back, purposely blocking the doorway and Cass before the doors shut again and Tim nudged his cheek to turn back to the screen. He squished his cheek against his older brother's leg, knowing that he wouldn't be allowed to go check on Cass. 

He didn't like the tight ball of metal wrapped around his heart right now. It squeezed with worry and fear everytime he dwelled on the chance of Cass- or really any of his family member- dying, it made him want to puke. 

He was mad at his family. He was really angry at them. But he didn't want them to get hurt or to leave him. Seeing them injured never got easier on him really, no matter how common the sight had become in the past few weeks. 

The door swished open again but Dick didn't try to lift his head to see who it was, Tim's hand tightening to keep him gazing at the screen.

'Cass is okay.' Jason announced to the rest of the cave, and Dick felt the tight ring of worry loosen as Tim sighed in relief. 'She's stable but she's hopped up on a lot of drugs so she won't be up for a while. So keep it quiet tonight.'

'Are you staying?' Tim asked, fingers twirling Dick's long curls as he lowered the volume a bit to have a somewhat decent conversation. 

'Nah, I've spent too long being cooped up here. Damian's yelling is driving me crazy and I kinda want to punch Bruce so I think I'm gonna head out.' a warm gloved hand came up to squeeze his shoulder but Dick shrugged it off. Silence fell over the trio before he heard a defeated sigh and then heavy footsteps falling away.

He turned to squish his face against the jeans, rubbing his cold nose against Tim's uniformed legs, relishing on how rough the material felt against his strained eyes.

The noise from the TV was drowning him and his heart was beating dully and he was just....

....he was just off.

He heard the roar of Jason's bike starting up and then the sound of tires whizzing against the stone driveway as the man drove out and he curled his hands into tight fists. He didn't know how lucky he was, being able to just get up and leave like that, being kept in the loop of things and what not. His wings twitched angrily at his sides and accidentally brushed against Tim's knuckles, sending a shiver of pain down his now absolutely bare wings. All his feathers had fallen completely off, leaving his wings bare and even more hateful than before.

Tim cursed quietly and pulled away quickly, gingerly squeezing his shoulder and making sure he was not in range of accidentally knocking against Dick's wings.

'Sorry bud, didn't mean t-' Dick angrily shook his hand off. Tim paused, confusion weaving over his features. He tried a different area, thinking that Dick's shoulders might be hurting, only to be shaken off again. He frowned, letting his hand fall to the side and staring down at the back of his baby brother's head. 'Dickie?' 

He got no answer. Instead, Dick merely turned his head around to stare at the screen, his face clouded in a way that Tim had come to interpret as anger. He leant back on his hands, stumped by the sudden change in attitude though not entirely surprised.

As more time went on, the more moodier the kid got. But Dick had been relatively okay with him, or at least been on better terms with him then the rest of his family. He'd even grown sour with Damian and Cassandra, which Tim had actually thought was impossible.

But he was still cuddling with him? Dick had stayed far away from him for almost four days now since Tim had to paralyse him due to his freak out, but it had seemed more of the usual wariness of being grabbed and given surprise needles rather then actual anger. And he'd been the one to approach him when Damian and Stephanie and bought Cassandra backs from parole and had cuddled into his neck when Tim had picked him up. Hell, he was still using his thigh as a pillow, and still had part of his cape curled in his fist.

'Dick?'

He spotted a glistening tear sliding down his cheek and he reached out to wipe it but his hand was left hanging in the air as Dick turned his head again. 

Dick's stomach growled loudly and Tom glanced at it, feeling more helpless then he'd like to admit. 'Kiddo? Want to eat something?' 

There was still an hour left till his partial fast finished but.....it wouldn't cause too much harm for Dick to break it just _once,_ right? They'd been keeping his diet strict and had followed the medical rules firmly, but surely once wouldn't cause too much damage?

Dick picked his head up, but only to give him an unamused glare, revealing his red eyes before he let it fall back. 

Tim felt his heart sink to his stomach, at a complete loss now. He....he wanted to shake the kid, to get some kind of reaction out of him, anything other then silent tears and blank stony faces. Dick was anything but silent and stony. He had been like that, but they'd worked months to rid him of that mask, to bring the real him out, and when he had finally come out of his shell, he'd been the brightest, most vibrant soul one could ever come across. Dick was an emotional child, and he wore his heart on his sleeve and his feelings were expressed well. Sadness, anger, happiness, wariness, excitement....Dick expressed them all, whenever he felt them. Tim was used to that. Tim _liked_ that because he understood that. 

This Dick....was worst then the one from ten months ago. This one felt _everything_ but he didn't show it. He held it back, against a mask that was simultaneously cracked and shielded perfectly. Tim couldn't tell what he was feeling or why he was feeling what he was feeling but he could tell that it wasn't good.

The red head character on screen squawked in shock and fell over his tied shoe laces and Tim glanced at the screen and then back at Dick, who hadn't even cracked the tiniest of smiles at the scene. He wondered if he was even focusing on the movie. Did he even know what it was called?

A sniffle rung through the cave. Tim tried to comfort him. He was shaken off again. Dick's fist around his cape tightened.

Tim didn't know what to do. To be honest, he doubted anyone of his family would know what to do. Usually, if someone acted like this and shook off any attempts of comfort, they got the hint and left them alone. But Dick was still sticking close to him, yet refused to acknowledge his presence other then using his leg and cape as a comfort item. 

He decided to push his luck and purposely reached out to grab the kid's shoulder yet again, tightening his hold when Dick tried to violently shake it off. Using more strength than was probably necessary, he turned the boy around to lie straight on his back and look him in the eye, dodging a swipe at his face as Dick lashed out at him. 

He grabbed the offending hand by the wrist and narrowed his eyes, taken aback by the brash behaviour. 'Richard Grayson!' 

His tone may have come off harsher then he intended because Dick's eyes widened and he-

-he flinched.

His baby brother actually _flinched._ From fear of him.

Dick stared at him in fear before he slowly sat up and pulled his hand away roughly, staring at him in a way that Tim had never thought would be directed at him. He shakily pushed himself to his feet and stumbled away from the table, keeping his eyes trained on Tim as he backed away from the older teen. Tim hurriedly got to his feet, unsure of what exactly he'd done that had caused Dick to be _this_ distressed, but he could dwell on that later.

'Dick, hey-'

He froze in his step when Dick almost fell over his feet in his haste to get away from him. 'Leave me alone!' he begged, his voice low and pleading. Tim watched him shuffle back, his shoulders tense and his eyes wide and terrified as he rushed towards his room in the med bay before disappearing behind it, the door slamming shut behind him.

Tim lifted his foot to chase after the boy, but found himself unable to move forward. The way Dick had looked at him-

-that terrified expression had been directed at him. Dick had been scared of him. For just raising his voice a little and gripping his hand too tight. Dick hadn't been scared of raised voices for a long time. 

What the fuck had happened? What had happened between them? How had their relationship gotten so messed up? 

Bruce stepped out of Cassandra room, looking exhausted and old. He dragged a hand down his face, casting a confused look at Dick's closed door and at Tim. 

'Tim? Where's Dick?'

Tim licked his lip and dropped back on to his seat, rubbing his forehead as he rested his elbows on his knee. He gestured to the closed door as an answer but shook his head when Bruce moved to knock on the wooden platform. 

'Leave him alone.' he sighed, leaning forward to shut the computer off, effectively cutting the chappy happy music bouncing off the cave walls. 'He's- he's not very fond of us right now.' 

'What happened?' 

'I don't know.' he answered defeatedly, suddenly feeling as if he'd aged forty years. 'All I know is that we've messed up. Somehow.'

Bruce glanced at the door and then back to Tim, his mouth deepening into an upset frown. ' Messed up what?'

'Everything. I think we've messed up everything. I don't even know how and what, all I know is that Dick might as well hate us.'

Bruce stepped away from Dick's door, looking as if it physically hurt him to do so. He shook his head, raking a gloved hand through his hair, and Tim noticed that his array of gray hairs seems to have grown. 'He doesn't hate us, Tim.' 

Tim recalled the angry shoulder shakes and terrified retreat. 'I'm not so sure about that...'

He turned away from his father and pulled his phone out, scrolling till be found Jason's number and pressing on the message option. He'd have to fix this. He didn't know how he hadn't realised that Dick's outbursts and angry lashes had become reduced to stony silences and defeated half hearted jabs. How they hadn't realised the distance that had grown between them. 

They were going to fix this. The mental strain that the treatment had put on Dick had grown more and more and Tim was honestly afraid it would lead to the boy slipping completely from his fingers.

He wouldn't let that happen. They'd fix this. Him and Damian and Bruce and Jason and Alfred and Cassandra and everyone else in Dick's life. They'd fix this.

~~~~~~~

Damian threw another katana at the bullseye, chancing another glances at the closed door of Dick's room, which had not been opened since last night. Timothy and Father had demanded that the family leave Dick be, had even skipped over his morning round of injections. 

Safe to say, Damian had disapproved of that but had been shut down when he'd tried to argue that it was not wise to let the treatment start slipping. They had insisted Richard be left alone.

His door hadn't even been guarded. The family had stayed away from it, purposefully avoiding it and staying away from any area that was easily seeable from Dick's window so as to not upset him.

Jason stood at the other side of the cave, aggressively punching the bag and sparing his own curious glances at the closed door. He'd returned hastily after Tim's group message but had begrudgingly accepted the terms and had stayed away from the youngest Wayne.

Damian rolled his eyes and threw the last Katana before trying to creep towards the room, but found his way blocked by a bandaged leg. Cassandra shook her head at him from where she was propped on the computer chair, still managing to look threatening.

'Leave him be.' 

'I was not going to interfere.'

'Good. Go back to training mat.'

'You do not have the justification or authorisation to order me around.' he snapped angrily, twisting the urge to kick her injured leg. 'And I can very easily just step around your futile attempts to barricade me.' 

'Listen to her, Demon spawn.' Jason was suddenly behind him and Damian growled lowly as he turned to glare at his oldest brother, their green eyes locked on to each other. 'Leave the kid alone. He can survive two minutes without your mothering.'

'He has been locked away and shielded for almost sixteen hours. His next round is due in approximately twenty nine minutes, and I shall hope that you're not ignorant enough to think he can skip two dosages.' 

Jason wiped his sweaty forehead and sighed. 'He's fine. He's cooped up in his room and safe. Not much to worry about.' 

'Then it shall not hurt to check on him.'

'Damian, stop worrying-'

'I am not worrying!' he snapped haughtily, shaking his head furiously. 'I am merely being smart about this. How many times have we been found in compromising position due to giving him space and he's endangered himself? Do we really want a repeat of that? It is not good for his state.' 

Jason and Cassandra shared a look and Damian knew he was wearing them down. 'Just a glance, Todd. I shall not speak to him or alert him that I am there. He shall not be disrupted.' 

He made to move but found his shoulder being grabbed and he was yanked back. He turned to Jason to yell but was stopped when Cassandra rose to her feet shakily, grabbing a pair of crutches. 'I shall check.' she announced, as she hobbled towards the closed door and Damian bit his tongue to hold in a childish whine about why did she get to check?, Instead choosing to just be grateful they'd actually listened to him.

He crossed his arms and dropped into the chair that had just been vacated and turned his head to stare at the door. Cassandra reached for the knob but paused before raising a hand and knocking delicately, glaring at the brothers when they whisper shouted protests at her. 

She kept her ear placed to the door, clearly waiting for a response but she seemingly got none because her frown deepened and slowly inched the door open.

Damian knew before she turned around that something was wrong. He tensed his shoulders and shared a wary look with Jason as Cassandra hobbled in and flicked the light on.

After a few seconds of silence, Jason stepped forward hesitantly. 'Cass? Dick?'

'He'd gone.' 

Damian shot to his feet, a heavy stone of worry settling into his stomach. 'What?' 

Cassandra hobbled back out the door, her face as pale as it could be and her walk clumsy and unbalanced, nothing at all like she usually was. 'He's gone! He's not here.' 

Damian was rushing forward before he even registered he was moving and gently shoving past his sister to get into the room. He stared in horror at the supposedly empty room and marched forward to pull the blanket off the bed, revealing a few stuffed toys stashed together to somewhat resemble a human body.

Damian felt his hands grow cold as he let the blankets drop to the floor and rushed out, blood rushing in his ears. 'Father!'

_This couldn't be happening again. Not again. Dick couldn't be missing._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry lol
> 
> I swear I love Dick Grayson but it's fun making him suffer and breaking the family apart. But it was leading up to it, wasn't it? People were getting a lot a little to well. 
> 
> Till next time guys :-)) hope you like it


	14. Snowy attack

Jason wanted to shoot someone. Or throw something off a roof. He would like to shoot someone and then chuck their bloody body from the roof of a typical Gotham skyline building.

Preferably someone from the court.

The rest of the family was dispersed around the house, searching for their youngest. They were holding out hope that he hadn't managed to leave the manor grounds, seeing as Tim and Bruce had set up multiple security measures after the first incident, as a way to try and prevent Dick from escaping.

They'd been looking for at least twelve minutes but still no signs. He suppose he should stop hoping and face reality. Dick could have gotten out of here easily in the time they'd been searching for him and the sooner they got him back, the better. It was too dangerous for him to be out for too long.

He pulled his jacket on and zipped it up to his throat snuggly before grabbing a pair of gloves and a scarf, spotting Alfred's warning glare from the side of his eye. He didn't want an argument to spread out, especially seeing how on edge everyone was. 

He almost got to the front door when Tim urgently called out to him and he you're with the idea of ignoring him before deciding that the brat wouldn't be calling out to him if it wasn't important. He changed his route to run upstairs to the second floor, following Tim's yells until he was stood in the door way to one of the many guest rooms the house preserved.

A gust of wind ruffled his hair and he raised his brow when he realised the window was open and Tim was no where in clear sight. That was, until he saw a pale foot poking in the corner of the window, positioned on the roof.

Was that idiot outside on the icy roof _barefoot?_

Jesus christ, how did his family live this long? 

He stomped towards the window, an angry remark on the tip of his tongue as he poked his head out the window to yell at him but the anger died as he finally spotted the reason Tim had been foolish enough to crawl in the snowy roof. 

Dick was curled into the steepest corner of the roof, his bare wings wrapped limply around his body, shivering like a leaf. He had curled his body in to a tight ball, his lips pale and his eyes red and watery. His chest was rising and falling rapidly, in a manner that Jason was not used to, seeing as Dick's respiratory system wasn't exactly normal. That could only mean the boy was having a panic attack.

Tim was gripping the window sill so that he wouldn't fall off, one foot propped on it so as to keep his balance. Jason gently nudged it out of the way so he could climb out, dropping to his knees to match the youngest's height. 'Get inside, Tim.' 

'What? But he's-' 

'I'll deal with it.' Jason interrupted firmly, already shaking his scarf off and edging closer to the child. 'Get back inside before you fall off or get sick. I'll get him inside.' 

He ignored Dick's frightened flinch. That wasn't what to focus on. At least for now.

Tim looked between them, clearly hesitant and Jason resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Dick was more important right now, he could chew out Tim later. 

'Go.' he barked out when Tim still didn't budge. He narrowed his eyes to get his point across and he knew he'd won when Tim's shoulders sagged. He shuffled forward so that he was leaning on the opposite side of the roof so that Tim could crawl in through the window and he waited till he was sure the younger had disappeared before he finally turned his attention to Dick.

He reached forward for him but pulled back when Dick began to struggle, trying to shuffle away from him, closer towards the edge of the roof. He quickly bounced back and landed firmly on his ass, shaking his head and lowering his voice to the gentlest tone he could muster. 'Okay, I'm sorry, I won't come closer. Please don't move around like that, you'll slip.' 

Terrified eyes gazed at him from the corner, Dick's fist curled into snow as he tried to grasp if he was speaking the truth or not. Dick slowly looked over his shoulder, peering at the ground and seemed to assess that Jason was right but he still didn't move away. Instead, he turned back to the elder with the same crazed look in his eye and he opened his mouth to shakily demand, 'I'm not going down there!'

'That's okay.' Jason added quickly, the injection pressing into his back from where he'd quickly stashed it into his pocket. He reached out slowly, hand loose and palm up but he deliberately didn't grab him, so as to not startle him. 'We don't have to go down but can you please just come inside?'

Dick narrowed his eyes in distrust, warily tightening his wings around himself. 'You'll trap me again.'

'Tra- no, hey, that's not what's-' he cut himself off and shook his head. Now was not the time to dwell on defending themselves. Right now, the most important thing to do was to get Dick away from the edge of the roof and in a warmer atmosphere. 'It's cold, kiddo. I know how you get in these kind of weather, and I know how much it affects you. Do you really want to stay out here?'

To be honest, Jason was surprised that Dick had stuck around. The boy may not be in the best shape but unfortunately, he'd been trained to push his body to the limit to achieve his goal and if his endgame really had been to escape, he should have at least gotten a foot out of the gate by the time they caught up to him, despite the new security measures.

Dick curled his legs closer to his chest, wrapping shaky arms tighter around them and gently rocking back and forth. 'It's better than the cave. I don't want to get hurt.' 

'I'm not going to hurt you, kiddo. We'd never-' he paused in surprise when Dick gave him an unamused snort. 

'Can you really use those false promises on me again? After everything you've done?' 

Oh wow, this was worse then he'd thought. No time to fight on that though. He really had no gurantee Dick wouldn't fall and smash his head on the concrete road, and Jason had no clue if his renegation skills were strong enough to heal from that, even with all the alterations that had been going on.

'Please come inside.'

'I want to leave.'

'Buddy, if you wanted to leave you would have. But you stuck around here for a reason.'

He'd really thought he'd hit the nail on the head, had called out Dick's inner feelings of never actually leaving his family but instead, he wobbly admitted. 'I wanted to. But I didn't expect it to be this cold...'

Oh. Oh that explains the panic. Oh now, he felt really bad.

'Yeah, we....uh, we kept the inside of the manor and cave warmer then usual so that you would be comfortable.' 

Dick looked dubious, 'I thought you had purposely lowered the temperature. To keep me docile.'

Jason stared at him incredulously. This was- _jesus christ,_ this was a mess.

'No, we didn't do that. I'm- look, kiddo please just come inside, okay? You're shaking and your obviously miserable.'

'I'm not-'

'-not to the cave. I heard you kiddo. To the fire place, that's all. Far away from.... there.' 

Dick shuffled in the snow again and Jason had to bite down on his lip to stop himself from yelling at him to _get the hell away from the edge, you'll fall over-_

'I can't trust you.' Dick's toes curled in the snow and his voice shook, angling his body to the side in a clear definition of mistrust. He was clearly trying to appear defensive and strong but his voice shook and Jason knew that Dick was aware that he couldn't win any war he bought up. He was weak and if he really tried to escape, Jason could very easily catch him and subdue him and it seemed the boy was well aware of it. 'Not after everything you've done.'

'I- I don't know what to say to you to _make_ you trust us again. But you can't stay out here any longer, you're already getting weak and you're too vulnerable from the serum. It's not safe.' 

When Dick still didn't move, Jason shuffled back so as to pull herself up and perch on the sill. 'I'll stay far away from you. And in your sight so that you can assure that I'm not making any surprise movements. I just don't want you to freeze your as- butt off.'

Dick didn't move. Jason didn't know how else he could grovel but he tried again.

'Please?'

He knew he was dirty for playing with Dick's heart, knowing well enough that the boy could not refuse them for long. He slowly began to get up, keeping a careful eye on Jason as he got to his feet and gripped the bricks tightly so as to not slip and Jason noticed how hard he was shivering and how shaky he was on his feet. 

Dick took a small step forward, but his violent shivering was clearly messing with his balance because he stumbled and dropped to his back and began to slid back.

Jason lurched forward and grabbed Dick's wrist, roughly yanking him towards himself and lifting him through the window, safely into the room. Dick stared up at him, eyes wide like a fish before he roughly pushed at him and before Jason could blink, he was on the other side of the room, gripping his wrist. 

Shit, he must have hurt him.

'You promised!'

'Dick, you were falling. I acted on impulse, I didn't want you to get hurt.' 

'Why would you care! You spent the last month hurting me!' 

'We're trying to help you Dick. I know you can't see it right now now but none of this is to hurt you.'

'Then why?!? Why else would you use the same serum that the court used on me? Why would you use a paralysing drug on me just like _them?_ Why would you inject them in the same place they did? Why would you tie me up and lock me away and and-' 

'- Dick please-'

 _'You promised you wouldn't become like them! You swore to me that you'd stop if it got too bad!'_ Dick's shrill screams were ear splitting and had clearly got the attention of the others because Tim rushed back into view, a sweater pulled on inside out and tightly gripping a copy of the same injection that was stashed in his pocket. He shook his head at him, holding his hand out to stop him and edged closer towards Dick, but stopped when the other hopped up on to the bedside table, still screaming. 'But all you guys did was lie to me and hurt me and treat me like them! I trusted you! All of you!' his voice hitched and it seemed he'd run out of any energy he had managed to preserve as he finally slid down the wall and collapsed on the table. He placed his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. The next words were full of poison and struck like a dagger in to Jason's heart. 'The court was better then this. At least they didn't pretend to be anything but cruel.' 

Jason swore his insides had been turned to ice. He wanted to wrap his brother in a hug and keep him there, safe from all the harm in the world. But he didn't think it would be well received so he perched on the bed instead, making sure his body was lax and his hands were in clear view so that Dick could see he wasn't getting ready to tame him again.

'We never meant to hurt you. I....can see now that we've failed horribly at that but it wasn't on purpose.'

Dick chuckled humorlessly, rubbing his palm into his eyes as he wobbly asked. 'You're all detectives. Can you really not see the similarities? And if you didn't, did you not notice how miserable I was? Am I really suppose to believe that, Jay?' 

Jason winced at the sarcastic questions. Right, they might not have trained him themselves but Dick had always been a clever child. Of course he'd come up with his own theories.

They'd tried lying and hiding information from the boy, under the impression that they were protecting him. 

It was time to be honest. And the way to start was to admit their faults and their short comings.

'Okay Dick, Just listen to me?' He began, glancing at his family outside the room to make sure they're staying put and noting that Alfred had joined the group outside as well. 'I'll admit that we messed up with our decisions. When we came up with the decision to implement the treatment, we only hid it because we knew it would scare you like it has....now. If we told you just how serious this was going to get, you would have freaked out and terrified yourself out of your wits.'

'So this was better? Lying to me and just adding on more new additions? You used the paralysing drug on me! The same type the court used-'

'What? No, no we didn't-'

'Yes you did! I felt it! I saw it! It was the same! Give me some credit, I know that only some drugs work on my kind.'

'We didn't use that one. Like the serum, it has the same properties but-'

'It has _all_ the same properties! I told you I don't want to be more like them and that is exactly what you're doing!' 

'You're hungrier.' Jason added quietly, slowly inching his way closer to the child. 'You get tired more often. Knockout drugs affect you more easily. Do you really still think our endgame is to make you a talon?' 

'It's not to make me human. If it was, I wouldn't still have these stupid wings. I'm not human Jason, I'm a freak.'

'I told you to never call yourself that again.'

'I'm not a full human. I'm not a full talon. I don't want to be stuck somewhere in between. I don't fit with either society. It's.... it's _exhausting.'_

'You fit here. With us. We want you here with us, it's why we're doing all this. It sucks now Dick, but it will get better.'

Dick finally seem to notice that Jason had managed to creep his way closer to him and he jumped back to his feet, jumping away to rest atop the cabinet. 'When?'

Jason kind of wished he was on the other side of the door right now rather then being the one dealing with his emotional little brother. He wasn't exactly the best at this. 

God, he really needed a cigarette. 

He walked backwards and slammed the door in his siblings face, relishing in the slight smug happiness he got at their indignant yells. He leant against the door as he stared up at the boy. 

'You remember when I told you that the journey to recovery is not a straight line? There are dips and curves and so many back steps. This is just like that.'

'It feels like a big step back.'

'Yeah.' Jason agreed, pinching the bridge of his nose like Bruce did and immediately feeling nauseous at the action. He'd definitely been spending too much time in this house if she was picking up their habits. 'It is. I can't deny that. And I know things were great before all this-'

'-they were. Why...why did it have to become so bad?'

'Because if we don't step in now, it would have ended worst. You _need_ this treatment and you need the serums.'

'Did I need to be locked in the cave? Did you need to use those bonds on me? You did a lot of stuff that didn't seem necessary.'

'They seemed like it then. If not overly good ideas, they seemed suitable then. We didn't want you to get hurt.'

'You didn't want me to hurt others.'

'And you. I don't know if you actually remember, but there were times that you tried to hurt yourself or did something reckless when you were having an episode that could have led to you getting hurt badly. And yes, we didn't want you to hurt others. _Did_ you want to hurt anyone?'

Regret and grief flickered over Dick's face as his tense shivering shoulders fell and a tear slipped down his cheek. 'No...I'm sorry I hurt you. And the others.' 

'That wasn't you. No one holds that against you. We just want you to understand that nothing we did was to hurt you or....tame you.' 

'I can't. I just can't.' Dick genuinely looked confused and lost and Jason wished the boy would come down from the cabinet, it looked really rocky and jesus christ _how old was that thing?_ 'I haven't...felt this bad for a long time. It bought up memories I didn't remember and every day came with a new terror that I was back in the court. Do you really call that improvement?'

'I'm not the best person to have this conversation with, kiddo. Even Bruce is better at this then I am. I don't want to come off rough but...no, of course we know that this isn't helping you much mentally. Admittedly, there are a hundred ways we could have gone ahead with this. Actually prepare you for it and tell you everything. Get a fucking therapist. Not assume that it was a good idea to force your bedroom to be shifted to the medbay because we assumed it would be safer. Not just think that you'd understand that we were prioritising your health over everything else. It was a lot to ask for.' _Especially not from a nine year old._ 'I'm just....I'm sorry.'

Dick rubbed his eyes tiredly. 'Just tell me this. Be truthful to me for once. Do you have anything on you to knock me out and drag me back downstairs?'

Jason toyed with the idea of lying but morality came into play. They'd messed up enough by lying. He needed to be honest.

And this was coming from him. He didn't exactly have the highest moral and ethics ground in the family.

'I....do.' he admitted, slowly reaching into his pocket and pulling it out. Before Dick could start yelling or jump out the window, he dropped it on to the floor and stomped on the plunger to dribble the liquid out. 'Not anymore. You don't have to go downstairs. You don't even have to accept our apology. You can take your time and get your head back in peace without us forcing needles in to you. We were suppose to give you a break soon anyway, forcing you to go through the treatment as quick as you can to get it over with.' 

'What was your end game? Bigger shiner wings? Do I have any advantages other then my _tissues and cells_ becoming stronger?'

'We were suppose to tell....nothing new was to happen for a while. Like I said, we tested this serum out enough times to know that there are no dangers involved and they'll strengthen your wings and improve your health. That's a start. But we were working on something else in the next few months.'

'Oh?' Dick leant forward a little, the cabinet tilting and Jason waved his arms as a warning to make him lean back and demanded, 'Tell me.'

Jason hesitated, not wanting to give him false hope when they hadn't even confirmed if what they wanted to do was possible. 

'Dick....that might not be a good idea. Let's just- forget what I said.'

'So more lies and secrets? How well did that work out before?' 

Jason didn't know if he was imaging it, but he swore he saw a familiar angry glint at Dick's eyes. The very same one he'd seen in Damian and even in himself when he came back from the dead. He'd faced confusion, fear, wariness and even happiness. But eventually, the most powerful emotion had taken over. 

Anger.

Jason had spent a large portion of his young second life furious, vengeful, suspicious and hateful. He was better now, had been better for a while but he remembered the hot red furiosity that had burnt his insides, had consumed him really.

He didn't know how he hadn't seen it. Since returning, Dick had been wary and scared, confused and upset, happy and content. 

He'd missed out on one emotion though. A pretty important one. 

Dick had never been angry. Not once. Not at the court, for ruining his life and his childhood, not at his family for their lies and their failures. And while it's absence had been pleasant, it was long coming.

As horrible as it was, Dick needed to feel the anger. Jason knew how bad it went when someone tried to pacify it, it just unravelled worse.

Suddenly, he was glad that he was the one talking to Dick rather then the others. Sure, Tim and Alfred were definitely the sensitive ones of the family but Dick didn't need sensitivity and empty placants. Damian and Bruce wouldn't know how to react, not used to having this kind of anger directed at them by the youngest. Cassandra might do a better job but she might not understand the anger as well as Jason did. They might all get taken aback by the anger and unsettled and sedate him because they thought he was a risk.

Dick didn't need that. It would ruin any last shred of saintly hope and faith he had with his family.

He took a step away, and then another, and then another.

'I can't tell you more. I'm sorry. All I can offer you is that we'll leave you alone, _providing_ you stay put in the manor. And you can take your time, until you're ready to forgive us and trust us again. You can stay anywhere you want.'

'Far from the cave.'

'Where ever you want. We'll discuss continuation of the treatment after you forgive us.'

'I don't know if I can. I don't...I don't trust you guys to keep me safe anymore. I don't know how to forgive you. I don't know what you can do to get it back.'

That hurt. Jason would admit that it hurt a lot to know that the most trusting and forgiving family member no longer viewed them with apple eyes. But he could shoulder it. He knew they deserved it.

'We'll earn it back. Until then, I swear you'll get your alone time. I'll tell the rest of the family to leave you alone. No matter what.'

They would step in if Dick's health started deteriorating or if he could become a threat to himself and others. But he held it back, knowing it won't be appreciated and would probably lead to either more escape attempts or lying about his health to them.

He opened the door, staring blankly at his siblings curious and worried faces, pausing only to give Dick a small smile when he mumbled, _thank you_ , before shutting the door and bracing himself for the load of arguments that were about to start, following his decision.

The things he did for these brats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are baaaaaad.
> 
> Dick won't get a break for a while. On the bright side, his family's going to be suffering a bit too. Not as much as Dick has suffered but oh well.
> 
> Forgiveness won't come easy. Still not sure if it'll be in one chapter though, I don't know how I'll unravel his turmoil of feelings.
> 
> Thank you for reading :-)))) I really hope you guys liked it, I'll admit it isn't my best work.


	15. Out of your reach

'How could you tell him that we'd _stop?!?_ We can't! We were suppose to lessen the dosage, not stop it completely! This wasn't part of the plan!'

'And traumatising him to the point of being reduced to panic attacks and escape attempts _is?!?_ Plans change-'

_'This one can't!'_

Alfred's eye twitched but he forced himself to keep his faux aura of calm, continuing to slack butter on the second slice of toast for the sandwich he was preparing for Dick, who had taken to hiding in the attic after Jason had ushered his family away from the bedroom he'd been trapped in. 

'Lower your fucking voice! He'll hear you.'

'Good, then at least he'll be mad at you for lying and not at us for _breaking_ your undiscussed promise.' 

He placed the toast on the sandwich and pressed down in it to make sure it was not going to topple off before picking it up and placing the plate on the tray. He wove around the rest of his charges to the whistling teapot and picking it up. 

'What the hell do you want to do, then? Climb up there and forcefully drag him down? Hop him up on drugs and restrain him until you completely _break_ him?'

'I don't know, all I want to do is make sure he doesn't _die_ because of incomplete DNA. I don't really have much else to worry about because I'm too busy trying to prevent his body from giving up?'

Alfred's hands shook as he poured the tea in the smallest mug they had, the one with multiple super heroes logos scattered over it. Some of the tea sloshed out the cup on to the tray and Alfred bit down on his tongue to surpress a curse. He picked up a napkin and wiped the droplets, watching Damian creeping closer to the door.

'Where the hell do you think you're going?'

'While you buffoons continue to lash at each other's throats, I am actually going to get something done!'

'You're not disturbing him, Damian!'

'You are absolutely no one to order me around!'

'I am your older brother! Get your gremlin ass back in the kitchen.' 

'Drake has made valid arguments, Richard is not in his right state of mind and he clearly does not understand the repercussions of his actions and the-'

'Dick does not need us making every single decisions for him! You're going to fucking respect that or-'

'If father was here, he would agree with us! Richard is not to be trusted alone and I refuse to let him injure himself just because _you_ are too foolishly arrogant to acknowledge that your decisions are pathetic!'

'I do not have to defend my decisions to you, Damian.' Jason snapped angrily as he stomped over to the younger one and grab his arm roughly, ignoring Tim's following yells. Alfred had to enlist extreme control to stop himself from hiding his face in his hands. 'You're the kid here, you are not the one in charge. Get that through your head!'

'Neither are you! Father is the one who should make these decisions, he should decide if Richard-' 

Alfred was at the end of his limits. He slammed the biscuits he'd pulled out of the barney on to the plate before turning to his three grandsons with an angry glint in his eyes. It was enough to shut the three up and they floundered under his furious gaze, accidentally straightening in to a line as they unconsciously shuffled away from the angry man.

'That.' he said quietly, his voice carrying menacingly in the empty room. 'Is absolutely enough. I do not want to hear another _word_ out of you three. How _dare_ you utter such words in my presence? How dare you belittle each other with such ease? I understand the last few weeks have been tiring to say the least, bt _none_ of you have the right to make this decision anymore. Not any of you boys _or_ Master Bruce.'

'Alfred-' Tim began but whitened immediately at Alfred's glare and icy, 'Do not interrupt me, Timothy.'

The young man immediately averted his eyes and chose to stare at the floor, clearly intimidated. 'Master Jason made a hasty decision. I shall not argue with you three in that part. But he did it out of care. Master Dick has made it abundantly clear that he's unhappy and scared and that this family no longer makes him feel safe. I understand the seriousness of the treatment and that an abrupt stop will do him more harm than good, which is why I shall allow you to come to a sound agreement on how to move forward with it and how to _calmly_ explain to master Dick why you have chosen to do so. Till then, the boy is not to be disturbed or manipulated in to coming out any sooner than he is ready. Understood?'

It was the days he'd spent commanding the british army in his fighting days that brought out his stern commanding tone, the one that could have the most furious and powerful of men cowering and nodding meekly. Such as right now, three of Gotham's dangerous and ominous vigilantes stood shamefully in front of the old butler, their heads ducked in a school boy manner that Alfred had not seen them do for quite a while.

He nodded in satisfaction and picked the tray up, turing to walk out the doorway, only pausing to dish out the last few of his orders before he exited. 'Master Damian, go back downstairs and keep your sister company and make sure that she is comfortable. Master Jason, please contact Miss Barbara and inform her of Richard's actions and seek her advice with how to go forward. Master Tim, kindly gather Master Dick's next round of shots and ring up Master Bruce to inform him of what has unravelled at home. I am not foolish enough to believe that you won't be discussing your fight with them, but I do ask of you to think of each other's argument with a more clear mind. I shall be taking this up to Richard, seeing as he has abstained from his meals far longer then I would normally allow and I do not want any of you hovering around or following me. Give him time.' 

With that serving as his parting words, he left the brothers alone, trusting that they would, for once, chose to actually listen instead of indulging themselves into pointless fights. They were good kids, they were, but they were also unbelievably stubborn and seemed to enjoy angering the other. Alfred could only hope that his rare _serious_ scolding would be enough to sedate their natural instinct to squabble.

He carried the tray up the stairs and through the hallway, his polished shoes tapping elegantly against the wooden floor as he made his way to the closer attic door latch, pausing at its right and placing the tray on a delicate table. He paused and glanced up, unsure of how to move forward from here. He pondered over leaving the tray there with just a knock on the latch door and disappearing. But he had no gurantee that Dick would actually eat it and he didn't want to leave him without some kind words.

He reached for the cord hanging from the latch that would allow him to unfold the foldable stairs and open up the entrance to the attic but he decided to opt for knocking instead. He reached up to his toes and rapped his knuckles sharply and gently called out, 'Master Dick?'

He recieved no verbal answer but he did hear hurried shuffling and the sound of multiple boxes toppling over. He sighed lowly, and knocked again. 'Master Richard, I have bought you a few sandwiches and biscuits. I merely want to talk.' 

'Go 'way!'

'I shall do no such thing.' he refused, keeping his tone as soft as possible. 'I am concerned about you. I just want to check on you.'

'I'm not going downstairs! Jason promised-'

'- and I have every intention of honoring that promise. Please take my word, my dear boy, I merely want to talk.' 

The silence that followed was almost suffocating and Alfred considered leaving and walking away, the boy clearly not very eager to talk right now. 

He took three steps away until the door fell open invitingly. He paused and spun around, grateful for the chance. Dick's ankles came into view as he slowly climbed down, but stopped at the second stair and settling down on it, his wings wrapped around himself and his shoulders hunched, posture tense and defensive.

He took a deep breath, putting a calm reassuring smile over his face as he stepped around the ladder to stand in front of him. The youngest family member looked exhausted, deep purple eye bags imbedded into his pale skin.

Alfred plucked the mug off the tray first, holding up the warm tea to the boy first. Dick looked at it warily, tilting the mug to peer at the liquid within it with obvious suspicion.

'Is this drugged?' 

Alfred felt his mouth pull into a sad frown, shaking his head. 'I swear on my life, it is completely clear. It is just tea.' 

Dick looked between the mug and the butler, a war of emotions ranging in his eye before he finally made a decision and took a tentative sip. He seemed to relax as the warm liquid seeped down his throat.

He sagged against the wooden stair and the side of the rail, eyeing the butler warily. 'So.....how mad are they?'

'They are quite upset. But not at you.'

'And Bruce? How long do I have before I get cornered again?'

'I promise you, Master Richard.' Alfred began solemnly, reaching out a gloved hand to place on the boy's knee, ignoring how he tensed. 'You are not getting cornered. I assure you, you will be allowed to stay....wherever you choose for how ever long you wish. I can set up your room again, have your stuff arranged to be bought up-'

'I'm staying here.'

'Master Dick, the attic is dusty and cold and cramped-'

'It's far away from the cave. It's the furthest it can get. And I have more time to defend myself if someone tries to drag me down again.' 

Alfred didn't like that idea and he didn't like allowing Dick to believe that his family would swoop low enough to attack him, but he knew that it would not be well received so he backed down. 'If you wish. At least let me fetch your blanket so that you can stay warm.'

Dick nodded, glancing at the buiscuits and sandwiches in longing. Alfred immediately offered the plate of buiscuits up to him, nodding encouragingly as he plucked a chocolate one up. He nibbled on it thoughtfully, the half empty tea cup shaking in his hands. Alfred reached out to took it gently, placing the mug on his left hand and holding the handle of it with the second, as he prepared himself for what he was about to say.

'Master Richard.' he began slowly, forcing himself to meet his youngest Ward's eye as he spoke. 'I....am deeply sorry that I didn't step in before the situation got out of hand. I should have paid more attention to you and how badly this whole ordeal is affecting you. But I want you to know that none of us meant to hurt you.'

Dick sighed tiredly and sagged against the wooden railing, breaking a butter and milk buiscuit in half. 'It wasn't your fault. You were....the only person who was nice to me till the end.'

Alfred mouth twisted in disdain but he quickly rubbed it off. He might be quite upset with his son and his grand children for how they had acted but he couldn't let Dick continue thinking his family didn't love him. He pulled a chair up and sat down, gripping the mug in his hands.

'Master Dick, you have every right to be upset with us. We betrayed your trust and lied to you time after time. And I know you must be getting quite tired of hearing the same phrases again and again. But our intentions was not to hurt you. We have gone about with this.... completely wrong. But do not doubt your family's love for you. They are stubborn and protective and very hard headed, but open talks and discussions are not their strong point. They're buffoons, but they're not heartless. This is not any easier on them as it is on you.'

Dick snorted half heartedly, crumbling the remains of the biscuit in his hands as he gritted his teeth. 'You can't just blame this on short sightedness. Part of it has to be deliberate Alf.'

'Why would you say that?

'Why didn't they just do this when I first came back?' he asked quietly, uncurling his hand and turning his palm upside down to make the crumbs drop on the floor. 'I was...I had no expectations from them. If they strapped me down there and then and started injecting me with random serums. It would have hurt less.'

'Richard-'

'-instead, they spent months bonding with me and making me trust them and then unloading all this on me.' 

'Master Dick, we had not yet confirmed the vulnerable state of your wings back then. When we got you back....Master Bruce- everyone was just so relieved to see you alive and breathing. At that time, we merely gave your wings an overview, as we were too overjoyed to have you. And if we had began the treatment in your first few weeks here, you would not have trusted us at all.' 

Dick shrugged, gratefully taking the napkin Alfred offered. 'I had no faith in them or their intentions. If they had acted without my consent then, I wouldn't have been so....so hurt.'

'But not any better.' 

'I guess not.' 

Alfred stood up and placed the mug on the table and handed Dick his sandwich. 'The most I can do now is to remind you of how much your family loves you and to ask us to find it within your heart to forgive our brashness and our broken promises.' 

'Broke-?' Dick pulled his knees up and placed his head in his hands, his fingers pressing into the slightly moist bread. 'There not going to stop the treatment, are they?'

'I shall....allow Timothy to explain why. He has his reasons.'

'That's great. After all that, they're still breaking their promises and going back on their word.' 

'You can stay up here. Your belongings shall be bought back up. No one in the family will ever come close to with any forms of restraints or paralysing drugs again. No one shall come in until you allow them to and I shall deliver your meals straight to the attic. The only time that any one shall walk in is to deliver you your dosage, without any deceptions or additional precautions. No lies. Not anymore.' 

Dick stared down at his feet, shaking his head before shoving the remainder of his sandwich into his mouth and chewing thoughtfully. Alfred sighed and stood up, knowing that he'd done his best. 'Don't hate them, my dear boy. Despite their problems and their facade, they won't be able to handle that. If you need anything, I'll be checking on you every few hours, so if you need anything, I shall be available.'

He picked up the tray and walked away, heading towards the stairs, glad to see the rest of his charges had followed his orders. A small voice called out to him as he neared the first step. 'I don't hate them, Alfie. I don't think I ever could.'

He smiled at the child, despite knowing the boy couldn't see him, his heart feeling lighter then it had in days. 'I'm glad to hear it. We shall always support you and be there for you, Richard. That is what family does after all.'

~~~~~~~~

'I want Alfred to give me the serums now. Not you.' Dick's words were clear and cold, cutting through Tim's heart easier then a hot knife cuts through butter. He should have expected this really, Dick had thrown a humongous tantrum the first time Tim had showed up in his new space to register the new shots, the very next morning after Alfred and his talk.

Safe to say, Dick hadn't taken it well. He'd jumped to the highest place he could get to and had all but _snarled_ at him when he'd first arrived and it had taken longer then Tim would like to admit to coax him down to take his dosage. Even then, he had to take several kicks and slaps as he had some what restrained Dick with his body while he injected him with the serums. It had not been recieved well. Every time he came upstairs to give the boy his shots, it was the same story. Dick fought back and lashed out at him both verbally and physically until he couldn't anymore and would grow quiet and sullen when he realised he wasn't going to win.

It had been silent treatments, spiteful glares and deep scratches when he eventually got too upsets for days now. Tim didn't know how long he could keep this up to be honest, Dick's brutally open anger on him was taking more out of him then he'd like to admit.

Tim had very effectively went from Dick's self claimed favourite brother to his worst enemy.

Tim stared at his baby brother, an argument on the tip of his tongue before he forced himself to swallow it and ignore his own hurt. If that was what Dick wanted, Tim would do it. So what if that would mean he would barely see the youngest? It was own fault really. He hadn't even realised just how limited his time had become with Dick, they barely spent time together anymore and when they did, he was usually trying to calm and restrain Dick while he registered his shots.

If he stopped doing that, he could kiss his and Dick's relationship goodbye. And it wasn't like he _liked_ having such a shitty relationship with Dick, he wanted to go back to the way they were. When Dick had become so comfortable with him that he would launch himself at him whenever Tim entered the room, no longer wary or scared of physical contacts after _months_ of Tim being the one to initiate hugs. Tim had gotten very good at penguin walking with a ten year old standing on his feet and tight arms encircled around his waist. He had liked Dick stealing his phone to play games on and nagging him to watch stupid movies with him and tugging at his sweater when he had a nightmare or was having an off day and wanted a cuddle.

Dick had become so comfortable with him, enticing him in dozens of pointless debates and arguments, giggling happily as he purposely made dumb arguments just to frustrate Tim. He had come so far out of his shell and had genuinely grown to be confident and content with him.

And now he'd ruined it. He wanted to fix it, he wanted to fix it so bad but he didn't know where to begin.

He suppose respecting Dick's wish would be a good start. So he forced himself to nod, ignoring the bitter taste in his mouth. 'I'll have to teach him and I'll....stick around to make sure everything goes where it's suppose to, but once he gets the hang of it, I'll leave you alone.'

Dick nodded but looked as if he regretted his harsh wordings. He shuffled around, pulling the blanket that Jason had bought up for him tighter around himself, peeking over one of his wings cover. 'You...you can still come here. Uh-' 

Tim felt his heart swell in gratefulness and he smiled, lifting his hand out of habit to ruffle his hair but quickly pulled it away when Dick flinched away. He shook his head, biting his tongue to repress a curse. 'Sorry.' he apologised lowly, going back to gathering the empty syringes. 'Old habits try hard.'

Dick shrugged, rubbing his cheek against the soft fabric of his blanket, one hand absentmindedly reaching for his wings, which had started growing feathers again. Small pores had opened up and Tim tutted, shaking his head to make Dick stop. The boy let his arm drop, going him an apologetic shrug as Tim went back to cleaning up the attic.

'Tim?'

'Hmm?'

'Who did you test the serum on?'

Tim froze, warily glancing at Dick, who was trying to appear innocent and nonchalant. He cleared his throat, wiping his face from any emotions as he picked up his pace. 'Why do you wanna know that?' 

'Because I want to.' came the short reply, Dick dropping his act. 

'Dick-'

'-I have the right to know!' 

'Yes you do.' he began carefully, eyeing the heavy album discarded on Dick's left. He wasn't looking forward to having it thrown at him. 'But no good will come out of it. It's tested and it's completely safe, so no worries-'

'You want me to trust you?' Dick asked shortly, his eyes glinting in anger and Tim really wished the book was further away from his brother's reach. 'Then stop lying to me and hiding stuff from me.' 

_Be truthful with him. We have tried your ways, now let's try the honest way._

Damn it, it was like he had a tiny Alfred perched on his shoulder chattering into his ear in a posh british accent.

He sighed in defeat and resisted the urge to rub his forehead, where a pinching headache had suddenly arose. 'Don't freak out.' he began, settling on a dusty box and fixing his eyes on the box of syringes as he pretended not to notice Dick curiously leaning forward. He took a deep breath before carefully stating, 'We tested it on Cobb.'

He heard a gurgled choke and Tim heard the album book fall heavily to the ground. Dick's eyes were wide and his face had grown pale. When he opened his mouth, the sound that came out was as if someone had tied a rope around his voice box. _'Cobb?_ My _grandfather?_ You saw him?!? Why would you go near him-'

'Woah woah woah.' Tim soothed, holding his palms up as a way to placate him. 'Take a breath. And think about what I said. We weren't _collaborating_ with him, we tested potential serums until we found the safest one.'

Dick stared at him as realisation dawned on him, feeling bittersweet about the answer. 'You experimented on him...'

Tim nodded, expression hard and guilt free. Dick tightened the blanket around himself, unused to seeing his brother look so cold and harsh. 

'Wh- why? How could you-' he paused, not wanting to ramble and stray from the point. 'Why him?'

'Why not him?' Tim asked, shrugging as if he was discussing pizza toppings and not something that could easily pass off as torture. 'He took you away from us. He hurt you and tortured him. He did it to multiple people and _enjoyed_ it. He's lower then the scum of the earth and I have no regrets in what I did.'

'Does.....Does Bruce know?' 

Tim's jaw tightened and his voice was clipped when he answered, 'Yes.'

Dick blinked, taken aback. He hadn't been kept in the loop of the whole vigilante thing, but he knew how Bruce felt about them taking justice and punishment in to their own hands. The bats bought justice by capturing bad guys and handing them to the authorities. They didn't punish or....or torture bad guys based on their own bias. So-

'-How was he okay with it? He's batman, he's-'

'-a father.' Tim finished, 'Cobb went after his son. And you should know by now how protective he is of you. He's protective of all of us. The only reason Joker wasn't killed when Bruce caught him after Jason's death was because Superman stepped in before it got too bad. His morals are high but he's still human and a parent. From first hand witnesses, they tend to lose all control when their kids safety and health is threatened.' 

Dick looked lost, and Tim guessed that he, just like the rest of them, was lost in the war of their ideologies crashing. This was probably hitting too close to home, knowing that his family was experimenting on the court just as the court had done to him. 'The serums wouldn't have killed Cobb. Hurt him, sure. They hurt him bad. But we all made sure that it wouldn't kill him. Maybe Bruce wasn't completely on terms with the testing but he could hardly argue that it was undeserved or unnecessary. He didn't participate in it himself but he didn't step in to stop us.' Tim paused at Dick's confounded look, feeling slightly bad for throwing all this information at him in such a sensitive time. But he didn't know how to reassure him that their integrity was still intact without lying. 

'We don't regret it, Dick. I'd do it again. I want to do much worse to him but morality and ideologies come in to ploy.' 

'But- but, okay.....but how was that... that's dangerous, right? These serums are meant to make me stronger, wouldn't they make him stronger?'

'He was paralysed with cold when we injected him. We also had....extra measures- _and I'm not telling you what_ \- to make sure that he wouldn't gain any new strengths or powers through it. He's weak and unchanging. He's not a risk.'

Dick stared at him before slowly dropping his gaze to the needle puncture on his wings before his eyes darted back to Tim. 'That's not all you did with him. Did he help you with developing this serum other then serving as an experimenting Guinea pig?' 

Tim blinked, surprised by the bluntness. He'd almost forgotten how cleverly Dick spoke and how smart he was. After all, he'd found out all their identities at the age of eight and had even solved crime mysteries by pouring over their missions whike he was trying for Robin. 

He opened his mouth to try and defer the topic and deny it but Dick had come to his own conclusion and had shuffled away until his back hit the window. 

'What does the serum contain? You said you made alternations, what part did he play a hand in-?'

Damn it. Why was he trapped up here answering all these questions? He felt cornered, any lie he came up with sticking heavily in his throat. 

'Blood.' he found himself answering honestly. 'We took some blood of his to test it. And it's...'

_'...it's in the serum?!?'_

'I know you don't want anything to do with them-'

'You put his DNA in me?!? How is that making me-'

'It's altered, Dick. Just like the serum, just like everything else. I've defended myself enough on this. I'll be the first to admit that our family has a paranoia problem and is overly analytical over everything and you know that. _Why_ would we purposely endanger you? We made sure the serum was perfect before using it in you Dick. We would have made sure of that before we tried it on _anyone,_ of course you would only be given it only after we were 102% percent sure it was safe.'

Dick shook his head, wrapping his arms around his coiled knees. He shook his head, trying to wrap it around the array of information he'd recieved. Tim stood up slowly, faltering when Dick shook his head angrily at him. 'I need to think- this is too much. I just need to....I wanna be alone.' 

Tim sighed, upset. Everytime he extended an olive branch to repair his relationship with Dick, it somehow got snapped in half before it could even grew out it's first leaf.

He didn't know how many more he had left before they stopped growing. 'I'm sorry for hiding all this from you kiddo. But I'm not sorry for what we did.' 

Dick shook his head, reaching blindly for the bottle of water rolling around on the floor. 'Please....alone-'

'Okay....okay.' he agreed, kicking the latch door open and stepping down. 'We love you kiddo. Just remember that. Please.'

~~~~~~~~

Damian stood stoically at the foot of the stairs, as yet another angrily crumpled paper ball was tossed at him from the attic. It would seem that Dick had decided the best way to non verbally communicate when he didn't want his family any where near him was to sprawl angry notes and toss it at them. 

'Richard.' he heard an angry grunt and Damian heard the sure sounds of another page being ripped. He sighed and glanced back at the window, staring at the darkening sky. In a matter of minutes, the lightening and thunder would start and Richard would be terrified out of his wits. He usually hallucinated members of the court when a storm started brewing and since the last few months, he could only assume it would get worse. 'Richard, Cassandra has informed me that Gotham is to expect a tremendous storm, one of the very worst.' 

A loud rumble sounded from outside and Damian glanced outside again. The clouds were getting darker and Dick hadn't answered yet. He tried again, 'I am aware that you are not particularly fond of such weathers. And the attic's height and structure will assure that it's louder. I know you are not fond of battling these situations alone so why don't you come downstairs?' 

This time, three paper balls were tossed from the latch and Damian shoved down the flare of anger and indignation that arose at being treated such a way. This was Richard. His little brother who was going through a lot of emotional turmoils, according to his older brothers. He had to be patient. 

He reached up to grip the wooden rail but pulled his hand away when Dick's hand shot out in lightening speed to push it away.

Dick's head shot out from the roof, his long hair flopping off his forehead to hang limply in the air, hanging upside down like a bat. 'I want to stay here. Go away.'

'Richard, we do not want you to come down for our own gain. You do not want to be stuck up there in a tight space where the storm is brewing and loud-'

'Why don't you guys get it?!? I would much rather stay stuck here up alone than be downstairs with _you!'_

Damian's mouth shut with an audible _click_ and he took a step back, haughtiness and annoyance slipping away at the pure _venom_ in his little brothers voice. Dick sounded hateful and his glare was cold, in a way that it made ice seep through his veins and a tight coil wrap around his heart, making it suffocating to breathe. 

This was....this was bad. Dick was literally telling him that he'd prefer bearing the storm alone- something which had always scared him- to being with his family. That wasn't....that wasn't how it was suppose to be.

His family hadn't told him how bad it really was with Dick. Or they had but he'd thought they were merely being over dramatic and worrying too much. But now, he was thinking that they might have _down played_ just how distant the boy had become.

He didn't want to leave. He wanted to drag Dick out of the attic , frustrated with the tension and anxious (though he wouldn't verbally admit it) about having the boy away from his sight for so long. He wanted to stomp his foot and demand for Richard to stop this nonsense and come down, so that they could _fix_ everything.

He'd admit though, he didn't know how to fix it. He didn't know how they could reassure him that he could trust them or even what to say to reassure him. An apology, no matter how big of a deal it was for Damian to admit he was wrong, would not suffice to Richard after all the hurt he had been through.

It couldn't be that easy right? Dick had been hurt, so so hurt by them, to the point where he'd had to hide out in his own house from his own family. 

It couldn't be that easy. They couldn't fix this with a few simple words.

 _Gestures_ would speak louder. 

Respecting people's privacy was.... not really Damian's storing suit. But contrary to popular believes, he did love his family, no matter how idiotically dumb they were and how wrong their choices seemed to him. Richard deciding to spend the storm alone seemed foolish to him but....

.....it wasn't his choice. It wasn't his decision to make. Just like a lot of them hadn't been.

He forced himself to clear his mind, to think clearly and like a brother, not like a dictator. 

The part of him that was overly used to giving orders and controlling everything demanded that he went through with his initial plan, needling the boy and using any force necessary to bring him out of the attic and instead to use the part of him that had been subdued by the league of assassins, that urged him to do what the kid wanted.

He was concerned about Dick bearing the storm alone. But a part of him had been using that as an excuse to try and weasel the boy out of his hiding space. Dick might be scared of storms but he wasn't fragile. It had been one of their worst mistakes assuming he was so.

Dick was an affectionate kid but he had never been one to be overly coddled. Making decisions for him based on their assumption that they knew best had not worked out well for either of them.

Dick needed space. Damian.... Damian would respect that.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a wrapped brownie, reaching up on his tiptoes to place the gooey treat on the highest step. 'I...apologise, Richard. I shall leave you alone. But I- I bought you a brownie on Pennyworth's request. He claims that it cheers you up.' 

He waited for Dick to reach out and snag the treat but when no movements were made, he sighed in defeat and made to move when Dick hesitantly poked his head out.

'Wait...'

Damian stopped instantly, staring with somewhat wide eyes at his little brother, you he hadn't seen for a while. He wondered if he was being dramatic, or if Dick had actually managed to grow paler in the few days he'd been hiding out. He waited for Dick to continue but when he stayed quiet he gently urged, 'Yes?'

'I don't want to- I see _them_ when there's a thunderstorm. I don't want to hallucinate you guys as one of them.' 

Oh. 

_Oh._

He didn't like that. He didn't think he'd like the answer to his next question either but he still asked, 'Has that.... happened a lot?'

Dick stared at him owlishly, unblinking before giving an upside down shrug. 'More then I'd like to admit.'

Damian felt as if someone had squeezed something bitter down his throat, making his insides churn with disgust at the knowledge that he and the court could be deciphered as one. His head spun, despising himself for becoming someone that Dick could fear rather than trust. And it hurt so much more because even now, even at a time that Dick had made it clear that he wasn't their biggest fan, he still pushed himself to make them happy and hadn't let Damian walk away thinking he was hated. Once he had deciphered that Damian was hurt and upset, he'd pulled himself out of his hiding place and offered an explaination, unwilling to let his brother think he _hated_ him. 

He was a good kid. He didn't deserve any of the crap he'd been put to, not at the hands of the court or at the hands of his family. 

An embarrassingly tight lump had lodged itself into Damian's throat and he really didn't want to guilt trip the kid by crying in front of him. He wanted to comfort the boy, to offer his apologies, to say _something._

He was blank though. Nothing appropriate came to his kind and anything that did didn't seem enough.

So he left. He gave a sharp nod and walked away in quick rapid shuffles, not noticing Dick's eyes hurt eyes following him or the fact that when he retreated, it was without the brownie.

~~~~~~~~~

Dick scratched his ankle, agitated and jumpy from the unfortunate nightmare he'd just had of being bounded down to a cold experimental table while his family ignored his cries and passed over him like he was invisible and inaudible. He could still feel the phantom binds and shackles around his wrists, ankles and chest. It might have been a while since they'd actually used those bonds on him but the memory was still fresh.

He pulled the blanket that Alfred had bought for him days ago tightly around himself, which had grown dusty from the dirty floor. Alfred had respected his wishes and had refrained from dropping by unexpectedly to clean the attic, though Dick could see his moustache wrinkle in disgust everytime he did come up at his scheduled time to administer shots. He knew Bruce and even Damian would be horrified with his living condition, which was kinda hypocritical of them if you asked him, seeing as they spent hours upon hours stationed at dirty rooftops and alleys.

He scratched harder at his ankle, hoping that the pain would erase the weird ghost like sensation of binds that didn't exist. He bent over his ankle, wondering if someone had somehow managed to slap a shackle on without him noticing when he heard it.

It was a weird sound, like a gentle hum and whizz at the same time and he lifted his head up, ignoring the _pop_ in his shoulder as he did so. He furrowed his brows and carefully edged towards the open latch, curious but wary. His dream had him on edge, the last thing he wanted was to be grabbed by a weird robot machine that his family had constructed to snag him without having to do so themselves. 

'Dick?' 

His eyes widened and he scrambled towards the open door, unable to squash the excitement that surged up in him. 

_'Barbie?'_

Barbara laughed softly, her silky red hair slipping from her shoulder and dipping behind her back and her eyes and glasses gleamed as the sunlight hit them.

'I can't believe you stuck with that nickname. Out of all the dumb names you boys have come up, this is the weirdest one.'

'Jay likes it.'

'Jason likes anything cringey and anything that could make me want to throw his stupid helmet at his.... sensitive areas.' 

Dick pulled a face, unable to stop the giggle that slipped by him at the reference. 'That's not subtle.' 

'I was just trying to stay children friendly. I might have all the bats fear me but I'm the one who's afraid of Alfred.' 

Dick smiled, glancing at the wheel chair as Barbara moved it forward a bit so that Dick wasn't craning his head to look at her. He frowned as the _whizzzz_ sounded through the hall and realisation hit him.

'Umm...how'd you get up here? You couldn't have driven up the stairs....' 

'Oh, wait till you see this.' she reached to her control board and flipped a new blue switch that hadn't been there before and Dick leant further out the latch, his arms straining as he hung halfway out of the attic door. The wheels slowly rotated until they were horizontal and Dick made an excited sound as the chair was lifted from the floor, hovering as if gravity never existed.

'How'd you do that?!?'

'Well, when these assh- _knuckleheads_ finally told me that you were boycotting the family and staying up here, I realised that if I wanted to see you I'd have to find a way to get up here to see you and I wasn't about to take up Jason's offer to be carried upstairs. So I spent those days putting some new changes to my chair so that it would be enough to carry me up the bajillion of stairs this place has.' she looked up at him and smiled kindly, as she inched closer to Dick's upside down form. 'Want to try it?' 

Dick's smile slipped like a slippery eel and he immediately pulled himself back inside the attic, pulling himself away from the entrance. 'No.' 

He wasn't getting out of the attic. It was his safe spot and if Barbara thought she could entice him with cutting edge technology, she was mistaken. 

The whizz died away and when Barbara spoke again, her voice was no longer chirpy but soberly gentle. 'Dick? It's okay if you don't want to come out and try it. You can try it anytime you want to.'

He narrowed his eyes, any excitement he'd felt at seeing her gone now. He shouldn't have been so hopeful, of course Barbara wouldn't be any different then the others, they were all in this together, they had to be after all- 

'I'm not trying to trick you or anything, kid. Just want to talk.'

'About what?'

'About you. I haven't seen you in a while I just wanted to check up on you. How are you?'

Dick poked his head out again, eyes narrowed and suspicious. 'Who's asking?'

'I am.' Barbara answered confidently and clearly, leaning back against her chair and pulling her glasses off to clean them in her chair. 'I'm asking as a friend. Your friend.'

'Can I really trust that you're not here to lure me out on my family's wishes?'

She held up her left hand and placed the other hand on her chest. 'Scouts honour.' 

He sighed, already feeling like a fool for trusting the bats again. Damn him and his soft heart.

'I'm lonely and bored.' 

'Well, I can entertain you for a while. At least until Jason wakes up and they need reinforcement.' 

'Reinforcement? For what?' 

'Nothing to worry about-'

'-I didn't say I was worried. I just asked for what.'

'Dick.'

'Barbie.' he mimicked easily, smiling sharply. 'Come on, Babs. I spent _weeks_ locked in the cave and contrary to popular believes, I didn't spend all my time watching cartoons and movies. The others left me alone when I was in a bad mood and I found my way around the computer. I saw the ugly stuff they didn't want me to see.'

'Oh?' Barbara raised her brow, her voice taking the careful tone it did when she was about to began an interrogation. 'What would that be?'

'Interrogations. Reports of brutal missions. Sparring videos. Files of the worst villains and archenemies. Videos from the medbays and cells when any of the family was hurt or under any kind of influence. So you don't need to coddle me or hide important stuff.'

Barbara watched him with a hawk like gaze, her blue eyes seeming to x-ray through him. She seemed to find what she wanted though because she leant forward to rest her elbows on her knee and place her chin on her interwined hands. '....Jason got injured badly on parole. The others think he might have accidentally gotten dosed with fear gas before he got injured. Believe me, an injured Jason is crabby enough, an injured Jason dosed with fear gas is going to be a nightmare.'

'Oh.' Dick felt his stomach twist, in a way that he wasn't able to decipher. 'Is....is that why he hasn't been up here since then?'

Barbara nodded kindly. 'I think we'll have to lock him up to stop him from stomping up here once he's conscious.' the joke fell flat when Dick flinched and she back paddled quickly. 'I'm sorry, shouldn't have made that joke.' Dick shrugged, an awkward air falling atop them and Barbara shifted before she tried to change the subject. 'How long has it been since you last saw him?'

'Uh, don't know.' he shrugged, trying to play nonchalant but at Barbara's unimpressed eyebrow raise, he conceded, '....four days. The last time he came up was go give me my blanket.'

'Well, it's not because he's avoiding you. Despite their emotional constipation, they're much better with you then they ever were with each other.'

He cocked his head in confusion, gripping the wood tighter when it caused him to lose his balance. 'Mm? What do you mean?'

'I mean that they're hard headed and clueless bobbleheads but they love you Dick. They're much nicer to you then they ever were to each other. They're more affectionate and more attentive and leaving you to stew up here is just not something they'd do. I can definitely see them doing it to each other....I mean, Damian once slipped down the stairs due to an injured leg and stayed knocked out on the floor for s  
two hours and all Jason and Tim did was step over him and continue on with their day.'

Dick snorted, a comical image of Damian laying star fished on Alfred's fancy carpet and Tim and Jason barely giving him a glance. 'They didn't even stop to take a picture?'

'Oh no, of course they did. About twenty at least. Framed it in the cave. Alfred actually yelled at them.' 

'They'd still do that though.'

'Not to you. If you'd fallen down the stairs knocked out, they'd blow them up and call every hospital in America. My point is.... they've changed for you, Dick. They're more open and they're not as stubborn or bossy as they can be with each other. Or as clueless as how to react to negative emotions as they usually would be.'

'That seems like a stretch. I know you don't want me to stay angry at them but you can't say they didn't make stupid choices....selfish choices.'

'No I can't. But I can defend them from the selfish claim. The bats are a lot of things but selfish isn't one of them. This whole _keeping secrets, lying, snooping around_ was a bad idea, I won't deny it. But they weren't done with the intention to hurt you and they're not hard headed enough for them to continue thinking they know what's for the best. They wouldn't have backed down before. You changed them Dick. Even before you were taken, you coming into the family bought everyone together. You made them _human.'_

_'.... How?'_

'Well to start, Jason got so much more softer with you. He started spending more time with the family and didn't get angry and stomp off at any hint of a problem or an argument. Tim started taking care of himself because he knew he couldn't force you to take care of yourself if he didn't do the same. And the time he spent hanging out with you or playing with you meant that he actually took a break from work. Damian grew more affectionate, more careful with his emotions and less brash with his words. Cass was already wonderful as it was but if you bought any improvement out of her, it was that she's not shy with offering hugs anymore, at least not when it comes to you. And Bruce..... he grew gentler and physically affectionate and more attentive. You made them better. You bought them together.' 

Dick looked away, a wall of hurt that he'd tried to ignore for _days_ clambering up around him, suffocating him as he bitterly bit out, 'Bruce hasn't come up to see me. Not even once.' 

Barbara sighed, in a way that made it clear that she was disappointed but not surprised. 'I said they're trying. I didn't say they were perfect Dick. They've made a million mistakes and that's not even counting the whole _lying, secrets and going behind your back_ kinda crap. But that's the difference between them and the court. There's was a mistake. They messed up but they didn't try to hurt you. Family's aren't perfect and this one isn't any different. But you're a family nonetheless. You made sure of that Dick. You bought everyone together, got them to let their grudges slide and forgo their issues. You made the family what it is, even _before_ the court came into the picture.' 

'I don't remember-' 

'-But you do remember all the time they spent with you before the treatment started. That wasn't fake.' 

He groaned and straightened himself up and stepped down on the door and settling on the third step. 'I...I know. But I'm not ready to be with them again. They've done too much-' 

'-and I'm not here to try to convince you. I'm just here to talk to you. And to remind you that even though family makes mistakes that doesn't mean they don't love you. No pressure to come down though.' she leant back and unzipped her jacket, pulling it off and laying it delicately on her lap. 'And I also came up here to ask you what you thought about the new scooby doo movie?' 

'Um....I haven't seen it.' 

'Well, you're in luck.' she reached into her wheel chair pocket on her side and pulling out some stuff. 'I bought a usb with the movie and a portable movie player. Want to watch it? I can have Tim bring us popcorn.' 

At Dick's hesitation, she gently added, 'He doesn't have to join us. I told you Dick, they're going to give you space to the best of their limits, for how ever long you need. I'll leave you alone too if you want to?' 

Dick looked between Barbara and the open screen of the portable player, somewhat missing the huge Batcomputer screen and the 32 inches TV screen in the lounge. He hadn't really _talked talked_ to anyone for a while. He hadn't hung out with anyone for weeks without the threat of being drugged or tied up, or the fear that they were just stalling till someone came by and dropped more bad news. It seemed like a nice change, a difference he hadn't thought he wanted. 

He shook his head, leaning somewhat comfortably against the railing and smiling at his pseudo sister. 'I missed hanging out with you Barbie.' 

Barbara's tinkling laugh lifted his spirits more then he'd thought they would. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is now canon that Dick calls Barbara both Babs and barbie and throws paper balls at Damian when he is frustrated. You can't change my mind. 
> 
> Took the longest time working on this....I hope it was worth it. Is anyone really surprised that Bruce fucked up here and has distanced himself? Probably not. Does it still hurt. Yups.
> 
> I won't bore you with a long note. Just a happy new year, please continue to stay safe and healthy and thank you so much for reading :-) 
> 
> Till next time


	16. Sincere apologies

Bruce propped his briefcase on his desk, loosening his tie and pretending not to notice his second eldest and a certain red head glaring daggers at him.

He massaged the pinching headache which was thrumming in his head, as if a low beat was playing in his head, the kinda music which played in the club that Brucie wayne attended.

'Ignoring us won't us go away.'

'One can hope.' he replied, too tired to keep up pleasentries with his son and his pseudo daughter. 'What's wrong?' 

'It's about Dick.' 

Immediately, Bruce was on edge, shoulders tense and headache gone, his focus driven towards his youngest son who was still hiding up in his attic. 'What is it? Is he hurt? Is the serum messing with him? Is-'

'Breathe.' Tim interrupted, his gaze hard but his tone somewhat amused. 'Won't do to give yourself an aneurysm before you can actually help him.'

He forced himself to subtly take in a few deep breaths, calming his beating heart. Leslie had been nagging him for months now to pause any and all vigilante activities and to build up his heart strength again, though Bruce was fairly certain that was impossible. Besides, he didn't know how to explain to her that most of his heart attacks came from worry of his children's wellbeing and their antics.

Such as hiding in the dark.

'What is it then?' 

'Unfortunately I have no clue. Babs just demanded I joined her and glared you down. I'm just here for moral support for whatever it is.' 

'I can deal with this, Tim.' Barbara piped up, her body relaxed in her wheelchair but her gaze sharp. Bruce observed her in the same hawk fashion, suspicious of her overly sweet tone. 'You can leave.'

'Wait, did you seriously just drag me away from my work to sit in the dark for forty minutes to play a thirty second glaring role and shooing me away without giving me any tea?'

Bruce raised a brow, confused where the hot beverage craving had come from. 'You can get tea from Alfred...'

Tim glanced at him and raised an amused brow as he chuckled, much to Bruce's confusion. 'What?'

'Nothing B. I'll explain the slang after Barbara's done chewing you out....on whatever it is she has to chew you out on.' he stood up, his knees popping loudly as he did so. 'See you guys. Good luck B. I'm heading to my office.'

Bruce pulled his tie off completely, rolling it up neatly and propping it between the few mugs he had on his desk. 'What is this about Barbara? I have work to do.' 

'How about some gratitude? The only reason I sent Tim out of here _and_ checked to make sure he didn't place any bugs. I didn't want _two_ of your sons upset at you. Or rather three, Jason is usually mad at you.' 

'Who's the other one? Damian?' he tried to think of what he could have done exactly to piss his third son off but Damian was usually pissed. It really wouldn't take much to anger him.

Barbara looked unimpressed, almost angry. 'It was that easy for you to forget about Dick?' 

'Forget?' He repeated, half incredulous, half annoyed. 'Get to your point, Barbara. If there's something wrong with Dick, please just tell me so I can-'

'-so you can what? Send someone else up to deal with the mess and continue brooding in the cave and ignoring him?' 

He sighed and turned to his chair, pulling it out and plopping down on it as gracefully as he could, head leaning against the back as he stared at the roof. He didn't try to deny Barbara's accusations or jabs, knowing that nothing he would say would be well recieved. 'This is....not your buisness, Barbara.'

'It damn well is.' She let unshielded anger slip in to her tone now, the one Bruce had grown accustomed to hearing from her. 'Why haven't you visited him? It's not fair that I've visited your son more than you have _and_ I have the extra burden of climbing 76 stairs on a wheelchair and being uninformed of the new changes in the house.' 

'I don't need to visit him, he _lives_ in my house.'

'Are you sulking? You can't keep a watch on his every move so now you'll shut him out? Or are you upset because your plan went overboard and you feel guilty over how miserable he became?'

'I have no clue what plan you're talking about.'

'Are we really going to play the clueless charade with me? The others might have somehow placed their faith in you and your intentions but I can't imagine you were dense enough not to notice how miserable and sheltered Dick was becoming. Bruce-' he didn't need to look to know Barbara had rolled her wheelchair closer to him. '-Bruce, look at me.' 

He sighed and did as he was asked, staring into the emerald eyes of his oldest protege and raised a brow at her. 'Tell me this wasn't your plan. I'm begging you to tell me that you didn't purposely neglect him just so he would....become whatever he had to become.' 

'I might be tough but I'm not an abuser. This wasn't part of my plan.'

'Maybe it wasn't your intention for it to go this far, but I cannot imagine that you did not notice the toll it was taking on him.'

He could deny it, it wouldn't be the first time he'd lied to his proteges. And this would be so much easier to lie about, knowing how badly received it would be by everyone, yet he found himself saying, 'It was for his own good.' 

'Oh god.' she leant back in her wheelchair, rubbing her fingers roughly through her tangled hair. 'Explain, Bruce. Before I borrow one of Jason's gun and use it on you.'

'What is there to explain?'

 _'Everything!_ Do I really have to explain to you again that you can't just keep sparing their mental health for their actual health.'

'Like I said Barbara, I'm not an abuser. Yes, I was somewhat aware that Dick was not doing the best but my only mistake was assuming those issues were trivial and that he would be able to overcome those based on his past. I didn't....I knew he wasn't handling everything well, I just didn't pay enough attention to just how _badly_ he was handling it or I would have stepped in.'

Barbara searched his face, trying to pick any ingenuity but coming up short. Bruce sighed, upset at the suspicion but not surprised by it. 'I'm not a monster, Barbara. I do have his best interest at heart. I didn't start this treatment with the intention to break him and build him back up the way I want him to be. He's my son, not an experiment.' 

'Then tell me honestly that this is not a part of your treatment.'

'How exactly would it fit in to his treatment?'

'Dick's growing physically healthier and he was definitely growing emotionally healthy but not independent. Not like he used to be. But this whole ordeal has given him a voice like he never had before. He defies you and openly rejects ideas and practices he does not agree with and he finally believes he has his own rights and deserves control over his own life. This treatment might have been exhausting for him but it was good for him in the long term. _It was for his own good.'_

'I know what you're initiating Barbara. And I understand that my previous decisions and actions with my other children would make you suspicious. But a man _does_ eventually learn from his mistakes. And I learnt from mine. I won't deny Dick has grown more confident in his own skin and I'm not shy to admit that I do take a bit of pride in that. But I did not neglect his emotional needs to gain a quick path to his improvement.' 

'Fine. I'm relieved that you're not being an idiot in that prospect. In other areas though-'

'-if this is about me not seeing Dick while he's locked up stairs-'

'-of course this is about that! Why have you not been up?'

'I have my reasons.'

'Let me guess. Your guilt and emotional wall has took over you and you have decided for yourself that you should maintain your distance and let the others comfort him till he decides to forgive you himself without you having to come forward and actually work for it?'

'If Dick wanted my attention or company, he would not have barred himself up in the attic and barred himself away from the family.'

'He's ten Bruce. You cannot expect him to cross the emotional distance. He's still learning the reins of how this whole family thing works and lately, you've actually done a good job of not being distant and you _have_ been there for him. You can't just flip from that to avoiding him and expect him to be the bigger person and reach out to you first.' 

'Barbara-'

'-I don't want to hear any other excuse which you've no doubt been coming up with for days. There is no excuse good enough to excuse the fact that I've seen more of him then you have. And there is no excuse you can give me that justifies the sad boy upstairs who's confused and feeling insecure because his father won't spare him a glance because he didn't agree with his actions. As I recall, any time you distanced yourself after any of the rest of the batch did something you didn't agree with, they were under the impression that it was due to disappointment and not your care for them.'

A sharp kick was delivered to his shin, where he was already sporting a pretty deep cut. He gritted his teeth and lifted his head to glare at his oldest apprentice. 'I clearly messed up by not spotting the problems that were arising and I'm paying for the consequences. I don't want to hurt Dick anymore then I already am.'

'In other and _better_ words, _I care about you so much that my failures scared me and I just want you to be safe and happy and I'm afraid that I might do just the opposite, which is why I have been keeping my distance and for that I deeply apologise._ If that's how you feel, you should tell him that. Fix it and stop expecting others to fix it for you.' 

'It is not that easy.' 

'I never said it would be. When you chose to be a parent, you chose to bear with them in their hardest and most frustrating moments and that doesn't mean supporting them from the sides. I know you would step in and ruin anyone who so much as looks at your kid in the wrong way and would move mountains to keep him safe, but that's not enough for you to do. Your kids need to know you would do all those things for them, not just have you silently do them and move back to brooding. So get your self up there and talk to your kid.' 

'It's not that easy.' he repeated stubbornly.

'Fine. I'm not going to shame you for being on edge though I must admit, I am surprised that this is how you reacted. The last time Dick had a fight with you all and stormed off to hide in his room and then disappeared, he'd run off to cool his mind and had gotten snatched by the court.' 

'This is not the same.' Bruce snapped, letting some of the anger he felt slip into his tone. 'He's upstairs and safe and he's not leaving the house without putting up a fight. The security system is updated and by the time he manages to get even a mile close to the front gate, we'll be able to stop him.'

'Treating him like a prisoner does not gurantee his safety Bruce. It should have been impossible to leave that night too, but he did. And I think the whole reason you got into this mess is because you weren't truthful with him and treated him like a criminal that needed to be locked up during the treatment. The fact that Dick managed to slip away from you all from the cave should have been next to impossible too but he did that. I think it's time you give him credit for his sneaking skills.' 

'He's not getting out of the manor.' Bruce deflected stubbornly, feeling a bit like a child who was stuck on getting what he wanted.

'Well, he's not coming down from the attic any time soon either. So you can either continue tiptoeing around your own house and brooding or you can go up and remind your son how much you care for him and love him because he's clearly uncertain where he lies in your life currently.'

Bruce wanted very much to slouch in his chair and sulk but that would probably hit a little too close to how his children acted and he _was_ suppose to be the parent. 'I do not want to impose. If he wants me-'

 _'-he'll come get you.'_ Barbara finished for him, her tone monotone in a way that suggested that she was tired of hearing this excuse. 'Everytime you've used that idea, it's backfired. It didn't work out well with your grown up sons, it won't work on your ten year old. Now please stop trying to make the conversation go around in circles before I unleash the final hell and bring Alfred in to knock some sense into you. You'd think all the burnt food he's been serving you would have been a hint enough for how upset he was.'

He had noticed. He'd just been too dissociated to acknowledge it. 

'He'll appreciate Possy being bought to him.' 

Bruce raised a brow, wondering if that was a new word his kids had come up, so as to convertly curse in front of Alfred and children or if it was yet another new slang the teens and young adults today had come up with. 'Possy?'

'His stuffed octopus. The one Tim bought for him from your buisness trip. It's his favourite plushie right now.' 

'And he asked for it?'

'Not really but it would probably make him feel a little better. And someone needs to take it up to him and as Cass and Jason are confined to the cave and Tim and Damian are off doing their own thing and I'm confined to a wheelchair, it seems as if _you_ are the only one who can take it to him. Oh and look here-' Bruce watched as she rolled her wheelchair to a stray arm chair on the far left and picked up a large orange octopus with blue eyes and a bright smile that was eerily similar to Dick's. '-it's sitting right here. And it looks so out of place in the nice study and-'

'Alright alright.' Bruce interrupted, striding to the redhead and took the slight dirty toy in his hands. 'You can stop blabbering, you don't have to convince me.' 

Barbara gave him a dubious look and glanced away, muttering something under her breath that sounded a lot like, _could've fooled me._ Bruce decided to ignore the remark, partially because he knew he deserved it and partially because he was feeling somewhat anxious at having to face yet another son he had failed. 

'Go downstairs to the cave, please. If Jason wakes up, you have the best chance of keeping him calm.'

'Yes Bruce, of course I'll clean up your mess.' Barbara cheerily replied, whizzing away before he can reply. Bruce resisted the urge to faceplant his head against the plush octopus. 

He stood there for a while, clutching the toy so hard that when he finally removed his fingers, tiny dents had formed into the skin. The house was quiet, in a way that Bruce had came to loathe. It hadn't been this quiet since Dick's abduction, the inhabitants either staying away from the manor to find any clues they could or subdued from injuries they had acquired from picking up fights to distract themselves. 

He had spent weeks loathing the silence and doing everything he can to bring the easiness and happiness that had surged through the hallways whenever Dick was around. He couldn't disregard all that now. Barbara was right, he had been avoiding confronting the boy partly because of how familiar all this had felt and that wasn't smart.

If he really wanted to avoid a repeat, he needed to step up and push himself out of his comfort zone. And that meant confronting his son, accepting and apologising for his mistakes and....well, _grovelling._

He could do it. He was batman. He'd done worse.

Pulling his jacket off and discarding it over the chair, he forced himself out of the room and started his journey to the attic, making sure to keep his mind blank so that he wouldn't overthink and back down.

A train of emotions crashed through him as the attic came into view and he spotted an assortment of paper balls gathered beneath the open latch door. As he stepped closer, he heard soft humming coming from above and the pittar patter of feet skipping around. 

It was the lightest he'd heard Dick sound for....a long time. He almost wanted to turn around and walk away before he ruined it like he usually di-

'Alfie?' before Bruce could react, a head popped out from the attic door, Dick's wide eyes growing even wider when he spotted Bruce. 'B?'

Words failed him, his tongue sticking to the roof of his mouth as he stared at his son, taking in the long black hair flopping over slightly chubby cheeks and bright blue eyes that Bruce had missed so _so_ much. His fingers twitched against the plush toy as he restrained himself from reaching out and running them through the child's hair. 

Dick cocked his head, gripping the wooden edge tighter as he looked at his father in confusion. 'Umm...B?'

Bruce forced himself to snap out of his trance, forcing his lump like arms up to hold the toy up to the boy as a way of explaination. Dick furrowed his brows, before reaching out tentatively to take the offered toy, holding it out in front of him and suspiciously shaking it. 'What's in it?'

Bruce blinked, taken aback by the absurd question. 'I'm assuming soft cotton balls...' he answered slowly, wondering if Dick was setting him up for a joke.

Dick however, only narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously. 'No. I mean, what did you put in it?'

Genuinely confused, Bruce stepped closer but stopped when Dick immediately shuffled back, still holding the arm clutching the toy away from him. 'Nothing? Why?'

'Why'd you bring this up?'

'Barbara said you would like to have it near you.' he answered automatically, deciding not to dwell on how Dick was rightfully questioning his integrity. 

Dick's tense shoulders lowered and he slowly drew the octopus to himself, tucking it under his chin as he sadly looked at Bruce. 'So that's the only reason you came up here?' 

Bruce pursed his lips, not liking the flair of guilt which surged inside him and left him unable to word his true feelings....as usual. 

Dick seemed to take his silence as an answer and he looked away, clutching his plushie so close to his chest that Bruce thought it might burst. 'Okay then. Thanks for bringing Possy up.' 

He began to retreat and Bruce panicked, not willing to let the boy slip out of his sight again. 'Dick.'

Blue eyes were the only part of Dick's face that was visible to him now but it was a clear indication that he had his attention. Bruce gazed at them, taking in the sharp glint of yellow in his pupils as he braced himself, gathering his strength to say, 'I'm sorry chum.' 

Dick squinted his eyes and Bruce heard the shuffling of his feet against the wooden roof as he pushed himself forward. 'What for?'

Where to even begin? He was sorry for not doing a more detailed check when he'd first taken in Dick and then not protecting him well enough when he finally had the boy in his care. He was sorry that he'd let the court take his boy from him and torn him apart and that it had taken him so _long_ to get him back. He was sorry that he couldn't come up with a better treatment for the boy, one that didn't hurt him in so many ways. 

He doubted Dick would want to hear that right now though. Dick wasn't mad about that, he held no grudges against his family for his abduction and torture. The only grudge Dick held against them was for their secrets and neglect.

Bruce took in a deep breath, forcing his voice to settle into a calm montone manner as he began the apology that he'd ran in his head for days now. 'I shouldn't have neglected your feelings so easily Dick. I....never meant to hurt you. None of us did-'

'-I know.' Dick interrupted, pushing himself a little further out so that his shoulders were leaning over the roof too. Bruce could see the top of his wings now, tufts of blood red and bright golden feathers beginning to grow in patches. 'Everyone's apologised for that and explained it to me a billion times by now. And I've forgiven them- _you._ The thing I _am_ mad about is how when things didn't work out the way everyone wanted them to be, they forgot I exist. I only see Alfred now.' 

Bruce could feel the courage he'd summon up disappear. 'It is not on purpose...'

'Only Jason and Cass are not avoiding me on purpose. Tim and Damian are staying away since our last interaction and I know I said I needed space but I didn't mean to just forget I existed. And you...' he spat the last word out spitefully, clutching the toy harder. '...you haven't even looked at me for weeks, even before I ran away.' 

'Dick...'

'Can I just ask you something? Do you regret saving me?'

'Wha- No! Of course I don't Dick. Not even for a second, pup.'

'Then _why_ have you completely discarded me? Why would you not talk or hang out with me while I was in the cave? Why did you stop acknowledging me when I...ran away?' 

_Because it's what I do, even though I never mean to!_ Bruce thought despairingly, shaking his head as he tried to clear his head and force himself to explain his feelings rather than shut off. 'I...we thought we were doing what you wanted. Obviously we didn't handle it very well. And I- I didn't want to upset you by imposing myself. I thought it would be best to give you space after you practically locked yourself up in our attic.' 

'I just...I just wanted some space, I wanted to see if I could actually trust you. I didn't want you to just cut me out of your life bu-' tears pooled in his eyes and slid to his nose, dropping from the tip on to the carpeted floor. Bruce felt his heart drop to his stomach and he reached up before he could stop himself, faltering when Dick backed away for a second. He should- _no, no_ he wasn't going to be a coward now, not when it hurt Dick so much already. He stood on his tiptoes and craddled his youngest's cheek, swiping a thumb over the wet skin. 

'I made a mistake. A huge one. I should have known that solitary would not be welcomed on your behalf and I should have learnt from my past mistakes that distancing myself would make everything better. But no matter what choices you make or how you act, you....I shall always love you. Your my son, no matter what.'

Dick pulled his toy to his face, hiding it in the soft fur and sighing softly when his father's hand fell away. Bruce pulled away but he made himself continue, 'I just want to assure you that I...I did not enjoy or enforce any of the precautions we used to make our lives easier. It hurt to see you cry and in pain and no apologies can make up for how much we've hurt you. My biggest mistake was not prioritising your mental health as much as I prioritised your physical health. And I will give you as much space as you need, Dick. I'm not going to ask you to come down or to let me visit you more often, but I'll keep....doing everything I can to...to make you feel safe.'

'I...I can't promise that I'll talk to you everytime you visit but I do _want_ you to visit. It's... it's lonely up here and even if I didn't like being stuck in the cave, at least I wasn't alone. I don't like being alone.'

'I know.' Bruce nodded, his heart aching. Alfred would shoot him if he wasnt above such violence. _Of course_ Dick was not going to be okay with being alone after the court and _of course_ he shouldn't have taken a child's declaration of wanting to be left alone so close to heart. He thought he'd been doing the right thing by adhering to Dick's wishes, seeing as he was upset that they hadn't listened to him before but Dick was ten....and a ten year old with multiple issues, including seperation anxiety and abondonment issues. He shouldn't have left Dick alone for so long or should have at the very least sat at the bottom of the stairs in silence to show his solitudanal support to the boy.

Though....he hadn't _exactly_ stayed away....

'No one left you alone.' he spoke up, avoiding Dick's eye and instead choosing to stare at a speck of dust on the highest step. 'We were always here, but we stayed just far enough that you wouldn't get upset. Tim and Damian take regular hikes up the stairs to make sure you're okay. Cassandra has snuck upstairs without us being able to catch her a few times. She usually snuck out while we were on parole and while you were sleeping.' 

'....and you?'

'....I was there the day you told Damian that you didn't want any of us around during the storm. I stayed at the other end of the hallway. I....I stayed till 4 am.' 

Until the storm had died down. Until Dick's panicked whimpers and sobs had died down in to calm deep breaths that had told Bruce he was asleep and that he could relax now.

Dick stared at him incredulously, pushing himself even further so that his chest was now exposed to and Bruce had to stuff his hands in his pockets to stop himself from grabbing the boy and push him back so that he wouldn't fall. 'But...I didn't hear you. I always hear everyone and anyone.'

'You were....distraught. You were too preoccupied. I'm assuming that's the only reason you weren't aware. But that doesn't matter now. The only thing that matters is that I'm here now and you can....stay up here as long as you want.' 

Dick carefully pulled his wings up and let them drop over the edge of the corner, letting Bruce get a clear view of their state. They were....much better then the last time he had seen them. They had tufts of feathers sprawled over them, ranging from blood red, bright good and some deep black ones settling in a pattern. They were brighter then the wings the court had given him, which had been bronze and deep Scarlett. The new wings fit the boy better.

With any luck, they'd be able to start lowering the dosage soon enough from thrice a day to once a day.

'I-I'm still mad at you. I haven't forgiven you. I don't want to come downstairs yet.'

'I understand. And I'm not forcing you to do anything you don't want to do. Buy if I may....I don't feel comfortable with you sleeping on just a blanket and a pillow. Just....let me bring a mattress up to you, so that you don't sleep in a curled up ball on the dirty floor.'

Dick cocked his head, glancing behind him and then back at his father. 'Can I have another pillow?'

'Of course, chum.'

'You're all really weird, you know that? You're all so bad with emotions and-' he paused, furrowing his brow and scrunching his nose in a way he did when he was listening hard. 'Do you hear something?'

Bruce was immediately on alert, narrowing his eyes at the heavy _thumps_ and tensing his shoulders at any possible threats. The only people in the house right now were confined to the cave due to their injuries and Barbara's wheelchair wouldn't make that kind of sound. He gestured at Dick to get back as he inched towards the stairs, ready to throw his fake persona of harmless Brucie Wayne out the window to protect his son from further harm-

-he blinked in surprise when he saw who was hobbling up the stairs, hair touselled and deep purple bags beneath his eyes. 'Jason?'

The younger man paused only for a second before sighing in defeat and lifting one arm, glaring at him when Bruce stared back in surprise. 'Either help me up or push me downstairs old man. I'm not going to lounge around this stair forever.' 

Bruce edged towards his oldest, raking his eyes over his son and taking in the green of his eyes warily. 'You shouldn't be up here.'

'If your concern is my injuries, I've dragged myself down alley ways with both my ankles broken and my legs impaled. If your concern is that I might be lost in a haze of lazarus pit insanity, I've been given the all clear by Alfred and my head is completely clear. Although, if I'm left standing on this stair any longer, you might have a crutch shoved in your eye.' 

Bruce looked back at the hallway and then at his eldest, afraid that Jason might accidentally lash out at Dick. It wouldn't be the first time Jason had done so, and he'd much rather avoid the mess altogether-

'-Fine, fuck you I'll just climb up myself.' Jason grumbled, side stepping Bruce and hobbling up faster then he could have imagined any one doing so on crutches. By the time he'd managed to snap himself out of his shock, Jason was on the top step. 

Bruce began his journey back up and had only gotten to the third step when he heard a delighted, _'Jay!'_

Jason stumbled back and Bruce rushed forward to support him from behind as Dick crashed into him, wrapping his arms and legs around his oldest brother. Bruce stepped back, surprised at the speed Dick had jumped from his hiding spot and had thrown himself at his brother. 

Jason winced in pain, but covered it up with a gruff chuckle as he let go of his crutches to drop on to the ground and hugged the child back. 'You missed me, huh?'

'Uh-huh.'

'You smell really bad though.'

'Shut up.' Dick groaned into Jason's shoulder, hugging him tighter for a milli second before pulling away and jumping to his feet and rushing back up to the attic, leaving both son and father blinking at the empty space in front of him. Dick poked his head back out, hanging upside down as he peered at his brother, his eyes alight. 'How are you feeling?' 

Jason groaned and held his arm out to Bruce, shaking it impatiently in a way that clearly said, 'Get over yourself and hurry up.' 

Bruce helped him to his feet and placed his hand behind his back, taking it as a victory that it wasn't shaken off as he helped him hobble over to Dick, stepping away to lean against a bleacher as Jason settled on a chair and leant back to chat with his brother.

Bruce felt his heart twist but not in a bad way. He was....overjoyed.

When he'd adopted Dick, he hadn't counted on Jason forming any sort of bond with the child. After all, Jason had loathed Tim with a vengeance and had even tried to kill him a few times though Tim had forgiven him quite easily, even before Jason had formally apologised. When he'd mellowed out, Jason had avoided the manor like a plague, only getting slightly involved when Cass had became a part of the family. He'd begrudgingly took on the role of big brother, softened by the child who had gone through abuse and neglect, much like himself. Damian had drawn him closer, Jason managing to somewhat understand the child and what he'd been through better then anyone else and Damian had, in return, welcomed Jason's rough exterior and personality better then he'd welcome the rest of the family. They had managed to bond over their time in the league and their differing ideologies. 

But it had been Dick who had really drawn Jason into the family. Jason had not visited the manor for three weeks when Dick had first came to live with them, seemingly indifferent to the new addition. Bruce wasn't sure when exactly the two had started bonding but Dick had always seemed to adore Jason, seeing him as the cool aloof big brother. One minute, Jason was indifferent to the youngest and the next, he was begrudgingly shielding him so as to protect him from multiple hungry reporters and snidey guests at the annual Wayne gala. Dick had taken the small gesture (on Jason's part) as an open invitation to bond and had grown attached to his hip, following him around the whole house and forcing Jason to care for him and accept him as his baby brother.

His disappearance had made Jason more protective of him and had turned him from stand offish to more open. Jason would have checked in regularly before but to actually climb up dozens of stairs with extreme injuries just to see his upset little brother and had even endured a hug.

Dick's eyes were alight in a way that Bruce was not sure had happened with the rest of the family. 

Jason had changed for Dick and it was clear he valued his baby brother more then anything. Just as much as Dick clearly adored him and cared for him, had calmed him down in a way the rest hadn't been.

Bruce smiled softly before turning away and leaving his oldest and youngest alone, going to the numerous guest rooms to find a mattress small enough to fit through the attic door. Dick clearly hadn't forgiven them, wouldn't forgive them for a while but they were getting there. Dick didn't hold a grudge and while he was still mad at them, he would eventually forgive them. Till then, they would just have to be patient and keep working to gain his forgiveness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go, Bruce is no longer an asshole. An emotionally constipated idiot, but at least he's not an asshole. 
> 
> Time period, it's been 13 days since Dick's been hiding out in the attic and his hiding time is coming to an end because I keep stretching the story out. I mean I don't know if you've noticed, but this story was only suppose to be 10 chapters long which transcended to 15 then 18 then 22 and I have no intention of dragging it on longer.
> 
> All hail Queen Barbara and her bluntness. My girl doesn't get appreciated enough for the shit she has to deal with by working with idiots who don't know how to express themselves.
> 
> I hope you guys liked it! Dick still hadn't forgiven the family but unfortunately, he is more forgiving then people deserve according to comics and tv and all. It is why I made his excitement and relief to see Jason walking around again overpower his anger and why he left his hiding spot for the first time in weeks to hug him. Dick still hasn't forgiven them but he's getting there but this experience has changed him and he's grown more the the family realises. They will soon though.
> 
> Stick around till the next chapter lovelies :-))) thank you for all the support and do let me know how you liked this chapter :-) <3


	17. A new journey

The past few days had been....good.

Dick couldn't really believe it. It seemed like bursting out at Bruce had resulted in some kind of domino effect. The whole family, including Damian and Tim, had slowly started migrating back to him, perching on the dusty step of the attic and chattering with him. The first few days had been awkward, including tense silences and feet shuffles as his family tried to work their way back in to his heart.

It had gotten better and Dick had eventually extended an olive branch to them, working on rebuilding the torn bridges between them. His family's attempts to make him as comfortable as possible had actually worked. They'd started bringing up his belongings upstairs, stuffing them into the attic and eventually extending his hoardings to the hallway when it eventually got full.

Tim had even found ways to continue Dick's favourite hobbies with him without forcing the child to trudge downstairs. He'd bought portable gameboys and movie players, downloading multiple movies and video games to play with Dick. 

The rest had followed suit. Damian would bring up newspapers and solve crosswords and word search with him, even though Dick knew that the older could solve it in his sleep. Jay had made Dick practice art therapy again and had bought ping pong rackets and balls to play on the floor. Cass would visit him with Steph, the trio spending the time delving into makeups and hair styles and nerf and water gun fights. Bruce would usually check in and shake his head in dismay at the abundance of mess growing in his hallway but didn't comment on it, instead settling down next to Dick to talk about his day and feed him.

It was nice. But then....they left. They always left. And Dick would watch them mount their bikes and step in to their cars and leave to explore the outer world. Something which Dick was still unable to do.

The attic had been a good refuge. But it had slowly grown suffocating. Dick had been more than okay with sticking to one room when he had first came back into the Manor. After all, the only private place he had to himself in the court was his coffin. Compared to that, hiding in his room and attics and bathroom had seemed like a mansion in itself. But he'd evolved since then. He craved freedom, more than he'd gotten. It was why he had gotten so interested in exploring the manor and spending more times in the garden and forest behind the manor. And for a while it had been.

But then he'd selfishly wanted more. He wanted to go _beyond_ the black iron gates that kept him caged in the manor, just like his family. He loved and adored them all and he was so grateful to have them in his life but they were all he had. He had no one to turn to when his family was being infuriating, which since the rosegold glasses had been removed, he realised was quite common. When Jason was mad at his family, he disappeared and spent time with the outlaws and Barbara and the rest did the same with their respective partners and friends. Even Bruce had other people to turn to when he didn't have any patience to deal with his kids anymore.

Dick had no one. Sure, he was on good terms with all his family's friends and partners and they tended to spoil him quite a lot but he would never go to them with his own medicare problems. He wouldn't exactly tell Bruce that he found the character on Tim's favourite show cute, it just wasn't appropriate.

And then there were the small pleasures that the others had that they didn't even view as blessings, like going out to get pizza because they felt like it and walking around the streets because the weather was good and wanted to clear their heads. 

Dick wanted that. He wanted it so bad. He wanted to go to school like his siblings and complain about the heat and disgusting food in the cafeteria. He wanted to call Alfred and inform him he won't be eating at home because his friend's mother had asked him to stay for dinner. He wanted to win a giant stuffed teddy for _himself_ at the mall arcade, instead of Stephanie bringing him one back whenever she went on a date.

The attic had served as a good hideout the first few days when he'd escaped the cave but soon it had grown revoltingly claustrophobic. It was why he'd slowly ventured out into the hallway, skipping around the carpeted floor and entertaining himself and only skiddering up to the attic when he was in a bad mood or wanted to sleep. But the large hallway was still not enough and he found himself missing the rest of the house but he wasn't really ready to go down there himself. And everyday brought on new urges to go out and _explore._

Funny what being locked in the cave for 50 days would do to his adventurous side.

Which was why being trapped in the attic right now after so long was upsetting him even more than usual. He wanted nothing more than to push himself up from the dusty floor and slide out the door and out of the stuffy attic. Or at least crawl himself in to the mattress so he could be more comfortable.

But his limbs felt so heavy. It was taking everything he had to stay on all fours, breathing harshly and sweat forming over his skin and making him feel gross. 

He didn't really know what was happening. He hadn't been feeling top tier for a _long_ time but the past 3 days had led him to slowly feeling more and more exhausted and run down and today, it had taken him twenty minutes just to pull himself out of bed only to regret it as soon as he'd left because he felt as if his organs had been laid on the road and continuously ran over. Something was twisting in his stomach and something else was lodged into his throat and he had never really felt _this_ type of pain.

Dick took in a few more deep breaths, his arms shaking and wishing his father or _someone_ was up here because he could really use a hug or a back rub right now-

He gagged and threw up, pushing himself away from the bile and pressing his chest to his knees and lifting his wings as high as he could so as to not let them dip into the foul smelling vomit.

His throat burned viciously as he continued to throw up on to the wooden floor, the thought of how the smell would stick to the cramped room fleeting through his mind and becoming lost admist the more concerning thoughts of _pain_ and fear because _why the hell was he feeling like this-?_

Dick couldn't remember the last time he had thrown up. Ever. He guessed he had the court to thank for that and it was making everything so much scarier because this was the first time he was actually _sick_ and-

-and he wanted his dad. So badly. Dad made everything better, he made Dick feel _safe_ and he was so tired of feeling scared and weak.

He dry heaves a few times, his stomach churning painfully and he sluggishly scrambled away from the mess so that he wouldn't face plant into his own puke. He collapsed in to a shivering ball on the other side of the attic, pressing his hot cheek against the cold floor and closing his eyes as he attempted to make the room stop spinning.

He cautiously spread his sings behind him and attempted to ignore how it caused waves of pain to roll over him. Everything felt so bad.

He wanted to get out of the dark and smelly room and go downstairs, and call for his family so that they could offer him comfort and fix it. Fix him.

But he had no energy. All he could do was lie there and hope he doesn't end up dying in his own filth and that someone would come up to visit him and help him.

Though, everytime he hid in the attic, it meant that he was upset and wanted to be left alone which his family obediently obliged to. If he didn't come out for too long, they would call out to him but would leave when he wouldn't reply because he didn't think he could reply because his jaw felt like it was dislodged. 

They would eventually get concerned about his silence and absence and would force themselves up to check on him and by that time it might be too late-

He took in a shaky breath and closed his eyes, not having noticed that they had opened because he really couldn't see anything. He was....exhausted.

He let his eyes slip shut and fell asleep.

When he gained consciousness, the attic was submerged in darkness and it smelled _terrible._

He still couldn't make himself get up. His limbs felt even heavier than they had before he'd fallen asleep and he was under the spell of sleep before he could even try to open his mouth and call for help.

When he awoke again, he burst in to tears. He'd been lying on the dirty floor for god knows how long and he was so exhausted and he was still hurting-

-'Jay-' he moaned tiredly, the tears clumping his lashes together and his eyes burning from all the crying. 'Jay, please-'

They didn't have enhanced hearing like he did. He doubted they'd be able to hear his pained whispers even if they were standing right near the foot of the attic. 

He couldn't help continuing to call for his family though. He felt useless and helpless and he just wanted to be okay again. 'Alfie....B-'

He passed out again while calling Damian's name.

He awoke to rough colloused hands over his cheeks and urgent slaps. 

'-id? Dick, wake up! Jesus chri-' the frustated yells were cut off when Dick groaned loudly, blinking tiredly up at the pale face illuminated by the single bulb hanging from the roof. Tim sighed in relief, his hands fluttering to Dick's arms and lifting him up to settle him against the wall, eventually just pulling him into his lap when the child kept lilting to the side.

'You scared me. Are you with me now?'

Dick moaned in response and turned his head to press his forehead to his brother's cheek, wrinkling his nose at his bad breath and how fuzzy his tongue felt. 

Tim flinched away and carefully cupped the back of Dick's head and the child sighed in relief at how _good_ it felt. 

'You're burning.' he glanced around the room, slipping his hand to rest over Dick's heart. 'Have you ever thrown up before?'

'N-no.'

'Okay. Okay, that's okay. What else is wrong? Do you feel light headed? Are you experiencing fatigue?'

'Yes.'

'Yes to what?'

'Bo-' Dick turned his head away to cough loudly, something dirty and disgusting slipping last his lips and splattering on to the wooden floor. 'Ugh. Both.'

'Fuck.' Tim cursed loudly, gathering Dick more securely in to his arms and clambering to his feet. 'Fuck, fuck, fuck-'

'-Tim?'

His brother was climbing down the stairs and while it was a relief not to be overwhelmed by the disgusting smell of his own puke, his heart sped up at leaving his safe space.

'It's okay.... everything's going to be okay, bud. We just....need to get a sample of your blood. We'll....we'll fix whatever's wrong.' 

'I-' he hiked himself up into Tim's arms and struggled tiredly. 'Dn't wnna go downst-rs-' he slurred tiredly, his wings puffing up due to his anxiety. 

'I...I know. I'm so sorry but you've never fallen sick and we need to figure out _why_ this is happening- Jason!' Dick flinched at the loud yell, his head thumping painfully at the echoing shout. 'We need to get downstairs, get him tested-'

'-what's wrong with him-?'

'-he threw up, he's feverish, none of this is normal-' 

'-Leslie?'

'-Need a blood sample. The cave-'

'No!' Dick found the last of his strength to push himself away from Tim's chest, where he had slouched on to. 'You're n-not taking m-e back-'

'We're not, I promise we're not going back! I have to gather your blood and all the equipments I need to test it is down there. And you might need an IV fluids of the serum-'

The grandfather clock shifted away from its place between the shelves to reveal the array of stone stair case. Dick felt bile rise to his throat, but for different reasons now.

'You promised!' He couldn't believe they were breaking _yet_ another promise to him, everytime he trusted them, it backfired. His breathing picked up and his hands were shaking as he hid his face in his hands as tears managed to sweep through his fingers and mixed with his sweat. 'Wh-why do you alway-ayys do thss-?' 

'Dick...' 

He spread his wings, willing himself to fly away and escape, this time for good, no more being in the attic crap-

His wings shook miserably and he slumped against his brother's chest, sobbing as tremors ran through his body and his ears were full of water rushing although there was no water anywhere near him-

His back was patted urgently and he felt himself being bounced, but the action was so far away, like it was happening to someone else and Dick was just feeling the after effects.

'-okay....okay, I'm sorry we're not going to go down there. I shouldn't have over rode your wants like that. Do you...do you want me to hug you or-'

'-down....put me down, pl-please-'

'Dick-'

'Do it, Timmy. He's not going to drop dead if you're not cuddling him.' Jason's authoratively ordered and it was a sentiment of how worried everyone was that Tim complied with no snarky comebacks. Dick felt something soft against his back and his head rolled around to lie on the cushion and he breathed in relief with the distance between him and the entrance to the cave.

Tim's face was replaced with Jason, who smiled at him softly and rubbed his back. Dick reached out lazily to trace the new scar that stretched from Jason's left cheek to his jaw. 

'We're just concerned and over reacting. But we do need to make sure you're okay-'

'-by experimenting on me!'

'No, no it's not experimenting! No bonds and no lies. We'll explain everything to you as we work and _nothing_ that is not normal medical procedures. We'll take your temperature and some of your blood and saliva and _that's it.'_

'I hate needles...'

'I know. I get it. I hate needles too. But we have to do things we don't want to do.' he pulled Dick's head away as he patiently explained and reasoned, squeezing it comfortingly when Dick wrinkled his nose>

'You feel sick. That's not normal. It's just standard tests, I promise.'

'I don't....wnna go downstairs.. it'sss too soon.' 

'Okay, okay then how about a compromise?' Tim perked up from his spot on the couch's arm. 'We can't go back upstairs to the attic, it's dirty and smelly and we won't be able to fit a lot of things in there in case we require medical equipment. You don't want to go downstairs, and that's completely understandable. So how about we set you up in your old room? We can carry the lighter stuff upstairs and you can rest easily.'

'That's actually not a dumb idea from you, failure.'

'I don't think I like the new upgraded nickname from _replacement....'_

'Live with it, kid we have more pressing matters on our hands.' 

Dick burped and dissolved into a fit of coughs, leading to the interruption of his brother's banters and a hand patting his back and another running through his hair to calm down.

'What do you say?'

'Nno...binds.'

'I promise, nothing remotely relatable to bonds. So, will you let me carry you upstairs and tuck you in? Alfred will be pleased to have you back in your room-'

'Wait, why do you get to carry him upstairs? I don't want to be the carrier donkey and besides, you're still hurt...'

'If your concern really is for my health, which I highly doubt, climbing down stone steps rather than climbing up wooden stairs is more dangerous for me and gives me a bigger chance of getting hurt.'

'Okay, full disclosure, I really don't care if you get hurt. I'm not hurting my back carrying equipments through the entire house.'

'You fit the carrier doneky image better then I do-'

Dick burped again and blew up his cheeks to hold in any chances of vomit climbing back up his throat. 

'-alright, rock paper scissors to see who gets to do what.'

'You're on.'

Dick closed his eyes as his brothers played the innane game to block out the sunlight which was causing his head to thrum. A second later, based on Jason's triumphant yells and Tim's defeated groan, he could decipher who the winner was.

'Get to it, human trolley. I'm going to pick you up now, kiddo.' Jason turned back to Dick and his voice instinctly dropping in to a more gentler tone and the room spun as Jason stood up and placed him on his hip, grunting in pain as he shifted the child in his arms.

'You oka-ay?'

'Shoulder hurts. Don't uh- rub your face against it or anything. Hips hurt too.'

'I can sstay here.' 

'Nah, it'll be better for you to be in your own bed. I'll be fine, I've weathered through worse anyway. Plus, the further you are from the cave, the more work Tim has to put in and the more miserable he'll be.'

They began to move and Dick tightened his arms and lifted himself up as much as his trembling body allowed him to, so as to lessen the strain on Jason. He looked around his surroundings as he was carried upstairs, taking in the hallways and rooms that he hadn't seen in god knows how long. He noted that the ugly beige vase on the shelf on the second floor was missing and the curtains on one of the windows had been changed from cream to lace bony white.

'Werre's....tha-t vase?'

'Hmm? Aah, blame Damian. Him, Stephanie and J'onn got a little too competitive when they were doing- I don't even know what. I woke up when Alfred was scolding them and I didn't really care enough to get up and investigate.' 

He hip checked the door open and grunted in pain as old wounds acted up and Dick blinked at the soft blue carpet and the sun light streaming through the windows. It was a nice change from his usual surroundings.

'Get ready bud, rough landing incoming.' Dick was dropped and bounced on the mattress, a high pitched whine escaping past his lips as the action caused spikes of pain to course through his body. He slowly turned on his side to free his wings from where they'd gotten uncomfortably stuck behind his back.

'Ow.' he complained tiredly, reaching up to rub his eyes, which were puffy and burning from his crying sensation.

'I second that.' Jason groaned and Dick gave a surprised giggle as Jason flopped down next to him, the elder brother throwing his arm over his eyes.

It hit Dick that he hadn't really been in this close of a proximity to....anyone really, since the second month of his treatment. Hugs and cuddles hadn't offered the same comfort to him that they used to and his family wasn't exactly ones to initiate physical comforting touches themselves. Other than the hug he'd given Jason when he'd finally visited him again after his injury, he'd been cuddle- starved for a long time.

He had forgotten how much of an instict it was for him to just cuddle with the person next to him. He'd missed the warm touch, the comfort that came to him by being wrapped up in his family's arms.

He turned to his side with some effort and leant forward to tuck his head under Jason's chin, smiling as a strong arm immediately curled around his shoulder and pulled him closer.

Dick closed his eyes as a quick kiss was pressed to his mangy hair, keeping an ear out for Tim's approaching footsteps. He really wished he wouldn't have to go through....what was coming.

'Jay?'

'Hmm?'

'Mm scared...'

Jason sighed and nails scraped against his skull comfortingly. 'I know bud. But it's going to okay, we're all here with you.'

'Jus member....no binds.'

'I promise.'

'I'll leave fff yuu lie...'

Jason tensed beneath him and hugged Dick tighter. 'That won't be necessary. The tests will be over and everything will be back to normal soon.' 

~

'Just close your eyes Dick, I'll make it quick.'

'Do you have to?'

'Unfortunately, I do. You'll just feel a pinch and it'll be over.' 

Dick nodded but still didn't extend his arm to Tim, keeping it tucked tightly against his chest and under his blanket. He really didn't like needles, it had been a recently developed phobia but it was very strong.

'Come on Dickie. We can watch Big hero 6 after we're done.'

Dick sighed and slowly retracted his hand from his hidden spot, reluctantly letting Tim tightly grasp his wrist. Dick curled his hand in to a fist and couldn't hold the whimper in as Tim lifted the needle.

Tim let his hand fall and sighed guiltily, rubbing a hands through his hair. 'Come on man, just close your eyes. If you keep looking at me like that, I'll die from guilt.'

'Sorry....just don't like needles.'

'I know...just-'

'Wait.' a new voice demanded and Dick looked away from his older brother to see Cass hobbling over to them and Dick let out a surprised noise as she bounced over to flop on to his other side. She slid her arm under Dick's head and guided his face to hide it in his shoulder, propping her cheek against his newly washed hair. 'Go.'

Tim nodded, quickly grabbing Dick's hand and sliding the needle in without any warning. As the tube filled up with blackish red blood, Cassandra scratched Dick's bare shoulder as Dick began to cry. 

'It's okay. Almost do-'

'Done.' Tim announced loudly, relief clear in his tone as he extracted the needle. He patted Dick's wrist as he splayed a green lantern bandaid over the skin puncture. 'Alfred's making you cookies, i'll bring them up when I'm done testing your blood.'

He left in a hurry and Cass scratched Dick's arm and asked, 'Should I... stay?'

Dick sniffled and pulled away, reaching for Zitka and snuggling with it rather than with his sister. 'No.'

An awkward silence fell on them before Cassandra gave a defeated sigh and the bed dipped as she left. Dick rubbed his forehead, miserable with all his conflicting thoughts and feelings.

He decided to forget about figuring out his thoughts and just go back to sleep. Thoughts were confusing.

~

Bruce was smiling. So was Damian. That was....concerning. and it wasn't even a small smile, it was a flat out excited grin.

Dick lowered his game comsoller and shared a wary look with Barbara, who was lounging on the side with her book upside down on her lap.

'....guys?'

'We have good news, chum.'

'You...learnt to smile?'

'Do not mock us, Richard. This is a festivious moment.'

'Okay...' Dick sat up straighter, growing concerned as Tim, Jason and Cassandra burst into the room, sporting the same grin as the others. He warily glanced at the IV stand in Cassandra's grasp before glancing up at his clock over the doorway. 'Shouldn't you guys be on parole?'

It had been sixteen hours since he'd been bought up to his room and the day had been full of his family popping in and out, all looking pleased at seeing Dick back in his room but worried at his state. 

'We are departing soon. But we have good news before we do.' Damian announced, just as Alfred marched in. 'We have received the results back from your blood and saliva tests and-'

'-the treatment worked!' Tim announced happily, bouncing over to Dick with an energy he hadn't thought the elder could posses. 'The whole reason you got sick was because your body was _rejecting_ the serum because it's going overboard!'

'I wanted to be the one to tell him!' Damian cried furiously, not noticing Jason's annoyed eye roll. 

'You snooze, you lose.' Tim snarked back and smirked as Damian's eyes lit up in anger.

'You as-'

'The important thing is-' Bruce interrupted Damian, glaring at both his son as he perched on Dick's side. '-that we can stop the treatment soon. You're healthier then you've ever been and you falling sick was your body's way of informing us that we can lower the dosage.'

'Lower it? Not...stop?'

'Not so abruptly.' Jason explained, wrapping an arm around Damian's shoulders and thightening it when the other tried to push it off. 'Your body won't be able to handle that so we'll start slow. One dosage a day, and then one dosage on alternative days and then only twice a week until we can stop overall.' 

Dick's heart soared and he sat up straight, glancing at Barbara, who was mimicking his grin. The torment was finally coming to an end, he could finally go back to being normal-

_Normal._

He deflated and sagged against his propped up pillows. 'What's next?' 

The others shared a look, clearly confused. 'What do you mean?'

'You guys told me you had an endgame. And that there would be a second phase. Do we start that right away?'

'No, not right away.' Tim rejected quickly, shaking his head in a crazed manner. Behind him, Damian was kicking the back of his foot repeatedly against Jason's leg as he tried to escape the choke hold. 'You need a break and your body will need to learn how to cope with not having serums boosting itself before we can start the second phase.'

'What's...the second phase?'

'Dick...'

'I need to know. I don't want to get happy and then be disappointed again.'

'Er-'

'Oh, just tell him B.' Barbara called impatiently. 'He has the right to know. And he can handle it.'

'Okay, okay.' Bruce relented, running a hand through his hair. 'This serum has strengthened your wings, effectively putting less strain on your heart and other organs. Your renegation skills have slightly improved too but in order to enlist you back into the real world, that isn't enough. We cannot amputate your wings and we can't let you go back in to normal society with them which leaves us one option.'

Dick sagged against his pillows, shoulders dropping in discouragment. 'Stay locked up in the manor forever?'

'No. The second serum...Martian manhunted and the flash have helped us developed it and have provided their own components from their body to finish the serum. With your improved renegation powers, the next goal can be achieved with ease. The new set of serums will allow your body to absorb your wings at your whim, so that they can be hidden and tucked away without having to be uncomfortably wrapped up and hidden beneath coats.'

'I...I will be able to absorb them? Like....appear human?'

'Absolutely. We're going to try our best to make sure the process of your back absorbing your wings is as painless as possible but that is the end goal for this whole treatment.'

Dick could feel himself buzzing with energy and excitement, his eyes glistening brightly as he rubbed his wing between his finger and thumb, for once feeling no sense of loathing towards the organ. 'And then? I can go out?'

'Of course. You'll be enrolled in school, take part in any activu- oof!' His words were cut off as Dick launched himself at his father, wrapping him into a humongous hug as his whole body shook with barely contained happiness. 

Hesitant hands came up to hug him back as Bruce slowly relaxed, his fingers brushing over Dick's cheek to check his temperature. 'We'll hook you up to an IV for now and the next dosage will be tomorrow at 2. Sounds good?'

'Not really but the rest makes up for it.' Dick answered honestly, not protesting as Barbara gently took his wrist as Bruce lay him back on the bed. Dick kept his eyes glued to Bruce as his siblings bustled around to set up the IV stand and bag and insert the needle in to his right hand.

Bruce ran a hand down his arm, eyes soft. 'How do you feel?'

Their attentions was pulled towards Damian and Jason, who had loudly crashed on to the floor as they squabbled, Jason grunting as he was continuously elbowed in the stomach but stubbornly kept his arms wrapped around Damian's throat.

'Exhausted.' Dick answered honestly, turning back to his father. 'But happy. I- thank you dad.' 

Bruce looked confused but the side of his eyes crinkled happily, the way they always did whenever he was addressed as _Dad._

The smile eased the subtle guilt that had been swirling in him for god knows how long, because no matter how angry Dick was at them, he knew how tense and miserable his family had been since he'd barred himself up in the attic. He knew it hurt them and while he had felt an odd sense of vindication at their pain at the start, it didn't feel so good anymore.

'No problem kiddo.'

~

Damian held out a bowl of strawberry to the youngest who frowned at him. 'I'm suppose to get my shots in four hours...'

'So? As the amount of dosages lessens, so does the duration of your partial fast. You only have to fast for three hours before the shots.'

Dick lit up, lurching for the bowl and greedily putting two large strawberries into his mouth at once. Damian couldn't help but smile at the 180 flip in Dick's personality lately, it was such a welcome change from the usual brooding that he'd been lost in. As Alfred had commented, there were enough brooders in the family.

Though it did make him feel guilty for how much the treatment had affected the boy, he'd almost forgotten how excitable and happy Dick used to.

'Can I put chocolate on it?'

'That sounds revolting.'

'Please?'

'.....Fine. I shall fetch you the jar.'

Though he hadn't really missed his astounding good combinations and the astounding powers of Richard's puppy eyes.

~

Dick was playing on Tim's phone when he realised that he hadn't seen his family members for a while. It was even weirder when he realised that it was nearing midnight and no one had popped in to try and get him to fall asleep sooner. 

Huh. That was suspicious.

He sat up straight and scratched at the arm that was attached to an IV. It had been a while since Damian had hooked him up, and the bag was nearly empty. 

He swung his legs off his bed, crinkled wrappers from his previous snacks falling to the floor and he gripped the IV stand to stabalise himself. His fever had broken two days ago and the IV was really serving as a caution in case it popped up again but since his dosage had been lesssneed, he'd been doing much better.

He gripped the handle that allowed him to veer the stand alongside him as he creapt out of his room, raising his brow at all the empty bedrooms. 

It was too early for everyone to leave for parole, unless there had been a huge crisis. Maybe Joker had broken out again, though that wouldn't explain Jason's absence. Dick had noticed that the others tended to keep the eldest in the dark whenever it involved the clown.

'Guys?' he called as he stopped in front of the stairs, unwilling to climb down them. He could try flying down them, Bruce had said that after the first treatment finished overall, his wings would gain enough strength to actually help him _fly._ But he didn't think he should try it yet, they didn't really feel strong enough.

It doesn't seem like he'd have to though because a surprised looking Cassandra popped out of one of the rooms and blinked up at him. 'Dick? Why are you up?'

He shrugged, making to lift one leg so that he could climb down but paused when two surprised yells sounded from below and footsteps rushed to him. Tim stood in front of him in a second, pressing his palm against Dick's shoulders. Cassandra was hobbling up to him too, still not healed from her injuries.

'What are you doing up? You're still not in your top shape, you shouldn't be walking around.'

'I was lonely.' Dick argued, already walking back to his room with Tim's arm around his shoulder. 'Where is everyone?'

'Preparing a surprise.'

'A surprise?' Dick warily repeated as he hobbled along with his big brother, letting Tim take hold of the IV stand. 'Good surprise or bad surprise?'

'Good one of course.'

'Good for me?'

'Yes kiddo. Relax, alright?'

Dick sighed and glanced behind him to see Cassandra had disappeared. Weird.

Tim guided him back to his room and helped him settle back in to the bed, quickly switching the IV bag as he continuously glanced at the clock. 'You're making me nervous.' 

'Hmm?'

'You're acting the same way you did before all this...started.'

'Oh no, don't worry kiddo. Nothing like that I'm just-' he paused and cocked his head as if listening out for something. Dick did the same and jumped when all his family members burst in, looking like a gaggles of seagulls. Amongst them, a chocolate cake with almost a dozen candles were stuck atop it. Bruce and Alfred trailed behind his gaggles of siblings, clearly amused by Dick's confusion and the awfully out of tone song they were singing.

Dick was confused until he spotted the words frosted out on the chocolate gooeyness. 

_Happy eleventh Dickie_

Strong arms wrapped around him as Stephanie happily cried out, 'Happy Birthday kiddo! Are you surprised?'

'You better be.' Jason grumbled as he sat Barbara down on one of Dick's chair and groaned as he cracked his back, jumping away when Barbara aimed a kick at his shin. 'Roy will never let me hear the end of it if he finds out I sung _happy birthday.'_

'Crowed is more like it...'

'You know what Gremlin-' 

'Boys.' Bruce firmly interrupted, sending a subtle glare to Damain and Jason to shut their quibbling up as Cassandra placed the cake on Dick's lap. 'Not now.' 

'Fine. Do you have a lighter Alfred? I'll light the candles up.'

'I shall take that task up, Master Jason.'

'I could spare you from that burden if you just tell me where you hid my lighters...'

'In the trash can that was picked up by the kind gentleman on Saturday.'

'Damn...'

Alfred smirked at Jason, looking more smug than Dick had ever seen him as he bent over to light the eleven candles. Dick watched him do so in fascination, though he couldn't help flinching slightly when a flame blew _too_ close to him.

An awkward silence fell over them and Dick worried that he'd ruined the festive moods with acting on his trauma yet again but then Cassandra reached forward to pull the cake a little further away and the conversation picked up again.

A hand weaved through his curly locks as he stared at the letter _Eleven_ on the cake. He had never even thought about his birthday.

He glanced at the calendar hanging behind his door and zeroed in on the date today. March 20th.

March 20th was his birthday.

Today was his birthday.

A horrible thought occured to him and he swallowed thickly before asking aloud, 'Can I even age? Won't that be affected by my healing?'

'Oh, we mulled over that and you figured out that you _will_ grow but not as rapidly as an average human being. That means you'll definitely live longer than average and if someone grows an inch tall in two months after hitting puberty, you'll probably hit puberty way later. Growth will be slow but it is immenent.....'

That was good. If he could age, it would mean he would eventually die. He hadn't even realised how much he'd feared immortality until now. He didn't want to live forever without his family, he didn't want to see everyone he cared about permanently leave him. And if he was immortal, it would mean he'd stay frozen in a child's body forever, which meant he'd have to stay hidden forever. No one could be explain why a child looked the same as he did twenty years ago and let him continue to be a functional member of society.

Bummer that he would die though. And that everyone he cared and loved would die. But he wasn't going to focus on that now, not with Bruce nudging him to blow his candles out. He smiled, a true genuine smile as he puffed his cheeks out and blew the candles out, giving a startled giggle when Bruce swiped some frosting on to his nose.

He squirmed and laughed loudly as Cass wrapped her arms around him so his other brothers could smother frosting over his cheeks and chin. Alfred's disappeovemnet was lost in the chaos as Dick threw his head back and laughed loudly, feeling lighter and happier than he had in a long long time.

'Alright, alright let the boy up.' Bruce called amusedly, wrapping an arm around the child and helping him sit up and lean against him as Dick continued to giggle. 'How about we open your presents before we eat cake?'

'I have _presents?'_

'Of course. It's your birthday.'

'Plus you're the youngest. You're going to get spoiled like none of us do.'

'Tim, you all get presents on your birthday.'

'Ignore him father, he enjoys being melodramatic.'

'Rude.'

'And....how about we do something new tomorrow?'

'Like what?'

'Like....going to the park? Or the zoo? After hours obviously so that we don't run into anyone or- _yeep.'_

The cake splattered on to the floor as Dick jumped up excitedly and bounced up and down on the bed happily, escaping any scoldings that might have come his way as the rest of the family leant back and watched him with pure fondness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> True pain is when you write about 800 words and your progress somehow gets deleted. And this occurs to happen to me every time I write a chapter for this story and it's just so sad because I'm NEVER able to capture the feeling I put in the first draft :-(
> 
> Also I made a parralell :D Dick was trapped with the court for fifty days and then he was trapped in the cave for fifty days. I don't know why I take this as such a huge accomplishment, it makes me feel like I actually _think_ and lay out how this story is suppose to go.
> 
> I hope you like this chapter. I don't really know how I feel about this chapter but it's the best I can do during this tiring time so I'm sorry if it sucked :-(
> 
> Till next time guys! Thank you for reading


	18. Driveway secrets

'Where we going?'

'Outside.'

'Okay....but where?'

'Dick.' Jason sighed tiredly, his grip on the wheel tightening as he took another left turn. 'Shush.'

'It's my birthday!' Dick whined, flopping back dramatically against the car seat. He'd spent the first twenty minutes staring out the window in fascination and pressing all the buttons he could get his hands on. He reached out right now and rotated the dial for the radio in fascination, causing the volume to rise.

'Dick.' Jason chastasised, quickly turning it back down. 'What's up with you? Why are you so hyper?'

'Can't help it.' Dick answered back, pressing the red button on his seat belt holder. 'I've never been in a car!' 

Jason swerved sharply, causing Dick to jerk sideways and narrowly miss smashing his head into the window. 'Of course you've been in a car before....you used to make me drive you to grocery shops to buy you chocolates after midnight at least once a week.'

'Um...I don't remember any of that.' Dick answered, scratching his neck and avoiding his big brother's eye. 'It's my first time for me. This me, I mean.'

A tense silence fell over them, Jason looking as if he'd swallowed a particularly sour lemon. 'Right...the court took away your memories.'

Dick shrugged, leaning against the door but sitting straight when Jason tugged him towards him as the locks clicked in place. 'Okay, quick run through of all the rules while driving. No leaning against doors, it's dangerous if the door opens and you fall out. You can play with the buttons up _here,_ but nothing on the gear. That can cause the car to abruptly stop. No bouncing up and down because you might obsecure the driver's view and cause an accident. Also, put your seat belt on.'

Dick pulled a face and leant to the side where Jason had shown the seat revolver and pulled it up to make his support lean back. 'No.'

Jason groaned in annoyance as he continued driving. 'Why not?'

'Because if you won't tell me where we're going, I'm not going to do what you tell me to do.'

'That's not how it's...I mean, that's only going to affect you- you know what, it's up to you.' 

Dick giggled happily at Jason's defeated tone and tugged the coat wrapped over his body tighter, though it was really getting too hot to be wearing such a thick fabric. 'Are we almost there?'

'Yup. Two minutes or so. Remember the rules?' 

Dick sighed and repeated them for what felt like the millionth time. 'No wandering off. No taking my coat off. Stay where you can see me. Don't try any dangerous stunts and don't let anyone get under my skin.'

'Good. Don't break any of them and we shan't have a proble- oh my god, I hate being the big brother.' He cut himself off with a groan and Dick straightened his chair again as he gave Jason a confused look. 'I can't believe I'm _enforcing rules!_ I was the rebel of the family! I gave everyone headaches and heart attacks, not make their lives easier by being a good influence...'

'If it helps, B still seems very worried about you.'

'That actually does help, thanks. And-' the car suddenly lurched to a step and Dick quickly held his hand out in front of him to stop himself from smashing face first into the dash board. '-we're here.'

'Thanks for the warning.' Dick grumbled as he rubbed his wrist. Jason only grinned at him innocently. 'That's why you wear seat belts. Now come on. And put your mask on.'

'Why the mask?' he asked, even as he pulled it on. Jason did the same and pinched his eyes as he pulled his hood up. 'Having Bruce as a guardian means that we're instantly pushed in to the spot light and paps- that's people who work as photographers and journalist to get private information and pictures of celebrities- tend to invade our privacy whenever they spot us. And they'll grow crazier if they see us, you've been kept from the public for _months,_ and I'm the problem child.'

'Oh...are they dangerous?'

'No, not really. They're just assholes. And if someone tries to hurt you, I'll just throw a rock at them.' Jason said confidently as he opened his car door and stepped out. Dick followed suite, crinkling his eyes and looking up at the sky as tiny droplets of water blew into his face. Jason came to stand next to him and propped his arm around Dick's shoulder, squeezing it as he guided him through the bricked entrance.

Dick's eyes widened as he took in the beautiful sight. Yards after yards of lush grass and strong oak trees and flowers stretched for miles ahead of him and if Dick craned his neck, he could see people skating and on the other side, people cannoying in a large lake. There were so many people on the lawns, lounging around and chattering away and doing quiet activities such as reading or painting.

A cheerful jingle came their way and Dick quickly grabbed Jason's hand, relaxing when he spotted the friendly looking white bundle of fur bouncing over to them. He blinked and made an excited noise when he realised it was a _dog._

'Jay! Jay, it's a dog!' he pointed excitedly at the furred creature, earning curious glances from passerbys and an amused look from Jason. 'A dog!'

'Yeah, kid I can see that. Want to go over and say hi to it?'

Dick nodded enthusiastically, staring in awe at the owner who seemed unaffected by her pet's bouncing energy. 'Can I? I've never seen a dog before.'

Jason's grip tightened almost painfully on Dick's hand before it relaxed, with such haste that the younger wondered if he'd imagined it. 'Yeah, you can go pet it as long as the owner is okay.'

The pupper had seemed to detect Dick's enthusiasm at meeting him and trotted over to the duo, standing up on it's hind legs and pawing at his knees. Jason couldn't see Dick's whole face, but the way his eyes crinkled was a pretty good give away that he was widely grinning.

Dick's coat began to puff and Jason hurriedly ran a hand over his wings, coaxing them back to their curled up form and subtly glancing around to make sure no one had seen the little movement. Dick glanced at him and gave an apologetic shrug as he crouched down to scratch the puppy's ears as Jason turned to the dog owner.

'I hope you don't mind my little brother playing with your dog. We'll only take up a few minutes.' the brunette shook her head, her hold on the leash loosening slightly and stepping closer to Jason. 'Not at all. It's so sweet that you're playing with your little brother.' She flirtily ran a hand down his bicep and Jason raised a brow, surprised at the flirting. Dick looked up and made a disgusted face, quickly turning back to the dog so as not to be traumatised or appear rude. The dog owner giggled as she squeezed his bicep, batting her eyelashes. 'Oh. Sweet and strong. You know, I'm happy to let your little brother play with peanut for a while if you want to get some coffee with me.'

Jason chuckled, stepping away and dropping his hand to stroke over Dick's hair. 'I mean I'd love to but I'm gay, babe. And I'm taken. Plus, if I leave the kid alone, I would definitely never find him and that would make my dad _really_ mad at me.'

'Oh.' her cheeks reddened as she stepped away, flustered as she pulled away and played with her hair. 'I'm so sorry-'

'It's alright, honest mistake. Most people don't even know I'm gay. Not even my family.' he rubbed Dick's shoulder and crouched down to pet peanut, who had decided he wanted the attention of both the brothers. 'And I think we've taken enough of your time. We should get going, kiddo.'

'Oh no, it's okay. You can play longer, it's the least thing that I can do after coming on to you.'

'Nah, you don't owe me anything. Like I said, honest mistake.' He squeezed the back of Dick's head and helped him get up, smiling at the adorable sight of peanut rolling on to it's back. 

'Thank you.' the boy said politely to the owner as he slid his small hand into Jason's and began to walk away. 'I want a dog.'

'So do I. I can't afford to raise a dog myself in my apartment and B won't let us keep a pet. Believe me, I badgered him enough for a dog when I was a kid. Even Damian wasn't able to convince him.'

'Oh.' Dick hummed as they walked around, his head swiveling like a top as he took in his surroundings. He stuck close to his brother, plastering himself to his side everytime someone walked too close. He still wasn't used to so many people around him. 'I knew by the way.' 

'That you wouldn't be able to get a dog? Then why ask?'

'That you're gay.' 

Jason came to an abrupt stop, Dick falling back with him due to their interlinked hands. 'What?'

'Yeah. I mean, I didn't know that _that_ was what you called it. But I knew you were taken I know you're dating Roy.' 

'How? I didn't tell anyone, even Bruce and Tim don't know and they're suppose to be the top tier detectives of the family.'

'You kissed Roy. In the dining room when he came for Christmas. I saw that. I know Tim and Stephanie are dating and they kiss everytime they meet, so it's something couples do when they're in love.'

'Well, not necessarily when they're in love. Some people just kiss and do other stuff for the fun of it- you don't need to hear that.' Jason finished hastily, stressfully running a hand through his hair. 'Okay, you're more observant than I figured. And you can't tell anyone. I'm not ready for people to know yet and I'd like to come out on my own terms.'

'Okay....but I don't understand why it's a big deal? No one seems to care that Tim is eating Stephanie or Bruce is dating Selina. Why are you any different?'

'It's- I mean, it just is. It's not norma- no, it's not weird or anything, but it's not common. People usually date the opposite genders and someone dating their own gender is not _not_ unheard of but it's still not accepted overall.'

'Oh. Will....will the others be upset that you're gay?'

'No. Maybe? I don't know, I'm still figuring things out and we shouldn't spend our entire time here mulling over my life choices. Doing that hurts my head.' he looked around, trying to find a distraction from the conversation and quickly asked, 'You wanna go to the duck's pond?'

Dick narrowed his eyes but he was clearly excited, so he let the topic drop as he instead opted to ask, 'There are ducks here?' 

'Yeah. Remember them?'

'No but I've seen their pictures in books and their babies are so cute! Plus, they match my name.'

'That's fun. I'll buy the bread.'

'Why?'

'So we can feed the ducks.'

'I can feed the ducks? Can I buy the bread?'

'Uh...'

'Please?'

'Ugh, fine.' he reached into his pocket and flipped out his wallet, pulling a five dollar bill out and handing it to the boy. 'But I'm coming with you.' 

'Don't trust me?'

'I trust you. I don't trust the people around us. Like I said, people are assholes and take our fame as an excuse to do bad things. Now come on.' 

In ten minutes, Dick was leaning over the railing and tossing handfuls of lumps of bread in to the bond, having gathered quite a crowd. Jason leant against the railing too, keeping a tight grip on the back of Dick's jacket so as to stop him from toppling into the cold germ filled water. 'That Dick kinda look like Timmy.'

'Which one?'

'The one with a black head and white body.' 

'Huh.' Jason raked his eyes over the gaggles of feathered beasts and raised an amused brow. 'Are you comparing it to his night time uniform?'

'Mhm.'

'Nice.' he chuckled and pulled his phone out to take a picture to send it to Tim. The response came immediately with eleven middle fingers emojis. 'Tim thinks it's funny too.'

Dick giggled, barely paying attention to him as he threw an entire slice of bread in the water, chuckling evily as all about seven ducks foundered ungracefully, trying to down the soggy bread. 

Jason got bored pretty quickly, he'd never been a fan of the ducks. He'd always enjoyed the dog park more but Dick had chosen ducks, so he'd just have to bear with it. He pulled up Roy's contact, chatting away for about twenty minutes until Dick pulled at his sleeve. 

'Hmm?'

'I finished my loaf of bed.'

'Okay.'

'...can I buy another one?'

'You want to feed the ducks again?'

'Theyre really cute!'

'Don't you want to do something else?'

Dick paused, looking around in interest. 'Like what?'

'I would say roller skating but I don't want you getting hurt here. It would be hard to explain if your wings suddenly popped up. We can go to the swings and get a churro'

'We have a swing at home?' 

'There are more swings here. Different styles, like slides and monkey bars and merry go rounds.'

'What's a merry go round?'

'It's a swing that you rotate round and round. You can go really fast.'

'Ooh. Can you play with me?'

Jason sighed and pocketed his phone. 'If there's no one around, then sure I guess. Just remember, keep your wings tucked in.' 

'Kaykay.' Dick hummed cheerfully as he let Jason weave him through the crowds and lead him to the children's park, a merry skip in his step. 'Is it okay for me to eat junk food? Alfie asked me not to eat anything with a lot of calories even if I'm not partailly fasting.'

'I'm sure it won't cause much of a problem.'

'Nah, I don't want too risk it. I don't want to muddle with the treatment cause it might make it last longer. Can we get something that's not too sweet?'

'How about a bagel? Or a pretzel?'

'Swings first.' 

To his dismay, they actually did find a child park that was mostly deserted, some of the swings broken down which led to the children occupying the ones with functional rides. Jason saw Dick glance longingly at the gaggles of children who were playing together and before Jason could ponder over the choices of dragging him away because he wasn't ready and letting him play with them because the whole point of all this was to push Dick out of his comfort zone, Dick had walked away.

'Dickie?' he called out, unwilling to make the choice for him on his own.

'Hmm?'

'Do....do you wanna play with the other kids?'

'Uh...' he glanced behind him as he continued to climb the monkey bar, causing Jason to strain his neck as he stared up at him. 'No thanks.'

'Alright....I mean I'm not going to force you to mingle with them but why not?'

Dick didn't answer, too focused on climbing to the top before he perched on the bars. Gripping the front bar, he slid between the gaps and hung in the air, supporting himself and causing his coat to puff up and make his shoulders look humongous. 'I- I mean I want to. But I'm not ready for that, really. I just, I'm still learning about everything and I know kids can be mean.' he let go of the bar and dropped on to the muddy ground, causing a cloud of dust to fly up. 'Dami and Cass said that they both were shunned and mistreated because of their different skins.'

Jason had a feeling that they had also been shunned for their other personality traits, such as Cass's staring problem when she first joined them and Damian's god complex and unbelievably high arrogance. He kept his thoughts to himself as Dick straightened and wandered to the slides.

'My skin is darker then you and a lot of people have been giving me weird looks. I don't want to deal with that right now. I'm too happy to let them ruin this. I've been waiting to get out of the house for a _long_ time.'

'Who the hell gave you weird looks?'

'I didn't really get a good look at their faces, I was too busy with the dog and ducks. Don't worry, there weren't many. Which slide should I go down, the straight one or the swirly one?'

'Swirly.' Jason answered automatically, a reluctantly smile pulling at his lips as Dick went _Weeeeeeeeehhh_ as he came down. 'But I'll stick close to you if you want to play with them?'

'I'm okay.' he reassured as he clambered back up the slide. 'I like the company I have right now. It's enough for now. I'll make my own friends at my own time.'

'Wise words, little brother.' Jason hummed, just as Dick stepped on to the edge of his coat and fell on his face.

Jason let the topic drop, taking a seat on the bench and hoping Dick would forget his agreement to play with him but after about forty minutes, a sweaty grinning Dick was grinning at him from the merry ground and Jason....

....Jason was weak.

He stood behind the swing and swung the it around and round, putting more strength then needed to make it turn fast enough that Dick was a blur of grinning faces and high pitched giggles. 

Ten minutes later, Jason's arm was cramping and Dick was swaying off the swing in a dizzy manner and giggling as he rubbed his stomach. 'My stomach hurts...in a weird way.'

'Oh?'

'Yeah. It's not 'hungry' pain and it's kinda like 'puke' pain-'

'-gross-'

'-but it's not like _pain pain._ It kinda feels floaty.'

'Yeah, that's pretty common after going on rides. That's a warning to stop before you actually get properly nauseous.' He rotated his arm as he walked to where Dick was swaying and ruffled his hair before he could duck away. 'Ready to go now?'

Immediately, Dick's mood flipped a 180 and he raised his head to sadly look up at Jason, puppy eyes set in place. 'Do we have to go home yet?'

'It's past eleven, pup. Public parks are closed in Gotham because it sucks and rogues like to make any public place their special meeting point. Besides I have to head out on parole soon.'

Dick's shoulders sagged and he nodded, using his long floppy sleeve to wipe sweat off his brow. Jason felt his resolve slip away and he sighed defeatedly. 'I'll get you takeaway from McDonald's on the way back if you don't tell Alfred I gave you junk food. Deal?'

'The treatment-'

'Little bird, Alfred doesn't like _anyone_ eating junk food, and he'll find any loophole to make sure we stay away from it. If you were to avoid junk for the sake of the treatment, Tim would have told you and everyone. This is just Alfie's way of making sure you don't become bloated and full of calories. If you're still unsure, we'll eat healthy for the next three to four days and balance it out.'

Dick gazed at him thoughtfully, the orange light from the street lamps illuminating the yellow in his eyes. 'Can I get the happy meal _and_ nuggets?'

'What happened to not wanting to eat too much ju- you know what, sure.' Jason rubbed his temples with his knuckles, quickly grabbing Dick's hand before he could run away. 'It's not like my job pays me the crappiest amount of salary.'

'The best way to spend your money is in the way to ensure others happiness.' Dick hummed, adjusting his mask and leading Jason out of the park now. The older hung back, impressed as Dick weaved his way through the trees and people, leading them straight to the gate. 'You learnt the way around pretty quickly.'

'Well, yeah. I'm ..a big part of the court was being stuck in mazes and- basically finding your way out.' Jason blinked, surprised at the ease with Dick had spoken of his time at the court. He still hesitated and stuttered but he wasn't disappearing into himself. His hand did grip Jason's tighter, to which the elder squeezed back reassuringly, deciding that physical reassurances would be more effective than words. Dick had pretty much heard everything they had to say about the court.

He unlocked the car Bruce had gifted him last year and the one he'd begrudgingly accepted. Shooing Dick out of the driver's seat, he turned the key to switch the engine on and flipped through the radio channels, eyeing Dick out of the side of his eye. 'Put your seat belt on.'

Dick played with the chair revolver and avoided his eye, instead choosing to focus on a kitten perched on the outside fence. 'No thanks.'

'Why not?' he asked in bewilderment, confused and a little irritated by the resistance he was facing from Dick at getting him to adhere to such a measly action. 'It's for your own safety.'

'I don't want to tell you.' Jason raised a brow at the short answer and pinched Dick's ear, twisting it painfully to make him yelp and bat his hand away. 'Jason!'

'Dick.' he mocked, letting go of his ear and reversing out of the parking spot. 'Why not though?'

'It's kinda...stupid.'

'I'm very used to stupid things. I have Damian as a brother. Shoot.'

'Fine.' Dick revolved the chair back to its original place and pressed his knees against the dashboard, reaching up to flip the sun roof open and close. 'I don't like it. It scares me.'

'The seat belt scares you?'

'It's restricting....like shackles.' 

Jason felt as if someone had thrown a bucket of ice water down his lungs and he swallowed thickly before he choked. Guilt rushed through him, overpowering any and all of his other feelings and senses as Dick's words hit him.

_He was wary of the seat belt because it kept him in place....just like the bonds they used to put on him._

'Dick...I'm-'

'It's okay.' Dick interrupted quickly, awkwardly fiddling with his sleeves. 'I know that wasn't your intention and I'm not angry or scared of _you._ I'll get over it eventually, but for now, I'm just going to avoid it.' He glanced at Jason and rolled his eyes at his expression, apparently taking Jason's sadness and guilt as judgementness because he defensively snapped, 'What? Everyone has stupid fears, even you! I don't judge you for being jumpy when someone touches your hair.'

'Wha- I'm not judging you! I'm just....sad I guess. And- wait what did you say?'

'Abouy what?'

'About me disliking people touching my hair...'

'Yeah.'

'Why do you say that?'

'Because it's true.'

'No-' Jason sighed in frustration as he took a U turn to get on the other side of the road, deciding to take Dick to the McDonald's on the 26th instead of the one that was three minutes away. This conversation was too important to be sidetracked by Dick's excitement over flashy plastic toys and fries. '-How do you know that I don't like it?'

Dick smirked and Jason was confused until he realised that he'd given himself away by basically agreeing to Dick's assumption. 'Everytime any one goes to touch your hair or ruffle it like they do mine, you either tense up or jump away and glare at them. I grabbed your hair once while you were carrying me and you froze completely for a second and then shook me off.' 

Jason nodded, his mind running at a million thoughts per seconds. 'Okay....do you know _why_ I don't like it?'

Dick cocked his head at him and stared at him for a long time before he carefully answered, 'No.'

He was lying. Dick was an excellent lier, trained by the very best after all. Even before his training as either Robin of Owl, Dick had always been a good lier and had managed to one up over them multiple times. Jason _despised_ the idea of his baby brother being able to link his fear to his biggest trauma. He really tried his best to keep his inner feelings and fears to himself, seeing as he was the big brother but anytime someone tried to play with his hair, all he could remember was gloved fingers gripping and pulling at his hair hard enough to snap a few strands straight out of his scalp, the metallic taste of blood strong in his mouth and his ears full of macanical laughter. 

He blinked rapidly to get the image of a dark warehouse and a terrifying grin out of his vision, swerving the car sharply so as not to crash in to an idiot who changed his lane. Dick yelped next to him and Jason saw him grip the dashboard in front of him in surprise.

'Jay? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have bought it up-'

'I'm not mad.' Jason interrupted calmly, blinking the green hue that was edging the side of his vision away. 'Just surprised. I didn't think you noticed so much. I don't think anyone else knows about it.'

'They do.' Dick hummed, relaxed now that he knew he hadn't stepped on Jason's toes. 'Or at least they suspect, I guess. That time you were knocked out from a stab, B went to play with your hair and Cass pulled it away. And whenever you and Tim wrestle, he never goes to grab you by your hair and he pulls his hands away even if it's the only thing that's in his reach.'

Jason was dumbfounded. The only thing that pulled him out of his thoughts was the GPS announcing that he'd missed his turn. He hastily put himself back on the right path, waiting till he had reached the service lane before carefully asking, 'What else have you noticed?'

'About you or the others?' Dick asked innocently as he turned the volume dial up and down. 'Are we there yet?'

'Nearly. You've noticed shit about the others too?' he was honestly shocked, which was rare for him. Today had been eye opening enough, it really showed how much they underestimated the kid. He'd known about Jason's sexuality, about racism faced by his siblings and himself and Jason's worst tic. He shouldn't really be surprised, Dick had figured out their night time activities in less than a month with them and they had been _very_ careful. And he was the most emphatic member of the family, of course he'd noticed his family's tics and phobias before any one else.

'Mhm. Tim hates silence. Like loathes it. He can't relax unless there's some kind of white noise behind him. Alfie once closed the TV off while Tim was snoring and he woke up in a snap. Even when he works in the cave, he'll put something on the radio. And if he's sitting still for too long, he'll pinch himself or scratch himself absentmindedly.'

Jason hadn't known that. Though he thinks he can understand where the tic might come from. Tim had been subjected to sensory deprivation more times then any of them, and it always freaked him out of his wits. Jason remembered how wide eyed and gleeful he used to get whenever any one in the family would affectionately rub his back or ruffle his hair. Being put in sense deprivation sensory was a nightmare in itself but it could also remind him of his time as a neglected child in his own house. 

He'd have to pay more attention to that.

'What else?' he hummed absentmindedly, already mapping out techniques to help the replacement without actually letting him know. 

'Cass hates being cold. And wet. She'll play with me in the rain but she's tenser than normal and she always rushes out of her clothes whenever she has the chance. I don't understand why though.' 

'Her past probably. Her dad-'

'-was an assassin who abused her and would only interact with her to fight her or assign her missions.' Dick finished and Jason slammed the breaks, quickly starting up again when he realised that the traffic was still on going. 'How do you know about that?' 

'I read the files. On the computer while I was locked in the cave?'

'Wha- dick those was top secret files, how the hell did you access them?'

'I hacked it.'

'You...hacked it?'

'Mhm.'

'And who taught you how to hack?'

'No one in particular really. Tim and Babs let me hang around them while he was monitoring you all on parole and they had to hack files a lot. I just sat back and observed and one day I was mad at everyone and alone with the computer and I got curious.'

'So...you just hacked the bat computer? Just like that? Just by watching us work?' he asked skeptically, unable to believe the excuse.

'I don't know what to tell you. I just started pressing keys and it felt....familiar? Like I'd done it before and it worked.'

'We were teaching you how to hack before everything happened. It was the first part of training.' That was the order they'd decided. Criminalogy, medicine and how to tend to severe injuries, acrobotics, hacking, robotics and then eventually, fighting and defensive techniques. 'Did you somehow remember that?'

'Not particularly. But it felt familiar. Like something was nudging against the back of my head when I started on the keyboard.' 

'Okay....that's fun. Not at all concerning. So I'm guessing it's safe to assume that you've read a lot about our...worst moments and worst enemies.'

'Yeah...'

'Dick, you shouldn't have done that!' Jason scolded, gripping the steering wheel as hard as he could. 'You shouldn't be reading that crap, you're a kid, you're not involved in any of this!'

'I know.' An odd look crossed Dick's features and he pulled his legs up on to the seat and crossed his legs. 'I know that I'm not a part of this. But I had a lot of free time and you all know everything about me and my traumas. It's only fair I know yours.'

'You're ten!'

'I'm eleven!'

'You turned eleven twenty three hours ago. You learnt all this when you were ten. You're a child.'

'So were you when everything happened. Damian, Cass, B, you, even Tim....every horrible thing that happened to you was when you were my age or younger or just a little older.' 

'Dick-'

'-I know what I'm doing Jay. I'm not biting off more than I can chew. Give me some credit. Just because I didn't hide how I feel, doesn't mean I'm delicate. I like that you all care for me and protect me, but I've grown a lot from how I was last year. None of you realise that.'

Before Jason could answer, the McDonald's sign came in to view and Dick perked up. 'We're here! Can I get a strawberry milkshake too?'

'Sure....' Jason agreed, still reeling from the bucket of information dumped on him as he pulled in to the driveway. 'Sure.'

He didn't know if he was overthinking or if he was being paranoid, as was the way of the bats, but Dick's words didn't sit right with him. The way Dick spoke, it was almost as if he was building up to something. Like....a revelation.

_Welcome to McDonald's, how may I take your order?_

He glanced at his little brother, whose eyes were sparkling happily and had pulled his hands out of the arm holes of the coat so as to let them flop around him. He subtly took a deep breath, shaking the thoughts out of his mind.

Dick was fine. He was an innocently mischievous kid who was still slightly grudgeful of their past mistakes. He was just overthinking.

'Yeah, hi. Can I have a happy meal with a twenty piece chicken nuggets combo and a milkshake-?'

'Strawberry!'

'- yes, strawberry milkshake. And for me....'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick update :D
> 
> I hope this chapter was a good give away of how Dick has matured and how he's...leading up to something 
> 
> Next chapter will be up soon hopefully. Stick around till then:-)


	19. To old company....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'VE BEEN WRITING THIS FOR TEN DAYS STUPID WRITER BLOCKS

Bruce did not like the energy coming off of Dick right now. He didn't like it at all. He had the that glint in his eyes and the same determined look as the rest of his sons when they wanted something they knew wouldn't be easily granted to them. His daughter, thankfully, was an angel compared to the others.

Tim complained that the only reason Cassandra never had that look on her face was because Bruce gave her _everything_ he asked for. Bruce calmly replied that Cass never pulled that face because her demands were never ridiculous.

'Hi, dad. How was your day?'

'Good. How was yours?' He answered, instead of indulging the boy right away and asking him what he wanted.

'Serum, homework, medicine, pranks, pasta.' Dick recited, jumping off the couch and trailing after Bruce. 'Jay checked my English assignments. He said I've improved to a B.'

'Good job.' Bruce praised, genuinely proud. He usually demanded his children to maintain straight As in school but he wasn't one to shame them for genuinely struggling. Dick was a brilliant child but he'd always struggled with English and had managed to being himself to an A before he was taken captive. 'Is that why you're so bouncy?'

He already knew that wasn't the reason. Dick could ask himself to buy him a ridiculously expensive plastic you or something else ludcrous he liked and Bruce wouldn't really need a reason to do it for him, so Dick's excitement over a good grade wasn't logical. In retrospect, that probably was not good, he had _a lot_ of money and it was very easy to slip past the line of spoiling his kids so that they felt loved to the points they turned into entitled brats.

He should really start being firm. But it was so hard.... especially for Dick. He used to be pretty good at telling him no.

But then he'd almost lost him forever and any strict resolve he had had flown out the window.

'Well, not really. I have a favour to ask.' 

'I guessed.' Bruce hummed as he propped his suitcase on the desk and walked to his bedroom, feeling like a mother duck as his son immediately followed after him. 'What is it?'

'I want to go outside again.' 

Bruce raised a brow as he sat on his bed and pulled his shoes off. That didn't seem like such a huge request, Dick had regularly been taken for outdoor trips since the successful tour of the park with Jason. Bruce had been wary of the plan at first, constantly on edge the entire time the two had been out. But other than the startling revelation that Dick had basically been observing them and had found out dozens of their secrets and traumas, it had been a success. 

Maybe Dick was going to ask to go out on his own. Bruce would put his foot down on that, he wasn't ready for that.

'Alright? Do you want to go today?'

'Yup.'

'Do you want me to take you?'

'Yeah, that's why I asked.'

Bruce sighed, pulling his shoe back on mournfully. He was exhausted but he couldn't very well turn Dick down. It was honestly impossible for him now.

'Fine, give me a minute or two-'

'But I want to choose where we go.'

'....Okay. That's not a problem.' Maybe Dick wanted to go to the park with him, everyone knew Bruce wasn't a big fan of going out in the day. That particular trait of his added to his children's and friends jokes that he was probably a living vampire. 'What do you have in mind?'

'The rehabilitation center for reforming Talons.'

Bruce froze, the fabric of his jacket scrunching up as he gripped it tightly. He whipped around to stare at his son, who shifted conciously at Bruce's incredulous and disbelieving gaze.

'Um...please?' he tacked on, apparently assuming that politeness would get him what he wanted. 

'Absolutely not. Why on earth would you want to go? You have absolutely no buisness there.' 

'I have more buisness there than anyone else really.' Dick replied smoothly, spreading his wings to prove his point. 'So can we go?'

'No! It's too dangerous.'

'Why? What are you scared is going to happen? Do you still not trust me? Do you think I'll help them escape or something?'

'No. But you have no buisness there. Nothing good will come out of visiting them.'

'But you trust me?'

'Of course I trust you.'

'Then nothing bad will come out of it either. So there's nothing to be worried about.'

'We're not going there. End of story.'

'Bruce.' Dick protested, rushing to block his exit and gripping the doorway so that the elder wouldn't be able to slide out. 'I need this. I'll stick close to you, I won't wander off, I won't even talk to anyone there!'

'My answer is still no.'

'Bruce, come on!' Dick snapped, impatience slipping into his voice though he hastily regulated his tone when Bruce raised an unimpressed brow. 'I want to go! I've thought this through.'

'Obviously not well enough. That place is dangerous.'

'I know for a fact that it is not. Look-' Bruce paused, surprised as Dick suddenly wrapped his arms around his waist and stood on his father's feet, pressing his chin against Bruce's chest so as to look up at him. '- I don't want to get in trouble again. But I also want to visit the rehab for my own sake. So either you take me or I go myself.'

'Are you... blackmailing me?' Bruce asked incredulously, unable to believe that it had only taken Dick a year to pick up his children's habit of easily slipping blackmail into anything. 

And he'd thought Dick would remain somewhat innocent and angelic.

Though he really shouldn't be surprised. Dick had tried to run away and catch his parents murderer when he was eight years old and had used his guardian's fear to blackmaill his way into being robin. 

Old habits die hard he suppose.

'I do not appreciate that Dick. You do not get your way by playing dirty.'

'And I don't appreciate being patrionised, B.' Dick answered back easily, hiding his face in his father's shirt and muffling his voice as a result. 'Look, I appreciate everything you guys have done for me. I know you've done your best to protect me-'

Bruce's heart jumped to his throat, his heart beating hard as he listened to Dick. He'd heard this speech before but that was when his children had been leading up to tell him that they were about to leave. If Dick was about to request to be placed with the rehab with the other Talons, he didn't know what he would do.

'-and I do feel safe. But I need to know my wants are listened to. So either you take me or I take a leaf out of Jay's and Tim's book and sneak out and go on my own and-'

'-First of all-' Bruce interrupted, having heard enough. 'I am not refusing your request to be petty or something. I have my reasons and those are to _protect_ you. Second, threatning to follow your older brother's lead in rebelliousness is not a smart idea, seeing as you're basically warning me beforehand that you're going to try to sneak out. And thirdly, even if you do eventually manange to slip under our noses and sneak out, you have no clue where the rehab is even located.'

'I do.' Dick answered, a faux innocent smile uplifting his lips. 'Hacked the bat computer, remember?'

Bruce's eyes flashed and he placed his hands under Dick's arms and lifted him up, wrapping his arms under the child's knees. 'I'm not taking you there and you're not sneaking out there either. I'll make sure of that.'

'Of course you will.' Dick replied sweetly as he wrapped his arms around his father's shoulders, smiling at how he tensed a bit. 'But you can't keep me under lock and key forever. Eventually, you'll get distracted because of your other duties and I'll manage to slip away.'

'Dick, enough.' Bruce scolded, frustated with the boy. 'I'm not going to stand here and listen to you threaten me.' 

He hadn't thought he'd ever have to deal with this kind of stubbornness from his youngest, he was usually so sweet and compliant. But maybe he shouldn't have underestimated his deviousness. 

He was at a bit of a lost at what to do. Usually, at such blant rudeness and defiance, he administrated punishment. Nothing extreme, just some text book punishments, like grounding them, or giving them extra chores for both the manor and for the cave. But....nothing seemed suitable for his youngest. Even if he took away his options for stepping out of the manor walls for his trips or gave him extra chores, he doubted he could squish Dick's wish to visit the rehab. From experience, any time he forbid any of his children to do something, they found alternative ways to do just that.

He could hope that Dick wouldn't have his other children's rebelliousness and devious personality but he did seem to have an unlucky chance of attaining kids with exactly those qualities.

Dick sighed into his shoulder, lifting his wings up and obsecuring Bruce's vision. 'Please just trust me. I have to go there.'

'You haven't really given me one good reason why you need to visit it.' Bruce drily answered as he nudged the wing down and placing Dick on the table, shoving away the annoyance he felt at Dick. 

'Do you....remember Rina?'

Bruce racked his mind, wondering if that was some character from yet another cartoon Dick had become obsessed with now adays. 'I can't say I do.'

'She was...my friend. She was new at the court, just like me. She was really nice.'

Dick hung his head and Bruce felt his heart twist with guilt. He had never even considered that someone from the court could have been cherished by him. His hatred for the court overtook his logic and while he had tried to help it's victims, the only ones that crossed his mind when he thought of that wretched prison were the abusers who had hurt his son.

He had no clue if this Rina girl was with the other Talons at the rehab and if she had been deduced as helpable or a lost cause. He didn't want to break Dick's heart by taking him to meet his friend only to see that she was no longer there.

'I just want to see her again.'

'Dickie, I understand that. But the public....or anyone really, does not know that you were a part of the court. Seeing you talking to them would cause questions to arise-'

'-I won't talk to anyone. I promise you that. I won't even talk to Rina, I just need to see them all.'

'Why? They caused you so much pain, even those Talons. They might not have directly hurt you but they're still a reminder of your troubles.'

'I get it....I mean I myself don't really get why I have to see them and make sure they're okay. But I just have to. I need to, so that I can move in completely and I can ge- get-'

'-closure.' Bruce finished for him, closing his eyes. He couldn't very well refuse Dick now, it would only cause harm to his recovery. And as much as he hated to admit it, Dick would eventually outsmart him and sneak out to the rehab. 

It wasn't a matter of _if,_ it was a matter of _when._

He would much rather be there to do damage control in case any questions arose or if someone tried to hurt his son.

'Fine.' he accepted, dropping his head to rub at his temples. 'I'll take you. But there have to be rules. You'll stick close to me and you won't wander off. At all. And no talking to _anyone,_ not even to the caretakers or humans. There will be a lot of questions as to why Bruce Wayne and his absent son are suddenly spotted at the Talons rehab of all places.'

'Okay!' Dick agreed quickly, jumping off the desk and throwing his arms around his dad one more time. 'I'll go put my shoes on!'

'You want to go now?'

'Yup! We have to be back by 10:30, HBO is playing Harry Potter's third movie tonight!'

With those parting words, Dick took off down the hallway without giving Bruce a chance to respond. Good choice, he would have put the trip off for as long as he could and hope that the child would eventually forget about it.

Though he doubted that would happen. Dick was persistent as hell, he doubted he could make the child forget this trip even if they waited six months.

Sure enough, seven minutes later, they were enroute to the rehab. Dick wrapped himself up in the woolen blanket Tim had left in the front seat and fell asleep twenty minutes into the drive and Bruce tapped his fingers anxiously against the wheel as he wove through traffic.

He didn't want to go through with this. All he wanted to do was to turn the car right around and carry his son up to bed and tuck him in, keep him safely away from any reminders of his past.

But no....no. That was what _he_ wanted, because it was painful for him to remember his son's pain. He shouldn't make this decision.

Everytime he made a decision on behalf of his children, it backfired and it ruined everything. Not only did the kids go on with their original plans, it put them in a tense relationship and Bruce usually found himself cut off from their lives and their problems. 

He didn't want that to happen with Dick and him. God knows, the troubles the boy ran into were a headache to solve on their own.

The drive was two hours. Two long hours of abrupt turns and gravel roads until he reached the very end of Gotham, the large bronze dates of the rehab rosing high from the ground. As if sensing their arrival, Dick shifted and yawned loudly as he gazed up at the gates and Bruce glanced at him from the side of his eye to catch any signs of fear or discomfort.

He found none. Dick was....blank. Completely blank. Bruce had absolutely no clue what was going on through his youngest's head.

Odd. He would have thought that this place of all places would have brought out every forum of emotion Dick had.

'We can turn and go back right now if you want. It's no trouble.' he tried to wheezle but Dick firmly shook his head, setting his jaw in an achingly familiar way.

'I'll be okay, dad.' 

Bruce tried to accept the reassurances but it did nothing to dull his anxiety.

He turned the car in to the mostly empty visiting parking area, the crowded spots reserved for the doctors and caretakers who worked to help the talons that still stood a chance of regaining their humanity. Dick's stare was transfixed on the white building that arose in front of him, startling out of his trance as Bruce switched off the engine and unbuckled his belt. He hastily followed the elder's actions, tightening his oversized jacket around his thin chest as he stepped out of the car. Bruce came to a standpoint next to him, squeezing the boy's shoulder reassuringly and dragging his hand down the boy's back to pinch his wings as their silhouette lined the fabric of his jacket.

Dick whined in discomfort and tucked them tightly against his back. 'I won't let anyone see, promise.' He glanced at Bruce and smiled somewhat mischievously. 'You look jumpy B. Want to hold my hand?'

Bruce narrowed his eyes but allowed himself to smirk as Dick placed his small hand atop Bruce's large palm. The CEO squeezed it tightly, comforting both himself and the young Talon.

Talon. He had barely ever registered that word when referring to his son, because to him, Dick would always be....Dick. He wasn't human. At least not fully. Dick was a whole other _species_

'B? Wanna go in?' 

'Hrm? Oh yeah, sure.' Bruce hummed, not really registering his own words. Dick waited a few more seconds for the man to lead him but when Bruce still didn't move, he sighed and dragged him forward instead.

'Wha- alright, I'm coming. I'm coming.' Bruce shook himself out of his funk and quickly overtook the child. 'Remember, don't walk off-'

'-i know.'

'-don't talk to anyone-'

'-i know.'

'-don't answer any weird questions-'

'-I kn-'

'Mr. Wayne!' Bruce's recitation of the rules was interrupted by a surprised and hasty greeting from the suited female in the middle of the lobby. Instantly, every head in the room was turned towards them and Bruce felt Dick step closer to him and hide against his side, clearly uncomfortable with the amount of attention on them. Bruce squeezed his hand again, offering a silent form of comfort as he greeted the female who had called out to him. 'What a surprise! I was not aware that you would be visiting, sir.'

'Neither was I.' Bruce answered honestly, gently tugging his son with him as he approached the front desk, where the young boy sitting behind the computer was staring at them as if they had four heads. 'Impromptu visit. I haven't really dropped by here since the rehab has started up and I just want to make sure everything is up to spar.'

'Well, I'd be honored to give you a tour-'

'No need, madam.' he turned down the offer immediately, slapping a plastic smile on his face. He didn't need to be shadowed by a curious intern because no matter how nice people were, he couldn't rely on them not to eavesdrop on his and Dick's conversation. And he was also worried about the press. All it would take for the papers and tabloid to start rolling with questions is a nosy intern snapping a covert photo.

Speaking of Dick....Bruce glanced down at his son who had all but hidden himself into his father's side. The only part of his face that was visible was a single eye, which was looking up warily at the woman. The man placed his hands under Dick's arms and lifted him up into his hold, perching his chin on the child's shoulder as his arms and legs wove tightly around Bruce's shoulders and waist. 'I'd like to observe the place without any company. I think my son would appreciate that too.' 

Her eyes flashed to Dick's back and she shifted uncomfortably. 'Sir, I do not mean to be disrespectful, but I really don't think you should bring him along. This place is not children friendly and the patients are still quite wary around humans, there's no way to know how they would react to a child.'

Dick tensed and turned his head to whisper urgently into Bruce's ear, furiously refusing to be turned away. Bruce ran a hand through his hair to silence the boy and give his full attention to...Clarissa. 'I agree. But unfortunately, my son is very stubborn. He insisted on visiting the rehab, he wants to help. But I promise, I won't let him near any of the patients so they won't be disturbed.'

He definitely intended on keeping that promise. Dick might be a Talon, but no way was he reconnecting with others of his kind. 

Clarissa looked between the two of them in despair, clearly torn between the choice of keeping up the oath of her job to protect patient security and not wanting to lose her job by defying her boss. Bruce felt bad for putting her in a difficult position, but he had a feeling that aa large part of why she was underestimating him was because of his public image. She couldn't very well trust _Brucie Wayne,_ major playboy and party lover to empathise and socialize with brain washed weapons and assassins. 

He stepped around her and nodded at the rest of the coworkers and walked towards the elevators without another word. He nudged the button with his elbow and stepped into the empty compartment before anyone could stop him and sighed in relief as the doors slid shut. He carefully placed Dick on the floor and rubbed his hand over his head. 'Are you okay?'

'Yup.' the answer came fast and hasty. 'Just wasn't expecting so many people around....'

'If you want to go back-'

'I'm fine, B.' Dick huffed, leaning against the wall and looking away. 'I'm just a little jumpy. It's been....a long time since I've been around Talons.'

He knew that. He wasn't overly eager to get his son acquainted with them.

Dick shook his head as if to disperse that thought and instead reached up on his tip toes to assumably press the numerous buttons on the elevator control. Bruce quickly pushed it away before he could get it jammed.

Dick tried it three more times before giving up and dropping back to his normal height. 'So, where are we going first?'

'The fifth floor. The Talons are taught various subjects in traditional classrooms. Right now, I think they're teaching them counting.'

'Math? Like....algebra?'

'No, such as numbers. Learning the order and pronunciation of numbers from one till hundred.'

 _'Counting?'_ But that's so unprogressive! Alfred's been teaching me algebra for weeks.'

The elevator door dinged open and the crowd that had gathered to board if quickly parted to let father and son pass, their wide eyes trailing after their figures. Bruce quickly grabbed Dick's hand before he could skip forward and keep him in place as he answered Dick in a lowered tone so as not to attract attention from curious passerbys. 'You were and are more advanced than the others. And these people haven't really had access to educational facilities for a few years. They'll start slow but their method is progressive.' 

He led him to the window that peeked into one of the class rooms but fell back when Dick suddenly froze. The colour from his face suddenly drained and be dropped Bruce's hand and nervously scratched at his neck as he whispered. 'What if they recognize me? I didn't even think about that and I don't really want to reconnect with them or anything. And what if seeing me sets them back on their progress? I don't want to cause trouble.'

'You won't.' Bruce reassured, reaching into his pocket to pull out a face mask. He nudged it into Dick's hand and lead him to the window. 'Put that on as a precaution though. I doubt anyone here will really recognise you and those who would have are not on our visiting list.'

And even if someone did, Martian Manhunter and his memory enhancement ability were only a call away.

He stopped in front of the window where a few others were observing the activities within. Dick stopped just short of the window, glancing at it warily. 

'They can see-'

'They won't be able to see you. It's a tinted glass, we can see inside but they can't see us.' Dick chewed on his lip worryingly but slowly came into step with Bruce and smiled nervously as the man left his hand to rest atop Dick's head.

Dick finally glanced inside and his eyes widened as he gazed at the dozens of talons seated in rows and columns, all staring at the professor who stood in front of the blackboard. Memories flashed through his brain, being seated in a large hallway with his back as straight as a board and not allowing himself to even glance around. But....this was different. These Talons -while not exactly relaxed- weren't sitting at attention. They were subtle movements here and there, such as swinging their feet and picking at their hair, a clear sign that they were distracted and relaxed. 

He'd never seen them like this before. He stepped closer to the glass, pressing his fingers against the window as he peered in. 'B...' he whispered, looking at awe at the various talons, ranging in age and gender and everything. 'That's Rina!'

Bruce followed his gaze to a blonde haired girl seated at the farthest left in the classroom. She was bent over a notebook, tongue stuck between her teeth and hand wobbling as she tried to balance the pencil in her hand as she clearly tried to trace letters etched on the sheet. Her eyes, unlike Dick, were completely golden but she wasn't as pale as her surrounding classmates. She didn't look any older then Dick.

Bruce's heart bled for her and he squeezed Dick's shoulder, reassuring himself of his son's safety and presence. 'Everyone who is on this floor is on a good recovery path. ' he explained in a whisper, making sure his voice wouldn't carry off to the surrounding crowds. 'They're empathising and learning to think for themselves rather then mindlessly follow orders. Rina is in good hands.'

Dick nodded, his eyes bright as he wove around the hall and stopped to observe others Talons in different class rooms. Bruce trailed after him, passing a cold smile to those employees who cast Dick odd looks. He couldn't really blame them, it was weird that a ten year old would be so ecstatic to observe recovering assassins but he still didn't appreciate the weird looks.

'B, this is amazing! They're recovering, they're....they're like _humans!'_

'Mhm.' Bruce hummed and despite his wariness, he couldn't help the smile as he stuck close to his son. 'They're doing a good job.'

Dick stopped at the last window and turned back to his father, fixing his oversized jacket. 'And...what about those who aren't doing a good job?'

Bruce raised a brow and asked, 'What do you mean?'

'You know what I mean. Those who aren't developing well and can't let go of the court's teachings. Where are they?'

'Those who can change but are too brainwashed and afraid of doing so are still going through therapy on the third and second floor.'

'And people like Cobb?'

'Shush.' Bruce hissed, quickly grabbing the boy and hefting him into his arms. 'You can't say his name just like that. He's on the off limits list, no one in the general public should even be aware of his name.'

'I'm not part of the general public though.'

Bruce gritted his teeth and glanced around furtively, afraid of eavesdroppers. All it took was a particularly sharp mind to connect the dots from Dick's words to his absence and come up with the rightful conclusion. 'I'm aware.'

'So he's not here?'

'No.' Bruce answered shortly, walking towards the elevator. 'We're done here.'

'Just because I asked a question?!?'

Bruce didn't reply, elbowing the button that would summon the elevator. Dick kicked at his knee indignantly. 

'B!'

'We're going home.'

'No!' 

'Yes.' Bruce argued, stepping into the elevator when it dinged open. 'We've spent enough time here.'

'But I want to see the others too!' 

'Why?'

'Because I'm confused!' Dick burst out, straining against his father's hold. 'I need to get my answers!'

Bruce paused and carefully lowered the boy, reaching above him to press the _stop_ button on the elevator to make the compartment stop, slightly regretting his outburst. 'Answers to what? Why can you only receive those answers here?'

'Because I don't get it! Why am I not with them?'

'Do you....do you want to stay with them?' he couldn't for the life of him understand why. Was...was Dick still angry over the treatment? It was almost non existent now, the boy only needing one or two dosages in a fortnight and the first stage only a week or so from finishing. But they _had_ really hurt the boy. Dick had forgiven them but he hadn't forgotten their mistakes and the hurt it had caused them.

Bruce knew they'd fucked up. He was well aware of it. But had they really ruined their relationship to the point that Dick would feel safer living with Talons again?

'N-no but...why did you keep me with you? You placed the rest of the Talons here and _somewhere_ else, what made me special?'

'What do you mean by that, chum? You're my son. You belong in the manor, with the rest of your family. I had the facilities, the experience and the company to raise you but I couldn't exactly support a thousand Talons, not even with my wealth.' 

'But....what about _their_ families? Why didn't they stay with them too?'

Oh....tough question to answer.

'Oh Dickie. It's not the Talons fault in any way, but they have done some.... unspeakable things. They're meant to be emotionless weapons, and most people won't feel safe having them back in their house.'

'So...they just disregarded them?'

'I'm sure they still love them. And it couldn't have been easy to let their loved ones go just when they got them back, but unfortunately, most people don't have the facilities to emotionally and physically support Talons the way we were able to do for you. I can't hold that against them.' 

'None of them? All their families couldn't support them?'

'Some of them don't have families, chum. Unfortunately, we found at least three hundred or so frozen victims who have been preserved for at least a few decades and/or centuries. Some of their families, the ones they were snatched from, don't exist any more and have passed away. Those that still have ascendants around from their original families....well, they weren't too eager. They don't know these people, the most they know of them were that they were once a part of their family, decades ago and disappeared. They have no connection or love for them. They sympathize, but that's not enough to overturn their entire life to take care of strangers.'

'But it's hard to look after Talons. Why did you keep me around?'

'Like I said, you're my son. I had fought tooth and nail to get you back and I wasn't about to let you go again. And I had the facilities. If I didn't, and if I had thought that you would recover better in the rehab, then I would have considered it.'

'And...Arkham?'

Bruce sighed defeatedly, leaning against the wall of the elevator as he stared down at his son in bemusement. 'So you did know where Cobb is placed.' 

'Read a file. Why wasn't he placed here with the others?'

'Because some are lost cases. Cobb was not a victim, was not forced to partake in any of the cruelties he participated in and the abuse he passed on to those weaker than him. He was a cruel man and nothing we could have come could have helped him. Placing him with the other Talons would have jeopardize their recovery and would have endangered the general public and the employees who have dedicated themselves into helping the Talons improve.'

'Cobb...was horrible. Really, really bad. But he taught all of us everything we knew. And...and we all did everything he did too.'

'Against your will.' Bruce answered gently, refusing to let Dick think that he was anything more then a victim. He wasn't a criminal, not like the others. 'Cobb enjoyed every bit of pain he inflicted on those weaker then him. He was a psychopath.'

'But I still did them! Nothing major! But....but did you ever think of placing me there?'

'Not even for a minute.'. Bruce replied, honest and fierce. 'Arkham is for heartless criminals. You're never setting a foot in there.' 

'But-'

'But nothing. You're innocent, chum. And you're a part of my family.' he sighed and stood up to press the red button to start up the elevator again. 'I shouldn't have been short with you. We can roam around the center for a little longer but the second and third floor is off limits. And just in case you're about to ask me, I am not taking you to visit Arkham.'

Dick smiled, quickly swiping a hand over his eyes at what Bruce assumed were tears. 'Can we check out the other floors?'

'Alright but we have to leave in an hour.'

The next sixty minutes weren't as stressful as Bruce thought they'd be. He kept Dick close to him as they roamed the art therapy room, the Talons dorms, the speech therapy areas, the play rooms for children and the gardens and playgrounds. Dick didn't interact directly with any of the Talons, but he did tense when one looked at him but no one bothered them, thankfully.

By the time they'd roamed the fourth playground, Dick had tired himself out and had climbed back into Bruce's arms to be carried again. The man exchanged pleasentries and goodbyes with the employees and doctors as he made his departure, as Dick squished his cheek against Bruce's broad shoulder, oddly silent.

'Hey....you okay?'

'You kept them...good.'

'Pardon?'

'You make sure I'm comfortable and happy. And I used to worry that it was only limited to me but now...now I know you made sure that everyone got a fair chance. I thought the others might not get the same chances as I did because of my connections with them but you didn't....I mean you didn't let your bad feelings or hatred for the court affect that.'

Bruce was taken aback by the observation but he nodded slowly. 'It is....not easy to forgive your worst enemies. Especially not those who have hurt your children.'

He would know. He had pardoned the worst of mankind. Joker. Ra. Talia. The court. Cain. Every one of the his worst enemies who had hurt his children and while he might not have killed them like the raging father inside him wanted to do, he had still hated them with a ranging passion.

It had been so tempting to leave the court and it's inhabitants to bury itself into the sand. He would have like nothing more than to bury his son's worst nightmare where it could never touch him again.

'But you still did it.'

'Yes. Does...does that upset you?'

'I...I thought it would. But mostly it just makes me happy. Because- it's kinda weird- but I am a part of their kind. And for most of them, the court was as much as a prison for me as it was for them. I'm...I don't want them near me. But I'm glad they're not suffering. Well, at least not everyone is suffering.'

Bruce's heart melted and he fondly patted his back. 'You're a good kid, Dick. I'm proud of you, pup.'

'One more question.'

'Hrm?'

'Why does everyone call me pup?'

'Oh.' That was a question he could answer easily, though it saddened him that the boy couldn't remember the origin of a nickname that had meant so much to him. 'You came up with that, if I'm honest.'

Dick pushed at Bruce's shoulder to straighter up and stare at him. 'I did?'

'When you discovered the cave, you got weirdly obsessed with learning facts about all the bats that inhibited the cave. One of those facts stated that baby bats were addressed as _pups._ I'm afraid the nickname has stuck around since then.'

Dick smiled and curled closer, his thoughts racing as he stored the particular information away. He had received the proof he needed. His place in the family was secure, enough to to gurantee that they loved him and trusted him.

That meant that they wouldn't see the next part of his plan coming. They trusted him too much. And they wouldn't suspect his next actions. There was a high chance that he could pull something completely drastic and unexpected and they wouldn't be able to stop him because they wouldn't believe he would do something like...what he was going to do.

He had spent weeks and months observing them. Had observed how they functioned, how they loved, how they fought. He had enough to get by and launch the next step.

Bruce unlocked the car and lowered him into the front seat. Dick shuffled around to pull the seat belt over himself, even though he didn't really need it. He was getting better. He was stronger then when he was taken from the court. He had learned new strategies, and now, with both the court's and Batman's (unintended) training, he would be unbeatable.

He had learned enough about the bats to know how to deceive them. His master's from the court had often sent the more experienced Talons on observational missions for the next target of the court and Dick had implemented that practice as soon as he had been able to.

Finally, months of observation and socialising would come in handy.

It was time to launch the next part of his plan. His family would be oblivious to the betrayal coming, which gave them less of a chance to be able to stop him when he goes forward with his next act.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dickie is planning somethingggggggg
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter and that this wrapped up any open questions hanging around. We are reaching the end of this story and I'm honestly very excited.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Let me know what you guys thought and I'll update as soon as I can!


	20. A lurking shadow

Bruce glanced over the information printed on the documents spread out in front of him, sprawling his signature where ever it was needed.

Opening a new trust fund was always such a headache. Why was it such a long process? He just wanted to financially support his son in the future, nothing risky.

He flipped to the next page and lazily swept the pen over the paper, glancing over the confirmation information. He know he should pay more attention but it had been a long day, full of mind numbing meetings and annoying buisness partners.

He'd take it to Wayne Enterprise and hand it over to his assistant to review the information tomorrow, just in case. 

He flipped to the next page and groaned as he rubbed his knuckle into his eye. He was so tired. 

But he'd been putting this off for long enough, and Dick was about to be made public in a few weeks or so. His admission interview for Gotham Academy was set for 13th July, and the boy was beyond excited, although Damian had deadpanned that the excitement would flop by second period.

The trust fund needed to be set up as soon as possible. Otherwise, it would eventually slip out that Dick didn't have a trust fund like the rest of his children and then he'd be bullied and his transition in to public life would become even more complicated then it already was.

A pinch formed atop his left eyebrow, an annoying headache that always arose whenever he was reading something. He knew it was because his eyes were weakening but he _refused_ to get glasses. He was not _that_ old.

He massaged his forehead tiredly, the commotion from outside not really helping the pain. He should avoid coming to the bank on Thursday evenings, it was always so crowded and loud, seeing as the bank usually closed during the weekends.

His phone rang loudly and he pulled it out, squinting at the bright screen and swiping the _decline_ button when he saw it was Hal. He'd get back to the man when he'd gotten a few hours of sleep. Or a few days.

There were more noises from outside and Bruce glanced over his shoulder in surprise, furrowing his brows in confusion. He was used to commotion and noise, but he never heard screams in the bank before.

His confusion was immediately cleared as three loud _bangs_ echoed through the door. He'd know those sounds anywhere. It haunted his nightmares since he was eight and his mother's pearls had been doused in her own blood.

_Gunshots_

He was on his feet immediately, stalking towards the door urgently and pulling his phone out to send a message to his children to alert them of the situation. He couldn't risk a call, just in case someone was situated on the opposite side of the door.

He paused behind the wooden platform and pressed his ear against it, focusing his attention to hear if someone was right outside. It seemed as if all the noise was coming from far away, possibly from the large lobby or two hallways away where the highest numbers of safes were located.

He placed his palm on the door knob but didn't open it immediately. Logically, he knew he should stay inside, he was unarmed and had no back up. Going out under the persona of Bruce Wayne would put him in immense danger and he would have _definitely_ have yelled his children's ears off if they pulled a stunt like this. One of the most important rule he had taught his proteges was to never launch himself in danger when they were under their civilian identity.

But he just couldn't sit back when people were in danger. He might not be able to knock out cowardly robbers and guns men with his bare fist with the ease he did as batman, but he might be able to save one or two civilians from a horrible fate.

He hoped the others got here soon. He really didn't want any one to get injured and he _really_ didn't want to get himself injured again, he was still recovering from his run in with Bane last weekend. 

He turned the knob and stepped out, glancing left and right to make sure no one was directly aiming at him. His eye caught two robbers holding two Beretta M9 to the back of three bank employees who were hastily emptying the small vaults.

He began to edge towards the large stair case, still coming up short with a plan. He'd come up with one later.

Wow, he was so glad that none of his proteges could read his mind. They'd never let him hear the end of it if they caught wind of his recklessness. He'd _just_ told off Jason and Stephanie for not coming up with a detailed plan before infiltrating a dangerous human trafficking ring.

Four feet away from the stair case, one of the robbers turned around and noticed him and Bruce saw the exact moment he'd realised he'd struck gold.

 _'Bruce Wayne!'_ he called gleefully, attracting the attention of his two friends. 'Where do you think you're going?' 

All three guns were pointed at him now and silence fell downstairs in the lobby, as the remaining robbers looked up at their new target. Bruce cursed silently, gritting his teeth as two of the thugs hurried up the stairs, yelling out, 'Hands over your head!' 

He gritted his teeth and did as he was told, forcing himself to go blank as they approached him. One of the robbers knocked the barrel of the gun against his head and the other kicked him in the back of his knees to make him drop on to the floor so that his head was level with their waist. 

He had managed to gather quite a crowd of crooks, four of them surrounding him and his hands were roughly tied together. Bruce subtly shuffled them and bit his tongue to surpress a groan when he realised they'd used zip ties.

'We got the big gun.' One of them crowed cheerfully, shoving his head forward by shoving the barrel of the gun against it. 'Brucie can make _us_ millionaires by just accessing one of his kid's trust funds!'

'Speaking of kids.' the burliest one spoke up, his head swiveling like a top as he looked around. 'Any of your precious children lounging around here too?'

'No.' he gritted out, glowering at the nearest one. He _loathed_ whenever thugs brought up his kids and tried to use them as bait. It happened way too commonly.

The former rolled his eyes and raised his head to shoot at the roof as the lobby had filled with harried whispers. Fearful screams filled the air as the crowd shifted, frightened and lost. 'Everyone shut up! Just because we got Wayne, doesn't mean the less of you are any less valuable. And you two, search this floor and move up as you go. Wayne's kids could be lurking around and we all know how much money he'll cough up when his kid's in danger.'

'They're not here-' Bruce bit out but a slap from the handle of the gun shut him up with a cough.

'Excuse us for not believing you, Mr. Wayne. Go.' he barked an order out to his fellow comrades, who took off on different sides of the hallway. 'You and I are going to take a trip to your vault, Wayne. Don't try any funny business or your children will be orphaned again. Now get up.'

Bruce saw a shadow move from the corner of his eye before he even moved. He stumbled to his feet just as the guard on the far left yelped and fell over the banister, his body making a sickening _crunch_ as it splattered on the floor.

Burly rogue turned abruptly and the gun swivelled from Bruce's head and pointed it to where his colleague had previously been stood. 'Who's there? If it's one of you bats, don't play slick with me otherwise I'll-'

Something red whizzed past Bruce's nose and knocked sharply against burly rogue's hand, knocking the gun straight out of his hands. The man roared in pain and held it close to his chest and Bruce quickly kicked the man in the butt to make him lose his balance and fall down the stairs. He dropped on to the floor to avoid the flurray of bullets that rained upon him as his eyes fixed on the weapon that had been tossed at them.

It was a Robin katana star, inspired by the batarang. That should fill him with relief but there was only one problem. 

It was an old one. The weapon would suggest that Damian was the one who had answered his beacon for help, but the katana was old, the one Jason had designed when he first started out as Robin. Damian's katana was star shaped and the only symbol that aligned it to Robin was that it was coloured a dark maroon and a tiny _R_ embedded into the middle.

This katana was molded in to an R. It was old. The only reason Damian would choose the older, less modern weapon would be if he had run out of his own, which was near impossible. 

Two more guards were knocked out and the bullets stopped as the rogues turned their weapons to this new threat who had taken down _four_ of their men in under three minutes.

He carefully pulled his knees up to his chest so that he could turn himself on to his stomach and balance himself so that he could stand up. As he peeked over the low wall, he saw a blur of _bright_ red and yellow smash kick a rogue straight in the jaw.

_Bright Red and Yellow_

He hadn't seen that costume in _years._

Ten years to be exact.

It had been Jason's first uniform. Either Jason had been hit by an age regression spell and was 11 years old again or..... 

The only one who could have fit in to it right now after all these years was....

_Dick._

Dread pooled in his stomach as he hurried to his feet, uncaring of his playboy image as he worked the zipties off. Maybe he was wrong, maybe it was someone else's idea of a joke, maybe it wasn't-

The mystery attacker turned around and rolled his shoulders back as two large bronze and scarlett wings flanked his sides. 

Bruce's heart dropped all the way to his knees as he caught sight of Dick's yellow blue eyes, the bottom of his face covered by a blue fabric.

_Dick._

He gripped the end of the banister, his knuckles whitening as he watched his son jump high and soar in the air, knocking out three more perps along the way.

Their eyes met as Dick soared to the second floor and Bruce hoped the boy saw the horror and plea in his own and would leave _right now._

He fumbled for his phone and pulled it out to check the group chat. Damian and Stephanie, who were on the early shift today, had both replied with am acknowledgement and their location, showing them to be a minute away.

_Get here. Now._

He pressed _send_ with shaky fingers just as Dick knocked out the second to last perp and whizzed towards the last one on the very other side of the corridor.

The rogue's eyes widened and Bruce's knees shook as the man carelessly aimed his gun at the approaching boy and _shot._

Dick swerved sideways but blood splattered on the white tiles as the bullet grazed his left wing.

 _No. No no no, not again. He couldn't lose someone again, not to a gun, not again-_

Dick staggered to his knees with a whimper of pain and Bruce was moving before he could stop himself, because screw protocol and secret identities, he was not going to sit back while his son got hurt-

-Dick straightened up and tossed two more katanas at the criminal, making him fall on his back with a grunt of pain. Before he could sit back up, one of the bankers kicked him in the head, effectively knocking him out.

Bruce barely had time to feel gratitude towards the man for his surge of courage because he was mostly focused on his son, who had been _shot_ and was now bleeding on the floor-

Dick glanced over his shoulder and he turned pale as he locked eyes with his father and he staggered to his feet, before he surged towards the open spot in the roof.

He disappeared before anyone even registered what had happened.

Bruce had just staggered downstairs when Robin- _the real one_ and Spoiler slipped in through the broken windows and took down the rogues who had began to stir back to consciousness. Bruce couldn't give less of a damn about them. Giving a glance over at all the civilians and making sure no one was harmed, he slipped out through the same window the vigilantes had entered through and hopped out in to the grimy alley before any one could spot him. 

He brushed his suit down before turning his eyes to the sky, skimming the skyline for any sight of his youngest because boy, was he going to _get it_ tonight-

A glimmer of bronze swiftly looped through the air and Bruce narrowed his eyes as Dick dropped down in front of him, curling his wings around him to grab less attention as he boldly gazed up at Bruce, cheeks rosy and eyes abright with a deep fire.

'Hi dad.'

The term did nothing to soften him up, instead filling with a raging protectiveness as he realised that half of his wings was doused in _blood._ He reached for his son with shaky hands and gripped his shoulder, pulling his phone out to dial Alfred's number, who was waiting in his car a street or so away. 

'What the hell were you thinking?!?' he hissed, continuously missing the number 2 which would speed dial his butler. 'How did you get that?'

Dick didn't answer, curling his injured wing gingerly as he looked Bruce up and down and asked, 'Are you hurt?'

Bruce gritted his teeth and pocketed his phone, unable to focus. 'How did you get here?'

'I didn't mean to intervene. I was just patrolling.'

'You were _patrolling?!?_ Alone?' he couldn't believe what he was hearing, how had he managed to slip away from everyone, how could he be so careless-?

'Yeah. I saw you. Couldn't leave you-' 

'Richard.' Bruce furiously whispered as he crouched down on one knee and gripped Dick's arm and shook him lightly. 'You're injured and you're eleven! I don't want you ever dawning that uniform again-' 

'Thought you'd say that.' Dick shrugged and Bruce felt sharp pain in his arm as his wrist was abruptly twisted and suddenly, Dick was five feet away and had hopped on to the dumpster. 'That's why I didn't tell you. And I'll heal eventually.' 

'That's not a good excuse.' Bruce scolded, rolling his wrist uncomfortably. 'You're injured and you need medical attention. We'll talk about all this later.' 

'Great idea, B. I'll see you back there in a few hours.' 

'Dick.' he growled as he stalked towards the boy, his brow furrowing in frustration as Dick leapt up the building, scaling the fire escape until he was two floors up. 'Dick, get yourself back to the cave _right now.'_

'No can do, B.' he called softly, hiding his wings behind his back and glancing over the horizons. 'I've been planning this for a long time and an unexpected robbery at the bank is not going to ruin it. Besides, the police are gathering up as we speak and they're gonna want to question you to make sure you're okay. Looks like you'll be busy.' Flashing him a brilliant smile, Dick launched himself back over the fire escape and disappear over the roof. 

'Dick. _Get back here!'_ Bruce whisper yelled but it was no use. Dick had already disappeared and true to the child's words, he could now hear police sirens approaching. His phone abruptly rang, Alfred obviously having heard the sirens as well. He declined the call and furiously dialed the phone Red Robin carried. It rang thrice before Tim's tinly voice answered, _'B? Where are you, Steph said that they couldn't find you in the bank-'_

'I'm fine. Where's Dick?' he interrupted, uncaring of manners. He couldn't focus on anything, he was still shaking, flashes of his youngest throwing himself at dangerous gunmen- 

'Um? He was taking a nap when I left for the Titans. Why, what's wrong with him-?' 

'He's here. At the bank. Dressed as an older version of Robin.' 

_'What?'_

'He's dressed as Robin. He dropped down into the bank and took down the rogues and he got shot.' 

__'What?!?'_ _

'Did you know about this?' 

'No, of course not! Where is he now, does he need immediate medical attention?' 

'He slipped away from me and he refused to come home until he's satisfied himself. Can you track him down? He's bleeding and he needs attention.' 

'I'm on it. He doesn't know about the tracker in his arm right?' 

'I don't think so, but honestly, I don't know what he knows or doesn't know anymore. All I've learnt in the past few weeks is that Dick is much more well advised than we thought. Just....find him and send Damian or anyone else after him. I have to answer police questions before I can get home. And hurry. I don't want him out there alone.' 

'Yes sir.' 

The line clicked shut and Bruce rolled his shoulders back and smoothened his hair so as to appear somewhat put together. He had to look the exact right amount of flustered. 

It took forty excruciating minutes to shake the police off and assure them that he was both uninjured and not going to sue the bank for security issues. Alfred had brought the car to the end of the street and was stood at the very front of the crowd, mouth pulled down into the frown. 

'Dick got out of the manor and brought down all the rogues with barely any protection.' he recited as he fell in step with the man. 'And he's roaming the airs unprotected-' 

'Timothy called and informed us that Richard is near the docks. Both Damian and Stephanie are perusing him right now.' 

'Then let's get home as quickly as we can. Once he's bandaged and medicated, he's _grounded_ for life.' 

'Wise decision, sir.' 

It was a giveaway of how stressed Alfred was that he was not being reprimanded for his strictness. It was clear the man thought Dick deserved it. 

He immediately goes back to try and contacting his proteges as soon as they were safely away from the police and the paps that had gathered but his first three tries to be linked through were declined. His children knew never to go off comms, the only time they did so was when they were abducted by villains or were in close proximity of a fight and didn't want to announce their presence. 

Oh god, what if they'd run in to trouble? Gotham was a living nightmare if he had to be utterly honest and crime sported up when he least expected it. What if they ran into a gang fight or something, they could definitely handle it but _Dick had to get home-_

The call went through the fourth time to spoiler, just in time to stop Bruce from calling Tim and panicking, though Spoiler's uneasy and sheepish tone did nothing to comfort him. 

'What happened? Why weren't you answering your comms?' he demanded, hastily softening his tone when Alfred shot him a displeased look from the front. 

'Your kid is a pain in the ass.' 

'Which one?' 

'Dick! Who else? We were bringing him home and then he just _slipped away_ from us! And he took my spare comm, he just piped in to say he'll be back in an hour and then squeaked _love you.'_

Bruce closed his eyes, feeling twenty times older than he was. God, he just couldn't have one day of peace, could he? 

In the driver's seat, Alfred's knuckles were completely white from gripping the steering wheel too tight as he listened to Stephanie's continued rambles, which were unable to drown out Damian yelling. Bruce picked up a few very unsavory words before he zoned back into Spoiler's indignant complaints. 

_'I don't even get how he managed to slip the comm away, how did that midget kid get so good?'_

'You underestimated him.' Bruce answered immediately, staring out the window as if he would be able to spot a flying kid if he glared hard enough at his surroundings. 'We all did. He was trained by the court in stealth and he has been taught to use his height to his advantage. He can skip off un-noticed, especially when our guard around him are completely down.' 

'Yeah, should have implemented the whole _never judge a book by a cover here-_ Damian, will you shut up?!?' 

'Alright.' Bruce interrupted quickly, not willing to sit in the sides and hear the two fight. 'Alright. I'll have Tim skim out his location again-' 

'-and we'll corner him and drag his sorry ass home.' 

'-Language. But no. It seems he gets more defiant when we demand he comes home and I'd rather have him alive and walking when I ground him for life. Just tail him, make sure he doesn't get in to any trouble and that he stays away from civilians. Just....just make sure he gets home safe.' 

There was silence on the other line, Stephanie obviously having not expected the leniency and pure exhaustion Bruce was displaying. It was probably why he got no snarky remark back and instead got an obedient acknowledgement. 

'Alright....but Bruce, this can't become an every day experience for him. If he....if he decides to be a part of our lives-' 

'He won't.' Bruce immediately replied, his tone Curt and firm. 'I will make sure this was a fluke. Dick is _never_ becoming Robin.' 

'No offence....but we all know how that decision never really works out.' 

'This time it will.' 

__It has to._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I truly tried to turn Dick evil but my soft heart can't handle it. I've never been able to write a book with a sad ending....and also it felt like a waste as I spent so much time writing fluff and then ending it sadly.
> 
> In theory, the book would be much better if I ended it on a bad note. But I would feel much sadder because DC makes Dick suffer enough.
> 
> Anyway, hope y'all like this word vomit I threw up during my tests! Till next time!


	21. The next step

Bruce was sure he'd end up burrowing through the cave floor for pacing for so long. He hated waiting for his kids to get out of the medbay, it was always so nerve wracking.

He shouldn't really be this worried, Dick wasn't dying, he hadn't even been bothered by his injury, he'd flown around Gotham for more then an hour before Tim had gotten antsy with waiting and had sent Cassandra to bring him back. The kid definitely had a lot of nerve, he'd grinned with all his might as he'd walked in to the cave and had waved at them all as Alfred had ushered him into the medbay. 

Bruce loved the boy but he had never been so infuriated with him, not even during Dick's more difficult days before the court even happened. Dick was in a shit load of trouble, nothing would soften any of the family up now. Even _Cassandra_ was upset with him, lounging next to Tim and solving a rubik's cube and kicking Tim's loose foot as they waited.

Damian sliced a punching bag with his sword yet again, angry and abrupt. It was probably the tensest the cave had been since Dick's fourth week of the treatment. It might even be worse then the time when Dick had actually disappeared. 

'Bruce.' Tim irritatedly called, nudging Cassandra's foot away before turning to the computer. 'Will you please sit down, you're giving me a headache.'

'Dick will be out soon.' Cass announced and threw the cube in the air and caught it again. 'Sit down.'

Bruce spared them a glance but overall ignored their advice as he kept pacing. He was angry, he was worried, he was confused as to how Dick could have planned all of this and had executed it under the noses of a family of detectives-

A door whizzed open and Bruce saw Damian and Tim both glance at the medbay but Bruce was looking up at the stairs, surprised as he saw a bulky figure in a leather jacket stalking downstairs. 

Jason. What was he doing here, he was suppose to be on an undercover mission?

Oh well, Bruce had learnt a long time ago to not question him. 

Jason raised a brow at the silent and tense atmosphere and whistled softly as he propped his helmet on the table. 'What's gotten up all your butts today?' 

'Mature talk, Todd.' 

'Didn't think you'd understand the sophisticated type, midget.'

'Dick snuck out in your old Robin costume and busted almost a dozen gunmen at a bank holdup and got shot.'

_'Shot?'_

'He's fine.' Cassandra assured, ignoring the dirty look she got from Damian. 'Grazed his wing.'

'He flew around Gotham with a bloody wing for more than an hour. He didn't look overall phased from it.'

'So I'm guessing the treatment improved his renegation skills, after all.'

Bruce paused and narrowed his eyes at his causal tone. Jason was objectively much easy going and lax on rules than the rest of his kids but he would have thought that the knowledge that his baby brother had snuck out and had tossed himself into an overly dangerous situation with no preparation would have struck a nerve. Instead, the man had only tensed up at the knowledge of Dick's injury but was casually leaning against the wall with no sign of surprise or worry at his dangerous adventure.

He almost looked smug.

Tim had shot up straight in his chair, scowling as he took in Jason's easiness and lack of anger or worry. It seems he had come to the same conclusion as his father.

'Jason, tell me you didn't know about this shit.'

Jason gave an innocent smile as he plucked up a juice box and punched the straw through the top. 'Why would you assume that, Timbo?'

'Jason!'

'Hold your high horses man. I didn't sit and plan this with him, if that's what you're implying.'

'You knew Dick was planning on going out and exploring as Robin.' Bruce counteracted, eye twitching as Jason shrugged as if to say _Guilty._

'I didn't know he was going to pull out my old uniform and sneak out.'

'You should have nipped it in the butt when he brought it up!'

'He never brought it up to me explicitly. Kind of just vaguely implied that he wanted to go out and I might have...encouraged it.'

'Why?!?'

'Because I wanted to go out.' Dick called as the medbay doors whizzed opened and he stalked towards Jason to wrap his arms around his big brother. 'My wings worked great Jay!'

'That's good, bud.' Jason replied easily, wrapping an arm around Dick's shoulders and covertly shield him from the rest of the family's glares. 'But I think you're in a lot of trouble right now, so maybe not brag about that right now?'

Dick shrugged and let his arms fall as he hopped up on to the table and confidentallly gaze up at his family. 'So....what's up, guys?'

'Seriously? That's how you're going to start?' Tim asked coolly, and Bruce quickly reached behind him to squeeze Damain's shoulders to stop him from bursting out at Dick. 'What the hell were you thinking?!?'

'That I needed some air.'

'Then you go for a walk outside or a swim.' Bruce interjected, his tone gravely and dangerous. 'You do not sneak out and put yourself in fire situations.'

Dick looked at him warily before his defensive stance relaxed and his shoulders dropped. 'I'm....sorry for lying to you. But I couldn't just leave you in danger and I'm trained!'

'You have not trained for almost a year and I do not approve of the court's teachings. Not to mention, it is not your duty to step in to disrupt criminal activity.'

'But I can be!'

'No, you can not!' Damian burst in angrily, shaking his Father's hand off. 'You are not a vigilante and you never shall be!'

'Damian!'

'Jesus kid, be less condescending.' Jason snapped, his protective tendencies coming into ploy. 

Bruce looked around and took in how tense the rest of his children were before he locked eyes with his own surrogate father. Alfred still looked as displeased as he had when Dick had first been brought back from his 'secret' patrol. But a silent stare was all Bruce needed to understand what the man was implying.

The rest of the kids shouldn't be here. Ganging up on Dick would only make him more defensive and stubborn and would lead to an explosive fight rather then an understanding agreement.

'Boys. Give us a moment.'

Arguments arose immediately and Bruce groaned at the headache that arose at the noise.

'Yeah, I'm not leaving you with the kid, I know how frustrating you get.'

'I'm going to stick around too.'

'He needs to be-'

'Upstairs now. You too Cassandra.'

'No.'

'I want Jason to stay!' Dick piped up amongst the argument and Bruce noted Tim's eye roll at Jason's victorious grin.

'If Todd gets to stay, then so should I!'

'Young Masters and Miss.' Alfred interrupted the squabble, easily squandering the loud protests. 'As I am sure you remember from your training, anger does not solve cases. Richard is in good hands, so let's start our journey upstairs.'

'Alfie, I know you're mad at me but please let Jason stay.' Dick tried again and Alfred gave a long suffering sigh bit nodded.

'Very well, young sir.'

'Wait no fair-'!'

'Why him-'

'Upstairs now!' Alfred raised his voice, and the rare angry tone was enough to shut the rest of them up and Bruce watched in silent admiration as they trudged upstairs, looking like scolded school children. He wished he had his Butler's authority when it came to his children, it would make his life so much easier.

Once the entrance to the cave from the house had closed, he turned back to his youngest, who had hopped on to his feet and was staring at him with a Gustavo that Bruce had never observed in him.

Dick's shoulders were rolled back and straight, his chin held high and confident, in a way that the man had never seen him before. Bruce stared him down, well aware that he was not doing a good job of imitating the child, which was a new for him.

'How is your wing?'

'It doesn't hurt a lot. Not the worst I've been through.'

'So, you're not pain?'

'Nope.'

'Good. Then let's talk about your reckless behaviour.'

Dick nodded and crossed his arms behind his back. 'Okay.'

'How did you manage to pull this off?'

'It wasn't that hard. It's not like anyone expected it, it comes with being underestimated.' Dick shrugged, looking smug. 'I snuck the uniform out weeks ago. Back in February. And I went through patrol routes all of you followed when I was stuck in the cave.'

'Tell me this is the first time you went out alone.'

'Well, first time I went out on a proper patrol. Usually just stayed out for ten minutes before sneaking back.'

'And since when have you known about his adventures?' he turned his glare at his oldest son, who shrugged unapologetically.

'I had my suspicions about all this when I took him to the park on his birthday. I figured it's better to just be able to supervise him rather then forbid him.'

'Smart Jay.'

'Shut up, kid. I'm still not happy with you.'

'You should have told me.' Bruce growled, unhappy with this new type of bonding his sons had developed.

'Old man, I would have, but I've noticed that you didn't really learn from your mistakes when it comes to us. Everytime you forbid us from something, it just ends up happening anyway. That was the whole reason you took me on as a sidekick, after all.'

Bruce remembered that. He really hadn't expected his new foster son to be obsessed with the idea of going out with him as a tiny version of batman to take down thugs and villains. He remembered trying his absolute best to rid any of those wants but he'd failed and a year later, he was equipped with an over eager sidekick and an abundance of anxiety.

He'd been against the idea of a child fighting crime too but had eventually given in because he'd released that conservational ways were not going to work with his kids. He wondered if Jason realised that fate was repeating himself by him allowing Dick to venture out as Robin. He was pretty sure Jason wouldn't be too happy about paralleling any behaviours with his father, but it filled Bruce with a glimmer of pride.

'If that's all it, can I go-'

'You know we're not done.' Bruce snapped and he noted Dick's slight tension in his shoulders. 'What you did today was reckless and uncalled for. Under no circumstances are you to do this again. Vigilantism is too dangerous-'

'I'm well aware, B. I _did_ spend almost two months locked down here watching you all train and work. And I'm not untrained.'

'Training is different from the real thing. No one gets overly injured and the techniques are not reliable. Judging vigilantism based on that is foolish.'

'I never said that that's easy. I got injured my first time out, I'm not an idiot.'

'And that was due to your actions being idiotic. Take that suit off.' 

'I'm sorry, B. But no.'

Bruce curled his fist, his heart thrumming widely. He had expected this, he shouldn't be feeling angry but god, the worry was going to eat him alive.

Jason raised a brow, the gleeful expression slipping and being replaced by something stony as he repeated, 'No?'

'Nope.'

'This isn't up for negotiations, Dick.'

'You're right, it's not. I'm not stopping because you guys are mother hens. I can help.'

'That uniform doesn't belong to you.' Jason cut in sharply, straighting up to his full length and scowling when Dick pulled a face at him. It was clear he hadn't expected Dick to try this more then once and to try and make this into a permanent thing.

'I thought you'd be on my side.'

'And I thought I told you that I would accompany you on your trial patrol. You snuck out behind my back.'

'I had to, jay. I knew you'd never go through with that, you'd get too protective. You guys still think I need protection.'

'As I seem to keep needing reminding you, you're eleven. Of course you need protection.'

'No offence, but I'm really sick of you guys making decision on my behalf.' 

'There is no decision to make on this topic. You're not dedicating your life to fighting crime.'

'Never thought I'd say this, but Bruce is right.' Jason grumbled. 'I know this all looks cool and everything but Gotham is a shithole and you've been through enough crap. Why on earth would you want to follow our footsteps?'

'Thought you'd never ask.' Dick sighed, and his mischievous grin smoothened into a more serious expression, taking the other two aback. 'The same reason you all went out in the first place. I want to help people, I want to make Gotham a better, safer place so that no more people go through what I did.'

'There are other ways to do that.' Tim's voice called from the top of the stairs and Bruce groaned. Could none of his children obey his orders? The second robin jumped down to stand next to Jason and stare down at the young Talon. 'You don't have to sacrifice all your time and safety to help people. You could go to school and then move towards a helpful occupation. Like a doctor or-'

'Nothing normal will work for me. Not with these wings.' he raised them to make his point.

'The second treatment will ensure you can hide your wings easily and blend in with the general public.'

'I get that. But I can't hide my wings forever. Guys, I hate the court but what they've done with me is done. I have wings and avoiding using them for so long is not practical. And...I started using them again and I _love_ them. I love flying, I love the feeling that comes with it. I want to use my wings on a daily basis and there's no activity that I can participate in that'll allow that.'

'Dick-'

'And you keep talking about living _normally_ but you know as well as I do that I'll never achieve that. How am I suppose to just have a civilian life and pretend I don't know about all of your night time activities? Do you really think that will work well?'

'Why not?'

'You say I'm a part of this family but a large part of your lives is crime fighting. You spend _so much_ of your time discussing cases and everything and so much time fighting to protect everyone. _Everyone_ is involved in it somehow. You can't expect me to just stay out of it all and just be the black sheep.'

'So you want to join us because of FOMO?' Tim burst out, at the same time Jason mumbled, 'You're not using that term correct and besides, I'm the black sheep of the family.'

'Shut up, Jay. Dick, for the love of God, look at your demands. You really think we'll let you out there just so you don't feel left out?!?'

'Tim, get back upstairs.' Bruce ordered, having heard enough of the arguments.

'No, I'm staying! Damian and Cassandra left, so they're not going to try and sneak down.'

'I don't care. Both of you get back upstairs now.'

'I just told you-'

'-What the fuck are you sending me upstairs for?'

'NOW!' Bruce bellowed loudly, his yell stirring the bats from their sleep and making them screech in displeasure. Dick flinched just a bit, not used to his father's angry voice being directed anywhere near him but the yell seemed to do the trick for the other two, who promptly shut their mouths and angrily left. Bruce waited till he heard the entrance slide shut before glaring at his youngest. He'd made his decision clear and old habits were urging him to walk off and leave no more room for arguments but he stayed put. He needed to make sure any wants of vigilantism and rebellion were squished out of Dick, otherwise he could not gurantee his safety and obedience. The last thing he wanted was to relax, thinking that Dick had put down the cape for good, only to receive a call that his son had snuck out again and had gotten himself killed. 

'You do not need to join the team to belong to the family. If we've made you feel that we don't have enough time for you, I apologise. We can change that, but you do not need to become Robin to achieve that.'

'And what about everything else I said? I'm not a helpless kid, B. I took down almost a dozen rogues after almost a year of no training.'

'And also got yourself shot and injured!'

'Again, haven't trained for almost a year. That makes it impressive. If you trained me, I would know better attack and defensive tactics.'

'I do not want you in use of those. Dick-' he sighed, deciding to try another way of convincing rather then overplowing over Dick's reasons. '-chum, you spent so long being hurt and forced to live an awful life. I don't understand why you wouldn't want to jump at a chance of just having a good life. Not having to hide your identity from your friends or being subjected to bed rest because of uncountable injuries.'

'Then if I make friends, I can let them come over any time I want and it won't intervene with your night job?'

Bruce's tired sigh was an answer enough.

'I won't be able to connect with anyone who lives a civilian life. Because I'll have to hide my identity from them, and hide my wings and everything else about me. You started this treatment so I could be brought back to everyday world but Alfred kept telling me that just because my wings were suppose to be hidden, it doesn't mean I can't accept myself. If you guys really want that, then that means letting me use every asset I have, like my wings and my fighting skills.'

'We all have civilian friends.'

'And you're all _much_ closer to your hero friends.'

'You're thinking way too much in the future, chum. You're still a kid.'

'The rest of them were all kids when this started.' 

'And they've suffered horribly due to it.'

'But they've all loved it too. It helped them all, you wouldn't have offered the chance to them if you didn't think it would.'

'It was a mistake on my behalf.' He'd spent too many hours in the cave, holding one of his children as they breathed through life threatening injuries and worse, he'd held two of his son's dead bodies on this very spot for _hours_ before the others had come and had coaxed him upstairs. 'I don't want to see you injured and lugging around the cave. It is enough of a nightmare to see four upon five of my children hurting 24/7.'

'You don't want to associate me with bad memories or events. I get it. But the cave is a nightmare for _me._ I'm trying to move on from what's happened to me down here during the treatment. It still makes my skin crawl being down there but all that will change when my only memory of the cave will go from needles and shackles to training hours.'

'That's not a good enough reason. If you want to spend time down here with everyone and participate, I'd be happy to teach you some defensive tactics and attacks.' They would be helpful to protect Dick from money hungry kidnappers and criminals if they ever tried to target him to get some easy cash out of Brucie Wayne. 

'In your words B, what you learn and observe here in the cave is not a reliable way to judge the best way to move through a dangerous situation. I was rusty because I haven't implemented any of my training for a year and it led to me getting hurt. If you train me and don't let me use any skills that I'm taught, if I'm ever tossed in to a dangerous situation, I'll just end up injured and hurt.'

'You won't get hurt, Dick. We'll be around to protect you.'

Dick nodded as he rubbed his eyes, looking tired. 'I know, B. But I'd like to be able to defend myself and not remain dependent on you. Learning how to fight again will make me feel safe. Just in case the court-'

'They're never coming back. Ever. You saw all the Talons that have improved and all the generals and leaders of the court are in prison.'

'I know. I visited Cobb.'

 _'You did what?'_

Dick shook his head and sat down on the floor, yawning slightly. 'Sorry.'

'When?'

'Last week.'

'Richard Grayson, that was irresponsible and highly dangerous of you. How could you visit Arkham behind our backs, do you have _any_ idea how dangerous that was?'

'No one spotted me!' Dick argued. 'I went after hours and none of the nurses, doctors or guards caught me. I made sure to wipe the cameras before I left too.' 

'And what did you do in there?'

'I talked to Cobb.'

Bruce felt faint. He should have known Dick wouldn't have rested easily after visiting the Rehab, since when had the boy ever rested easily, but to go directly to _Cobb?_

'And....what did you talk to him about?'

'About my time in the court and how I've improved. It made me feel better and more safe seeing him locked up.'

'We will....circle back to that later. Right now, I'm sorry Dickie, but I just can't let you go out there and live with my conscience.'

'You were going to let me become Robin before the court. What's changed? Have I just not suffered enough to become Robin?'

'There's no baseline to meet to become a vigilante.'

The door whizzed open again and Bruce was losing his patience until he realised that it was just Alfred. Dick glanced over his shoulder to check who it was before turning to Bruce, yawning again.

'But there are a lot of advantages. I can feel safe because I'd have the knowledge I can defend myself and ....and there's one more thing. Seeing Cobb reminded me of the court and what I had done....what I was being set up to do in the future. I was suppose to be a weapon and hurt everything and anyone without a second thought. That scared me. I never ever want to be put in a situation like that. I want to help people, not destroy them. This...this whole ordeal is the farthest thing from being a Talon as possible.'

'Dick, I understand that you're going through an identity crisis but this is not the way to solve it. Vigilantism is dangerous-'

'Which is why I should be there to watch your backs! I don't remember my biological family and since the court, the only people I care about are in this Manor. It's terrifying to know that you're all in danger every night but not being able to help or protect anyone!'

'Having you out there will only cause everyone to be more nervous, no one wants you getting hurt Dickie. I understand your reasons but I still forbid it. And not only that, we still have to deal with your actions from today. You lied to everyone and snuck out.'

Dick yawned and slowly pushed himself to his feet to make his way to Bruce. 'Consider it pay back for all the lies everyone told me while I was undergoing the treatment. Also, I think Alfie laced my water because I feel very sleepy very suddenly.'

'I did indeed.' The butler called out and Bruce shot him an incredulous look and picked his youngest up as Dick yawned tiredly and wound his arms around his father's neck. Dick yawned again in Bruce's ear as he squished his cheek against his arm. 'I did not want to risk anymore chances of you sneaking out so forgive me for my actions.' 

Dick pulled a face and half shrugged as he slipped into unconsciousness. 'Sss no kay.-'

He was asleep before he was able to finish his sentence. Bruce stared at Dick's sleeping face before glancing at Alfred in astoundment.

'Did you really drug him?'

'Afraid so, sir.'

'Is his wing okay?'

'Thankfully, the bullet missed any major veins and muscles, so yes. He shall heal speedily, thanks to his renegation skills. Which, if I may say, will be very helpful if he is to join you.'

'Join- join me?' Bruce asked, arms tightening his hold around his son. 'Wait, you want me to _consider_ it?'

He didn't receive a verbal response but the eye brow was an answer enough. Bruce's face dropped and he deeply scowled. 'Why on earth would I do that? How are you okay with this? You have _always_ been against child heroes but you're siding with Dick on this?'

'I am not taking anyone's side, sir. I am simply being logical.'

'Explain to me how?'

'From past experiences, Master Dick has rebelled violently against us any time you tried to refuse him Robin and he has shown us up time after time. For more then three months, he has continuously reveled hidden information that we had no clue he had possession of. How can you honestly ensure that you will be able to keep him home now?'

'I don't know but I shall do it. It's not going to be that hard, there will be seven of us and one of him. He's eleven.'

'And as he has shown us, underestimating his abilities has only led us to loss.' 

'We'll find a way.'

'Master Bruce.' A hand squeezed his shoulder and stopped him in his tracks. 'Do not let your stubbornness shade your decision. As much as I loathe enrolling any of the children in to this lifestyle, I have always acknowledged that Batman has done a lot of good. You would not have met any of them if you hadn't been batman and I fear alot of them would have turned up dead if you didn't give them a chance to be Robin. Master Dick is impulsive and highly untrained, but under your leadership, we can ensure that he is kept in the confines of the cave under everyone's protection till he is at a somewhat suitable age.'

'None of them waited till they were eighteen to start patrolling.'

'And I doubt Master Dick will accept your ultimation rejection. We may be able to put off the next attempt to sneak out and fight for a while but Dick is right, we will slip up and grow lenient. At least by training him, we can ensure that if he does disobey us again, he will be well trained.'

'He'll _always_ have a target on his back. We just ensured his safety, I'm not okay with him being in danger again.'

'I fear sir, that the boy will never sit calmly and will not enjoy being a normal boy. Perhaps the most we can do, is make sure that we will be there to protect him from anything that dared to hurt him. Do think about it sir, while I prepare the medbay.'

Bruce dropped his head and stared down at his youngest, eyes softening as he noted the chubby cheeks and the relaxed expression. He unwound one arm from beneath the boy's knee and stroked a hand through his hair, heart heavy as he mulled over Alfred's words. He had been so set on his decision, but of course Alfred would make him doubt it all.

Dick sighed contently in his sleep and Bruce's heart broke at the idea of his voice shaky due to withering in pain. But Alfred was right, his children had never respected logical ways of staying safe. They couldn't just accept that staying in the safe conserves of the Manor and living a normal boring billionaire life was a suitable option, their choice of a rich life was....vigilantism.

He didn't want to do this. He didn't want to make this decision. But the only reason he was banning Dick from Robin was because he wanted to keep him _safe._

If there was an unconventional way that worked the best, Bruce....would have to consider it.

But vigilantism....having another child in the battle field couldn't _possibly_ be a good idea.

Could it?

~

'You have got to be kidding me.' Jason burst out, ignoring Dick's excited whoops and Bruce's exhausted sigh.

'I, unfortunately, am not. This is happening.'

'YES, YES, YES!' Jason stumbled as Dick threw himself at him and hugged him tightly around his middle. On the couch, Cassandra and Tim looked as if they'd swallowed something sour and Damian was glaring at the shelf. The only person who appeared composed was Alfred, who was pouring out tea with a pleased smile. 

'Dick.' Bruce called, gesturing to the empty chair. 'Sit down.'

'Yes sir.' Dick chirped and skid to Bruce's side to plop into the offered spot. The grin never left his face though. He was the only one who looked happy.

Jason stared at Dick's bright face before repeating. 'You've got to be kidding me.'

'Father, how can you allow this?!?'

'I have my reasons Damian. I've thought this through, _believe me._ I'm not exactly pleased with this outcome.'

'Surely you can come up with a new and better solution!'

'Hey, don't try to take this away from me!' Dick butted in indignantly, crossing his arms. 'If you're upset about me wanting Robin, I'll choose a new name! Don't do this to me over copyright issues.'

'It is not copy right issues! Why would it be that?'

'I don't know, you seem touchy.'

'Of course I am touchy! You are an eleven year child-'

'-I know my age, you guys can stop throwing it in my face.'

'Please gentlemen, have some decorum.' Alfred sighed disapprovingly as he handed a cup of tea to Jason, who was still staring at Bruce as if he'd grown 20 heads. 'This is the right decision, perhaps not the wisest but I assure you, it is the most suitable one.'

'Yeah!'

'Your excitement over this does nothing to make me more relaxed with this decision.' Tim said drily, blinking at the steaming cup of tea he now held. 'Kiddo, you don't know what you're getting yourself in to.'

Dick rolled his eyes, annoyance and impatience flickering over his face. 'And you guys constantly forget I'm not helpless.'

'We know you're not helpless. You have more of an advantage than any of us in the field with your skills. But it's because of what you've been through that we don't want you out there, Dickie.' Tim tried, one last desperate attempt to talk Dick out of it. 'People are going to be harsh as hell, none of your fears will be respected. They'll exploit you and do whatever they can to bring you down.'

'Lovely picture you painted there, Timbo.'

'The court exploited my worst fears and insecurities.'

'And if you go out there again, it's going to become a common practice.'

'I don't want to be overruled by my fears. There's nothing wrong with wanting to overcome them, right?'

He turned his innocent smile back to Bruce but it slipped when he saw the man's serious face. Bruce reached forward to swing the chair to face him, resting his elbows on his knees as he gazed at his youngest, the baby of the family with a heavy heart.

'I know that you state that you understand the dangers of getting involved in vigilantism with us but I need to make sure you are a hundred percent aware of what you're walking in to. You're giving up your freedom and everything you have to potentially lead a double life. You will meet the worst of the worst kind, the most terrible people who would do anything to hurt you. And....we're going to change too. You're rather coddled here, but if you are to work well in the field, it means that we too, will have to grow firmer and harsher. In order to make sure that you have the highest chance possible of coming back home every night, it means that training will be harsh and shall cover every tracks. We'll fight and you'll be thought how to get out of seemingly inescapable traps which means that in a way, we'll have to hurt you to teach you.'

Dick's eyes were wide and he looked nervous, swallowing thickly and twisting the fabric of his shorts in his hand. Bruce's eyes darted to the whitening knuckles and he gently placed his large hand over the boy's smaller ones. 'I promise you that it will not be done with any malicious intent. You're not going to be thrown into a fighting ring and put against an unfair opponent. There are going to be no harsh punishments if you mess up. This is not going to be like the court. But we will be tough on you. You're going to get hurt, in ways that you might not even have imagined and put through excruciatingly exhausting tests. And when you're fighting under the bat name, it means that disobedience and rebellion will not be tolerated with the same ease I do. On the field, I'm your mentor and your commander, and I need to know that you will obey my commands and that I can rely on you, otherwise this won't work.'

Dick nodded slowly, storing all the information in his head as he played with Bruce's fingers. 'Yes sir.'

'Now, I know you have a lot of advantages with advanced skills but I have rules. First of all, you shall discard any teachings taught to you by the court, I refuse to have you fighting with the learnings of such a vile organization. Secondly, I know that you have renegation skills and in my experience with Metas who have quick healing, they tend to get careless. I don't care if you can heal from the worst of wounds, you are not to throw yourself in dangers way and are to act around any dangerous situation as the rest of us. Like we only have one chance to survive. If I think at any point in our partnership that you are purposefully being careless, you are being pulled out. There will also be no more sneaking out, not until we give you all the all clear. Which leads me to my final rule, you will be trained by all seven of the bats and you will not enter the field until we have all simultaneously decided that you are ready. Until all seven of us, plus Alfred have individually given you the heads up, you're still a trainee. If you sneak out before attaining all approvals, this idea will be hung up for good. Understood?'

'What? No! I have no gurantee that you guys won't just keep putting off my admission to the filed for the next two decades or something!'

'That was what I was planning....' Tim admitted, not quiet enough to slip by Dick. Cassandra shushed him and covered her brother's mouth, attentively watching her father and youngest brother.

'I shall give you my word that I won't be unfair. Thorough and stern but fair. I don't want you rushing into anything without being fully prepared. And the time we spend in educating you and train you, you can mull over this decision. If you come to the conclusion that you want to quit, it will give you a clear chance.'

'And I guess you're going to do your best to make training an absolute hell so that I do constantly think of giving up?' 

'....No comments.'

Dick bit his lip, chewing thoughtfully as he looked around the living room, pausing at each stern faces that looked back at him. His siblings stood straight, their faces hard and cold, in a way that he had never seen them before. It was a clear giveaway to what he was walking into. If he said yes, he'd see a side of them that he had very much disliked, the commander and dictator side. But even during the treatment, he'd still had their soft side. On the field, he wouldn't be working with his family, he'd be a subordinate to numerous mentors. He doubted he'd get the spoilt treatment he recieved as their little brother. 

His eyes settled in Jason who, despite his tightened jaw, still looked hopeful that the scare of an extremely tough and brutal training would scare him off.

Dick swallowed and turned his attention back to Bruce, a determined ire coming off him and fire blazing in his eyes as he asked, 'When do we start?'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summary of the list of reasons Dick wanted to be a vigilante.  
> -friends he can relate to.  
> -feeling left out by family.  
> -wants to help innocent people  
> \- inability to fit in normal life  
> \- wants to use his wings  
> \- closure and feeling safe by being able to defend himself  
> \- forgive Bruce and family for lying to him during treatment by taking revenge.  
> \- be there to protect his family   
> \- be the farthest he can be from the talon he was suppose to be.
> 
> Gotta say, I'm actually proud of this chapter. It's been a while since that's happened.
> 
> LAST CHAPTER COMING SOON! I AM SO EXCITED, I'VE GOT SO MANY MORE IDEAS TO MOVE FORWARD WITH FOR NEW FICS!
> 
> Hope you guys liked this! Let me know if you did and what you think the last chapter will be about!


	22. ~Epilogue~

_Robin was missing._

Bruce should have known better than to leave his youngest at the mountain, especially with how upset he'd been after Speedy had revealed their secret headquarters in space. Dick had never taken well to secrets after all, especially not since the treatment occured almost three years ago.

He'd only been Robin for seven months and Bruce had been surprised by the lack of disobedience. The boy had, unsurprisingly, mastered an impressive amount of skills in two years, ranging from attaining medical knowledge to mastering numerous fighting skills. The family had tried their best to put off him being brought into the field so late, but after only a year really, Dick had shown he was more than ready. The only reason they'd finally given into the nagging a year later was because they were reaching the dangerous point of Dick getting impatient and going out in his own because while they may have taught him many skills, surpressing his rebellious impulsive side was not really on the success side.

He'd hoped that these seven months of working under Batman's strict mentorship would have dulled that impulsiveness but he really should have suspected that the good behaviour had been encouraged by Bruce's promise to introduce him officially into working with the league with the other sidekicks. 

Barry had managed to fit four hours of freaking out into ten minutes when they had noted the absence of their proteges and Bruce had tried to access Dick's tracker but it was shaky and unreliable. Diana and Clark had stayed away from him as he worked but the longer they went without knowing the kid's location, the more antsy he got.

'Batman!' Zatarra called urgently as he hurried in, followed closely by the green lanterns and Dinah. Bruce gritted his teeth, holding back a snap at being interrupted. He didn't like being interrupted while he was doing any kind of work, let alone when this depended on finding his boy. The rest of his kids were getting on his nerves too, worried and antsy at Dick's disappearance. 

He couldn't really blame them. The last time Dick had went missing, he'd been kidnapped by the court of owls and had been brainwashed and tortured into a shell of his being. Since becoming Robin, he'd gained even more enemies and criminals had grown less concerned with fighting kids since Jason had first taken on the cape all those years ago.

'What is it?'

'We might have found the boys.' 

His attention was immediately diverted and he spun his chair around, resisting the urge to jump up urgently. 'Where are they?'

Dinah handed him the tablet and Bruce pressed the play button of a street security camera showing a speeded video of a smoldering buildup being put out by various whizzing blurs of yellow and red.

_The boys._

Bruce frowned and zoomed in before the location clicked and he couldn't help the frustrated growl that slipped past him.

'You've got to be kidding me.' he groaned as he shut the video and glared at the closed door to stop himself from bury his face in his hands, an old habit he had whenever his children got too frustrating. 'They went to _Cadmus?'_

'Cadmus?' Zatarra asked in confusion, not having been caught up to speed before the rest of them had joined him in the space mission. 'What is that?'

'A lab that I have suspicions is undergoing illegal activity. Superman brought up the fire before we left the headquarters and the boys were already upset over the unneeded revelation about the watch tower. I'm assuming the anger, mixed with teenage rebellions and the need to prove themselves after Speedy's outburst led them to make this decision. A very dumb decision.' 

He looked up as he handed the tablet to Hal, turning back to the computer and trying to grasp Dick's location again. He should have a coordinate by now, if Dick was on Cadmus, it meant he was still in earth and was not involved one anything overly dangerous. 'Are the boys still there?'

'That's the thing.' John began, tilting the tablet for Martian Manhunter to look at. 'I've checked all the cameras pointed at the building and we see the children enter Cadmus but never leave. Unless one of your kids has hidden abilities to turn invisible, the boys did not leave the building.'

'There is no reason for them to have stuck around, unless you want to share what suspicions you have about Cadmus, Batman.'

'That would be wasting time.' Bruce answered immediately and felt every leaguer glare at his back. 

'My nephew is missing and might be in terrible danger the first time I gave him more responsibility. Let us in on it, big guy.'

Bruce sighed, feeling a little bad about his rudeness. He wasn't the only one worrying about a child under his care being lost forever, there was no need to be overly Curt with his fellow Leaguers.

'I am uncertain but the short story is that I have a gut feeling that the Light has something to do with it.'

 _'The light?!?'_

'Yes.' Bruce grimaced, shutting the computer and giving up on trying to pin Dick's location. 'They don't know what kind of trouble they've ran into. I'm afraid they're way over their heads.'

'Then let's go collect them.' Diana announced loudly, already heading towards the door and wiping her bloodied cheek. 'Clean up can wait till we get the children back.' 

'Good. The sooner I get Wally back, the sooner I can _ground_ him for life.' Flash announced, pulling his cowl back on with a groan. 'Iris and Francie are gonna kill me if he gets hurt again.'

Bruce felt the same way. His comms kept buzzing from transmits from the batcave, no doubt his children wanting to patch through and yell about how they'd _told_ him that Dick was not ready for the justice league quarters. It wouldn't be long before Tim got free from his mission with the Titans and would generate into the Watch tower to gather information and go out on his own. 

He really needed to find the boy before they did so. His old heart couldn't handle the stress about worrying about _all_ his children.

John held his ring ahead to prepare a jet and every leaguer that couldn't fly or needed oxygen to survive climbed in. Bruce took the front seat and pulled up his holographic computer attached to the thickest compartment in his glove. He couldn't just sit still and the comm was driving him crazy. He sent a brief message to the Batcomputer, announcing that he'd located Dick's location and was on his way to bring him back and finished it with a reassurance that he would bring him back to the family as soon as he could so that they could rip him out for breaking rules yet again. 

After sending the message, he pulled up research on Cadmus to try to find any other shady information that would give him even a smidge of a hint as to what his son might be trapped in.

He had been going over the same information he'd found weeks ago by the time they entered earth and the chair and plane disappeared as they lowered through the clouds, John having decided to make a platform to stand on instead. He gave them an apologetic smile at their annoyed huffs.

'Sorry. My ring is dying, need to save energy to get home. If the kids are okay.' he grimaced as Flash began to pace around and around, anxiety vibrating off him. Bruce reached forward and grabbed him as the landmark became more clear to force him to stop.

Superman flew next to them, head tilted to find heartbeats. 'Where's Cadmus? I can't see it.'

'It's there.' Bruce answered, dread pooling in his stomach as he stared at the rubble and ash that had gathered where a building had last stood. Aquaman paled next to him and gripped his belt harder, as the rest of the leagues faces grew hard. 'It got blown up.'

'The kids-'

'Is that them?' Hawkgirl interrupted, gesturing towards a yellow dot that had limped out from under a large stone. Bruce sighed lowly in relief as he spotted three more following.

Wait, three?

'Superman.' He commanded briskly, not needing to complete his command for the man to understand. He was already flying away, zooming through the clouds and managing to land before the rest.

Bruce saw Dick glance up at the moon as the rest of the league lowered themselves, locking eyes with his father as he held his chest. Bruce took in his torn uniform and multiple bruises littering his body, including a limp wing. He narrowed his eyes, a mixture of relief and anger rushing through him. 

Anger because Dick had disobeyed yet another order and had blown up a building along with it. Relief because while the young teenager was injured, he was still alive and walking which meant that Bruce could assign him the filthiest of chores as punishment and _ground_ him until he turned two hundred years old.

At least the boy had the decency to look slightly ashamed. Just slightly though. 

Clearly, he was still smug, standing a few feet away from a weird purple lump that was very easy to identify as the bad guy. Though he did sober up a bit as he looked around at the _whole_ of justice league and came to the conclusion that he was in trouble with _all_ of them.

Bruce was a second away from scolding his ear off right there and then but his attention was annoyingly compromised by the tall stranger who stood amongst the three sidekicks. His white suit was badly torn, revealing a lot of his bruised chest and shoulders and his black hair was matted with sweat. His blue eyes were a mix between wary and excitement as he stepped away from the group first and walked towards Superman.

Bruce raised a brow, tensing just a bit and clutching at his belt just in case this new stranger decided to attack, though logically he knew he couldn't be an open enemy if he had stood so easily amongst the rest. Still, robin knew better then to trust-

-a superman?

Superboy, that would make more sense. The boy had raised his shirt to reveal the smoldered symbol and while Bruce couldn't see Clark's face from behind him, he could guess from the tensing of his shoulders that he was not thrilled. 

He inched closer, eyes zeroed in on the sign rather than his son, who was stood a few feet away, watching the two Leaguers warily. 'Is that what I think it is?'

Kid Flash approached from behind the new boy, and Bruce unconsciously noted how he was holding his Ribs and made a reminder to have him checked out by Dinah before they shooed them home. 'He doesn't like being called an it-'

'I'm Superman's clone!' the new kid burst out, letting the cloth fall again and a scowl replace the excited glimmer. The atmosphere tensed even further and Bruce noted Barry sending an incredulous look to Superman as he zipped to stand protectively next to his nephew. 

_A clone_

That was never good.

Resigning himself to putting off punishment for Dick until this situation was handled, he narrowed his eyes before demanding, 'Start Talking.'

It took more then an hour to sort everything out and the more details he got, the more tense he became. He'd had his suspicions about Cadmus but this was _much_ worse. A whole species hidden away and enslaved by an evil yet brilliant scientist who had also programmed and created a sixteen years old boy in the span of six weeks to serve the Light's demands. A seemingly innocent building with fifty two underground levels involved in several criminal activities. Three of the league's sidekicks had been captured and brought into the attention of their worst enemies by bringing down their headquarters. Not to mention, they'd also been experimented on and had almost been cloned. Dick had assured them that the essence stole had been destroyed but Bruce was not going to relax until he had made sure himself that his son was safe.

Now, the next problem. What to do with the sixteen years old boy who was still a potential threat to the league and the world even though he'd helped save the others? Clark was clearly antsy around the boy, and Bruce didn't blame him. His privacy had been violated and it had led to him being associated with the responsibility of a sixteen year old with a lot of question marks about his existence.

His comm began to bing again and he sighed in exasperation before deciding to just give in. He stepped away from the rest of the Leaguers and pressed the comm to his ear, growling out a, 'Not a good time' as a greeting.

'Robin is at Cadmus! And the building is completely destroyed and he's not answering his comm-'

'I have found him, Red Robin. He is alright. Injured but alive.'

'Well, thanks for keeping us in the loop. It's not like we've been going crazy trying to keep shadow in line.' his robotic voice huffed indignantly and Bruce felt his lips twitch as a smile threatened to break through. Damian had always gone a little crazy whenever it came to Dick. 

'What did he do?'

'I can't even begin to tell you. Just get the kid home before Hood decides to break in to the tower. I can't keep all your kids in check for you forever, they're infuriating.'

The comm clicked off and Bruce was suddenly hit by a wave of exhaustion. Today had been a long day, full of many ups and downs and the battle alongside the league had drained him. He wasn't as young as he used to be, a few punches and kicks paired with worrying his head over his boy's safety was enough to make him drop dead. 

He turned and approached the boys just as Superman flew off, clearly having rejected Superboy, who was staring dejectedly after him. Flash and Aquaman followed him as Wonder Woman flew after Superman. 

'Cadmus will be investigated. All fifty two levels. But let's make one thing clear-'

'You should have called!' Flash interrupted angrily, glaring at the three boys who had been entrusted into their care. Bruce gave him a side glare, silencing him and assuring him at the same time before continuing.

'End results aside, we're _not_ happy. You hacked Justice League systems, disobeyed direct orders and endangered lives. You will not be doing this again.' 

His voice left no room for arguments but he knew it hadn't worked as Robin moved to stand in the middle of the group as Aqualad spoke, 'I am sorry. But we will.'

Bruce raised a brow as Aquaman sternly ordered, 'Aqualad, stand down.' 

The young Atlantian dutifully lowered his gaze and raised his hand to his chest and respectfully denied, 'I am sorry, my king. But no.' 

Next to him, the other three stood straighter, any flashes of guilt erasing from their faces and their postures screaming defensive and proud as they crossed their arms. 'We did good work here tonight. The work you trained us to do. Together, on our own, we forged something powerful. Together.'

'If this is about your treatment in the hall today.' The flash began, angry and rushed, clearly not used to having a sidekick disobey orders in such a blunt manner. Lucky him. 'The three of you-'

'The _four_ of us.' Kid Flash interrupted sharply, dropping his arms and glaring at his uncle and the rest of the Leaguers with a ferocity Bruce had not known he had. The dark knight internally sighed. Of course they'd decided to befriend the clone, why were these children so easy to befriend with each other? 'And it's not.'

'Batman.' Robin finally piped up, his tone low and more respectful then his friends but stubborn nonetheless as he stepped forward. 'We're ready to use what you taught us.' _Taught me_ was the real message but the boy was being smart in appealing to the rest of the mentors rather then to just his own. 'Otherwise why teach us at all?'

'Why let them tell us what to do?!?' the clone finally burst out, and unlike the rest of his buddies, he took no care to hide any rudeness or anger in his tone. 'It's simple, really. Get on board, or get out of the way.' 

All four boys turned to stare at the league now, jaws set as arguments immediately broke out-

'Absolutely not!'

'You're teenagers!'

'You shall not be rewarded for disobedience by getting your way!'

Batman didn't participate in any of the reasonings or arguments. Instead, he locked eyes with his son, who looked a lot more dejected at the proposal of splitting from their mentors. But despite that, he stood firmly, staring back at Batman without so much as a blink. The message was clear.

_I do not want to go behind your back. But I will if I have to._

There was no unsurity, no nervousness, no fear. His boy stood tall and confident, with his shoulders rolled back and his wings held high, making the moonlight bounce off his feathers. And despite it all, Bruce felt a small glimmer of pride swell in him.

Because this was what he'd wanted for years, right from the time they'd found Dick again. For him to overcome his doubts and fears and to become his own person, which, no matter how much Bruce hated it, was always done through disobeying orders. The boy he'd saved from the court three years ago would never have dared to go against his mentor's orders and would have worried about being abandoned or kicked out if he disobeyed and messed up. He would have focused on all his shortcomings rather then his success. And while Dick could definitely do with a little revision on how to handle things more subtly and follow orders to an extent, he was not cowering in fear. He stood in front of his mistake and graciously owned up to it but stood firm on his success. He wasn't afraid of branching out, on going out on his own, on going against orders and reasoning to get his way.

It was infuriating. But more then that, it was what he expected from a teenager. 

And unfortunately, he could also expect on his son going through with his ultimatum if Bruce didn't give I'm to his and his friend's demands some thoughts. After all, Dick had found time after time that blackmailing his dad with going out solo was a _great_ way to get his own way.

Bruce should really nip that behaviour in the bud before it got problematic. But this....this was all Dick had been before the court. Strong headed, impulsively brave and trusting that no matter what happens, he can still rely on his family to love him no matter what new stunts he pulled. He was learning new solutions through his mistakes. 

And even if Bruce was definitely going to make sure the boy thought twice before doing something like this again, he was still proud that he'd learnt to think for himself. 

Suck it, court of owls.

'Enough.' he growled, effectively cutting off everyone's arguments. 'Give me three days to come up with a solution. Until then, you're all to go home and heal. Robin, let's go.'

Dick let his arms fall and hobbled towards him but paused and glanced back at Superboy, who was glaring heatedly at the concrete floor. 'Uh guys, what about...' he let himself fall silent and gestured to Superboy and Bruce felt the rest of the Leaguers turn to him. For once, he was short on ideas. He was exhausted and all he wanted to do was get Dick home and medically cleared without the hassle of keeping up his secret identity from a possible threat. The watch tower was not an appropriate place for the boy to live without feeling as if he was being observed.

Before he could offer a solution, Kid Flash piped up, 'Hey Supey, ever had a sleepover?'

Batman sighed in relief and lifted his arm slightly for Dick to duck under and lean against his side, sparing a small smirk at Flash's whitening face as they walked away. Robin glanced behind him as he leant against Bruce's side. 'Do you think he'll be alright?'

'Flash can handle it. What happened to your chest?'

'Um....a building collapsed on us. And when they were trying to clone us, they stuck these weird electrical things to our chest.'

'Hrm.'

'I know you're mad-'

'Understatement.'

'I am sorry that I ran off behind your back. But you _lied_ to me too!'

'I'm your father.' Bruce hissed as they left the Leaguers behind and hobbled towards the closest zeta tubes. 'I have the right to hide information that I think does not concern you. Can you walk towards the tubes or should I carry you?'

'I mean....I can fly.'

'No, only walk.'

'I can walk.' Dick sighed stubbornly and sat up just a bit. 'And that wasn't the only thing you lied to me about. Were you ever actually going to let me work with the league or was this just a field trip to shut me up?'

'If you had been patient, you would have eventually been given more priveledged and access to the league's buisness.' 

'I've never been good at being patient.'

'I am aware. And while it may pass off as a civilian, as a crime fighter, it is very dangerous. You cannot be so causal about this!'

He turned to an alley that held a zeta booth and crouched down to just pick up Dick when he stumbled. The boy grumbled before cuddling against the man and rubbing his chest. 'You're just upset because we didn't run this through you.'

'You destroyed a building and brought yourself into the attention of multiple villains. I have more than a few reasons to be upset with you.'

'We discovered a potential weapon and brought him onto our side and brought a secret headquarters that was undergoing several criminal activities. That's what I'm here for.'

'You're a thirteen year old boy who is still learning the ropes of vigilantism.' 

'And I won't learn anything by being shielded by you forever. We did good work for the world, and you know it. We can do a lot better as a team.'

'Enough.' Bruce interrupted, too exhausted to continue arguing. He placed Dick on the sidewalk as he pulled a wire out of his glove and connected it to the broken down telephone booth and hacking into the system to connect to the batcave. 'I told you I'll think about it. We're done arguing about this. Until the three days are over, you're benched from patrol and any other vigilante activities.'

'Is it too much to hope that that's going to be all of my punishment?'

'You're cleaning every bat dropping off the cave floor.'

'Ew, why?'

'And sanitize all the equipment that everyone uses.'

'But there's so many of them!'

'And any other chores Penny-one assigns you.'

'Can you at the very least not tell him to give me the grossest chores?'

'No.'

'....so I'm going to spend the next three days doing unpaid labour? Please tell me that's all.'

'Not quite.' Bruce replied as the cave's location was inputted and smirked at his son as he gently ushered him in. 'The boys are waiting for you back at home. And they're very unhappy with you.' 

'You _told_ them?!?'

'Mhm. Good luck, chum.' 

The beam degenerated the boy before he could reply and Bruce followed after him once he'd disappeared. Arriving at the cave, he was welcomed with Dick rushing to hide behind his back as three raised voices yelled over each other to simultaneously scold the youngest Wayne. 

'Are you _crazy?!?'_

'I cannot believe you did something so irresponsible!'

'I expected better understanding of the dangers of sneaking around from you, Richard!'

'Could have just told us where you were.' Cassandra added in softly, watching the others in amusement. 'Hi dad.'

Bruce grunted in response as he wound an arm behind him to pluck his son up and pull him to the front. 'You can all yell at him after he's been inspected and bandaged up medically.'

'B, I know you're mad at me but please don't throw me at the wolves.' Dick pleaded, all Gustavo and stubbornness gone now that he was faced with the wrath of his older siblings. Bruce pulled his cowl down as Dick yelped and hid under the man's cape as Jason reached for him. 'And I'll heal-'

'Don't care.' Jason interrupted as he reached under Bruce's cape and pull him towards him, lifting him up and throwing him over his shoulder, grinning at Dick's pained groan. 'Let's go.'

'B, come on-'

'You're on your own.' Bruce answered easily as he walked towards the chair in front of the Batcomputer, which Tim had vacated. He flipped down and leant his head against the back rest before he realised that he was being stared down by his other children.

'What?'

'We heard their demands.'

He narrowed his eyes and turned his glare at Tim. His second eldest gave an innocent shrug. 'You weren't telling me anything so I had to find out on my own.'

'Do none of you respect my privacy or orders?'

'Not when they're dumb. What are you going to do about Dick and this little tree house?'

'I am considering it.'

'Seriously?!?'

'Father, he should not be rewarded for his disobedience!'

'As I remember from your youth boys, all three of you have went behind my back and made your own teams.' 

The two grew flustered and Bruce rubbed his forehead tiredly. 'Look, I'm not pleased with him either. But I'll make the decision I think is the best way to keep him alive and well behaved so that I can keep an eye on him. Now please just go help the boy.' 

He turned and clicked the computer open, eyes zeroing onto the picture taken the first night the new Robin had been spotted on the streets for the first time. Despite his exhaustion, he smiled fondly at the wide grin and excitement on his youngest's face as he stood perched on a gargoyle.

Dick was infuriating. He always had been. But he'd grown so much, had grown confident in his ability and his place in the family and the world and had made his purpose clear. He had grown into a brave, confident and emphatic young boy, slowly surrounding himself with loyal people who'd do anything to protect him.

And Bruce was so proud of his son.

_His little Robin._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaand we're done!
> 
> I'm not going to stretch this out but thank you so much for reading and supporting this book guys, it genuinely meant so much and motivated me so much to write the book. I honestly did enjoy writing this book and I am considering following up with one shots about Talon Dick and his family in the future but I'm more excited about writing about other stories!
> 
> This is the fastest I've updated the book but take it as a parting gift!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and see you around in my other books :-)
> 
> Hope you liked the ending

**Author's Note:**

> So this is basically going to be a recovery fic as Dick comes to term with his new freedom and his new body and the fact that he's actually loved. Eventually, he'll reach the point where we can actually see normal happy Dick. 
> 
> Quick warning though. I cannot do slow burn for shit. Or consistency. So in some chapters, there might be a jump in his recovery and personality and in some it might seem like he hasn't imported in years. Sorry bout that. 
> 
> Next one will be Tim. 
> 
> Do tell me what you all think. This is my first story with the whole bat family.


End file.
